Journal of a Living Lady #231

 

Nancy White Kelly

 

            I didn’t mean to do it. I really didn’t. Cry, that is. But when Charlie called to tell me that it was official, I got misty. The doctor had confirmed what we had privately known since our trip to Washington, DC. Tori was pregnant. She and Charlie are expecting their first child in March.

            I know that all grandparents get excited with such news, but my case is a little different. The regular readers of this column, and those that have my book, know that getting to see my first blood-line grandchild is a miracle beyond miracles.

            In 1985, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. My greatest concern was that I might not live to see our son, who was born after 15 years of marriage, live to graduate from high school. I am not a beggar usually, but I distinctly remember begging God to let me live for that occasion which was then 12 years away.

            After surgery and chemotherapy, it seemed I had beaten the disease. Then, just as Charlie was nearing his high school graduation, the cancer returned to my lungs and subsequently bones. I didn’t complain. God had specifically granted my prayer. I was grateful.

            While Charlie was in college, I battled the disease with even more surgery, chemotherapy, and radiation. At one point I was in hospice. But, being a believer in the Word of God, I asked some friends to come pray with me in accordance with James 4:14-15. It was in that moment that I knew a new miracle was in the making. I was given an extension on life. I saw Charlie not only graduate from college, but soon thereafter marry a fine young lady. He is a teacher and a Minister to Children.

            Last week I got news from my scans that the cancer appears to be advancing again in the bones. That coincided with Charlie’s news that the pregnancy was confirmed. You know Who I called. One more time, Lord. I want to see my grandchild. I believe He heard me.

            I know we all wonder why God answers some prayers and not others. I believe He answers them all. Frequently we have not because we ask not. Sometimes God has a better plan.

            Many people ask me to pray for them and I do. But, to be honest, I wonder sometimes why God would want to heal certain persons. They weren’t doing a thing for Him before they were ill and, unless they have a change of heart, they aren’t going to do anything afterwards. All we can do is pray that God gets their attention, heals them, and that they count for something the rest of their days.

            Oops! I sound like a preacher and I am not. I struggle to figure this all out just like you. This I know. I’d rather believe and be right than not to believe and be wrong.

            I hope my next column will make you smile, but this week I am not in an amused­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­ mood. Life is serious and time is short.