The summer I turned 18 and would be heading off to college in August, my Dad had a surprise for me. He showed me a saddle, and I said, “What’s that for?” and he said for the horse I got you. Surprised, I asked, “A horse?” And then he showed me the 1971 Ford Mustang he had fixed up for me. He often referred to that car as “the horse.”

Dad took being a dad seriously and that didn’t end when his kids turned 18. He always wanted to make sure we had enough, that we had what we needed. After my marriage ended and I was left in a financial mess, my parents stepped in to make sure I had enough, till I was able again to stand on my own feet financially. My Dad was always concerned about anything that went wrong with my house or my car. Even though plumbing didn’t come easy for him, when a snake had come through my sump pump and stripped it out (or whatever; I’m not mechanical), he came up from Missouri to replace it for me. He also replaced the rotting, leaking roof on the playhouse in my yard. He tried to get the garage door opener to work right for one of the doors, but after working on it for a long time, ultimately gave up; but he tried. And when my car needed a new radiator, he found an affordable one down there in Missouri, that he had shipped up here to Minnesota, and he talked with the mechanic about it and made sure I wouldn’t be overcharged. Even in recent weeks when his health was failing, Dad was concerned when my water softener quit working and wanted to make sure I would have enough to replace it.

Since his passing, I’ve come to realize that my Dad loved me much more than I knew. Dad wasn’t one to say the words, but he showed it in his actions. I will never forget in March this year when I walked into the door of their home, and Dad was right at the door, and hugged me tighter than he ever has, while crying and saying, “I thought I’d never see you again.” I hadn’t been home since October 2020. I regret that. I wish I’d gone home more often. But it’s such a long trip and lining up pet care for being away. But I wish I had gone more often. I also recall a few years ago when I encountered a cousin’s wife at their church, and she said, “Your Dad has been so anxious for you to come; it’s all he talks about.” Family was so important to Dad, and it has been hard on my parents having me living so far away.

Sometimes love is a “horse,” sometimes love is a home or car repair, sometimes unspoken love speaks loudly through actions, if we truly stop and listen.

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