Don’t ask how this idea popped in my head. Just know that I don’t own
Escaflowne or SNL.
Hyper Dilandau
(scene opens with Dilandau struggling to get out a leash that is hooked to a tree in a
forest)
Hitomi: (coming out from behind the trees) What a beautiful day. It’s
so-Dilandau?! What are you doing here?!
Dilandau: (still struggling to get free) Folkie is at the nearby market, and didn’t
want me running off.
Hitomi: I can understand where he’s coming from, but a leash?! I think that’s a
little cruel.
Dilandau: Folkie thinks it’s very necessary. One time, when the Vione was
having mechanical problems, Folkie strapped the leash to the starboard and gave me a
soda and three chocolate bars. I dragged that thing six miles, and when I got home, I
was tired.
Hitomi: I would suppose so...
Dilandau: Know what? I have ADHD and like to burn things. I’m a hyper
pyro.
Hitomi: (rolls eyes) I had no idea...
Dilandau: Even though I’m a guy, I’m beautiful.
Hitomi: I’m beautiful and a half.
Dilandau: I’m beautiful and three-fourths.
Hitomi: I’m beautiful plus infinty.
Dilandau: I’m beautiful plus infinty...plus one!
Hitomi: Whatever. (unwraps a bar of chocolate) Want some?
Dilandau: You’re the devil!
Hitomi: (muttering) That’s not the first time somebody’s called me that.
Dilandau: You’re the devil!
Hitomi: (in sing song voice) Are you sure you don’t want any? It’s really
good...
(Dilandau takes one piece, but then stuffs the whole package in his mouth as he
struggles to get out of the leash. He finally gets free, and is seen running through Gaea
with an uprooted oak tree dragging behind him)
THE END
Note: I do not mean to offend people with ADHD or with their loved ones who have this
disorder, but it was a part of the original SNL script that I thought fitted with
Dilandau’s character. Someone very close to me has ADHD, and I would never mean to
offend anyone if I've written something wrong. Thank you. 
