From: barelyhere@email.msn.com Subject: Coast of Marseilles 2 Date sent: Tue, 10 Jun 1997 07:38:20 -0400 From: barelyhere@email.msn.com Subject: Coast of Marseilles 2 - 1-9 DATE: May 21, 1997 TITLE: Coast of Marseilles, Book 2 Waiting for the Lone Gunmen COAST OF MARSEILLES 2 Waiting for the Lone Gunmen 11:00 am Coast of Palma Girard met Dana and company as they boarded the yacht. His uneasy look concerned her. "Girard, is there something wrong?" Dana asked growing anxious. "Can I speak with you downstairs?" He asked, motioning for her to precede him. Dana nodded and turned to Samantha. "Can you settle the children in their rooms? They may want to watch television. Fox and I need to talk to Girard." She said lightly, not wanting to alarm Samantha. "Sure, is there something wrong?" Samantha asked, her eyebrows furrowed. "I'm sure it's nothing." Dana assured her with a smile as they walked into the salon. "Mulder, can you join us?" Dana asked as she made her way to the stairs. Mulder nodded and followed them down the stairs to Girard's quarters. When they reached the quarters Girard opened the door allowed them to enter and closed the door behind them. "Have a seat." Glenda's said from the sofa where she was reading. "Girard, is there something wrong? You're making me a bit nervous." Dana said taking a seat next to Glenda. Mulder sat next to her and leaned back crossing his legs and putting his arm protectively on the back of the sofa slightly circling Dana's shoulders. "I received a transmission from my contacts this morning. Seems the project is in the process of moving again. The location isn't clear, and it looks like they are moving back to the states. They've seen crates loaded on ships bound for Florida. My sources tell me there's an abandoned marine research facility off the coast on a small island. They believe the project will set up disguised as a privately run marine biology research facility. The island is far enough off the coast that access will not be easy, and they will be able to monitor the island and surrounding waters for intruders." Girard handed Dana and Mulder a map of the coast of Florida. "The circled area is the island where they are bound. I asked my contact to notify Bill's father alerting him of their movement. I don't want his life to be in danger, and we may need his assistance." Girard noticed Dana's change in expression as he mentioned Bill's father. "They told me the Consortium is desperately looking for Samantha and Katie. They have issued a *dead or alive* reward for her. I think it would be wise to keep her on the boat until you have completed your mission. My sources assure me they have no idea where she is, but they have distributed her picture along with Katie to their contacts and bounty hunters. They're afraid she can expose the group with her knowledge of the project and those in charge." Girard looked at Dana then Mulder. He could see the anger and fear in Mulder's eyes. Mulder withdrew his arm from the back of the sofa, and sat forward resting his head in his hands. Dana could read his body language, even after all these years. "Mulder, don't worry, we've taken every precaution we possibly can, I don't think they will find her. We'll just stay out of sight until we have to go back to Marseilles and pick up the Gunmen. We can cruise in open sea for a few days." Dana said, softly putting her hand on his back to reassure him and calm his fear. "I can't let them take her again, I'll die protecting her if I have to. I'll kill them all, personally, before I'll allow it." He vowed not raising his head. "I know, don't worry, we have successfully eluded them for over a month. She'll have to stay out of sight whenever we're in port. It'll be okay, you'll have to trust me. Girard is very reliable in keeping us safe." Dana said confidently, leaning close to Mulder's hidden face. Mulder thought for a moment, back to a time when "you're the only one I trust" was his solemn vow. But now after years of trusting no one other than himself, trusting wasn't easy. He dropped his hands, and looked at her from his bent position. "Okay, I trust you." He said, with a sigh, "but don't ask me *not* to worry, it's my nature to be paranoid remember?" He asked with a wry smile. Dana sat back and patted him on the back and moved her hand in soothing circles as a gentle reassurance she had calmed his fears for the moment. She knew how difficult it would be for Mulder to trust again, even her. This time, she would not let him down whatever it took, she would gain his trust again. She looked at Glenda, wanting to quickly defuse the tension in the room -- most of it radiating from the man next to her. "Have you planned dinner for tonight?" Dana asked removing her hand from Mulder's back as she looked at Glenda. "No, I hadn't planned anything special. Do you have a suggestion?" Glenda asked, realizing what Dana was attempting to do. "I thought we might have a cookout under the stars, the kids love to eat outside. Do we have enough provisions for the next couple of days? If so, we can set sail now if you want Girard." Dana said looking from one to the other. "Yes, we stocked up when we were in Marseilles. And a cookout would be fun." Glenda agreed with Dana's reason for changing the subject so abruptly. Though she didn't know the man seated next to Dana very well, she could see his devotion to his sister, and she was sure he felt the same for Dana and the children. "I've checked the weather reports and for the next couple of days, it looks like we have clear sailing. But there's a front moving in after that, and it promises rain maybe a bit of rough seas. We should try and dock in a harbor while it passes through. I don't want to be caught in open sea in a bad storm." Girard stated. "That will be fine. If you would like to navigate us out of the area, I will sail tonight for a while so you can take a break." Dana said rising from her seat followed by Mulder as they made their way to the door. "Glenda, I'll check on the kids and be back in a bit to help you prepare for dinner." Dana said from the door allowing Mulder to exit in front of her. Glenda nodded. Dana closed the door and followed Mulder down the hallway to the stairs. Will, Sarah, and Katie were watching Star Wars on the VCR when Dana and Mulder walked into the salon. The kids didn't notice them when they entered the room. "Aren't Will and Sarah a little young to watch that?" Mulder questioned. "It's Will's favorite. Wait until he challenges you with his light saber." Dana chucked. She remembered the challenge between Bill and her young son not so long ago. It caused her a moment of sadness. She hoped Will would bond with Mulder as well as he did with Bill. Bringing her attention back to the present, she looked at Samantha wanting to gain her attention without alerting Katie to any unnecessary worry. Samantha looked up with questioning eyes. Dana motioned her head toward the outer deck and Samantha got up to follow them outside. "What's wrong? Are Katie and I in danger?" She asked apprehensively. Dana sat down in a chair and waited as Mulder and Samantha sat down on either side of her. Turning to her left, Scully studied the anxious young woman before she spoke. "Samantha, I don't want you to be alarmed, everything will be fine." Dana explained calmly. "It seems the project is moving again. There is an island off the coast of Florida used for marine biology research. Girard believes the island will yield them a tighter security advantage to prevent further mishaps." She looked at Mulder who was attempting to act equally as calm. An endeavor for which she was very grateful, not wanting to frighten Samantha. "Girard told us a few minutes ago the Consortium has issued a manhunt for you and Katie." Dana heard Samantha gasp and her eyes widened. "Samantha, don't worry they have to come through me before they can touch you." Mulder said defiantly. Samantha smiled at her brother believing he would indeed protect she and Katie which made her relax a bit. "I want to reassure you of Girard's capabilities Samantha -- he *is* one of the best. Mulder and I are confident you'll be safe. But, we don't want you to go on shore until we're safely home." Dana explained, moving her eyes from Sam to Mulder and back to her again.. Samantha seem to calm a bit, but tears filled her eyes. Mulder moved next to her and took her hand. "Samantha, we are going to stop this, and make sure the future is happy for all of us. I promise." He said gently. The apparent emotions on Samantha's face confused Mulder, but before he could question her she simply said. "Home. I.....I can't believe I'm so close to being home again. To....to see Mom." Her speech disappeared as tears overtook her ability and she started to cry. Mulder gently pulled her into his embrace mumbling soothing words of reassurance to her everything would turn out okay. "I don't remember what she looks like." Samantha said between sobs as she drenched the front of Mulder's shirt. He never let her go as if reassuring himself, as well as her, that they would be safe and a happy reunion would take place. "I'm going to check on the kids." Dana said quietly locking eyes with Mulder to let him know she wanted to allow him time to speak to Samantha alone. He nodded with an appreciative silent message that seemed to be present again between them. Samantha continued to weep softly allowing years of emptiness spill out of her and all over her brother. "Fox, you don't know how many times I've dreamed about seeing her. At first, I could remember her face, but as the years dragged on, I only dreamed of a faceless person. After a while, the only face I remembered was yours. You were my hope, but I never stopped missing her and Dad." She said in a quiet voice between the abating tears. "I'm sorry, I don't have a picture of Mom with me." Mulder wished he had carried other family pictures than Samantha at that moment. The coldness of his childhood trained him that no one was close to his heart except her. Reminding him she was gone from his life, but not from his mind as long as he had a reminder close to his heart that he would find her one day. They couldn't take that from him as they had so viciously ripped her away, leaving him to search for her in years to come. "She has missed you all these years. She was never the same after you left -- none of us were. She and Dad divorced in my teens, unable to bear the burden of losing you." Mulder ran his hand over her hair almost like a father with a child. "I'm not sure how much Mom knows about everything that's happened to you, but it was Dad's decision to allow you to be taken. She hated him for it, even after he died." Mulder explained as Samantha she became quiet resting in her brother's comfortable embrace. "Dana told me a lot of what happened when you were a child, Fox. It must have been as much a prison as mine. That's why I don't want to lose you again, I couldn't bear it. Since I've tasted the freedom Katie and I have shared with Dana for the last month, I would rather die than return to them." Samantha spoke softly, but with conviction as if gaining strength from his closeness. He