Journal of a Living Lady #41

Nancy White Kelly

The most amazing fact about waking up each morning for me is that I am alive for another day. I am through asking how long I have. Even though doctors give educated guesses based on experience and statistics, in actuality, only God knows. It is not a major issue anymore as I've learned to be grateful for each day and not to take tomorrow for granted. All I ask is that my next of kin makes sure I am truly dead before burying my body. I have a reason for requesting this.

Even though I was born and raised in the South, I never understood the term "wake." Maybe it is a cultural thing. We had "viewings" and funerals, but the idea of sitting around with the body was not something my family did during my childhood. Since my parents and grandparents are all deceased now, I can't ask if it was a custom further back in our history.

Death has been a subject I've become accustomed to since the recurrence of my cancer. Curiosity got the best of me and I researched the word "wake." What I discovered was quite interesting.

Seems that lead cups were formerly used to drink whiskey and moonshine. The combination of lead and alcohol often knocked the user out for a couple of days. Eventually someone would come along, take the person for dead, and prepare the body for possible burial. During the interim, the body was laid out on the kitchen table and the family would gather around, eating and drinking, waiting to see if the person would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a "wake."

My grandfather, an O'Leary, was born in London, England. He was raised in an orphanage for a few years and was eventually adopted by a Canadian family named "White." Therefore, I have always had a personal interest in English history.

England developed a serious problem in the late 1800's. This little country started running out of places to bury people. Englanders would dig up coffins and take the bones to an undisclosed place and reuse the grave for a while. In the course of doing this, an eerie fact was uncovered. One out of 25 caskets had scratch marks on the inside. Apparently the English had unknowingly been burying people alive. This led to the idea of tying a string around the wrist of the deceased. The string would be threaded through the wooden coffin and up through to the exposed ground where it would be tied to a bell. This is where the term "graveyard shift" originated and other phrases liked "saved by the bell" or a "dead ringer."

To prevent a lot of wasted time, if my doctor says I am dead, check to see if I am breathing. If I am, hold a wake. If my chest is not going up and down, bury me. If you hear a bell, your oven timer just went off.

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nancyk@alltel.net web: https://www.angelfire.com/bc/nancykelly