Journal of a Living Lady #112

 

Nancy White Kelly

 

        When my father was in the last stages of terminal cancer, it was determined that he needed heart by-pass surgery. However, it was a moot issue. There was no point in his going through all that when death from cancer was both a virtual certainty and imminent.

          It is strange  how I am going through a similar scenario. After my recent emergency hospital visit, I dutifully followed up with a  cardiologist  who is quite respected. He was kind, but blunt. No point. Actually I was relieved.

Though I am terminally ill, I don’t think death is on the immediate horizon. It could be, but why spend my last days teasing with ventricular homicide. I would rather be fishing or watching the waves of the ocean crest with foam.

Without the support of friends and family and an abiding faith, I would be a wuss. I know the buoyancy I am experiencing is not my own. It comes from the unseen.

This I also know. Angels come in disguise sometimes. Angels unaware. Literal angels.

Though we may not be able to see angels, neither can we see the aura of a nuclear field, the structure of an atom or ordinary electricity flowing through copper wiring. Just because we don’t understand a phenomena doesn’t make it any less real.

Geese have a sophisticated guidance system. Deer have an uncanny sense of smell. The lowly bat has an amazing radar system. Yet, none of these creatures have the wow factor of an angel.

There is such despicable violence and immorality all around us. Yet, it is ironic that  one of the most popular television programs is “Touched by an Angel.” This is confirmation that we want to believe. We need to believe. We choose to believe.

Relegate the humanistic intellectuals to their dismal abyss of reasoning.  Bring on the children who haven’t been tainted by philosophical skepticism.

There was little girl who, like me,  walked daily to and from school in a time when it was safe.  One morning bad weather was threatening. Clouds were forming. As the afternoon progressed, strong winds sporadically surged. 

The mother of the little girl was concerned that her daughter would be frightened as she walked home from school. In fact, that mother, like mine, was terrified of electrical storms.

The thunder roared. Lightening cut through the dark sky.  The child’s mother tensely drove along the school route looking for her daughter. About a block away, the mother spotted her little girl meandering along. 

Strangely, with each flash of lightening, the girl would stop, look up and smile. She did this over and over. The mother  caught up with the child. Motioning the little girl into the car, the curious mother asked, “What are you doing?”

 The child answered , “Smiling! God keeps taking pictures of me."

 

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May 10, 2001