lifted her from his chest and looked into her eyes. "I swear to you Samantha Mulder, I will not allow them to ever take you from me again. The years I spent after you left were too empty and loveless to allow you to slip away from me. We will fight this together and *we will win*! The truth will be known. I not only have the confidence in myself, but Dana is a formidable woman when it comes to accomplishing her goal. And her goal is not only to keep you safe, but our children as well." He thumbed away her tears. "You have to know and trust that both she and I would fight to the death to keep them from harm." He spoke with confidence and smiled thinking of the tigress in the other room watching over her young. Samantha broke into a smile wiping the rest of the tears from her eyes as if she was assured of her protection. She felt very fortunate to be cared for and surrounded by people who loved her so much. "She loves you Fox." "I know," he said almost shyly, "I've missed her these years we've been apart. I've harbored resentment toward her, especially when I found out about Will and Sarah. I understand to a point, why she did what she did and all the old feelings have been revived. But right now the reunion is new and I can't guarantee what will happen when the 'new wears' off and reality hits me. I do love her, but she's hurt me, and I still have to work through the feelings mixed up in my heart and mind. I'm torn between wanting to hug her and shake her at the same time." Mulder said, hearing his words echo from his head and heart. "Fox, you don't have to rush things. I can tell when you are with her that you want to recapture the bond between you. She lost her husband not long ago, and she is still working through the pain. I can see how hard it is for you to keep your hands off her, and I know it is none of my business, but let her come to you. She wants to reassure you she isn't rejecting you, and that she loves you. But she still has Bill's death and memory to work out for herself. Women have emotions you can't even begin to understand." Samantha explained trying to be sensitive to his ego, but wanting him to understand the pain Dana also was going through. He sighed a bit, "I'll try. Yes, it's hard for me not to be drawn to her. I've dreamed about it, and longed for her too long. But I will admit, I do have unresolved hurt that I need to work out before we move to the next level of our relationship. Last night Will was the only barrier between us. It was all I could do to hang on to control when she started whispering in my ear and kissing me. The memories of old feelings I had for her came back in full force." Mulder reliving the night before and the feelings that had been awoken as Dana had cradled him in her slight frame. He smiled to himself in anticipation but also realizing Samantha was right. Mulder looked toward the salon, then back to Samantha, and said with a chuckle. "I'll never understand the female mind -- especially Scully's." He nodded his head in affirmation. "Your right, we don't need to rush things. I'll try to take your advice Sam. I can't promise how long, but I will *attempt* to let her come to me." He said with an almost pained look forming on his face. 'So close, and yet so far.....' He thought to himself. Samantha chuckled at his discomfort. She knew these next few days were going to be interesting, but she also knew the intense feeling between them wouldn't go without resolve for long. "I think they have a lot of cold water readily available Fox. Or you could just jump in the ocean when your hormones need to be cooled. In fact brother, I will push you overboard if needed." Samantha assured him with a wicked little smile and lifted eyebrow. Mulder moaned, rolling his eyes towards the heavens, as if asking for strength in the torturous task he thought impossible when close to Dana. Mulder felt relaxed and comfortable, sharing this intimate subject with his sister. It was like a bond that couldn't be broken, no matter how many years they had been apart. "I've missed you Sam. It's so good to have you back." He smiled lovingly, and pulled her into a hug again, wanting to reaffirm the reality of his beloved sister. "I missed you too, Fox. I'm glad we have a whole future to share." She said as her emotions threatened to cause tears to flow -- this time, tears of joy. ********************* Washington DC Lone Gunmen Office "We need to contact Walter Skinner for Mulder." Byers said to his two companions who were already packed and set to leave on their journey to the other side of the ocean. Frohike was dressed in black pants with a black shirt and vest. "Don't you think you are taking this a little far Frohike?" Byers asked, taking in the dark look Frohike donned himself as if he were James Bond. "You don't like my traveling clothes?" Frohike asked, looking at his attire. Byers hung his head and shook it, resigning himself to the long trip ahead of them. "I could hack into the E-Mail system at the Bureau and leave him a message." Langly suggested. "That might work. You can leave him a message to meet me and I can fill him in on the details." Byers agreed. Langly sat down at his computer and began typing series of numbers and codes. "I'm in. It's too easy to do this. They should hire us to prevent such an easy breach of security." He stated still typing consecutive codes to reach the assistant director. "What do you want to tell him?" Langly asked pausing while Byers thought. "I'll meet him at the Reflecting Pool in one hour." Byers stated. Langly began to type in the message. When he finished he sent the message and logged off. "I guess we all should be leaving." Byers said picking up his bag. Frohike have you made a route plan?" He asked. "Yes, I am flying out of Dulles to Atlanta, then catching a flight from there this evening." He answered zipping his travel bag. "Langly, where are you leaving from?" Byers asked. "Washington National in...." he looked at his watch, "in an hour and a half. I better get going." He said as he picked up his bags and walked toward the door. "We'll see you in a couple of days at the airport where Mulder will meet us." Byers instructed him as he opened the door to leave. Langly nodded his head and closed the door behind him. "I should be leaving soon too, my flight to Atlanta leaves in a couple of hours. I don't want anyone to follow me, so I'll take the long route to the airport." Frohike said getting into this James Bond undercover operation. "Very well, we will rendezvous in two days. Be careful." Byers said shaking Frohike's hand. Frohike picked up his bags and heaved them over his shoulder with a grunt. "What do you have in those bags?" Byers asked noticing the discomfort as he slung it over his shoulder. "Surveillance equipment, you never know what you may see in exotic places." He said as he displayed a wicked smile. Byers rolled his eyes as Frohike exited the building, closing the door behind him. He hoped Frohike would behave himself around Dana. They had enough problems without having to fish Frohike out of the sea. Byers looked at his watch and picked up his bags, ready to meet A.D. Skinner in just under and hour. He walked to the door and looked around making sure everything was secured for their absence. Satisfied, he turned on the alarm system, turned off the lights, and pulled the door closed locking it, and throwing the different dead bolts into place. He looked around satisfying his paranoid nature that he hadn't been observed. ***************** "Yes." The man asked as an exhale of smoke escaped his lips. "They have left sir, do you want us to follow them?" The man asked. "Yes, don't let them out of sight. Your life depends on it." The voice said with a pause as he inhaled another puff of smoke. "Report back to me when you have established their destination." The voice said, and then a click signified he had hung up. ***************** Byers stood nervously in front of the Reflection Pool hoping Skinner had received his message. He checked his watch again, less than 10 minutes remained before he had to leave. He looked around again trying to spot the man he needed to speak with. A few moment later he spotted the ramrod straight ex-marine as he strolled across the lawn toward the Reflecting Pool. Byers walked swiftly to close the gap between them. "You have a message for me?" Skinner asked not bothering with introductions. "My colleagues and I are on our way to meet Mulder. He didn't go into details, but he wanted you to know that he was safe and from what I understand he is with Dana Scully." Byers said looking at Skinner and then surveying the area for intruders to their private conversation. "I see. I am aware of people searching for all of them. Do you know if they have his sister Samantha?" Skinner asked scanning the area. "No, all I know is Mulder received a letter from Dana Scully a few days ago asking for his help and uhm......" He paused wondering if he should reveal the rest of his news. Skinner looked at Byers with a raised eyebrow. "Yes, is there something else?" He asked narrowing his eyes behind his glasses. "Well, it seems Mulder has a set of uhm......twins that Agent Scully hadn't told him about." Byers said looking down at his feet feeling the guilt again that had plagued him for so long. Skinner huffed a laugh and raised his head up to the sky. "I never could keep those two out of trouble. So that is the misunderstanding they had before Scully left. "I wonder if anyone else knows about this?" He mumbled mostly to himself. He was more afraid for the little ones rather than Scully and Mulder, if the Consortium knew they shared offspring. He let out a sigh, buried his hands in his pockets and looked at Byers. "Is there anything I can do for you? You know they are being sought by a part of the government that spans the world don't you? They are in a consider amount of danger." Skinner stated with a tight look on his face, concerned that additional innocent lives could be in possible danger. "No, but we are taking precautions as we travel. Even that can't be fool proof. If you hear anything, this is a secured access code to send a message. I will check it daily from where we are." Byers handed Skinner a piece of paper with a series of numbers printed on it. Skinner took it and read the information, then slipped it inside he jacket pocket. "I can't tell you where we are going, for security reasons, just in case we're being followed." Byers said almost apologetically. "I understand. I will contact you if I hear anything of use to you. Tell Mulder and Scully I look forward to seeing them again." He said with a stoic look not wanting to reveal the fear he felt for the fugitives sought by powerful forces. "Don't be fooled, these people you are dealing with are extremely dangerous. They have no concern for human life if it means exposure of their agenda." Skinner said as he turned to leave Byers. Byers nodded his head in confirmation and moved off in the opposite direction, parting without another word. In the distance a man watched them as he threw his still lit cigarette on the ground before he walked away. He pulled a cell phone