Ranma held Akane protectively in his arms, afraid to let her go. He wasn't used to supporting her; she had always been tough as an ox, strong as a bull, and extremely independent. It was one of the many things he loved about her-- although he'd always been reluctant to admit it.

     "Come on ya stupid tomboy," Ranma yelled angrily, holding her tighter against him. "Wake up already!"

     Ranma found himself forcing back a sob as bits and pieces of his shattered memory came rushing back at him.

      Soon, Ranma Saotome would remember it all.

     *Akane she's not breathing!*

     Ranma grabbed a tea pot and quickly dumped the hot water over his head, turning back into a boy instantly. Once he was finished he threw the pot behind him and took off his shirt, putting it on Akane's naked body. He never realized how great it felt to hold her in his arms: he only wished it could have been under different circumstances.

     Ranma remembered everything he had been through, right up until Akane had sacrificed herself to save him. He could feel the anger quickly building up inside, and felt the consequent fear, anger, and remorse as it finally exploded.

     "This is all because... you pulled that crazy stunt trying to save me. Akane... you're so stupid."

     He paused, realization sinking in at what he just said. Ranma did the only thing he could think of. He punched himself. Hard.

     "That's wrong... I'm sorry... I really... want to say thank-you. I'm sorry Akane... because I'm so awkward."

     Ranma leaned his head against Akane's, wishing she'd wake up. He couldn't help but feel guilty. He always said the first thing that came to mind, not bothering to think of the consequences his words would have.

     "I can never tell you what I really feel... So, I keep making you mad and hurting you."

     Ranma observed Akane's face, memorizing every line. *I can't believe I ever called her uncute. She's so beautiful.*

     "Wake up Akane... I... want to tell you something."

     Ranma lifted Akane's head up, bringing her body closer to his. He was about to say something he'd been trying to say for a long time now.

     "Akane... you can hear me... can't you?"

     Ranma felt tears coming to his eyes. He couldn't stand seeing her so helpless.

     Then, he tried to imagine his life without her: but it was so empty.

     He finally realized something: everything he'd ever done, he'd done for her. He had risked his life countless times, to save her. She was his life: nothing else mattered. If she didn't live, he didn't want to live.

     What's the point of living, if part of your heart and soul is gone?

     A single tear fell from his eye, hitting Akane's cheek.

     Ranma pulled Akane closer to him, finally realizing that she could die, that she *might* die. Finally all of the anguish and denial that had built up over the years exploded. Ranma couldn't hide his feelings anymore. Closing his eyes tightly, Ranma shouted the few words he could never say to Akane, let alone admit to himself. *Let me tell you I love you Akane!*

     "Akane!"

     At that moment Akane had woken up.

     "This is all your fault! If you had just told me about the nanniichuan in the first place..."

     "Well, did it ever occur to you that I might *want* to get married?" Akane asked angrily.

     "What?" Ranma asked, staring at her in confusion. Akane continued to look at the floor, avoiding his eyes. "BUT WHY?" he continued, a slight blush lighting his face. "Do you WANT to ruin our lives or somethin'?"

     Akane's entire body tensed as she clenched her fist. "Just forget I said anything," she replied angrily.

     Ranma paused, considering Akane's words, not sure if he had heard her correctly. "Akane... are--are you sayin you WANT to marry me?"

     Akane refused to look straight into Ranma's eyes, afraid of what she'd see there. If she saw rejection, disbelief or pity. She wouldn't be able to handle it.

     "Well... I-I guess so..." she replied meekly, looking down at her feet.

     "You-you do?" Ranma asked.

     "Ranma... I--I love you," she said softly, barely above a whisper. "But I can't wait around forever. I- I won't."

     Ranma stared intently into Akane's eyes, recognizing all of the mixed emotions he saw in them. The two most obvious: hope and fear. He knew he should be thrilled that Akane had just said she loved him, but for some reason... it just made him hurt more.

     "Akane. It's... it's just that there's... there's things I can't explain. I mean, I have a thousand different voices screaming in my head; each one telling me something different. It-- it gets so confusing, and I just can't handle it. I can't be sure these feelings are really mine... or something I'm being made to feel." Ranma took a deep breath staring intently at Akane's serious expression. "Is any of this making any sense to you?"

     Akane shook her head no, a confused expression on her face. "What voices are you talking about? You- you don't have split personalities or anything, do you?"

