Author's Note...
This is an insane Weiss Kreuz/Gundam Wing/Hanson/Moffatt/Cow/Hog/Pokemon/Pocket-Bishonen Cross over that my friend and I made up while randomly talking to eachother...Just to let you know I (kayte) am obsessed with anime while tina here, she's obsessed with boy bands *gaaaaaag* ::gets thwaped by tina:: OW!! I mean GUY bands... Anyway..we do not take responsibility if you go completely insane after reading this fic...please note that we WERE insane while making this fic ^_^ ENJOY!
Oh yeah we don't own pokemon gundam wing hanson weiss kreuz or any of that stuff so don't sue us!!
WARNING...
This fic contains umm *hints* at yaoi and if you're under 12 please don't read it!!
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The Adventures of Fruitcake Ditch
By Kayte and Tina
Tina: Hey Kayte wanna battle??
Kayte: With my bishonen?!? ::grins evily:: Sure!
Tina: I wanna kill Duo ::smiles insanely:: WOOHOO!
Kayte: ::falls out of chair from shock:: HEEEEY! ::glances lovingly over at her shrine to Duo:: I'LL KILL YOUR LITTLE SCOTT NO PROBLEM! (Note: My obsession: Duo and Ken...Tina's obsession: Scott of the Moffatts)
Tina: ::gasps:: BAH!!
Kayte: ::rummages through her pile of Bisho-Balls and finds one with a big heart drawn on it:: AH HA! ::presses a button and throws it forward:: Duo, I choose you!
Duo: ::pops out of the ball along with Heero. Both look a little er...frazzled.::
Kayte: ::blinks:: Heero!! How many times do I tell you to stay in your own ball!!
Heero: ::death glare(TM):: Omae o korosu
Kayte: ::rolls eyes and waves hand:: Yeah, yeah...::sighs, the grins:: Well I guess you'll just have to BOTH kill Scott
Tina: (Who was rolling on floor laughing from Kayte's poorly trained bishonen hops up) HEY!! That's unfair!!
Kayte: ::shrugs innocently:: Oh...too bad. DUO! HEERO! GO GET YOUR GUNDAMS!!!
::silence::
Kayte: ::blinks:: Where'd they go?!
Tina: OH EW!! ::turns away gagging and pointing at bushes were muffled sounds can be heard::
Kayte: O.O ARG!! ::Stomps over to bushes and drags the two of them out.::
Duo:Awwwwwwww Kaaaaaaaaayte!!!!
Kayte: Shut up! Let's start the battle!
Tina: ::blinks:: uh, Kayte??
Kayte: ::whips around; annoyed:: WHAT?!
Tina: How the heck did we get here?!? ::waves hand around::
::Everyone has been warped to a big open field with Gundam Wing and Deathscythe standing on the edge of it by the highway::
Kayte: ::shrugs:: It's a fic...random stuff like this happens all the time...
Tina: ::screams as a giant pikachu rambles past:: WHAT THE HELL?!
Kayte:: Riiiiiiiiiight...DUO SHOOT THAT DORK SCOTT DOWN
Tina: ::covered by shadow of Deathscythe:: BAH!! ::Duo shoots several times but when the dust clears Scott is still standing.
Duo: ::whines:: But I hit him!!
Tina: ::smiles smugly:: Scott's too COOL to be shot down
Kayte: OH COME ON!!!
Tina: ::jumping in the air with glee:: Watch out Duo! Scott's smile is BLINDING >D (it is...ask me for a picture of him, he's so hot)
Kayte Duo and Heero:: ::sweatdrop::
Kayte: ::Light Bulb:: Oh! So you wanna play dirty EH?!
Tina: ::sweatdrops:: Umm...not if in dirty you mean Yaoi...
Kayte: MUHAHAHA!! I'LL BLIND YOU WITH YAOI!!! ::glances over at Heero:: OH heeeeeeeero...::bats eyelashes::
Heero: Hn
Kayte: You see that guy over there? ::points as scott::
I heard he had the hots for you!
Heero: ::raises eyebrows:: Honto? ::looks over at Scott and winks::
Scott: ::whimpers:: Tinaaaa....
Tina: ::death glare(TM) at Kayte:: Two can play at this game...::snaps fingers and Taylor Hanson appears::
Taylor: ::blinks:: What? Where am I??
