Author: Karen S.
Email: kesblace@yahoo.com
Summary: The occupants of the X-mansion teach Jubilee to drive.
Rating: PG
Disclaimer. Not mine. Don’t sue.
Feedback: Be a responsible reader and send me some.
Author’s Notes: I liked the idea of the X-men teaching Jubilee to drive and added Bishop just to have someone refuse to teach her. So there.
DRIVER'S EDUCATION
"You want me to what?" Jubilee stared at Rogue as though the woman had lost her mind.
"Wait 'til Ah get t'the other side of the field, then punch the accelerator. When ya get close t'me, slam on the brakes. That's how mah daddy taught me ta drive. 'Course he'd had a bit of that homemade moonshine before we went out..." Rogue got out of the junky maintenance truck the groundskeepers used.
Jubilee watched her fly to the other end of the field and, when she landed, did as the woman had told her.
Rogue sat up and glared at the taillights, picking grass out of her hair.
Jubilee leaned out the window. "Guess I didn't stop fast enough."
"Ya think, Sugah?"
"Check the tires."
"I checked the tires."
"Did you kick them?"
"Why on earth would I do that?"
"To see if they need air."
There was a pause, then Scott repeated, "did you kick them?"
"Uh...yeah, sure."
"Okay. Adjust the seat."
Adjust the seat? Was his visor somehow blinding him that he couldn't see she'd already adjusted the bloomin' seat? "I did that."
"Now the mirrors. Mirrors are very important, they show you where all the other drivers on the road are."
"Duh."
"What did you say, Jubilee?"
"Nothing."
"Oh. Well, look at everything on the dash and make certain all the switches are on off."
"Yeah. Did that."
"Okay, let's go."
Jubilee watched his fingers curl around the armrest in a white-knuckled grip, his feet braced on the floor.
"Why haven't you started the car?"
"You never gave me the keys."
"Oh."
What seemed to be a pained shudder wracked him for a moment before he handed her the keys. She put them in the ignition--
"Did you check the tires?"
"Yes."
"What about--"
"I've checked everything, Scott, twice. Can we do this already, because this part I've got down pat? It's the actual driving part that I'm not too good at."
"You have driven before though, right."
"More or less."
"Gently turn the key, and release it."
Scott's' car purred, the engine barely above a low whisper. Jubilee glanced at him. A line of sweat ran down his face and his jaw was clenched. "Okay."
"More or less?"
"Can I have the radio on?"
"No. More or less?"
"Rogue made me drive at her in the field." She put the car into gear.
"I think maybe we'd better just forg--"
The tires squealed and Scott turned faintly green.
"How can you stand to drive with Scott in the car?"
Jean glanced up from her shopping list with a smile. "What do you mean?"
"He's like such a backseat driver. If he could have driven in the passenger seat, he would have. You're so much cooler though. You let me have the radio on." Jubilee pulled out, passed a decrepit Ford Ltd and pulled back in the lane, barely missing getting them hit by an oncoming semi. The semi driver blew his horn at them.
Jeans' life flashed before her eyes in those few seconds, and she'd barely recovered when the girl did it again.
After several more moments of seeing her life flashing, Jean smiled tightly at Jubilee. "I think that's enough driving for today."
"You sure? Because I can drive for hours."
"Quite sure. Pull over. Now!"
"Gambit?" Jubilee chewed on her lip a moment, glancing at the passenger seat where Remy LeBeau sat. He wasn't paying any attention to her driving; hadn't been paying any attention to her driving, since he'd fallen asleep before they'd even left the driveway. She sighed and glanced at the ordering speaker outside her window. "Remy." He mumbled unintelligibly and snored louder, cheek on his shoulder. Poking him in the leg didn't work, so she drew in a deep breath. "OH MY GOD!"
He jerked, eyes comically wide. The seat fell back with a thud as he struggled to sit up, his hair in his eyes. "Wha'...Wha' happen? You okay, P'tite? We in an accident or somet'in'?" His coat had left an imprint in his cheek, and he fumbled for the seat latch again. As he righted the seat, his bo staff fell from his coat and opened to full length, scratching the ceiling of the car.
She tried not to laugh. "Or something, Remy. What do you want to eat?"
"Umm.." He yawned, shrugged, eyes sleepy. "Super-size double bacon chili cheeseburger, fries and a Pepsi."
"You buyin'?"
"Yeah, sure." He fought with his bo staff, returned it to his coat and drew out his wallet.
"Then I'll have the same."
They ate at a park nearby, and as soon as the car began to move again, he was out. Jubilee flashed a disgusted look at him when she braked in front of the mansion and left him there, asleep and snoring in the car, with a sign taped to the passenger window the read, "I'm a narcoleptic dork, look at me."
