John looked round the hotel lobby searching for the mystery woman he was waiting for. She intrigued him even though he had never met her, only spoken to her briefly on the phone. Normally he wouldn’t have considered sparing her any of his valuable time but something about her voice had compelled him to arrange this meeting.
Unusually for him he had arrived early. He had had Patty clear his diary for the day so that he could spend some time with the woman who had requested an audience with him. Taking a sip from the bottle of Evian he reflected on what he knew about her. He knew she was a fan from the old days, that she had apparently met with the band on quite a few occasions and that her name was Kairen. Somewhere in the dark recesses of his mind her name rang a bell but he couldn’t remember why.
Kairen entered the lobby of the Chateau Marmont five minutes before she needed to be there. After her recent encounters with the members of Duran Duran she hadn’t wanted to spend an hour waiting for him to arrive. She was surprised to see John already waiting for her, leaning nonchalantly against the wall, Evian bottle gripped firmly in his hand. She took a few moments to take in everything about him. He had put a little weight on since the last time that she had seen him but that did nothing to detract from his good looks. The black jeans and t-shirt suited him well, accentuating his new physique. Was the guy really about to hit 40? Shaking her head she dragged her thoughts back to the task in hand. She must focus on the reason for this meeting. Several deep breaths later she had boosted her confidence enough to introduce herself to him.
“Hi John, I’m Kairen Swanson. Thanks for agreeing to meet me.” She could feel herself melting in the warmth of the smile he bestowed on her.
“Hi. Shall we?” John indicated to the relatively private bar area of the hotel. Now he had met her she looked familiar to him but he still couldn’t place where from. She wasn’t one of his previous liaisons; his love of blondes had been well reported. Kairen’s long brunette tresses would probably never have caught a second glance from him, despite the beauty beneath. It was possible that she had been a long past muse of one of the other guys; they had not been so particular about hair colour. But if that was where he knew her from why had she wanted to meet him?
When they were seated in one of the bar stalls the conversation faltered for a short while before they fell into easy chat about John’s new solo career and Kairen’s work as a would-be promoter. He listened to her, enthralled by the deep ambitions that fired in her eyes and by her English accent that brought a twinge of homesickness to him.
Kairen watched him as they chatted. She could see his mind clicking over as to where he had met her before. It had been the same with all of them – they all knew they had met her somewhere before but couldn’t quite grasp where from. The subtle differences were enough to throw them off the scent.
John and Kairen chatted amiably until John’s mobile rang. He pulled it from his pocket, annoyed at the interruption. Checking the small digital screen he saw it was Simon calling. Mentally noting to ring him later John switched the phone off.
“Sorry about that.” He felt a strange need to apologise.
“No problem, he’ll ring you back.” Kairen toyed with the empty coffee cup in front of her. “Simon that is.”
“How did you know that was Si?” He paused his movements, phone halfway into his pocket.
“He said he’d call you, once he’d worked it all out.”
“Worked what out?” a sensation similar to fear sent small shivers down his spine. Who was this girl?
“Why I’m here, meeting all of you one by one.” She looked up at him, smiling a smile warm enough to defrost the mistrust. The reflection of his nervousness showed in his eyes, giving her guilt pangs. She hadn’t meant to worry him, or any of them, but her familiarity had unsettled them all.
“And that’s because..?” He met her eyes trying to read beneath the surface and failing.
“The reformation.” She could see that he was still unsure what she meant. “The reforming of Duran.”
“The reforming of Duran?” He almost choked over the words. “Duran don’t need to reform…they’re still going.” John watched as she laughed at him.
“You know that’s the fifth time I’ve heard that now.” Seeing anger flare in his eyes she curbed her giggles. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have laughed and…” she glanced at her watch “I’ve taken up enough of your time. Thanks for allowing me that.”
“You’re gonna up and leave now? Why?” Her decision to desert him left John feeling alarmingly desolate. No one woman had ever managed to make him feel like that before and it shocked him. A tiny voice kept telling him that he and the guys owed her more than a few hours of time. “Look, stay a while longer.”
Kairen heard the slight note of pleading in his voice and against all her plans sat down again. Surely a few more minutes couldn’t hurt.
“What makes you think you can succeed where others fail?” John signalled the waiter for 2 more drinks. This girl was intriguing him more than ever. He carefully studied her face, hoping to find the key that would unlock the memories he knew were hidden about her.
She smiled at his scrutiny, knowing what he searched for and, at the same time, knowing he probably wouldn’t find it. The desire to tell him was becoming unbearable but she held her tongue. If she told him now it would blow all chances she had of achieving her goal.
“Why shouldn’t I succeed?” She chose the easy option of answering with a question. It gave her a little more time to combat the self-inflicted pressure to own up to everything.