out of his pocket and dialed a number. "Did you record the conversation?" He asked. A man sitting in a white van parked near the area where Byers and Skinner has spoken answered, "yes, we heard the entire conversation and it is recorded for the others to hear." The man stated, hesitated slightly then continued. "It seems Mulder and Scully have an additional cause for us to find them." The voice almost purred over the phone. "They have children together." "Very interesting. Looks like another Mulder generation will be available for the project. Did they say anything about Samantha Mulder?" He asked as he pulled another cigarette out of the pack from his pocket. "No, but I'm sure she is with them." The voice answered. "Very well, don't let them escape this time. The group will be very disappointed if they evade capture again." He ended the conversation by pushing the end button and taking a long drag from his cigarette. He put the phone back in his jacket pocket and walked away murmuring to himself. "Well Carolyn Mulder, grandchildren how nice." He huffed out with a laugh. ***************** 100 Miles Off the Coast of Barcelona The afternoon faded into a splendid sunset on the waters of the Mediterranean. The adults were gathered on the top deck enjoying the colorful sight, and warm early evening peacefulness. As the yacht cruised along at a slow speed, they leisurely moved around the deck. Glenda stood in front of the grill flipping hamburgers as Dana and Samantha placed plates and condiments on the table for their dinner. The children were still in the main salon watching the end of a movie that had kept them engrossed for the last couple of hours. Katie watched over the little ones, making sure they didn't get into trouble. As the daylight faded and the sky darkened, the stars began to flicker on like light switches, igniting their brightness reflecting off the rising moon. Mulder sat in a comfortable lounge chair with his eyes closed enjoying the quietness. Even with the peace he was experiencing, something nagged his conscious mind about traveling to Marseilles again so soon. He tried to put it out of his mind knowing he hadn't been followed. Passing it off as years of learned paranoia settling on him as normal as breathing. He tried to relax and let out a sigh of contentment as his companions moved around him preparing for dinner. "I think Fox could become a real bum in no time Dana." Samantha said bumping Mulder's lounge as she walked past him. Mulder opened one eye, looked at her, then closed it smiling. "I could be contemplating our next move. Intelligent minds need to regroup in a peaceful contentment." He tried to convince his sister who had stopped her preparations and now stood over him with her hands on her hips. "Intelligent mind huh? More like lounge chair lizard." She said snickering as she moved away to continue helping Dana. Mulder smiled without opening his eyes content to sit in the peaceful early evening breeze. The sounds of feet running across the deck alert him to eminent danger. He opened his eyes as two bodies hurled themselves on him. He braced himself as they climbed on top of him. "Hey, did you finish the movie?" Mulder asked looking into mischievous eyes. Will nodded his head. "Yes, Katie turned it off for us." He answered sitting on top of Mulder's midriff and looking at Dana. "I'm hungry." He stated adjusting himself to a comfortable using his father as a cushion. "Me too." Sarah joined in sitting on Mulder's legs. "Dinner will be ready in a minute or two. Did you wash your hands?" Glenda asked from the grill. Sarah and Will looked at each other as their eyes grew large. They slid off Mulder and stood on the deck. "Come on Daddy, you can help us." Sarah pulled on Mulder's arm. "Okay." Mulder grunted as he sat up from his relaxed position knowing his peace and quiet had come to an end. He rose and allow the Uber Mulders to drag him toward the hallway leading to the bathroom. "Don't over exert yourself Mulder." Dana said with a smirk as they walked by her. Mulder didn't have time to answer her as the children dragged him into the interior of the boat. "I think I'll let him give them a bath tonight. He might as well experience more of the parental pleasures kids have to offer." Dana smiled thinking of the sight of a drenched Mulder begging his children not to drown him as they bathed. "That might be very entertaining, Dana." Samantha said with smile trying to envision the sight of a wet Fox in a drenched bathroom. "We should pull up chairs and make popcorn. It ought to be quite a show." "Good idea. I'll bring the camera." Dana added laughing. "What's a good idea?" Mulder asked as he re-emerged with children following him drying their hands by shaking them as they walked. "Oh, nothing much. I was telling Samantha that I think I'll let you bathe the children tonight." She said trying not to smile too broadly. "Yippee, can we take a bubble bath in your bathtub?" Will asked jumping up and down looking at Dana. "Well Fox, what do you say?" Dana said innocently trying hard not to burst out laughing at the look of fear appearing on Mulder's face. Samantha covered her mouth and turned toward the grill so Fox wouldn't see her amusement. "Uhm.....all right.," he hesitantly said, "I think." He murmured to himself as Sarah and Will jumped up and down holding his hand jerking his arms. Dana slipped over to the grill and quietly said. "Chocolate, definitely a chocolate show, forget the popcorn." All three women laughed as a suspicious Fox Mulder watched them. ********** After dinner the children dragged Mulder into the bathroom. Scully followed them gathering their night clothes from the bedroom and placed them out of harms way. She and Samantha watched from the doorway as Mulder read the instructions off the bubble bath bottle. He poured the instructed amount and recapped the bottle setting it next to the tub. Sarah and Will stripped their clothes and climbed into the tub immediately splashing water in Mulder's face. He jumped back a bit wiping his face and wondering what he'd allowed himself to be talked into. Dana retrieved the video camera to film the scene before her as Samantha covered her mouth so as not to alert them to their presence. "Turn on the jets, Daddy so we'll have more bubbles." Sarah pleaded with her father. He reached up and flicked on the motor and squeals broke out as the children sat in front of the sprays of water. Dana and Samantha remained quiet as Mulder sat and watched Will and Sarah play in the bubbles. "We need more bubbles." Will announced. "I think that is enough." Mulder answered. "Please, Daddy. Mommy always gives us more bubbles." Sarah charmed her father with a flash of her bright eyes and pouty lips. "Oh, all right, how much more do you want?" He asked picking up the bottle pouring a stream of the soap into the water. "Is that enough?" He asked as he noticed the bubbles began to spill out of the bath tub. Will stood up and blew a large handful of bubbles in Mulder's face. Dana and Samantha were almost in stitches as Mulder wiped the soap out of his wet face and hair. Dana thought about rescuing him seeing his distress, but refrained knowing he needed to experience this part of parenthood. 'Besides,' she thought, "it was just to funny to interrupt." After another half hour of splashing and cheerful cries, Mulder decided it was time for his children to exit their bath. He felt like he needed to dry out himself being soaked from head to toe. Dana continued to film the action going on before her. Samantha left to attend to Katie. "I think you two are turning into prunes, let me rinse your hair Sarah." Mulder turned on the faucet as Sarah moved to allow him to rinse the bubbles out of her hair. When finished, he retrieved a towel and gathered Sarah into his arms. He gathered her close and their eyes locked. She puckered her lips and he smiled as he gave her a peck on her little lips, hugged her tightly and began to dry her little body. "That was fun Daddy." Sarah said as Mulder retrieved her night gown from the vanity. She raised her arms as he slipped it over her head. He picked up her panties and looked at them then her. He handed the flowered panties to her. "Here, you can put these on can't you?" Mulder asked with the slight distress at handling little girl's under garments. "Yes." Sarah answered accepting the panties, raising her gown to put them on. Dana giggled to herself still filming as Mulder turned back to the tub and pulled Will out and dried him as he stood on the wet floor. "You have to dry my hair." Will said. Mulder nodded his head and moved him toward the vanity. He dropped the towel and helped Will dress then picked him up and placed him on a chair and began drying his hair. Dana moved a little closer to film the challenge of drying Will's hair. After a few minutes, Mulder turned off the hairdryer and dropped it on the counter. "This will have to do Will, I'm no hairdresser." He said looking at Will's flying hair standing on and end going every which way, but down. Will jumped down and ran toward Dana who had stopped the camera and smiled at her son as he hurried past her with Sarah following. "So Fox, how do you like parenting so far?" Dana and Samantha giggled as he turned toward them. "Ha ha. Very funny. I don't suppose you want to help me clean this mess up do you?" He asked surveying the wet bathroom and the two women suppressing their smiles from the doorway. "Pass, this is part of parenting too." Dana said trying hard not to laugh at the wet man looking around at the mess he had to clean up. "We'll be outside when your done." Samantha barely said before she ducked out of the doorway and into Dana's bedroom. ********** After cleaning the bathroom and a lengthy story, Mulder dragged himself to the upper deck to join Samantha and Dana as they enjoyed the beauty of the starry night. He plopped down in a chair looking worn out. He dropped his head backwards propping it on the back of the chair and sighed. "I need a drink." Mulder said closing his eyes. Dana and Samantha looked at each other and laughed so hard they leaned forward holding their stomachs. They couldn't suppress the enjoyment they were experiencing at Mulder's expense. He lifted his head and gave them a dirty look and then leaned his head back again. "Mulder, are you ready to see the lab now?" Dana asked calming her laughter. "In a minute, I need to rest after........." He faded off into sleep. Dana and Samantha stood and slipped down the stairs allowing him a power nap. ********** Dulles International Airport Washington DC Byers entered the airport walking to the British Airways ticket counter to retrieve his ticket for Milan. He looked around as he strolled through the crowded lobby looking for suspicious on-lookers. He stood in line behind two people waiting for his turn. Casting a quick glance at his watch and then the departure schedule, he determined he had an hour before his flight. An uneasy drifted over him as he stepped up to the counter. "I have a reservation and prepaid ticket under the name of David Strattford." He said as he handed the ticket agent his passport. She