iMPACT

August 23, 2007

Comments in italics by Sassy

Prelude to the show: The Truth and Pacman from last week and the Angles beating up Abyss from last week.  We go to the parking lot with Jeremy Borash meeting the Angles as they are pulling into the parking lot.  Karen refuses to get out of the car, Kurt has to make her get out and then she screams and whines about not being a wrestler and Kurt had better get her out of this – referring to the match between Kurt and Rick and Scott Steiner and, if Kurt loses, the Steiner Brothers get time in the ring with Karen. Karen tells Kurt to carry his titles himself and Kurt tells JB he needs a divorce.

I am yawning and the show hasn’t started yet.

Our announcers are Mike Tenay and Don West. 

Mixed Tag Team Tag Match

Robert Roode & Ms. Brooks versus Kaz & Gail Kim

Before the bell rings, Ms. Brooks knocks Gail off the ring apron and onto the floor.  Roode goes after Kaz as the referee attempts to drag Ms. Brooks back to her own corner.  Kaz takes several boots to the midsection and is up against the ropes. Roode sends several fists to the skull of Kaz before sending him into the ropes.  Kaz is off the ropes, slides under Roode and as Roode turns around, Kaz takes him down with an arm drag and then another. Roode is against the ring post and Kaz runs and drives his weight into Roode. Kaz swings Roode toward the ropes, but Roode gets the switch and sends Kaz into the ring post. As Roode goes after Kaz, he gets a boot to the jaw.  Kaz hesitates a second to stare down Ms. Brooks giving Roode time to recover. Roode catches Kaz and takes Kaz down with a spine buster, goes for the pin and gets a two count.  Roode has Kaz down assailing him with fists as the referee tries to break it up. Roode stomps Kaz with a boot as Kaz struggles to his feet, sending him back down to the mat. We see Gail just getting back to her feet and onto the ring apron. Roode takes Kaz down with a neck breaker, goes for the pin and gets a two count again. Gail stands on the ropes in her corner trying to distract Roode while Kaz is down. Roode hits Kaz in the head with a fist and a knee to the midsection, picks Kaz up out of the corner and throws him over to the mat. Roode comes off the ropes, grabs Kaz by the neck and flips over him.  Roode stops to show himself off to the audience and is gets the expected negative reaction.  Roode picks Kaz up and throws him into the corner post, but Kaz goes up in the air, comes down behind Roode and takes him down to the mat hitting the back of Roode’s head hard on the mat. Both men are down and Gail is doing her best to get Kaz to their side of the ring for a tag.  Roode is up first and heads for Kaz as Kaz gets to his feet. Kaz ducks under the waiting clothesline and goes up in the air delivering a fist to the head to take Roode down to the mat.  Again Gail is trying to get Kaz to tag her in but Kaz delivers a one legged drop kick to Roode sending him crashing down again, then sends him up and over in a body drop. Forearm to Roode’s face, backing Roode into the ropes, as Kaz sets Roode up to send him into the ropes, Roode gets a switch and Kaz goes into the ropes.  Kaz comes off the ropes, avoids the clothesline, and goes into the far ropes, off those ropes, ducks another clothesline and as he goes into the ropes near Gail, she comes off the top rope and tries to take Roode out with a hurricane rana, but gets caught by Roode instead. Kaz sweeps Roode’s legs sending him to the mat with Gail sitting on Roode’s chest. Gail tries to pin Roode but doesn’t get the count before Roode powers out. Gail yells at Roode, he takes a swing at her but she ducks out of the way. Ms. Brooks slaps Roode in the back to make the tag and Gail hits her with a spear as she enters the ring. Kaz dives at Roode taking them both over the top rope and onto the floor. In the ring, Gail backs Ms. Brooks into the ropes but as they come off the ropes, Ms. Brooks turns and hits Gail in the arm then sends a foot into Gail’s abdomen before taking Gail by the neck.  Gail gets turned, swings around Ms. Brooks and gets a roll up, a three count and wins the match.  Ms. Brooks and Roode both have private temper tantrums before Roode turns on Ms. Brooks.  She yells back at him and shoves him.  Roode gets in her face and backs her around the ring telling her he will fire her.  Kaz comes in the ring behind Roode, shoves Roode away from Ms. Brooks.  Roode shoves Kaz in the face but Kaz turns around and takes a swing at Roode.  The two exchange blows in the center of the ring until Kaz comes off the floor with a boot sending Roode through the ropes and onto the floor. Ms. Brooks is left alone in the ring with Kaz as the referee goes to check on Roode. Kaz asks for the microphone and tells Roode that there are two things wrong with him.  One is he is a prick and number two he has no idea how to treat a real lady. Kaz tells Roode to watch and learn and Kaz kisses Ms. Brooks on the check.  Ms. Brooks smiles and Roode is fuming outside the ring.

