Journal of a Living Lady #38

Nancy White Kelly

Thanksgiving Day has particular significance to me. It was during Thanksgiving week, 1982, that we buried my father at the age of 62. He died from stomach cancer. Last Thanksgiving week, we buried my mother at the age of 75. Statistically, according to one of my doctors, the latest I could hope to make it with my metastatic breast cancer was this Thanksgiving, 1999. If you don't see my obituary, it is reasonable to assume I beat the odds.

What am I thankful for this Thanksgiving week? One thing I am grateful for is that my name is not "Carol." Two friends with metastatic breast cancer with that name have died in the last few weeks. I have another friend named "Carol" with the same disease who is being courted by the angels right now. Coincidence that they were all named "Carol?" Sure. But I am still glad that isn't my name.

When you have terminal illness, your "thankful" list is to the point. I am thankful for the parents I had. They were the greatest. I am thankful for my husband, Buddy. He is the greatest too. I am thankful for our son, Charlie. He is the greatest in my book. I do know other adjectives, but none are superior to "great." I also have the greatest sister, brothers, and an adopted son who, in spite of his youthful follies, is great in my book too. Through no fault of his own, he started out his life with huge handicaps. It is taking him longer to recognize his worth and to achieve his potential. But he will.

Mostly I am thankful to serve a great God. If you read this column regularly, it is no secret that I proclaim to be a Christian. There was and is no merit on my part. I have not lived up to the Ten Commandments. I am not proud of it.

Jimmy Carter was ridiculed by the media for admitting that he had "lusted in his heart." I don't think I was alone in admiring his honesty. Just recently I read he was voted one of the most respected men of this century. Maybe historically he wasn't our greatest President, but at least he has lived his life with integrity and has put his Christianity into action.

If I were judged by my good deeds versus my bad, maybe the scale would tip slightly in favor of the good. However, I am not counting on good deeds to get me to heaven. My interpretation of salvation involves unmerited favor known theologically as "grace." For those who desire a concrete Biblical reference, it is found in Ephesians 2:8-9, "For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast."

Last year I found one of those pretty little cards in a Christian bookstore with my name on it. It was nice to discover that "Nancy" means "Grace." I bought the card and put it in my Bible. It is a daily thanksgiving reminder. I would rather walk with Him by faith
than walk alone by sight.

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e-mail: nancyk@alltel.net web: https://www.angelfire.com/bc/nancykelly