John shrugged in reply. Kairen’s self-conviction and belief held him mesmerised. He and the rest of the band had once had those same strong positive emotions of self worth. Now they were all like strangers. Shaking his head he looked at Kairen. “You must think you have a chance or why bother?”
“That’s for you to work out John.” She rose from her chair, placing a small piece of card on the table and kissing him lightly on the cheek. “When you do…call me.” With those words she rushed out of the hotel leaving him with the two untouched drinks.
John stared at the small card turning it over in his hand. Reaching into his inner pocket he extracted his mobile and dialled Simon’s number.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Simon sat in his London home praying for the phone to ring. He’d tried John earlier but had been cut off. Every time he’d tried after that he was told the phone he was trying to reach was unavailable and that he should try later.
“Stupid git.” Muttering to himself under his breath, he poured himself another glass of red wine. He some how knew that today was John’s meeting with Kairen and he needed to know what had happened. His own meeting with her had left him haunted with images of her face and voice. He’d tried to explain how he felt to Yasmin but she’d just laughed saying it was probably an old flame hoping for a relight, but he knew it was more. When he’d discussed it with Nick they had both said the same thing…they couldn’t get Kairen out of their minds.
The shrill ring of the phone interrupted his thoughts. Snatching the receiver up he took a deep breath. “Hello?”
“Charlie?” John sighed as he heard Simon answer. It had been a long time since the two of them had spoken and the air was still a little strained between them.
“Yeah it’s me…how ya doing?” Simon struggled to find the words to speak to the man that was once closer to him than his own brother. What the hell had happened to them? Whilst they both knew the answer neither would admit to it. “I’m doing ok…you?” Christ we sound like complete strangers John thought. “Charlie, let’s cut the crap. I’m fine, you’re fine...let’s just deal with the damned issues.” His encounter with Kairen had left him with fraught nerves and little patience to bandy false platitudes with anyone.
“Whoa Johnny…you sound like you old self there.” Simon smiled at the all too familiar mood swing from his friend. “The issues then. Kairen Swanson…you met her yet?”
“Yeah she just left. Who the fuck is she Si? She’s familiar but…I don’t know.” John let his confusion out, hoping that Simon could jog his memory if nothing else.
“I dunno. Nick and I are totally confused. She has haunted both of us since we met her. We hoped you’d know.” Disappointment coloured his words. “She’s met all of us now...maybe we should…”
“What meet?” John gave a sarcastic laugh. “You seriously suggesting we should all be in the same room again? For the first time in 12 years? Should I bring my lawyer?” The mere thought of the original five band members being in the same building was enough to make John laugh.
“Ok smart arse you think of something.” Both fell silent as they contemplated the options in from of them, each of them mentally thanking the mystery women for breaking the ice between them.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Kairen looked out from the balcony of her newly acquired beach house, watching the sea mist gather. It had been four days since she had met with John and she had heard nothing from him or any of the others. As the early morning sun tried to break its way through the mist she considered her encounters with each of the band members. She had met them in no particular order but was glad that John had been last.
Nick had been easier to talk to than she had expected. His razor sharp wit and sardonic nasal tone only served to hide a surprisingly caring and insecure nature. Once she had managed to break through the false bravado they had managed a long conversation about art, literature and charitable activities. Nick had instantly jumped to the conclusion that this was the reason behind her desire to reform the band. She had left him a little unsure as to whether this was the true meaning or not, even though she had tried to reassure him that it wasn’t.
There had been few surprises during her meeting with Simon. Kairen found herself massaging his ego and pandering to his obsessive flirting. Numerous offers of sexual promises had been proffered and refused before they had begun to talk normally. When the conversation had started to flow his true intelligence had shown through (tarnished occasionally by innuendoes). They had sat and talked for more than an hour about everything and anything. When she had mentioned her reason for seeing him he had laughed at her asking why she thought she could work miracles. Shortly after that Simon had bade her farewell, leaving her with one more proposition and his hotel room number.
When Kairen met with Andy she was shocked at how much he had changed, not only in looks but in personality as well. She remembered him from his Duran days as being boyish looking with a character to match. Now he looked a lot older than he should, as though the years had worn away his youthfulness and replaced it with disenchantment. Their conversation was stilted through out with Kairen having to drag comments from him. He was reluctant to discuss any of his work since leaving the band or any of his future plans. It was only when she had commented on the possibility of the original five reforming that he became animated. Andy’s initial reaction had been one of anger but then he had become thoughtful before asking her why she wanted it to happen, accepting her answer of it being something she wanted to do easily. The whole meeting had lasted no more than ¾ of an hour, Andy being the one to end it with the excuse of having to meet with his wife. The episode had left Kairen feeling depressed at how the life seemed to have left the guitarist.