     "No, I don't have split personalities." Ranma sighed in frustration, tugging at his pigtail nervously. *This is gonna to be harder than I thought.*

     "Okay... Let me try explaining this better. I have all these conflicting emotions that are telling me something different. It's kinda like when my mom didn't know about mine and pop's curses. One moment I would want to crawl and hide somewhere whenever she came over, ashamed of her seeing me as some kinda cursed freak. Other times I would want to scream, "Here, I am! This is the real me!" and just pray that she would understand and still consider me a man. And yet other times I wished... she would make us commit seppuku, so all my problems could be solved."

     "But, Ranma... having mixed feeling about something is normal. Almost everybody goes through a certain period of their life when they have doubts. Its an important time in our lives... we make decisions that will last a life time... choices we may never have a chance to take back. Its what life is all about: making decisions and living with them."

     "Akane... my decision won't only affect me! It'll effect practically everyone I know. People I care for and people who care for me."

     "Ranma, I know that. But, some things are necessary! Some decisions are worth making... no matter what effects it has on the people involved. It gives a sense of closure, and forces people to make the best of a bad situation and move on."

     "Akane..."

     "Ranma, who are you in love with?" Akane asked, taking his hand in hers and giving it a gentle squeeze. "Ranma... please. I need to know."

     "Akane... I can't."

     "YES YOU CAN!" she screamed in frustration. "You said it once at Jusendou..."

     "Look... I panicked okay?! I saw you laying there, and--and I did the only thing I could think of..."

     "You cried and told me you loved me..." she finished for him.

     "I NEVER said I loved you!!!!" Ranma yelled defensively.

     "Fine. You didn't tell me," Akane replied sadly.

     "Akane..."

     "Look, I'm really tired," Akane sighed, as she turned away from Ranma and climbed onto her bed. "Could you please leave now?"

     "Akane... don't you think we should talk bout this some more?"

     "Why bother? You've already made your decision. Now, if you don't mind I'd like to get some sleep: after all, an uncute girl like me needs all the beauty sleep she can get. How else am I going to catch a husband?"

     Akane turned away from Ranma, ending the conversation, her blanket wrapped tightly around her body.

     Ranma stared at her uncomfortably, unsure what to do. Part of him wanted to leave and forget the whole conversation ever took place... but, another part of him wanted to take Akane in his arms and repeat over and over how much he loves her. The hard part was deciding which voice to listen to.

     Suddenly, Ranma heard Akane's voice echoing in his head, repeating the same sentence over and over again. *Some decisions are worth making...* Ranma looked down at Akane's still form, her blanket wrapped smugly against her body.

     Ranma smiled to himself, finally realizing what he had to do... what he should have done a long time ago. He almost lost her once. There was no way in hell he was going to lose her again.

     Ranma took a deep breath and moved towards Akane's bed, a determined expression on his face.

     He knew exactly what he wanted. He wanted Akane.

     Ranma sat down on the edge of Akane's bed and grabbed her shoulders, turning her around so that she lay facing him. Her face was smeared with tears, and her hair was clinging to her wet face.

     Ranma lifted Akane's chin, forcing her to look him straight in the eyes. She did so, unwillingly, and chewed her lip nervously, as she tried to stop the tears from flowing.

     "Akane I...I know I can be a jerk sometimes, and that I always open my big fat mouth, and say something I shouldn't, but... the truth is... I love you," he whispered, his voice cracking. "I've loved you for as long as I can remember."

     "Do you really mean it?" Akane asked hopefully, watching him with a weary eye-- almost afraid to believe.

     "Come on, Akane! Would I lie about something like this?"

     "Yes," Akane deadpanned. "Remember when Shampoo had that cursed brooch?"

     Ranma laughed nervously as he ran his hands through his hair. "Oh, you still remember that, huh?"

     Akane crossed her arms over her chest, an angry scowl quickly covering her face. "Of course! Did you really think I'd ever forget?"

     "Oh, come on Akane. Shampoo means nothin to me. I LOVE YOU! not her!"

     Akane's face softened at Ranma's declaration. "I-I love you too."

     Ranma pulled Akane to him, his eyes never leaving hers. "Ya know... I really did mean it: you really are cute when you smile."

     Akane blushed as Ranma closed his eyes and leaned towards her. Their hearts, beating as one, pounded in their chests. Finally, Akane closed her eyes, and their lips met.

     When they kissed there were no fireworks, and the song Aleluja didn't echo in their heads. But it was still perfect regardless. It was something that both of them would never forget...

     Or so they thought.

     Ranma was in shock.

     The first wave of memories had hit him like a brick wall. But he didn't care. He was finally remembering, that was the important thing...

     Shampoo had no control over him anymore.

TO BE CONTINUED