looked at the passport, then typed his name into the computer. "Yes, Mr. Strattford, you are booked on British Airways 116 leaving at 8:20 PM and arriving in Milan at 9:45 AM. Is this correct?" She asked. "Yes, one way only." He answered looking around again then back to the agent. She handed him the ticket. "Enjoy your flight sir." She said smiling at him as he accepted the ticket and moved toward the international concourse. Byers couldn't shake the feeling someone was watching him as he made his way down the concourse to his gate. He looked over his shoulder and couldn't see anyone following him. He shifted his bag on his shoulder and walked into the men's room near his gate. Byers put down his bag and opened it acting like he was searching for an article as he sat own on the bench seat. He watched as a couple of men walked in and used the facilities and left. He noticed a rather mysterious looking man enter the restroom and walk to the sink washing his hands. He looked up and caught the man's eyes. Byers' breath caught in his throat as he tried not to seem alerted. He calmly pulled out his comb and walked to the mirror and combed his hair as the mysterious man finished washing his hands and moved toward the door. Byers knew what he had to do, walking back to his bags and he stuffed the comb and zipped the bag. He threw one bag over his shoulder and picked up the carry on and walked toward the door. When he exited the bathroom, he could feel eyes boring into his back as he walked toward his gate. He had to find a way to escape, but not alert his suspect. He sat in the waiting area for a while forming a plan, and acting as if he were concentrating on the book held in his hand. Growing restless, he put the book down and calmly moved to the window and looked at the reflection of the crowd behind him. He stole a glimpse of the mysterious man standing off to the right in the next waiting area. He quickly averted his eyes to not alert the man he was aware of his presence. "Passengers on British Airways flight 116 can begin boarding at this time." The ticket agent announced. Byers casually walked to his bags and picked them up moving to stand in line to enter the aircraft. He knew this particular aircraft was equipped with an elevator to the bottom level of the plane. He had to figure out a way to get down the elevator and exit cargo hold without anyone seeing him. He handed his ticket to the flight attendant and walked down the flight ramp to the plane. As he entered the plane he was greeted by another flight attendant who took his boarding pass and pointed where he could locate his seat. Byers calmly made his way back to the galley area where he knew he could gain access to the elevator. He carefully looked around and didn't see the man following him. He reached the galley and was lucky enough for it to be empty. He opened the door to the elevator stepped in closing it gently behind him. Pressing the down button he descended to the lower level. When the elevator stopped, Byers looked around before opening the door. As the knob clicked and opened, he could hear voices in the distance. He stepped out, his eyes roaming the area, then quietly closed the door. Large crates stood to his left so he stepped behind them to separate him from the voices and keep him out of sight. The male voices grew louder as they moved toward the elevator. He waited until the men dropped what they were carrying and moved back in the direction they originated from. Byers looked around the crates and noticed the open cargo door. He moved swiftly to the door and looked around cautiously before stepping out in the open. He pulled back as he heard the sound of a luggage tram coming close to the entrance. The driver brought the tram to a halt and jumped off to unload the luggage he transported. Byers was startled when he heard something heavy drop. He froze when the two men began cursing and yelling for help from the tram operator. The man on the luggage tram left his cargo and ran to help his co-workers. Byers took the opportunity to make his escape. He jumped down the side of the ramp and moved toward the building, glad he hadn't checked any luggage when he arrived. With caution, he moved into the terminal avoiding the main lobby as he made his way to the exit. He nervously stood at the curb and raised his hand motioning for a cab. He didn't have to wait long as a yellow car pulled up beside him. The driver jumped out walking to the rear of the car where Byers met him. The driver opened the trunk as Byers lifted his luggage and placed in the car. The driver shut it and they both climbed into the vehicle. "BWI Airport please." He said to the cab driver. He relaxed a bit when the cab pulled away from the curb. He looked out the back of the cab and didn't see anyone following him. He turned around and sighed heavily. This was going to be more difficult than he originally thought. He hoped Mulder had enough money to cover all these expenses. He pulled out another passport in the name of Jeffrey Burgess. He was glad they were in the business where he could have as many alias as he needed. As they sped through the night, Byers had to make an alternate plan to reach his destination on time. He hoped Frohike and Langly were being as cautious. ********** Off the Coast of Barcelona Fox Mulder woke with a start and winced as he lifted his head from the back of the chair. He looked at his watch -- 10:30pm. He had been asleep for an hour. He yawned as he rose from his chair and walked down to the main salon. No one was there. He descended the stairs and walked into the galley. No one. "They have to be somewhere around here." He said to himself. "Dana, Samantha." Mulder called out as he walked down the hall toward a part of the yacht he hadn't explored before. He came to a steel door and knocked. In a few moments he heard a click and the door opened. Dana stood there motioning for him to come in. She moved back to her computer where she typed in a series of numbers, and hit enter. Mulder looked at the equipment lining the walls of the room. His eyes grew larger noticing the high tech machinery. He walked behind Dana where she sat in front of a computer, watching her type. "What are you doing?" He asked. "Trying to send a message to my mother. Bill taught me how to send a message without it being traced. I've been working on this for a couple of days now. She must be terribly worried about us. I haven't spoken to her since....in a month." Dana explained as she entered another string of information and hit enter. "Mom bought a computer a little over a year ago. We've stayed in touch by using chat rooms, E-mail, but I'm not sure that is secure enough so I am sending her an untraceable message." Dana bit her bottom lip, and tapped the mouse button. "There, I think I've got it." She said as she began typing in a message. Mag, Hope things are well. How about a Fox hunt? The hounds are close, but the Fox is safe. The weather is beautiful, how would you like to take a trip? Hope to see you soon. Kath Scully hit the send button and logged off. She turned around and looked at the puzzled man staring at the screen. "What did you tell her?" Mulder asked. "When I was a teenager, I started calling her Mag, to aggravate her mostly. She retaliated by calling me Kath because she knew I didn't like to be called Katherine. I wanted her to know it was me sending the message. No other person knows those names. I was letting her know you are with me and that she might be in danger. We discussed the coded language when she visited us as the project became more intense. I'm afraid they will try to get to me through her," Dana said looking at the computer screen, "I wish I could talk to her, but I know her phone is tapped. Bill installed a tracking system on our phones which indicates tracing or interruption of a call. When I called Mom right after Bill died, it showed her phone was being tapped. After that, I had Girard change all our numbers and rework the phone system so they, whom ever is tapping her phone, wouldn't be able to recognize the number or trace it back to us." Dana explained as she turned toward Mulder and stood. "This equipment is a conglomerate of technology. I don't know much about it, Bill was the computer brains of the partnership." She stopped suddenly regretting using the term knowing Mulder wouldn't appreciate the reference. She looked into his eyes and could see resentment from the comment. She knew the next confrontation was about to happen. "Mulder, I know this is hard for your to accept. It would be hard for me to accept. But I believe if you will read my journal entries you will understand my decisions. Then we can discuss whatever you want. I promised I would answer all your questions, I know you still have several running through your mind." She looked away breaking the intense stare he had on her. "I don't think I can adequately explain my reasoning better than the words I wrote to you in my journal." Dana almost pleaded with her voice. She felt closed in all of a sudden, and moved for the door to make a hasty retreat. "I'll give you a keycard and the combination of numbers to open the door to the lab. You must be careful when entering and leaving the lab, it is set up with a special alarm system for intruders." She explained. Mulder glanced at the white plastic keycard she had in her hand. He smiled to himself when he noticed the Apollo 11 keychain he had given her for her birthday years before. "I have to check with Girard about our sailing coordinates." Dana tried to leave, but Mulder stopped her by reaching for her arm. "Isn't your reluctance to discuss your reasoning running away again? Didn't you tell me you had stopped doing that?" He asked abruptly. "The fact that I am sharing my journal with you, in order for you to understand what my mind was going through is allowing you into the most private part of my life. That isn't running away at all, it is bearing my innermost part to you willingly." Dana said focusing on his chest. "I had my reasons, whether they were right or wrong. You have to understand, I did what I thought best at the time." Mulder let her arm go, and she continued advancing to the door. Dana turned around and looked to the computer she had just abandoned and then shifted her gaze back to Mulder. "If you want to go on-line and do some surfing, be my guest," She told him as she inserted the keycard and opened the door. He looked at the computer then back to Dana shaking his head. "No I'm tired, I think I'll turn in." Mulder replied, following Dana out of the lab. Dana smiled as she turned away remembering the sight in the bathroom and his worn-out look when he came out onto the deck. Punching in a series of numbers, the door slid shut with a click indicating the door was secured. When she turned around Mulder was standing in front of her just a little too close for comfort. She looked up into his soft questioning hazel eyes. "Did you mean the words you spoke to me last night?" He asked not letting go of her gaze. "Yes........yes, I did, I meant every word. But Mulder, things still aren't right between us yet. I can feel it, and