It had taken her a while to track down Roger and get him to agree to meet her. The barrier he had formed around himself since 1986 was almost impenetrable. Promises of total confidentiality and no prying had to be made before he finally agreed. Roger had chosen the place for the meeting, a small country pub out in the middle of nowhere. As she had sat opposite him she was amazed at how little he had changed. The hair, eyes and smile were exactly as she remembered them. There had been no beating around the bush or small talk with Roger he had wanted to know her intentions immediately. When he found out what they were he had become melancholy and began reminiscing. His whole demeanour was one of someone who missed his past and wished that he could partake in it again, only was too afraid to let anyone know how he felt. Hope had filled Kairen’s heart as she listened to him talking. Of all the members she really had thought that Roger would be the hardest to convince but not now.
Then there had been John. She wasn’t sure why she had left him until last, maybe it was because he was the keystone to the rest of the band. He was the only one still in some kind of contact with Andy, and even though there had been problems when he had left they were only minor ones. All she waited for now was for one of them to call her and let her know if the wheels had started turning or if they had stalled at the first crossroads.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Andy returned the guitar to its stand, unable to concentrate on the music he was trying to write for thoughts of the girl who had reawakened his memories of Duran. For what seemed to millionth time since his meeting with Kairen he picked up the phone and toyed with the idea of ringing John. Again he placed it back on the table, wondering how one woman could affect him as much as this one had. Determinedly he picked up the phone and punched in the number. The ringing, which jarred at his nerves, seemed to go on forever. Eventually he heard John’s voice at the other end of the line.
“Hello?”
“John it’s Andy.” He waited for some kind of expletive or a berating for the length of time since he had last called.
“Hi Andy, wondered if you’d call. How’s things mate?” At last. John thought relieved that Andy had chosen to call him. He’d spoken to Roger the night before and had been contemplating ringing the missing band member.
“Things were fine, until I met with someone calling herself Kairen. You heard of her?” He plucked at the strings of the guitar he had just put down.
“Yeah I’ve heard of her. Met her a while back. She’s met with Nick, Charlie and Roger too. Wants us to reform.” John looked at the photo in his hand. He had been flicking through some personal pictures when he had stumbled upon one of the band from 1983. Five faces smiled at him from the paper image, a moment of happiness captured forever in print.
“Yeah and like that is ever gonna happen. Doesn’t she realise we don’t talk anymore? Stupid bitch.” He propped the phone under his chin and picked up the guitar. Moving his fingers deftly over the strings he unwittingly picked out the notes to Careless Memories.
“I think she knows that mate. Knows it almost as well as she knows us. Do you remember her from anywhere?” John returned the photo back to the pile in front of him.
“Christ Johnny, there were a lot of pretty faces in them days…how d’ya expect me to remember? There’s only one that sticks out in my mind…” Andy stopped playing as memories came flooding back to him “But she died didn’t she?”
John remained silent for a few seconds. “Yeah, she died.” Disturbing images of an event that changed the lives and line up of Duran Duran flickered through the minds of both men.
“What’ve the others said about this reforming crap then?” Andy was the first to break the quiet that had fallen over them.
“Charlie reckons we should get together…just to try and work out who the hell she is more than anything. Roger and Nick are ok with it…what about you?” He bit down on his bottom lip, gnawing at the soft flesh as he nervously waited for a reply.
“When and where?” The speed at which he replied surprised John. He had expected a little resistance if not total refusal.
“As soon as schedules allow. You coming?”
“Yeah…why not? I wanna know who this woman is, be good to see everyone again too. Just let me know when, I’ll be there.” As he committed himself Andy thought of the repercussions that could arise from meeting with the other members. Since his leaving and the ensuing court case for royalties he had been pictured as the black sheep of the band when all he had really done was fight for what was rightfully his.
“Will do. Look I gotta go. Speak to ya soon mate.” John was anxious to end the call, something was playing on his mind and he wanted to follow his instincts.
“Yeah later mate.”
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
John ended the call with Andy and searched through the photos in front of him. Finding nothing he pulled another box from the cupboard, followed by another until at last he found what he was looking for. The now faded piece of newspaper told in graphic detail the horror story of Maisie Johnson, the fan who had died.
The date had been 4 March 1986. Duran Duran were coming back together after the side projects of Arcadia and Power Station when an incident had occurred at JFK airport as they all arrived to start recording the new album. Some lunatic had decided that they had a grudge against Andy and that the only way to deal with him was to shoot him. Unfortunately as the gun had been aimed at Andy’s head 19 year old Maisie had stepped forward to greet him and had received the full force of the shot, dying a few hours later in hospital.