Why is there not a women’s division in TNA?  I’m a Gail Kim fan and she does now and then get to strut her stuff in the six sided ring, but Ms. Brooks only gets to show off a few of her wrestling talents. These girls deserve a chance to show how well they can wrestle without having to be in mixed tag team matches. Kaz and Gail worked very well together in the ring.  Kaz was his usual talented self and I hope he knows how many female hearts did somersaults when he gave Ms. Brooks that little peck on the cheek.  Roode is no slouch in the ring and he did a nice job of entertaining the fans during this match.

Tenay and West go into a spiel about Pacman being there again and use the phrase “All in the Family” referring to the Angle clan. Tenay then reminds us that Abyss beat Christian Cage in the First Blood Match last week and that TNA cameras went to the home of Christian where Christian was in a very somber mood.  The camera switches to show Christian sitting in a chair with a cold bottle of soda against his head. Tomko and AJ Styles standing on either side of him. Christian says he doesn’t think he’s going to be able to make it to the show on Thursday and there will be a lot of upset people. AJ looks on with sympathy while Tomko is having trouble keeping a straight face. Christian bursts into what appears to be tears telling AJ that he is afraid his livelihood may be taken away.  AJ drops to one knee and holds Christian’s hand while Tomko looks like he would rather be somewhere else. Christian asks what he is going to tell his wife and his four children and reminds everyone that they have twins on the way.  AJ mentions that he hasn’t seen Christian’s wife and asks where she is and Christian says she is out shoveling the driveway. Christian gives Tomko and AJ his final request that is to make him proud. Christian says all he asks is that they take care of Samoa Joe. AJ says revenge is coming, tells Tomko to come on and charges out of the room.  Tomko, standing with his arms crossed, says “Twins on the way, huh”, then pats Christian on the chest, calls him boss and tells him not to worry about it, the will take care of it – again.

I swear it looked like Christian was in a hospital gown although you could only see him from the waist up. As much as I normally think these little skits are a big waste of time, this one was actually funny.  I don’t know if the three have been taking acting lessons or if the writers were just that good this time around but it made me laugh. 

Back from commercial break and the camera is in a vehicle with Cowboy James Storm who says he is the man who is mostly known now as the man who made Rhino run because he beat him like a dog.  He says he hasn’t seen Rhino lately but he knows where he is and that he has gone back to drinking. Storms says Rhino tells everyone he doesn’t drink and if there’s one thing Storm hates worse than an alcoholic, it’s a liar and when you put the two together, you get Rhino.  Storm says he is going to put something together tonight called a Cowboy Pub Crawl.  He is going to go down to all the bars and he’s going to find Rhino and he’s going to find him drunk and once again he’s going to kick his a**.  Storm stops the vehicle and asks people on the street if they have seen Rhino.  We see Storm in bar after bar looking for Rhino. He then gets a phone call and says “that’s the scuzziest bar around” but says he will go there.  When Storm goes through the door, the bouncer tells Storm every time he comes in he starts a fight and he beats up wresters and midgets. He tells Storm he has to get out of the bar. Storm asks if he can keep his beer and as he starts out he has a man on either side of him.  One of them says something to him and Storm hits the guy and knocks him down. The bouncer has Storm and is shoving him out of the bar, pushing him through the door and out onto the sidewalk.  Then the screen shows TO BE CONTINUED...

Unfortunately. It was entertaining watching Storm in and out and around all of the bars he could find.  The unfortunate part is that TNA appears to be stuck on not only making Rhino a fall guy but a drunk as well.