when Bill is mentioned, I see in your eyes the unresolved anger you have for me. We need time to work out the problems of the past before we can continue in the future." She said almost hypnotized by his intense hazel eyes. Dana could feel the electricity between them as they stood so close, it scared her, but couldn't move away. As he looked into her azure eyes it was impossible for him to deny he wanted her badly at that moment. Mulder could feel his desire rising as he stared into her soul. He wanted nothing more than to take her back to his room and relive the passion they shared so long ago. He felt his body beckoning a return of the closeness. If he kissed her, right now, he believed she would succumb to his advances. He leaned his head down toward her, but stopped when uncertainty reflected back to him through her clear eyes. He decided to take Samantha's advice and moved away from her dropping his eyes to the floor as he walked to the stairs. "I'll see you in the morning." He said almost defeated as he walked to the stairs and ascended them slowly. Dana watched him disappear and let out a sigh as she leaned against the metal door for support. She knew her body could not resist the advances of Fox Mulder no matter how much she felt a need to. She wanted to relive the love and tenderness that had remained embedded in her mind after all the years they had been apart. She knew the reunion was still new and the surroundings had kept his mind from focusing on her past betrayal. She believed if he understood her thoughts, he possibly could forgive her completely and they could live in harmony. No matter how much they wanted to give Sarah and Will a home and family, if they could not establish trust between one another again, it would not be a happy life. But Dana also couldn't lie to herself, about how much longer she could deny her body and heart what she wanted most. And that was to share her life with Fox Mulder completely. Dana exhale a heavy sigh, and pushed herself away from the wall, making her way down the hall to the stairs that led to the helm. She climbed them and quietly slipped into the room where Girard was programming coordinates into the computer. "Dana, I believe we are safely off the coast about 100 miles. I want to anchor the boat for the night. I don't want to be too far off shore if the weather turns foul." He said looking from the computer screen to the weather radar for the updated report. "Girard, do you think it is safe to return to Marseilles so soon? I mean if the Consortium knows about the yacht, even if we change the name it is hard to conceal with it's enormous size." She asked looking out the small bridge's window and into the darkness beyond. "I can do some checking Dana, I must agree that returning anywhere we have been isn't wise." He answered following her stare out over the water, and then back down to the computer screen he had been working on when she entered. "I have a bad feeling, I can't pinpoint it, but I think we need to put some distance between us and the mainland for awhile. At least until we can decide our next plan of action. I think you, Mulder and I should sit down tomorrow and come up with a plan." She said looking at Girard who turned his attention to her and away from the computer screen. "We're picking up three friends of Mulder's in Marseilles. I'll do some checking and see what type of resources I can come up with to have them meet us in a different location. Don't worry, these guys are more paranoid than you and I will ever be Girard. They will be careful while traveling here. Trust me." Dana chuckled imagining to what lengths the three men must be going through to be inconspicuous. ********************* Mulder walked into his room and closed the door. He intended to read the journal entries Dana had written to him. He wanted to make sense of the explanation he had processed from a few days before. He knew he loved her more than his own life, but the anger of being denied the knowledge of his children and left in a lonely existence for the last four years grew inside his mind. Mulder noticed a box on his bed that hadn't been there before. He took the lid off the box to reveal several video tapes. He remembered Dana telling him she had made a library of Will and Sarah's lives. He read the labels --12/10/97, 12/15/97 - Birth date of Sarah Elizabeth and William Christopher. Mulder picked up the tape and stared at it for a moment, then he crossed over to the television and picked up the remote control. Slipping it in the VCR, he waited for a second until he heard the clicking the machine accepting the tape. Then turned and walked back to his bed removing his clothes, save his boxers, he laid them on the bed. Mulder grabbed a couple of pillows from under the bed spread and walked to the couch. His feelings were swirling in his head as he put the pillows on the leather sofa, and settled in for a view of the birth of his children. He turned on the television with a click of the remote. He then hit the *play* button and the tape player came to life. The screen lit up with the sight of Dana looking like she had a huge basketball under her tented shirt. She looked beautiful, but weary, as if she had been struggling to carry the load that weighed her down. "Mulder, in a few days I will deliver these two." She ran her hands over the roundness under her shirt. She smiled at the camera as she spoke and Mulder felt his breath catch in his throat as his emotions stirred again. "They're going to be early, but the doctor is afraid to let me go much further. Seems they are tapping all my energy. I wanted you to see them before and after." She said turning around to display a panoramic view of her body. Then she reached for the button toward the camera and she disappeared into blackness. The next scene that came to life, and from the looks of the equipment, Mulder was able to identify it as a hospital delivery room. His eyes widened at the sight of Dana soaked with sweat and gasping on the screen. "Okay Dana, your doing fine. Just a couple more pushes and you'll be through." Mulder heard an unidentified female say to the panting red-head who looked like she had run a marathon, she was soaked with perspiration. "I'm too tired, I can't push anymore." Dana said as a hand wiped her brow. "You said this would go fast, it's been eight hours and I'm exhausted." She said with a raspy low voice. Mulder recognized the low sounding Scully voice he enjoyed so many times before. "Come on Dana, you can do this. Just a one more time, okay." Mulder heard the voice of Margaret Scully and then her face was in view of the camera as she bent down close to Dana's face. "Just think, if you try just one more time, you can rest and your children will be here. And Dana, I want to see my grandchildren. OKAY?" She encouraged her daughter. Dana nodded and girded herself for another assault on her small tired body. "Okay Dana, when I say push give it all you've got." The female voice told her. Dana rose up and took in a deep breath. Then gritting her teeth, she bore down and pushed with all her might. The sweat dripped off her hair, and her face was distorted with the effort. "That's good, keep going , keep going. I see the head, it's coming out. Don't give up Dana." The voice said. Margaret held Dana's hand and her back as Dana pushed with all her might. She was as ready as everyone else to shed this load that she had carried for the last eight months. Though the doctors decided the twins had to make an early appearance, it had been expected so she didn't mind. The pressure and weight of them had fatigued and given her aches and pains everywhere, in every position. "I've got the head, push Dana." The voice commanded. Dana took another breath and bore down harder, even though she didn't believe she could. "Here we go," exclaimed the voice, that Mulder had by now determined as the doctor, informed Dana and her mom as she caught the bloody baby. "It's a boy." She reached for the clamps and scissors to cut the cord. An assistant took the baby from the doctor after she cut the cord and disappeared from the camera's sight. Mulder could feel Dana's exhaustion as he watched the scene before him. He felt her pain as she laid back to rest for the final delivery. Margaret wiped her brow as Dana looked at her mom with weary eyes. "Is he okay Mom, can you tell if he is okay?" Dana said in an almost panicked voice. Then she heard him cry out. She looked at her mom and laughed as though she was hearing the sweetest sound she thought she ever would hear. It was cut too short by another pain assaulting her. "AAHHHHH." She yelled as she grabbed her abdomen. "Dana, we have one more that wants to join the world. You have to find the strength the push this little one out." The doctor said as the baby boy screamed in the background. Dana rose with the help of her mother one last time and gritted her teeth as she prepared to bring her second child into the world. The camera moved to where the crying originated. The nurses were carefully bathing the angry little squirming baby. Mulder's mouth turned up into a faint smile as he observed his son protesting being disturbed from his comfortable dwelling place. The camera moved back to Dana and Margaret. Dana grunted loudly and Mulder swore she said a few curse words with his name added under her breath as she pushed again. He could feel her exasperation as she suffered through another long strenuous push to deliver his second child. Suddenly, he felt sadden by the fact that he hadn't been there to comfort her and hold her hand through this time. He was thankful Dana had her mother to give her support, but it didn't assuage the helplessness he felt as he viewed the tape. Scully gave another determined cry as she pushed with her remaining strength. "Here's the head, keep going Dana, we're almost there. The doctor encouraged as Dana's face turned as red as her fiery hair. Her eyes closed tightly as the force of the baby appeared between her legs. The camera moved to where he could see Sarah appearing to the world for the first time. Her face was small and her eyes were closed as if refusing to accept her new surroundings. "I've got the head and shoulders, a little more.......that's good," the doctor said as she helped Dana by pulling the baby after the shoulders had cleared the opening. "It's a girl!" The physician declared as Dana fell back onto the table and gasped. She looked at her mother who wiped her brow again and smiled at her. "It's all over sweetheart." Margaret Scully pushed Dana's wet hair from her face, as they heard the second cry and Dana seem to relax all the way, then she began to cry. Mulder could almost feel the relief that flooded her at that moment as if he were right there with her. He exhaled a heavy breath. "I did it Mulder." She stated as she looked in the camera and it faded to black. Mulder felt his eyes water at the short message she had spoken to him. "You sure did." He whispered back to her as he wiped the tears that escaped from his eyes. When the picture flashed again it was a hospital room. Mulder could see Dana with two babies cradled in her arms facing the camera. "Fox, I want you to meet your children -- William Christopher, after you and my father's middle name. Dana nodded toward her left to identify which child she was introducing. Then she looked to her right. This is Sarah Elizabeth -- Sarah by my choice and Elizabeth after my mom." She bent down and kissed both children without looking in the camera. Then the picture faded once more to black. Mulder could feel the tears fall down his cheeks as his emotions erupted at the realization of the miraculous sight he had missed. He was thankful for the tape and that he would always be able to relive the moments of Sarah and Will's birth. Turning off the recorder and the television, he rose from the sofa and walked into the bathroom. It took a splash of cold water on his face to bring his raw emotions under control. He felt numb as he looked at himself in the mirror and saw the pain that he felt in his heart. Pushing himself away from the sink, he walked back into his room and grabbed his shorts yanking them on his body with angry force, then he pulled his T-shirt over his head without straighten his mussed hair. He spied the journal laying on the bed, and walked over and picked it up. Staring at the leather bound pages, he moved his finger over it tracing the edges. 