The shooting had shocked the band more than anything else in their whole career. The strain had become too much for Roger who quit shortly after. Andy had tried to continue working but eventually had quit claiming that the musical differences in the band were too vast after all. The only people who had known the true reason were the band – Andy couldn’t get over the feelings of guilt that someone as young as Maisie had died instead of him.
Looking at the photo attached to the news report John thought he saw similarities between the girl shown and Kairen but they were obviously not the same person.
“Obviously you fool, Maisie died.” He spoke out loud as he carefully folded the scrap of paper and replaced it back in the folder with all the other news cuttings his mother had lovingly saved over the years. “Come on John, let’s get this ball rolling then.” Picking up the phone he dialled Simon’s number and began arranging a time, date and place for the meeting of the band.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Kairen had just about given up hope of ever hearing from the band members again when John had phoned her asking her to meet him at his recording studios. It had been 4 weeks since she had last seen him then out of the blue came the call. Now she sat in her car outside the innocent looking building which housed the studios. For the first time since she had started her quest her nerves jangled. John had not told her why he wanted to see her but had been insistent that they did meet.
Removing the keys from the ignition Kairen got out of the car and slowly made her way to the door. Pushing it open slightly she could hear the unmistakable sound of someone playing bass. She slipped through the door and followed the sound until she found John sitting at the mixing desk.
“Didn’t think you were coming.” He never looked up from his playing as he spoke.
“I told you I would. So…you wanted to see me.” She fiddled with her car keys, watching as he deftly moved his fingers over the strings. “That’s Hey Day isn’t it?” “Yeah it is. Please…sit down.” John placed the bass back onto its stand, finally raising his eyes to meet her gaze as he gestured to the chair opposite him. “Have you heard from any of the others?”
“No. I guessed that you’d all decided I was insane and marked me up as just another psycho fan.” She gave him a small smile as he laughed at her words.
“Normally we would…but you’ve got all of us fascinated. We’re holding a meeting in a couple of days to discuss some things. Don’t build your hopes too high up though…this is the first time in way too many years that we’ll have been together.” And we want to know who you are… John thought.
“Well it’s a start I guess. Where’s it gonna be? Sorry I shouldn’t have asked.” Kairen quickly apologised as a look of annoyance swept over John’s face.
“Don’t push any of this Kairen…it’s harder than you know. A lot of buried wounds have been reopened since you came on the scene. Some more painful than others.” He closed his eyes, as the past became too painful. “Have you ever heard of Maisie Johnson?”
“Yes.” The quietly spoken word made him open his eyes quickly.
“Did you know her?” The answer to his question was written all over her face before he had asked it but he wanted to see if she would be honest with him.
“Yes.” Kairen tried to keep the tears from falling. Somehow she had known that one of them would eventually link her to Maisie but had thought it would be later rather that sooner.
“How?”
“She was my sister. I was with her throughout every one of your tours, following you from stadium to stadium, making the backstage whenever possible, just so that she could try and re-light the flame that Andy had sparked back in ’84. One night of forgotten passion for him, a short lifetime of dreaming for her. None of you guys realised what you did to the girls you shagged, it was just wham bam thank you ma’am to you but to them it was everything. They honestly believed that you loved them, that they could be the next Mrs Taylor, Mrs LeBon, Mrs Rhodes whatever…” She rose from the chair and began pacing the room, letting all the pent up anger out. “Maisie had idolised you guys since the first time she had seen you play, always said that one day one of you would be hers. She had actually wanted Roger but he was too happily married to even notice her. Andy was the one who had latched on to her desperation and he took advantage of it.”
“You must hate him for that.” John took the chance to interrupt her as she paused for breath.
“No. Why should I hate him? She was offering it all on a plate. I don’t even hate the guy who killed her.” She swept her hand through her hair before searching in her pockets for a tissue.
“Now you want us to reform. Why?”
“Because this is what she would have wanted. I know Andy and Roger left because of her dying…she would’ve hated that. It’s something I wanted as well…just to see you guys play live together one more time. Kind of like a tribute to her.” She stopped walking and turned to face him. “You probably think I’m pathetic don’t you?”
“No. I’m surprised you kept this quiet from us all though. You could have used this to try and blackmail us into getting what you wanted but you didn’t.” He smiled at her, noticing that the eyes full of dampness were the same as the ones he’d seen in the paper clipping.
“I didn’t want any of you to know. If you guys reform then I wanted it to be because I’d helped not bribed. Shot that plan to shit haven’t I?” She dropped down into the chair, running her hands through her hair. “All through meeting you guys I managed to keep my mouth shut and now…oh well I gave it a go.”
“Hey even if we don’t do a gig or a cd together you’ve still achieved more than anyone else…you got us all together again, and that’s a major feat.” He moved over and crouched down next to her chair.