Tina: Never mind that! ::points at the braided pilot across the field:: See that guy??
Taylor: ::squints:: Isn't that a girl??
Duo: HEY I HEARD THAT ASSHOLE!
Taylor: ::sweatdrop:: Oh..umm..sorry!
Tina: Go hit on him! Now!!
Taylor: WHAT?!?! But I'm not...::gets shot by fruit-cake-o-ray:: Wow that guy is HOT!! ::taylor starts hitting on Duo and leads him away from Kayte, who is too busy pondering where she can get one of those fruit-cake-o-rays for herself and Heero, who is too busy drooling over Scott::
Heero: Hey Duo..::Still staring at Scott:: I was thinking...Duo? Duo? ACK!!! ::spots Duo being led away by a fruitified Taylor.::
Kayte: ::talking to self:: I wonder if I could buy one of those rays off the internet...::hears OMAE O KOROSU and gunshot:: Hmm...Heero really needs a new line..
Taylor: OOOOOOW! YOU SHOT ME!!
Heero: ::death glare (TM):: Yeah that was kind of the point dumbass. ::drags Duo back over by his braid::
Tina: ::evil laughter:: You can't escape! Duo has already been entranced by Taylor's intoxicating smell!!
Duo: TayTay....::hearts float around as Heero frantically tries to smash them::
Heero: Intoxicating smell huh? ::Pulls out nifty can of gasoline and pours it over Taylor::
Tina: Was that SWEET smelling gasoline Heero?
Heero: Hn? ::Bends over Taylor and sniffs:: oh..oops..
Kayte: ::stomps feet:: SWEET?!?! How can gasoline smell SWEET!? That isn't fair!!!!
Duo: ::sniffs:: mmmm....TayTay! ::cuts off part of braid and scrambles towards Taylor::
Kayte and Heero: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!! MY BELOVED BRAID!! ::look at eachother:: YOURS?!? ITS MINE!!
Heero: ::tosses match at Taylor:: HAH!! Don't even try to make me jealous!
Tina: Can you control wind in fics?
Kayte: ::blinks:: I guess so...why? ::eyes bug out of head as wind randomly blows match towards Duo's head::
Duo: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! ::runs around screaming with flaming hair::
Heero: DUO! ::following clumsily with a bucket of water:: WILL YOU STAND STILL!?!? ::Heero tosses water towards Duo and another gust of wind appears and blows all the water onto Heero:: GAAAH!
Kayte: ::covering her face with her hands crying:: DUO!!! TINA HOW COULD YOU!! ::lightbulb appears as Tina is still laughing hysterically:: Wait! ::snaps fingers and a pond appears infront of Duo::
Duo: eeeee! ::jumps in pond and resurfaces with smoldering hair::
Tina: Kayte you know you just did that to see him in wet clothes...
Kayte: ::blushes:: SHUT UP!! ::Secretly drools::
Tina: Oh look! ::fake shock:: There's a gay-eating crocodile in that pond...what a pity!
Heero: AHH!! ::jumps in pond and saves Duo. Heero is extremely happy with Duo's wet clothes::
All except the happy couple: EWWWWW! ::run away::
Heero dried off his fruity friend Duo and they went to search for a hotel room, but since they all the rooms were taken the two went and found a ditch. Which turned out to be a very deep ditch. What an open place!! What would happen if someone just happened to drive by....?
::Kayte and Tina drive down the highway in Kayte's spiffy new car::
Tina: What the HELL is that?!
Kayte: They call them ditches dork..you know..sometimes they're on the side of the road...
Tina: NO RETARD! What's that inside of the ditch??
::both squint and then realize what it is::
Tina: OH MY GOD!!! ::Screams and covers her eyes::
Kayte: OH MY GOD!! ::frantically searches for her camera:: More pics for my yaoi collection!!
Tina: KAYTE!! KEEP DRIVING!! :suddenly sees something heading towards the ditch:: what's that??
Kayte: Hn? ::still searching for camera as car swerves around road::
Tina: ::Squeals with delight:: A COW!! I LOVE COWS!!
Kayte: A HA!! ::holds up camera triumphantly:: What?? a COW?! Hey! It's blocking my view!! ::begins search for gun and car swerves around road again::
Tina: OH MY GOD!! ::gasps:: It just jumped on Duo!!