'How could she do this to me?' He thought bitterly as he walked toward the door. He walked into the hallway and followed it to the upper deck where he hoped he could calm his raging anger by reading her words. But right then all he wanted to do was scream at being denied what he had force to witness on the merest of video tape. Mulder was hit by the warm breeze as he emerged from the interior of the boat. He took a deep breath to ease his troubled mind and looked around for the light switch. With a flick of his finger the outer deck flooded with light. He walked to a cushioned lounge chair settling himself into a comfortable position. Mulder was amazed that he hadn't been sea sick since boarding the boat. He remembered his discomfort when they were on the boat where they almost lost their lives to premature aging. He shook the memory from his head not wanting to jinx his good fortune and focused on book of Dana's handwriting before him. He opened it to the first page. JOURNAL ENTRY July 4, 1997 Dear Mulder, I'm beginning these journal entries of my thoughts and feelings for you to ease my troubled mind and heart. And that you might know me more intimately as I share my reasons for what I have done. I will share my heart with you, not my scientific mind or analysis. My innermost desire is for you to know my mind as I face the future with much anticipation and yet with much apprehension of the unknown. It is Independence Day today, though the British do not consider it a day of declaring freedom. More of a day of loss as they remember reluctantly letting go of an independent society so many years ago. This is my independence day of letting go of secrets buried deep within myself and allowing the freedom of confession to lift my spirit and give me a reason to believe. I need to believe that we will forever be partners -- even if only in spirit. I hope by sharing the progress of my pregnancy, it will ease some of the pain I know I will have caused you when you find out about the baby. And to ease the pain that I do not wish to pass on to our child. For if I keep this pain locked inside of me, it will truly cause this little one much anxiety even before taking its first breath. We have known too much of this in the past Mulder, and I do not wish for the pain to continue into another generation. This journal was a gift from Bill to help me through the next several months. In turn, it is my gift to you with hope you will find answers in my confessions. Thank you for taking this journey with me as we have experienced many in the past. My thoughts are with you always. Love, Scully --------- July 5, 1997 Dear Mulder, I need to explain why I have taken the path I have chosen. I want to apologize, first of all, for the thoughtlessness I bestowed upon you, as I waged my war of imbalanced emotion and jealousy. I have condemned myself repeatedly for losing my control and hurting you as well as myself. I know you feel betrayed by the only person you trusted. For this I am truly sorry. For I feel I have abandoned you at our most critical hour. Although the desire of my heart is to confess the secret which I hide from you, I am reminded of the danger we both face should forces beyond our control attempt to intervene in our lives by this truth. My heart is heavy, but I believe this path is the best for our situation. As my body changes and my emotions fluctuate, I marvel at the closeness I feel for the embryo growing inside me. You once stated that you *never saw me as a mother*. Those words troubled me for a long time. I became so wrapped up in our crusade for the truth that I did not hear my life beckoning the natural desire to procreate. Now, by some miracle, I am fortunate enough to be able to carry a life inside of me, and I cherish being able to experience being a mother at last. It finally settled on me after I learned I was pregnant. At first, I felt afraid and ashamed. I am an unwed mother bringing shame to my family as well as my reputation that I guarded much more before the X-Files, I must confess. Do not blame yourself for this loss, I would much rather experienced the things I did while working with the X-Files than an unspotted reputation. But, I am glad my father is not here to witness my betrayal of family honor. After I finished condemning myself, I began to feel the thrill of having a life growing inside of me, that I may love and cherish as my own flesh and blood. To somehow understand, though very limited, the words Mrs. Peacock spoke to me when we tried to rescue her in Home, Pennsylvania. She said I would never understand the love between a mother and her children until I had one of my own. She, though sporting a distorted view of love, was correct in her analysis. I have come to feel what true love is. It is the same kind of love my mother felt for each of us. I have only been pregnant for a short time, but my mind wanders to what will happen when this child grows and leaves the safety of my arms. I hope you understand where I am leading you with this long entry. I want this child to be safe. If that means sacrificing my happiness, or even yours, so be it. I will do everything in my power to protect, and allow this living being the opportunities to grow up in a world not shadowed with fear and anxiety, but love and comfort. I am sorry I have sacrificed your future along with mine. But, I will walk this path with strength and belief that I am embarking on a journey that I fear we can not walk together. You must know, that you are always in my heart. We are bound together in a journey regardless of your knowledge. And my decisions, though you may not agree, are my own. Love, Dana Mulder read the last hand-written entry and thought about what she said. He could tell she felt fear. Of what? Him? Was she telling him she feared the same fate that Samantha suffered would befall their offspring? He put the book down for a moment and looked out at the starry sky. 'What did his future hold for these children? Would it be better to walk away from them and Dana ensuring their safety?' He thought as he stared out at the stars. Maybe when this mission was accomplished he would not hold on to the ties that would bind his children to the fears he had experienced for his life since Samantha was taken. His thoughts were interrupted as he looked up and saw Will walking toward him. Without a word he held his arms out for the sleepy little boy to join him, which he did settling on top of him and falling back into a deep sleep. 'No.' He thought as he kissed the top of Will's head and wrapped his arms loosely around him. He could never abandon the new emotions of complete happiness such as, feeling his son so close to him. He could not go back to his lonely existence no matter how much danger they would face. For together they would conquer the demons that sought to tear their world apart. Mulder sighed and picked the book up again and read several more entries as Will's even breathing and warmth comforted him, as he battled his emotions from the words Dana had written him long ago. *************** 46th Street, New York City "Have you found containment for the problem?" The manicured man asked his companion sitting across from him. The man exhaled a puff of smoke , "I have the problem under control," he said trying to sound confident when inside he was feeling anxious at the events that caused this meeting. "You call losing Samantha Mulder and her child under control? They were an integral part of the project. Now we are faced with exposure at a very critical point. The *date* has been set and we are quickly approaching it. Lives have been sacrificed for this event." The heavy set man said as he paced near the window of the darkened room lit only by small lamps. "I have my most efficient people following suspects that are rendezvousing with Fox Mulder, supposedly his sister and her daughter. We intercepted a telephone conversation Mulder made to his associates. The call was traced to an island in the Mediterranean, I have deployed my people to track them down, they will start there. He took another drag from his cigarette and eyed the group. As he exhaled he stood up and walked toward the window. Then turned around to face the group wanting to see their reactions to his additional news. "I have added information that might interest the group." He said taking a long drag from his cigarette, his exhale filling the small room with the foul odor. "I have discovered that Dana Scully Jacbos' two children are actually Fox Mulder's, not Bill Jacobs. This could be an added bonus to our research." He stated hoping to deflect some of the anxiety the group was welding at him. "Agent Mulder? A father?" The manicured man said with a sinister voice. "This could very well be the leverage we need to stop his interference in the project." He voiced narrowing his eyes to mere slits. There was infinite silence. Then a Japanese man with white hair spoke up. "The test we ran on Ms. Scully did not leave her barren, we must retrieve her, at all cost, and study her again to discover the strengths her body yields to defeat our first attempts." He stated and continued. "We need her DNA to give strength to the race we are building for the future. She could be vital to our further research." He finished. "Yes......," the heavy set man hissed, "make sure she and the children are retrieved unharmed. The cigarette smoking man bent over the ashtray on the table and snuffed out his firestick as he prepared to leave. "Very well, I will instruct my colleagues to take protective precautions." He turned to leave, but hesitated. "What do you want to do with Agent Mulder and his sister?" He asked for instructions. "With the new discoveries they are of little use. We are not concerned with them anymore. Samantha and her daughter have given us all the information we need from them. They are to be