He promised to get back at her later.
Storm took out her cell phone, lips set in a rigid line. "You will not drive my car again, Jubilation. The penalty for doing so will be bathroom cleaning duty for a month."
"But..."
"Cars are not supposed to fly. I don't care what Logan has been teaching you. If I ever catch you doing that again...." She let the threat hang and dialed the towing company just outside of Salem.
Jubilee leaned over and stared mournfully at the car nose first in the gully.
"Are you sure, Professor? 'Cause I'm sure Scott or someone besides me will be back any second."
"I'm sure, Jubilee. Now don't be nervous. Relax and enjoy yourself. Forget that you're in charge of two tons of motorized steel."
She gulped.
"That was a joke, Jubilee. I'm sure you'll do fine. Now, let's drive."
Three hours later, they were pulled over by a Salem cop.
"What can I do for you, Officer?" Jubilee asked courteously.
"Hello there, Miss, Mr. Xavier. Sorry to stop you, but we just got a call from a Scott Summers. He seemed pretty certain you'd been in a horrible accident."
"As you can see, we're fine."
"Might wanna turn on your cell phone...."
Xavier patted his pocket. "I must have forgotten it."
"No problem, I'll just have someone phone the school, tell them you're fine."
"We're on our way back now."
"Great, I'll pass that along. Have a good afternoon then."
"Perhaps you should consider enrolling in a class that gives professional instruction to those who--"
"Never mind, Hank." Jubilee decided she wasn't up to Hank telling her how to drive.
"Bishop..."
"No."
"But..."
"No."
"I've improved..."
"Says who?"
"Logan."
"Hahaha-no." He folded his arms and scowled."
"Well fine, you big time-jumping meanie."
Wolverine held out his hand. "The keys, Jubilee."
"Aww c'mon Wolvie, I'm just getting good at driving."
He snorted. "You damn near slammed me through the windshield at that last red light when you remembered to stop--"
"I remembered, "she retorted, "I simply couldn't find the clutch. Besides, you should always wear a seatbelt."
"You ran a stop sign--"
"It wasn't there last time, I swear it wasn't!"
"You shouldn't swear, and you took up two parking places at the store--"
"I didn't want anyone to park too close to your jeep and scratch it. I know how grouchy you get if it looks like there's a ding in it. I was only being considerate--"
Rogue came out onto the steps, grinning as she listened to the good-natured banter between Wolverine and Jubilee about Jubilees' driving. She had her learners' permit and he was the only one who'd get in a vehicle with her more than once. Rogue shook her head and folded her arms.
"Having a learners' permit, Jubilee, doesn't mean you need to learn fifty ways to smash up my jeep and kill your passengers."
"Passen-ger."
"What?"
"Passen-ger. As in single. As in everyone else is afraid to get in a car with me." She grinned. "Except you."
He looked her up and down. "The keys. Now."
Rogue suspected he was trying to figure out which of Jubilees' many pockets his keys were in.
"I'm not that bad a driver. I'm starting to get the hang of it now--if it weren't for that stupid clutch, I'd have it."
Wolverine crossed his arms, suppressed a smile and leaned against the side of the jeep. "You still can't shift."
Jubilee shrugged, twirling her bright red sunglasses. "You're not gonna let me forget that, are you?"
Rogue started down the steps. "What happened?"
"I couldn't find first."
"She tried to take off in third, then put it in reverse and nearly totaled Jeans' car."
"I had plenty of room!"
He raised a brow as Rogue began chuckling. "Six inches, kid. Six little inches."
"That's half a foot, plenty of room..." Jubilees’ grin was impish and she handed him his keys.
"You're improving. Slowly, but improving." He put the keys in his pocket. "Just remember the clutch is left of the brake."
"My brain knows it, but my feet forget."
"Tomorrow. Four o'clock. Another few days and maybe you'll remember that stop sign." With a raised brow that somehow managed to convey both humor and warning, Wolverine moved up the steps to the mansion.
Jubilee hoisted herself up onto the hood of the jeep. "Maybe in another few days he'll wear his seatbelt, " she muttered.
"Not likely, Sugah, " Rogue drawled.
"Jubilee!"
"What?" She looked at the front door. Wolverine had paused at the door, his back to them.
"Get off the hood, Darlin'." He tossed a glance at her, then went inside.
Wolverine waited while Jubilee got her picture taken. As drivers' license photos went, it was fairly decent. He held out his keys to her. "Here kid."
Jubilee sighed. "You drive. I'm sick of it."
She was in the passenger seat before he even moved. Didn't want to drive? She had her license, finally, and she didn't want to drive? Logan shook his head and moved to the jeep.
Teenagers.
Sheesh.