“Maybe…” She looked into the deep brown eyes staring up at her, drowning in the concern she saw. The penetrating sound of a bell brought her back to her senses. “Looks like you’ve got company…I’ll leave you to it…let me know how the meeting goes.” Standing she walked to the door, turning to send him a smile before leaving.
“How the hell does she do this to everyone?” John asked himself as the feeling of desertion swept over his body once again as he watched Kairen leave him alone once more.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Nick prowled around the front room like a caged tiger. There was nowhere he’d less like to be than in his own home right now, waiting for his visitors.
Stubbing his cigarette butt out in the ashtray he automatically reached for another and lit it, at the same time fighting off the monumental urge for an alcoholic drink. He needed all his wits about him if he was going to survive the day’s agenda.
“At least you’re safely out of the way.” He spoke to the picture of his smiling daughter that stood on the sideboard. “Why is your dad so damned stupid at times? Huh?” He grinned at the photo, in his mind hearing the 13-year-olds sassy reply.
When John had rung him about arranging a meeting of the original line up Nick had rushed in and said they could use his London home as a meeting place. He had known that Tatjana would be out of the way on another extended holiday with her mother so the place would be private. John had jumped at the idea and they had set a date. Now that it had arrived Nick was not so sure of the brilliance of the suggestion. Problems had arisen almost immediately with Warren when Nick and Simon had told him about the get together. The guitarist had begun to shout about his contract and how he wasn’t going to be shoved out of the group just because they wanted to try and regain their long lost status of the early 80’s. Why couldn’t the guy understand that they were only meeting not actually reforming? Nothing had been planned past that particular day.
Glancing at his watch Nick realised he still had another hour and a half before anyone would arrive. As his stomach grumbled he thought about getting some food, then wondered if he should get some refreshments in for the afternoon. He had hidden all his alcohol not knowing if Andy was still as partial to it as he used to be and wanting to avoid Simon indulging too much; but had never thought about food. Deciding they could eat take away if they got hungry he lit another cigarette. Looking in his packet he noticed there weren’t many left. Had he really smoked almost 20 cigarettes already? Moving back over to the sideboard he removed another packet and placed them on the side ready for when he needed them. The stress of the afternoon was obviously going to require plenty of nicotine back up.
Picking up the remote he switched the stereo system on to the radio. He needed something to distract him. As it came to life Planet Earth greeted him. Listening to the song he had heard and played a million times Nick found himself smiling. They had started off with such good strong intentions but had also been so innocent of the harshness of the business. Now they were all battle worn from the same business they had topped for so many years. The familiar notes faded to be replaced with some more that he recognised. Save A Prayer filled the room, part two of a triple play according to the DJ. Nick sighed to himself. The music had moved from their faltering start to the one song that had really done it for them. Most people said it was Is There Something I Should Know? but as far as the band was concerned it was the song that now played that had brought them to the forefront of the public’s mind. Memories of laughter and unity on the beaches of Antigua and Sri Lanka filled his mind. Moving around the room he plumped up cushions and rearranged photos, waiting to hear what the DJ would throw at him next. Before long the opening notes to A View To A Kill drifted into the room. Nick sat down heavily on one of the oversized chairs, bittersweet emotions invading him as the end of an era played on the radio. The joy of being chosen to record the Bond theme had been marred by the internal wranglings of the band all brought to a head by the murder of one of their fans. Closing his eyes Nick let the music take over his mind.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
“Where the fuck’s my mobile?” Simon shouted to no one in particular. The morning had not gone well for him. Saffron had thrown up all over him as he had tried to get himself ready for the meeting at Nick’s house, then he had lost his wallet and mobile phone.
“Calm down…it’s here.” Yasmin appeared behind him brandishing the offending instrument. “Christ is it really worth all this crap?”
“I don’t fucking know. Shit.” He cursed as he realised the battery on the phone was dead. Yasmin took it off him and connected it to the charger before leaving him alone.
Watching her leave Simon was grateful for the solitude. The thought of seeing the men who he started his career with was the most daunting experience he could think of. Being the front man of the group the media and the fans alike had expected him to be the one without fear of talking, but they were mistaken. Unless he had some alcoholic or narcotic substance to help him, or a microphone to sing into, he found it difficult to connect with people. He had always managed to cover this by flirting with women and playing the wide boy. Coping with press and record companies had become a little easier with time but nothing could prepare him for this. He couldn’t shake the ominous feeling of despair that enshrouded him.