Kayte: WHAT?!?! NO! ::swerves off road to save Duo::
Meanwhile...
Duo: ...Heero? ::still partially blinded from Scott's smile::
Cow: Moooooo
Duo: ::laughs:: your so funny! (Heero is meanwhile being squished under Duo)
Tina: ::running with Kayte towards ditch:: I can't have that poor cow get involved in this yaoi affection!!
Kayte: ::not paying attention:: Hey Tina! Take my extra camera! That way I can get this from different angles! ::starts to drool::
Heero: erg!! ::finally squirms out from under Duo and the cow:: GET OFFA HIM!!
Cow: Moo(ve)
Heero: Grrr...Huh? ::Sees a flash, looks up and sees Kayte snapping away:: A camera!!! ::grabs Kayte's camera::
Kayte: HEY THAT'S MINE!! ::Heero poses and takes pictures of himself:: HEY!! ::whacks Heero:: YOU'RE WASTING MY FILM!! ::looks over at Duo:: AND WHY IS THAT COW STILL ON HIM!! ::angrily rips cow off of Duo::
Tina: Damn, Kayte! You're mighty powerful! ::kayte smiles smugly::
Duo: Heero?! Heeeeeeero?? ::sees blurry blob and grabs it happily:: HEEEEEERO!!
Tina: ::dragged down on Duo:: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
Kayte: TINA! ::starts beating Tina on the head:: How could you do this to me!?! You're SUPPOSED to be my best friend!
Tina: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SAVE ME!!!!!
Cow: moo?? ::hears cries for help and decides to rescue Tina - friend to all cows::
Tina: Cow!! ::Cow switches places with Tina:: Thank you cow!
Kayte: ::looks over from fight with Heero for the camera:: GET THE COW OFF DUO!!! ::runs over and again rips cow off::
Duo: Heero? ::reaches arms out again::
Kayte: AAAAG!! STOP!! HEERO'S GONNA KILL ME!! ::looks up to see Heero looming over her:: CRAP!!! TINA HELP!!!!
Tina: Moo? Moo mooo moo moo!!
Cow: Moo mooo moo!
Kayte: DAMN YOU COW!! ::squirms free of Duo's er..grasp and bolts past Heero but is quickly tackled:: AAAAAAAAAG! Tina!!
Tina: hehehehe!! ::snaps some shots for the newspaper::
Kayte: Please! I'm begging you! Save me!! ::Heero points gun at Kayte's head:: TINAAAA!
Tina: Damn conscience...::flashes picture of Heero and temporarily blinds him so Kayte can crawl away.
Kayte: ::Bows to Tina:: Thank you! Thank you!...::sees Tina is too busy staring at somthing with bugged out eyes:: hmm? ::turns to where Tina is gazing.:: AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
Cow: What? Oh..The Costume..::Cow is now standing on it's hind legs talking to a shocked group of people::
Heero: ..Costume?? ::All look down to see a zipper on the stomach of the cow::
Tina: Well then who is it? ::The cow unzips the costume and out jumps a cute red headed bishonen::
ALL: AYA KUN?!?!?!?! ::blinks:: er...::realize aya was basically wearing the cow suit and nothing else::
Duo: ::vision slightly restored sees Aya:: Whhhhoooooaaa!! Wanna join us? ::winks::
Kayte and Tina: ewwwww ::scramble out of ditchand head towards car::
Tina: Hey Kayte..you hear that?
Kayte: What? ::looks over to rustling grass a few feet away::
Tina: It..It's a hog!!!
Kayte: EEEEEEE!!! Maybe I've ridden it before! (Kayte is a professional Hog Rider and has been seen at several rodeos)
Tina: RIDE THAT HOG! ::Rodeo music randomly comes on as Kayte jumps on the hog::
Kayte: Hey! This doesn't feel riiiIIIIII!! ::gets thrown off:: OOFF!! ::rubs head::
Tina: Umm..Kayte..you might want to get up...
Kayte: Hn? ::looks uo to see she was thrown back in the ditch with duo, heero and aya...:: EEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWW!!! ::tries to claw her way up the dirt wall::
Hog: SQUEEEEEEEE!! ::runs and jumps into the ditch and lands on Kayte, causing them both to fall down again::
Kayte: STUPID HOG...wait..::sees a zipper on the stomach of THIS guy too:: you too?