eliminated to ensure our secrets will not be revealed." The manicured man stated with no remorse. "As for Agent Mulder, we can control him as we controlled his father. And if he becomes too much of a nuisance, he can be eliminated also." The manicured man stated sitting in the high backed wing chair. As the tall thin man turned to leave, he pulled another cigarette out of his jacket pocket and lit it inhaling yet another nerve easing drag. "Very well. I will keep you informed." He said as he walked out of the room. ****************** Frohike strolled off the airplane and down the ramp to make his way through the Heathrow airport. He looked around as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. Adjusting the heavy satchel of equipment over his shoulder, he walked with the flow of the crowd. He did not notice the woman, who had sat behind him on the plane, following him. She kept a discreet distance while observing him move towards his next destination. She had taken extra precautions to remain anonymous, and smiled to herself at her craftiness. Frohike walked into the men's room shedding his burdens placing them on the floor in front of him. He had an unsettling feeling that he was being watched although he had taken every precaution with his traveling. He used an alias, William Hall, and watched his back for any sign of MIB's or threatening looking characters. He walked to the sink and splashed cool water in his face to awaken his senses. He combed his hair and stopped in mid brush with an idea. He finished his task and walked over to his luggage, pulled out a surveillance camera and lens for looking around corners. He thought it useful if he stumbled on a topless beach at his destination. He never wanted to pass up a chance to appreciate the opposite sex -- no matter how they were dressed. Frohike pulled out the camera and walked to the edge of the wall leading out to the lobby. He moved the camera in position, thankful it was early morning and not many people in the airport. The last thing he needed was to be arrested as a pervert peeking at people. He looked out from the restroom to surveyed the lobby. No one looked terribly out of place. A nice looking woman standing on the other side. She had been on the plane sitting behind him. He had noticed her well shaped body and long legs. He started to scan the rest of the hallway when his instincts told him to look at her more closely. He moved the camera lens back to her and noticed she looked particularly interested in this particular restroom. He snapped her picture a few times, then ducked back into the men's room as a group of men made their way to the lavatory. He quickly placed his camera back in his heavy bag and sat down to form a plan to make sure she, in fact, was following him. He pulled a <Travel Europe> brochure out to check his choices for travel. He studied his options and decided he would fly to Milan and take a train as close to Marseilles as he could and worry about the rest when he arrived. He had time before they were to meet Mulder. He doubted if they would leave without him, but he didn't want to waste time possibly causing him to be abandoned in a foreign country. He picked up his bags and exited the men's room. He wondered if Byers and Langly were having the same trouble as he. But he wouldn't worry about them now, he had a tail to loose. He thought it a shame to, because she was quite attractive. 'Hmmmm very attractive.....' He thought and smiled as he formed a plan. ************** Off the Coast of Barcelona Dana Scully watched Mulder and Will as they sat together in the late even outside as the warm salt breeze blew their hair slightly. She wanted to talk to Mulder, but chose to allow him to continuing reading her words as he held their sleeping son. She stopped as she past Mulder's room, where she saw the opened box and knew he had viewed some of the tapes. She continued down the short hallway to the stairs wanting to talk to Girard. She had been unable to sleep with troubled thoughts of her mother once more. "Girard." She said in an even voice so not to scare him as he steered the yacht and studied the book he had propped on the wheel. He turned and acknowledged her as he put the book down. "Dana, I thought you would be asleep by now." He said smiling at her. "Is there something bothering you?" He asked. "Yes, I have been worried about my mother. I sent her a message to be careful, but I can't get her out of my mind." She looked out over the water then back to Girard. "Do you think we could smuggle her out of the country and to where we are going? I don't care what it costs." She stated, thanking Bill again for leaving her the means to accomplish this task. "Where are we going Dana?" Girard asked glancing at the vast expanse of water then back to Dana. Dana walked to the map cabinet and pulled out an atlas. She opened the book and turned a few pages. Then she walked over to where Girard was sitting and handed him the book. "I've been thinking about that. I went to the lab and did a search of the area for possible places we could safely hide from the Consortium. Since the project is moving to the coast of Florida, I think our best advantage point is somewhere off the US Virgin Islands. Since cruise ships come in and out of port several times a week, this beacon of a boat will blend in easily. There is a flotilla of large yachts and sailing boats arriving in St. John's next week. The festival will go on for one week. I also looked for accommodations and found a couple of possible places we could stay. They are remote enough for Samantha and Katie's safety. But we will have to be careful to not allow anyone to see them. Also, I think we should dock somewhere and change the name again before we reach the eastern coast. When we were in Palma Mulder made a telephone call to his friends. I hate to sound paranoid, but if the call was traced, they may be able to trace us from the hotel. This craft isn't exactly inconspicuous." She stated looking up from the book to Girard then back to the book and continued. "If we sail from where we are now, after we pick up Mulder's friends, we can cruise to Azores Islands stop, refuel and make our way to the Caribbean. It is roughly 3,000 nautical miles. If we sail at 14 knots, we should reach it within five days, if the weather holds for us." Dana said moving her finger over the map. She stopped and looked into Girard's eyes. "Remember when Bill and I sailed across the ocean before the twins were born?" She asked with a laugh. "Oh yes, you were quite miserable the whole trip. The seas where rough and you were the most interesting shade of green." He smiled slightly remembering the trip. "That's a trip I would like to forget, but it can be done. This boat has a capacity to sail 6,500 miles right?" She asked. "Yes, if we fuel in the Azores, we should have no trouble crossing fuel wise. I will need to do some research on the weather so we can avoid any treacherous waves. This vessel is large, but mother nature can remind us, just how strong she can be." Girard stated. "Fine. The worst part is being cooped up on this yacht for four days." Dana said looking again out the front of the boat to the dark sea outside. "I'm sure you can keep the children busy. If we stop in the Azores we can take a break while we refuel, there are some nice mountains to climb. Maybe, if we exhaust them with a hike, they won't drive us crazy before we reach the Virgin Islands." He said trying to comfort her. "It's not the children I'm thinking of." She said with a smile. "Mulder's friends are quite interesting, to say the least." Dana said thinking of being forced to spend several days cooped up with Mulder's paranoid friends. She shivered slightly. She hoped Frohike wouldn't bring any unwanted viewing materials with him. Dana stood and closed the book. "When can my mother expect to be retrieved? I have to let her know." She asked as she crossed the room and put the book back in the compartment and shut the door securely. "We can remove her tomorrow. If they're monitoring her, you might alert them to what we hope to accomplish if you contact her. Is there a message I can give my contact, for her to know you are the one wanting her to leave?" He asked knowing the Margaret Scully he met would not trust so easily. "Mag, I call her Mag and she calls me Kath. Tonight I encouraged her to take a trip and that the hounds were close, but the Fox was safe. You can tell them to use those words and Mom will know she can trust them." Dana said as she crossed to the door and opened it to exit. "Girard, I want the best men or women you can find, I don't care what it cost, I want her safely waiting for us when we arrive. Girard nodded his head. "I'll take care of it Dana, don't worry you can trust me when I tell you she is already there." He said confidently. He appreciated the strong Scully women and their spirit to rise above difficult circumstances. "Thank you Girard, I appreciate your help more than you will ever know." Dana said with a warm smile and soft voice as she walked out of the helm. She let out a heavy sigh and proceeded to her room for the evening. **************** Journal Entry July 7, 1997 Fox, I'm having twins! I had an ultrasound today and they discovered I'm pregnant with twins. I believe twins are on my mother's side. I wish I knew if your family genes included twins. Oh well, it doesn't matter. I'm so excited. I had the doctor do a series of test a couple of weeks ago checking for birth defects or anything suspicious. The results came back and they haven't found any substantial problems. Oh Fox, thank you. I can't begin to tell you how much this means to me. I wish you knew how much I want to talk to you. I have to fight with all my strength at times. I am sorry you can't be here with me, but my thoughts are with you. Love, Dana Mulder felt a pang of resentment rise in his belly. He could feel the emotion of her words with her discovery. He wished she had called him. Journal Entry July 17, 1997 Dear Mulder, It's just me and you for a while. Bill is traveling to the rain forest in search of a cure for my cancer. Though the cancer hasn't grown much in size, my nose bleeds are becoming a regular occurrence. He will be gone for several weeks, and my mother is traveling to stay with me in his absence. I'm back at the Embassy working my undercover job as liaison. I didn't tell you who I ran into a few months back. Phoebe Green. I was attending a dinner and had gone to the restroom because I wasn't feeling well. Little did I know, I was pregnant. Anyway, she came strolling into the restroom like the queen herself. We exchanged words -- I'd like to say warmly, but I won't lie. She threw a couple of potential insults my way, asked about you and left to catch her evening prey. Little did I know she had her eye on Bill. When I walked up to him and he more or less brushed her off. It was a real *Kodak moment*. She turned green before my eyes. Oh, she sends you her love. Love, Dana ********** Mulder snorted a bit picturing Phoebe being rejected. He thought she deserved whatever humiliation came her way, and the fact that Dana had dished