Taking hold of the harmonica that rested on his bedside table Simon tried to remove the stress the only way he knew how to when alone, he began to play the blues. The melancholy music matched his mood yet helped him to focus his thoughts. He was looking forward to meeting with Andy, Roger and John but was nervous about the encounter. The threat of the press getting hold of it was also forefront of his mind. Any publicity would build up false hopes for the fans and that was the last thing they needed right now. Lyrics sprang into his mind as he played so reaching for the ever-present notepad he lay down the harmonica and began scribbling words to fill his time. It was only when Yasmin came back into the room and handed him the now recharged mobile phone that he realised that he had to leave for Nick’s.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Turning the volume up on the car stereo, Andy manoeuvred his jeep into the fast lane. The pounding music pushed all thought of the meeting far from his mind. Whilst not nervous about actually seeing the others the small thrill of excitement that coursed through his body made concentrating on driving difficult.
“Bollocks.” Looking in his rear view mirror he noticed the blue flashing lights of a police car. “This is all I need.” Flicking the indicator switch Andy moved in to the middle lane of the motorway, looking for a space so he could pull on to the hard shoulder, sighing with relief as the car sped past him. Once it had passed him he returned to the fast lane and let the miles flow under the wheels of the car. He was anxious to reach his destination so that once he was there he would have a chance to imbibe in a small amount of alcoholic dutch courage at the hotel before walking to Nick’s house.
He had been amazed that this event was actually coming to fruition. There had been a time, shortly after he had left the band, when this could have happened but with the passing years and the court case for royalties he really had thought his chance had passed. Unbeknownst Simon, Nick and John he had maintained regular contact with Roger, spending many nights sat in the large kitchen of Rogers farmhouse drinking the night away, both of them reminiscing about the high life they had once led.
Seeing the exit he needed Andy carefully moved over to the slip road and left the motorway behind him. As the cd ended he switched it off and moved his thoughts onto what lie ahead of him. The main item to be discussed today was who Kairen Swanson was, and why did she think she had a chance of getting them to reform. A multitude of nameless faces flashed through his mind, images of the girls he had spent amorous moments with. Kairen’s face never fitted any that he could remember, although that wasn’t surprising considering the amount of times he had been too drunk or drugged to know who or what he was doing. With a smile on his face he drove the short distance to the hotel had booked into, deciding to forego the drink and have a shower and change instead, leaving his mind clear to enjoy the reunion that lay ahead of him.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Roger turned the Range Rover into the courtyard of his farm. It had been his morning for the school run and as usual it had taken longer than he had wanted it to. He wondered if he would ever get used to the fact that many of the mums at the school still recognised him 14 years after he had left Duran. They no longer pestered him for his autograph, just enquired how he was enjoying his solitude and if he still saw the others.
Leaving the vehicle parked up he headed for the barn that he had converted into a recording studio, just on the off chance that he ever wanted to get back into the music business. Even though he had never used it for anything other than having a thrash out on his drum kit, it had proved to be a valuable source of income through leasing it to other bands. Duran had used it at one point when the money for the recording of the Liberty album had run out, although he had not charged them the full amount.
Pushing open the heavy doors he noticed that James had obviously been in there the night before with the four of his friends that made up his band. The papers that stood next to the mixing desk were covered in an almost intelligible scribble but were obviously lyrics to a song. Roger picked them up and quickly read through the words. He grinned as he recognised lines taken straight out of Duran tracks. It was only when he had finished reading them that he realised that it was actually a tribute song and the lyrics had been lifted for that reason. Shaking his head in wonderment he returned the papers to the desk and left the studio.
Checking his watch he noticed he had plenty of time before he had to leave to meet with the others. Leaning on the fence of the paddock he watched his 5 horses as they ambled about, stopping occasionally to graze on the hay bales that had been situated at intervals along the fencing. Giovanno had told him he was crazy to purchase the animals from a refuge centre but had realised why he had done it when he had renamed them. Charlie, JT, Sniffer, Froggy and Ringo had soon become a major part of the family, even though the children from the local handicap school were the only ones to ever ride them.
Roger had spent the last few days worrying about the prospect of being in the same room as his former band mates for the first time in many years. It was only as he stood watching the namesakes of the early Duran that he realised that the time was now right for them to get together again, even just for a chat. Whether anything else would come from it he didn’t know. He knew he had the personal strength to walk away from it all again if he needed to. The life he had built for his family was more important to him than any return to fame. He stood for a few minutes longer before turning towards the house to begin preparing for his trip to London.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
John stood in the kitchen of his London home staring out of the window, his mind in turmoil at the position he had put himself in. The main reason for the gathering later that day was to try and discover who Kairen was, something he already knew, but he also knew why she had wanted to keep it to herself. Her desire for the band to reform for themselves not for her was so strong that he didn’t know whether to divulge all to the rest of the band or to keep her secret safe. When he had spoken to her on the phone the night before it had become obvious that Kairen fully expected him to announce her identity; something that he himself knew he should do, but part of him agreed with her that they should only reform because they wanted to not because they felt obligated to. The thought of taking to the stage again with the original line up for a one off concert or maybe even tour appealed to him, although it would have to be under the right circumstances. He had spent a restless night tossing and turning as he weighed up the alternatives.
Grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge John went down to work out in the gym he had had installed into the basement of the house. After a quick warm up routine, he moved over to the treadmill and switched it on. Increasing the pace he pounded step after step drumming out his thoughts as he covered the miles. Even though Kairen had been the one to plant the seed of reunion in each of their minds it had been him who had instigated the meeting for today. He had no regrets in doing so but wished that he had some idea of what lay ahead.
As he ran the music that had been blaring out of his music system fell silent for a moment as the discs changed. Finally Simons voice asked him “Is anybody hungry?” as the Arena album began to play. Listening to the music thoughts of that unique tour came back to him and John made his decision. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Kairen parked the hire car outside Nick’s house, close enough for her to have a view of the front door but far enough away for her to be inconspicuous. After she had spoken to John the day before she had booked onto the first available flight to London, congratulating herself on the fact that she had kept her flat in the capital city. She had arrived in the early hours of the morning and had managed to grab a few hours sleep before leaving to see who actually turned up for the meeting. Despite John’s reassurances that everyone would be there she felt the intense need to see for herself that everything was going to plan still. The only glitch there had been so far was her confession to John that Maisie had been her sister. She had been more thankful than John had realised for the interruption that day which had prevented her from disclosing more of her motives.
She didn’t have to wait long for the band members to start arriving.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
The first ring of the doorbell sent Nick’s stomach into a frenzy of somersaults. Walking slowly to the door he inhaled deeply several times in a vain attempt to settle his nerves. Peering through the spy-hole he was surprised to see Roger stood on the step. He had expected Simon or John to be the first to arrive.
“Hello there mate.” Nick opened the door wide for Roger to enter, smiling as he did so. “It’s good to see you again.”
“Yeah you too.” The drummer moved into the house noting all the little feminine touches here and there which Madeline had obviously instigated. “Am I first?”
“Yep…the others shouldn’t be much longer…although knowing Charlie we could have a couple of hours to wait.” Nick laughed, leading Roger into the lounge.
The two men settled into light conversation about their families as they waited. Before long they were joined by Simon and John, the chat remaining on the same easy level. It was only when the bell went for the 5th time that any kind on tension entered the room. John rose from his chair and went to let the final member of the band in.
“Sorry I’m late…I fell asleep.” Andy looked up at John as the door opened.
“’S okay, at least you’re here.” John tried to hide his true emotions as he gazed at the guitarist. Obvious ill health had played havoc with the once boyish looks, leaving behind a face familiar yet strange at the same time. He wished he could see into Andy’s eyes, to reassure himself that sobriety lay there, but the all too familiar dark glasses prevented any chance of him doing so.
With John leading the way both men made their way into the front room of the house to join the others. After the initial greetings the atmosphere lay heavy with the sound of silence for a few moments before Simon started to giggle.
“What’s so funny Charlie?” Nick’s voice was tinged with laughter, as Simon’s unexpected laughter became infectious.
“Sorry…it’s just that…” The singer struggled to get his words out, taking deep breaths in between to try and calm his mirth. “It’s like we have never fucking met before…all sat here wondering what to say to each other…not wanting to offend.”
“I can’t remember it being this bad when we first met. Mind you all I can remember about that is those damned pink leggings of Simon’s…” Roger joined in with the laughter.
“Oh no…don’t mention those things!” Andy doubled up in his chair, tears rolling down his face from beneath his shades.
“Oh you lot can bloody talk. All I remember is the bloody rainbow of hair colours that greeted me…not to mention the terrible trio of Taylors! You even threatened me.” Simon pointed to Nick as he spoke.
“Me? How did I do that then?” Nick looked shocked at the accusation that was thrown at him.
“You told me if I was another bloody Taylor I could fuck off!” Simon held his sides as his giggles exploded into full-blown hysterics.
John stood leaning against the wall, silently surveying the 4 men. The smile on his face belied the confusion that reigned within him as to whether he should shatter this moment of happiness or allow it to continue. Deep in his mind he knew the answer was to keep quiet and allow the old feelings of unity bring them back together naturally; that way he also got to keep his unspoken promise to Kairen.
The hilarity continued for a while longer before Roger reminded them all why they were there. A sombre quietness filled the room, each man lost in his own thoughts.
“Does it matter who she is?” John’s head snapped up as Simon spoke the same words he had wanted to say.
“What do ya mean Charlie?” Andy looked as confused as the other men in the room.
“I mean, well hell, she got us all into the same room for a start and that’s no mean feat.”