We are in Jim Cornette’s office with Cornette, Matt Morgan, Kurt and Leticia Cline with microphone. Cornette tells Morgan to go stand outside the door because they don’t need any more trouble in the office and he will call Morgan if he needs him. We then see Karen sitting in a chair. Kurt goes into some drivel about what a lady Karen is and Cornette tells him that her face is about as phony as a get well card from an undertaker and reminds Kurt she didn’t look like a lady last week but Karen jumps out of the chair and starts screaming at Cornette. Kurt tells Karen to sit down and shut up. Kurt tells Cornette it isn’t fair that he is in a handicap match, that he should have at tag team partner and Cornette tells him he is going to get a partner but not tonight because the match has already been set. They are going to have a lottery next week to decide who Kurt’s partner is going to be for one of the matches he has to defend his titles.  Cornette then tells Kurt he needs to prep his delicate lady flower for the match coming up as Karen goes off on another screaming fit grabbing Cornette by the jacket.

I don’t care what lines Cornette has to work  with, he can come up with some of the best deliveries.  And it’s a good thing.  Otherwise this little skit would have been flushable.

We then go to the promo of Black Reign talking to Wildcat Chris Harris and then we see parts of the match of the two of them at Hard Justice and Black Reign says there will be a match at No Surrender where he will again make the Wildcat bleed.

Ron The Truth Killings versus Eric Young

The Truth is not met with the usual wild enthusiasm of the audience when he enters the arena.  In fact, he gets many thumbs down from fans.  Eric, on the other hand, is greeted with audience approval.

The bell rings and the audience is one hundred and ten percent behind Eric.  The Truth doesn’t like the audience reaction. The Truth takes swing at Eric, but Eric ducks and The Truth goes into the ropes. Eric lays several fists on and about The Truth’s head before taking him by the arm to send him across the ring.  The Truth makes a switch and Eric goes into the opposite ring post.  Eric goes up over the top rope and lands on the apron. As The Truth comes after Eric, Eric delivers a shoulder block into the abdomen of The Truth doubling him over. The Truth comes after Eric again and Eric slides under The Truth and ends up behind him back in the ring. A well-placed forearm by Eric sends The Truth out onto the floor.  Eric takes a running dive through the ropes and lands on The Truth sending him back to the floor. The audience goes wild and the cheers for Eric get louder. Eric turns and to pick The Truth up off the floor and we go to the commercial break.

Back from commercial break, Eric tosses The Truth into the ring post but The Truth goes up in the air, comes down behind Eric and does a flip.  Eric comes after him with a clothesline, but The Truth ducks the arm by doing the splits. The Truth comes back up off the floor and going high to nail Eric with a leg. The Truth nails Eric with a fist and several more after Eric is down on the mat.  The Truth sends Eric across the ring into the corner post and goes after him, hitting Eric with a forearm.  Tenay interrupts to tell the audience that Dustin Rhodes is in the Impact Zone. The Truth takes Eric down with a neck breaker and the camera pans the audience to show Dustin Rhodes sans makeup and looking like one of the good old boys standing in the back with the audience.  Eric is down in the ring and The Truth goes for the pin, getting a two count. Eric and The Truth exchange fists as Eric gets to his feet. Eric sends The Truth into the ropes but The Truth comes off with a highflying fist to take Eric down. With Eric down in the ring, The Truth goes out onto the floor near the announcer’s table to grab a chair before heading back into the ring.  Eric is just getting to his feet as the referee tries to take the chair away from The Truth. The Truth pushes the referee and Eric comes off the ropes with a drop kick knocking the chair into The Truth and sending The Truth down to the mat.  Once again the audience roars its approval as Eric starts pounding on The Truth with a series of fists. Eric picks up the chair that is still in the ring.  As he swings it back over his head to take a shot at The Truth, the referee snatches the chair from Eric’s grasp. The Truth is back to his feet and takes a swing at Eric but Eric ducks and comes back with an elbow to The Truth and follows up with a clothesline.  Eric goes for the pin, but only gets a two count.  Eric goes out onto the apron and climbs the ropes to the top turnbuckle.  The Truth has managed to get the chair again and he pushes the referee toward Eric.  Eric jumps off the turnbuckle to get out of the referee’s way and as he hits the mat, The Truth takes him out with a chair to the head before sliding the chair back out of the ring.  Eric is down as The Truth delivers a leg drop , goes for the pin and gets the win. The Truth asks for the microphone and tells the audience he would like for them to stand up and give an iMPACT welcome to Jones. Jones comes down the ramp shaking some type of can in his hand. The Truth has the cameraman come into the ring and tells everyone this is a great sports center moment as Jones spray paints his name on Eric’s back.  He spells Pac. 

