You use to tell me how much you loved me as you put me to bed. You tucked me in, and told me that everything would be ok. You told me that I would never get hurt, you would always protect me and look over me.
I remember how you would play with me. You would get on the floor with me and play for hours. You would make me laugh at your silly faces.
When I was upset, you would wipe my tears, and hold me and tell me everything is ok.
I watched you from above, as you made a Birthday cake, on what would have been my third Birthday. I watched you as you sat in the chair by the table, alone. You were so upset, crying out to Mommy and me. I saw you staring at the cake you just made. full of tears, lost in thought. How I could since your rage you had, and how you could not understand, why Mommy and I, had to die.
He was drunk daddy. He just lost his wife of 34 years to cancer. He did not mean to hurt Mommy and me. He lives with that everyday now. It tortures him as he sits in jail, all he can do is think about how he destroyed a family, he couldn't handle the emotions that he had, he turned to beer to try and drown his sorrows away. I don't think he knew what he was doing as he got into his car after a whole night of drinking at the bar.
I watch you sit on the floor in my room, holding my toys as if it were me. I watch you cry and plea to God to bring me and Mommy back to you. I watch you curl up with Mommy's pillow, it smells like her. sometimes you close your eyes and just imagine and pretend that we are in the other room, but we are not. And that hurts you more.
Daddy, I am here, when you wake up in the middle of the night crying. You are not alone like you think you are. I am the one that is tucking you in. I am the one that is looking over you and making sure you are safe. I am the one that tells you every night that I love you, From heaven. Daddy, Sleep. Mommy and I are here. We love you.