“Yeah we left it way to long…and mostly because of me.” Andy shifted uncomfortably in his seat.
“Bullshit Andy. We were all to blame. John’s the only one who has made any effort to contact any of us…even today is because of him, well sort of.” Nick took a deep drag of his cigarette. The meeting had started off a lot better than he had expected but the tension that had filled the room threatened to bring any signs of friendship tumbling down around their heads.
“Who gives a flying fuck why or how we got here today? All I care about is that we’re here, we’re talking, hell we’re even laughing and joking. We haven’t done this in how many years?” The men in the room turned to look at Roger as he spoke. The compassion in his voice together with the deep emotion etched on his face shocked each of them. Roger had always been the quiet reasoning voice of Duran both in public and in private. “We don’t have to reform, tour, record whatever…the main thing is that we are here talking…together. Admit it, all of you, how many times have you thought this would never happen? Come on be honest.”
Murmurs of agreement filled the room as Andy, Simon, Nick and John all conceded that the drummer was right. As the time had stretched since their last performance it had become more and more difficult to envisage any kind of friendship being salvaged from the wreckage.
“Whenever I think of that last gig, the Live Aid one, it feels like we never let go…like we never said goodbye.” Roger was the first to speak. “I know you guys never quit being Duran an’ all that but Andy and I never had a chance to say goodbye. Just feels like something was wrong, missing almost.”
“I’ve felt the same many times mate.” Andy said quietly. “Is that why you kept going back every so often?”
“Yeah. When John first came out with the idea of a chronological tour last year it appealed to me but I was too afraid to commit to it. Then someone else rejected the idea and it was gone before I had a chance to really examine how I felt.” Roger looked at Nick, knowing that he was the one who had borne the brunt of Warren’s anger when the tour idea had first been aired.
“So what do you suggest then? A one off tour, last chance album, what?” Nick tried to remain calm, all traces of hope were kept locked tightly away.
“No, no more tours. They just…”
“Make your mind up man! One minute your saying the idea of touring was growing on you then the next your saying no way no how.” Simon interrupted.
“Look the thought of touring scares me shitless. Different crowd, different hotel room every night…no thanks. I’m too damned old to start with all that again. The sessions I did with you lot were fun but recording an album means touring it and there’s no way I’ll do that.” Roger looked apologetically round the room. The pressure that he felt was growing, even though he knew he could walk away from it all at any moment. He'd done it once and he could do it again.
“So what then?” John joined into the conversation. Until then he had remained almost silent, letting the others air their views, waiting to see which way the favour lay.
“What about a one off gig?” Andy held his breath, waiting for the derisory comments.
“A one off?” Roger mulled the idea around in his mind.
“Yeah why not? It could work.” The concept of playing one last gig as the original Duran Duran excited Simon. “As long as everyone is up for it.” He looked pointedly at John knowing that the bassist's flourishing career could be an impenetrable barrier. With almost an unnoticeable nod of his head, John committed himself to a one off concert.
Silence filled the room again as they all waited for Roger to make his decision.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Alone in the front room of his home, which also served as a recording studio, Warren paced the floor. Nick had promised to ring him as soon as the meeting ended. Angry thoughts of broken contracts and promises filled his head as he paced. At the first ring he seized the phone.
“Hello?” He listened silently to what the keyboard player had to say before slowly replacing the handset, a wide smile spreading across his face.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
From her vantage point Kairen had a perfect view of Nick’s front door. Hours after she had seen it close behind Andy she watched it opened as Roger left. He was closely followed by Andy and Simon, who stood for a few moments talking on the pavement before driving off separately. It was another hour before John finally emerged from the doorway and drove away.
She sat for a few minutes then she turned the key in the ignition before answering her mobile as it began to ring.
“Hello?”
“You should always check your mirror before pulling out dear. Your place or mine?” Looking behind her she saw John sat in his car which was now parked behind hers.
“My place is closer than yours, you follow me.” She clicked off the phone, franticly trying to calm her heart that had started to beat wildly in her chest.
The drive to her flat was thankfully short and before long John was seated on her sofa whilst she made them both a drink.
“How did you know I was there?” She handed him his coffee and sat on the chair opposite him.
“I saw you on the way in. Knew you couldn’t keep away. Don’t worry the others didn’t recognise you.” He laughed as a worried look spread over her face. Try as he might he couldn’t stop staring at her. The deep natural seductiveness of her brown eyes and the fullness of her lips as she unknowingly licked them awoke his tired senses.
“Thank God for that then.” She looked up at him breaking the scrutiny that he bestowed on her. “Did you tell them?”
“No. There was no need to.” John stifled a yawn. “Sorry it’s been a long day.”
“Yeah tell me about it.” She smiled at him. “So what happened then?”
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