Before the match began, Tenay tells us that Eric got laid out last week by the newly formed tag team of The Truth and Pacman Jones.  I know you get paid to say what they tell you to say Mike but perhaps you could tell the writers TNA fans are not buying it.  There is no tag team.  Jones cannot wrestle.  We all know that.  Even if TNA didn’t tell us about it, the national news did tell us what his football contract does not allow.  I don’t know if Jones can’t spell Pacman or if he just ran out of room because the word  PAC was spray painted on Eric’s back.  I do know there was no reason for Jones to show up in the iMPACT Zone tonight.  And I can’t believe this is how they are using a talent like Ron Killings.  On a positive note, they didn’t let Jones open his mouth.

So what could have been a good match turned into an unfunny farce.  Eric and The Truth deserve better matches than this.

We go to the back with Jeremy  who is accosted by Tomko and AJ who are looking for Samoa Joe. Tomko and AJ go off looking for Samoa Joe and Team 3D shows up.  Brother Ray says they have something to say.  He says that sometimes reality slaps you in the face and has a way of making you humble.  He then recounts their match at Hard Justice and says The Steiners punched them in the face and made them humble.  Ray says that The Steiners are one of the greatest tag teams of all time, that Team 3D have been jerks, and in reality they are glad that Scott Steiner survived his injury in Puerto Rico. Ray says they need to apologize to everyone for the way they have been acting and they are going to refocus themselves on the tag team titles and to be the team that everyone has come to know and love. Brother Devon steps in and says Ray is basically trying to say that they are sorry.

I know they didn’t mean it but it is nice to see the big boys grovel now and then.

Back from commercial break, Tomko and AJ are in front of Joe’s dressing room door.  They have a minor verbal altercation before Tomko tells AJ he is going in.  Tomko opens the door, Joe grabs Tomko and the door is slammed shut leaving AJ outside. Joe eventually opens the door and AJ asks him if Tomko is in there before taking off and running with Joe right behind him.

As Tenay and West are talking about the match everyone has been waiting for, AJ runs down the ramp with Joe hot on his heels. They run around the ring and AJ slides into the ring and tries to take a kick at Joe, but Joe has him by the leg and pulls him back out onto the floor. Joe sends AJ into the guardrail before tossing AJ back into the ring, sending him across the ring and taking AJ out with a hard clothesline.  Tomko is now coming down the entrance ramp taking off his shirt and heading for Joe in the ring. Tomko is on the apron facing Joe and, you guessed it, Christian comes in behind Joe with steel chair in hand. Christian hits Joe and sends him to the mat.  Tomko picks up Joe and delivers a choke slam.  We have a three against one in the ring and Christian sets up and delivers a conchairto.

Joe got out of bed for this? 

The only reason TNA fans have been waiting for this final match must be to see The Steiner Brothers shut Kurt’s wife up.

Jeremy is in the back with the Angles just in time to hear Karen whine while Kurt tells Karen he has it covered. Kurt tells Jeremy not to get married.

Back from commercial break for the final match of the evening, we get a James Mitchell promo directed at Abyss.  He tells Abyss Judas Messias is about to be unleashed on the world.

This is an “I can’t wait” thing.  I’ve missed Mitchell delivering evil throughout the iMPACT Zone.  I hope Judas is as good as the hype leads us to believe he is.

