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WELCOME TO MY ANEKDOTA.

VASIKA DEN EINAI DIKA MOU ALLA KATI KAMNOUN.

Se Agglika kai Ellinika

NEW

-Pos etrogan ta frantzolakia oi pafites otan protoefthasan stin pafo?? - Me psomi!!
-17 pafites ekso apo ena club giati den mpenoun mesa?? H pinakida egrafe ano ton 18!!

-Htan mia fora h daskala tou Pompou kai erotan tous ti theloun na ginoun otan megalosoun.

-O enas lalei arxitektonas o allos georgos k.t.l.

-Eftase kai h seira tou Pompou kai lalei: Ego thelo na gino giatros (10 xronia spoudes) na kerdiso lefta na piaso ena DATSUN na poulo patates!!

-Ti leei mia ksanthia otan akousei to koudouni ths portas? Pali faoul?
-Giati mia ksanthia trexei piso apo ena asthenoforo? Epeidi kanei PIPA PIPA.
Ti koitazoun oi ksanthies se mia lefki selida?? To viografiko tous!!
-Pio einai to provlima mias Athehs ksanthias? Den exei ti na fonaksei sto krevati!!
-Pws katalavoume oti to fax pou pirame to exei stelei mia ksanthia?? Apo to grammatosimo.

-Ti to koino iparxei anamesa stis perissoteres ksanthes kai tisdhmosies toualletes? Einai kai oi dio gia dhmosia xrhsh
-Ti kanei mia ksanthia otan exei periodo?? Psaxnei na vrei pios thn pirovolise!!
-Ti leei mia ksanthia otan peinaei? Kanei peina h ego peinao??
-Pois einai o orismos mias ksanthias? Matia misanoixta, podia orthanoixta kai mavra mesanixta.
-Giati sto tavani mias ksanthis iparxei zografismeno ena A? Gia na min ksexnaei ta logia tis sto krevath.
-Giath oi ksanthies shxnazoun se xorafia?? Gia na to pezoun kalierghmenes!!
-Giath den iparxoun anekdota me melaxroinous?? Giath kapios prepei na skeftei kai ta oipolipa anekdota.
-Giath oi ksanthies den ginontai giatroi?? Epeidh mperdeoun to pano kefali me to kato!!
-Ston paradeiso:
-Tesseris gunaikes, mia ksanthia, kai treis melaxrines pethana kai pane pros ton paradeiso. Prin mpun mesa o Agios Petros rwta mia apo tis melaxroines:
-Mhpos oso hsoun zontanh, epiases peos?
-Gia na eimai elikrinhs Agie Petro mou, apantaei ekeinh akoupisa enan ligo.
-Vlepeis ekenei th sterna; ths leei ekenos. Phgenai kai pline kala to xeri sou kai mpes ston paradeiso.
-Ystera rota thn epomeni melaxrinh.
-Esy mipos epiases peos?
-Agie mou edw pou ftasame einai krima na sas po psemata. Epiasa kai me ta dio mou xeria kai malista polles fores.
- Ntropi sou ksetsipoti ths leei ekenos.
Phgenai sthn sterna pline para poli kala ta xeria sou kai meta mpes ston paradeiso.
Ma prin rotisei thn epomeni petagetai eksalli h ksantia.
-Den pistevo Agie mou na me baleis na plino to stoma mou ekei pou tha plinei prwta afth h sixameni ton kolo ths!!
-Ston kathefti :
Mia kokkinomalla, mia melaxroinh kai mia ksanth briskontai mposta de ena kathrefth o opois roufa opion skeftetai vlakies.
-Hkokkinomalla: Skeftomai..... na vapso ksanthies antavgies ta mallia mou.
-Slourrrrrp th roufa o kathreptis!
-H melaxroinh. Skeftomai.... na vapso ta mallia mou ksanta.
-Slourrrrrp th roufa o kathreptis!
-H ksanthia. Skeftomai....
-Slourrrrrp th roufa o kathreptis!
-Synantiountai dio ksanthies kai lelei h mia sthn alli:
-Ase pou na deis ti epatha extes. Hmoun sto Minion kai mphka sto ansaser, kopike to revma kai emeina 2 ores mesa.
-Ayto den einai tipota. Egw anevika stis kuliomenes skales, kophke to revma kai emeina ekei gia 4 ores!!

english

-A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged,balding man standing at the counter methodically placing "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them.His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing. The man says "I'm sending out 1,000 Valentine cards signed, 'Guess who?'" "But why?" asks the man. "I'm a divorce lawyer," the ," the man replies!!

-In front of you stand four men: Adolf Hitler, Idi Amin, Saddam Hussein and a lawyer. You are holding a gun which contains only three bullets. Who do you shoot?Use all three bullets on the lawyer!!

-An attorney telephoned the governor just after midnite, insisting that he talk to him regarding a matter of utmost urgency.An aide eventually agreed to wake up the governor."So, what is it?" grumbled the governor. "Judge Garber has just died" said the attorney, "and I want to take his place."Replied the governor: "Well, it's OK with me if it's OK with the undertaker!!"

-Q:How does a blonde know shes in love? A: She throws her panties against the wall to see if they stick!!! -

Q: Why did the blonde jump over the glass wall?A: To see what was on the other side!!

-Q: What is the difference between a male blonde and a female blonde?A: The female blonde has a higher sperm count!!

-Q. Why does a blonde smile in a lightning storm? A. They think their getting their picture taken!! Q. What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade (xirovomvida) at you? A. Pull the pin and throw it back!!

-Q: Why do blondes have legs? A1: So they don't get stuck to the ground! A2: To get between the bedroom and the kitchen! A3: So they don't leave trails, like little snails!!

-Q: Did you hear about the blonde lesbian?A: She kept having affairs with men!!

-Q: What did the blonde name her pet zebra?A: Spot!Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blond's head? A: A Space Invader.

 

Afta htan ta anekdota mou. Exo alla alla na men sas prizoume

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