Handicap Tag Team Match

The Steiner Brothers versus Kurt accompanied by Karen Angle

Scott faces off with Kurt, the bell rings, and Scott takes Kurt back into the ropes. Clean break by Scott, the men come together, Kurt gets Scott in headlock, and Scott knocks Kurt back into the ropes and hits him with a shoulder block sending Kurt down to the mat. The referee backs Scott up so Kurt can get to his feet. As Scott approaches Kurt, he hits Scott sending him down to the mat. Forearm to Scott’s face, Kurt tries to send Scott into the ropes but Scott switches the move and sends Kurt across the ring, catching him with a hard forearm on the way back out before giving Kurt an elbow drop.  Scott does his standard pushups and Kurt bails out of the ring with Karen yelling at him.

Back from commercial break, Scott sends Kurt head first into the top turnbuckle before delivering two chops.  Rick takes this opportunity to take a bite out of Kurt. Scott delivers a knee to Kurt, taking him down, then delivers a boot before tagging in Rick.  Rick delivers a series of fists to Kurt, then picks him up to send him across the ring.  Kurt makes the switch and sends Rick into the ropes giving Karen a chance to grab Rick’s leg. Rick makes a grab for Karen and gets her by the hair before Kurt hits Rick from behind. Kurt delivers a series of fists to Rick keeping him down on the mat.  Kurt keeps the referee busy so that Karen can work on Rick. Scott goes around the ring after Karen before going back to his own corner.  Kurt takes Rick down to the mat and goes for the pin, but doesn’t get the count. Kurt gets Rick in a headlock but the crowd is behind Rick. Rick gets up to his feet, but Kurt tries to take him back down.  Rick takes Kurt down with a belly-to-belly suplex before tagging Scott back into the ring.  Scott comes in to deliver two large forearms to Kurt then delivers a belly-to-belly suplex of his own. Scott has Kurt in the corner and delivers a series of hard chops to his chest before another belly-to-belly suplex is delivered.  Scott goes for the pin but only gets a two count. Scott gets Kurt up on his shoulders as Rick climbs up on the top turnbuckle.  Karen comes around the ring and gets Rick by the foot as Kurt gets a flip and rolls up Scott but doesn’t get the pin.  Rick is chasing Karen around the ring as Kurt delivers the angle slam to Scott in the ring. Kurt goes for the cover and the pin but Scott powers out. As Scott gets to his feet, Kurt sends him over the top rope with a forearm.  Karen with Rick still chasing her climbs into the ring and as they run through the ring, Rick takes Kurt down with a double sledge on his way by. It’s now Rick and Kurt in the ring.  Kurt sends Rick into the rope but Rick comes off the rope and power slams Kurt to the mat. Rick goes up on the top rope and delivers a flying bulldog to Kurt. Karen gets up on the apron to distract the referee as Team 3D enters the ring and going after Rick and delivering the 3D before exiting the ring. Kurt goes for the cover and gets the three count. Team 3D is back in the ring to work on Scott and Rick after the match is over. Team 3D sets the table up in the ring and Ray climbs up on the top turnbuckle as Devon hands Rick up so that Ray can send Rick through the table.

At least I know why Karen Angle was hired.  TNA hired her as a screamer.  I have a mute button.  It takes away from Tenay and West calling the match but it does work to shut out the constant screeching. Another almost good match sent the wrong direction by TNA. 

I got up extra early this morning to get this recap put together for this site.  I had an ulterior motive for getting up early.  I wanted to read other recaps of this particular iMPACT and get a feel for how other TNA fans were reacting.  I only found a couple of recaps that had not been copied over and over, but the results were all the same.  If I was unaware of TNA and decided that I wanted to start watching iMPACT and read these recaps, I wouldn’t bother.  There was not one positive recap anywhere to be found. Why TNA hasn’t figured this out is beyond me.  I do not feel like giving a suspended football player any free publicity yet TNA has tried to make the suspended football player a star player.  It’s not working, get out of this guy’s overpriced contract if you can, and use the cash you are saving to push the talent TNA has sitting backstage.  Do the same thing with Karen Angle and concentrate on the women on the roster who actually have wrestling talent.  I have been seeing references to TNA being referred to The Angle Show and I understand why.  Angle may have some star power but no one wants to watch a full hour of Kurt and company. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TNA iMPACT !! / THURSDAY AUGUST 16 / PLAY-BY-PLAY ANALYSIS AND COMMENTARY BY SASSY
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