it out, made it even sweeter. He started to turn the page when Will stirred. He knew he needed to move him to a more stationary bed, so he closed the book and laid it on the table next to his chair. He pulled Will up on his chest resting his head on his shoulder and stood up carefully. The movement didn't seem to disturb the dead weight of his young son. He balanced Will and retrieved the journal, moving to the door way, flicking off the light as he passed the switch. Mulder entered his room and put the book down on the sofa. He pulled the covers back and carefully cradled the peaceful boy in his arms as he lowered him to the bed. Will turned on his side never opened his eyes. Mulder covered his small body and sat down beside him. He gazed at Will, thinking of the tape he had viewed a short time before. He reached out and ran his fingers lightly through Will's hair then rose from the bed and walked over to the sofa. He turning on a small lamp at one end of the comfortable leather sofa and settled himself down with the journal knowing he couldn't sleep just yet. He looked at Will one more time and opened the book again to resume his reading. ------------ July 19, 1997 Journal Entry Dear Mulder, I'm alone, and my hormones are causing pensive reflection. I feel the need to tell you the feelings I experienced the night we shared our love and our bodies. It has impacted my life in so many ways. Please let me try and form my thoughts into words. First of all, I have to explain my scattered emotions of that evening. I wanted to hurt you. The jealousy and betrayal I felt for you grew daily. I reserved all my strength to keep my emotions under control. I hated the thought of leaving you, but couldn't bear to stay in the prision I felt I was in. I felt I was abandoning my place next to you searching for the endless truth that eluded us constantly. Of protecting you from others with no concern for your life. But angry that you had so little regard for me. I gave you and the Bureau so much of my life as your professional partner, there was very little of my own identity left. I was Fox Mulder's partner, or Agent Scully of the FBI. There was no Dana to be found. Maybe that is why I allowed myself to be put into danger with Ed Jerse, I needed to find what I had lost. To regain insight into my life that had turned into anything but my own. I felt out of control, almost a child again searching for what I would find when I matured. It was careless and stupid. Now, I am forever reminded of that night with the mark on my back. I wished many times the mark I left on you could be as easy to live with. I felt similar the night I came to your apartment. It was almost like you stripped my dignity when I saw you with that woman in New York. Then I hated myself for allowing you to have such control over me. Someone else controlling my life. It frightened and angered me. The days after I saw you, I tried to keep you as far away as possible. I closed off, hid within the confines of my world. I avoided contact with you. I would sit in my apartment and listen to your pleas for me to call. It almost broke my will, but I stood firm and kept the walls in place so you couldn't hurt me again. So I would not lose control of my fleeting life. When I came to your apartment I was determined not to allow you to control my actions anymore. No matter what you said, I wouldn't allow you to persuade me to give up the opportunity to seek a better life away from the X-Files. While all along I begged you in my mind to give me a reason to stay. Our relationship had deteriorated and it took all my energy to work with you, and maintain a professional distance. I spent evenings away from home, running in the opposite direction of the pain instead of facing it and you. I became an expert at hiding within myself. I made myself believe I could only find the answers to my illness on my own, convinced it didn't effect you. It didn't invade your body with the threat of death. I lived with the truth everyday not knowing how much longer I would be able to live under favorable conditions. When you opened the door and I looked in your eyes, I felt the instant lose of something so special that I would never again witness. I steeled myself and kept my walls in place around my heart. I would not allow you to break my resistance. I ranted and raved stalling for courage to let you go. My energy depleted when you turned me around and I looked in your eyes. I saw the confusion in your face, and for a moment I almost believed I saw what could have been caring or love. At that moment I lost my heart and my senses. I wanted you, if only for one night, I wanted to know what it felt like to be intimately close to you. I wanted to be the taker. I wanted you to know what it felt like to be used and pushed aside. For this I am truly sorry. I allowed my control to slip for selfish desire to feed the jealous rage within my heart. When I kissed you I felt like someone had taken me out of my body, for nothing I could feel and taste has ever been that wonderful. I didn't want to stop exploring your essence. I tried to keep my distance emotionally, but I was lost in a sea of bliss. When you took me in your arms and carried me to your bed, I didn't care if I died tomorrow for I knew I was tasting a bit of heaven at that moment. And if heaven was one minute as wonderful as your warmth and closeness I was ready. As we made love to each other, I felt our souls merge to dance the ancient ritual as we were meant to share. One life. One breath. One soul. I couldn't stop feeling you, tasting you, loving you. Your sexual fragrance was a drug that made me long for and demand more. I pushed my mind to memorize each spot that I touched making your moan in pleasure. I memorized every part of your body. I felt you were my strength, and I would disappear if you weren't touching me for I had lost myself in you. I had never experienced such intensity and believed I never would again after that night. When I awoke the reality of what my selfishness had caused. I rebuilt my walls to resume their shield around my heart. For you had gone through to act of loving me, but you did not tell me you loved me. I felt dirty, used like one of the women on those tapes that captures your attention. I hated myself for letting my control slip yet again. I vowed not to do it again. I would remain alone forever if that is what it took for me to gain control of my life, I was so afraid of losing. Distancing myself from what happened since then, I have looked back on that night many times. I laid in bed reliving the feel of your hands moving over my body. The sensation of your lips as they kissed me. The feel of you moving in and out of me as you brought me near death with the ecstasy I experienced. I remember the smell of your skin as you covered me with your body that brings me comfort even now. I'm sorry for so many things. I don't know what else to say. I can't change the past. I must look to the future and what life offers me. But I face the future with the memory of the night we shared. Reliving in my heart how our souls merged to danced with the stars. Thank you for that magical night. Love, Dana Mulder stopped reading and put the journal down fighting the urge to run out of the room and down the stairs to her. He knew he had the answer he was looking for. She had shared his identical experience and he longed to dance with her again. He looked up as Will stirred and made a noise. The spell was broken as he put the book down and walked to the bed where his son seemed to be having a bad dream. He sat down on the bed and stroked Will's hair. The contact seem to soothe the restless boy as his breathing evened out and he stopped struggling. Mulder decided he would have to tap into his psychological training to understand why Will suffered from continuous interruptions in his sleep. Mulder rose from the bed and moved back to the sofa. He picked up the journal again, though the spell had been broken from the last entry. He forged ahead to read more of Dana's thoughts. He didn't know how much more of the entries he could read if they effected him as the last one. ********** Journal Entry August 14, 1997 Dear Mulder, I have thought a lot about Penny and Betsy the last several days. I know I haven't written you in quite a while. I had to make a decision and thinking of you constantly would prevent me from taking the step. As I remember the sadness on Penny's face when she lay dying before me, I vowed to avenge her death. I would be the one to survive and take revenge for the affliction the MUFON women were stricken so violently with. I remember I told you I had things to finish and prove to myself when we stood in the hallway at the Allentown hospital. Today I take another step toward finding the answers for these women and ensuring my success. I am marrying Bill Jacobs tomorrow. I want you to understand why I feel I must take this step. Not only for Penny and the other women, but for the children I carry within me. I can not allow them to bear the burden of being bastard children. I hope you will understand. Bill is a wonderful man. He will take care of us and he loves me more than his own life. I am sure I will grow to love him as we built our future together. We will continue to search for the answers to avenge the MUFON women. We will work until we are successful. I feel once more I am betraying you. Though I understand that you have someone new in your life. I hope she will love you, and can fill the void of emptiness I could always see in your eyes. The void you wouldn't allow me to fill. Take care of yourself Fox. I hope happiness will find you. Love, Dana Mulder felt his heart ache as he read the words before him. Even with the knowledge he no longer existed, Mulder couldn't help feel rage for a man who took his place so easily and shared the lives of his children and Dana. But in the same anger he felt gratitude, if that was possible, for the fact that Bill Jacobs had taken his children and given them happiness and safety. He looked at his watch -- 1:21am. He thought of Langly, Byers and Frohike. He wished he could contact them and make sure they were on track to meet him in two days. Mulder had an uneasy feeling about going back to Marseilles so soon. He believed he hadn't been followed, but wasn't convinced the Gunmen would be so fortunate. He wanted to talk to Dana about a different retrieval plan for his friends. He feared for Samantha and Katie. His apprehension grew when he considered what the Consortium and the black lung devil would do if they knew about his children. Would they try and use them against him? He would have to form a plan with Dana to ensure they never came close enough to have a chance of even glimpsing a sight of them. He thought of Skinner and what he must be thinking about these events. Did Byers contact him? Did he tell him about Will and Sarah? He wanted to contact his supervisor, but could he trust him? He knew Skinner could be playing both sides of the game. Would he protect them or would he turn on them? Would he help expose the Consortium to be rid of the cigarette man? These were questions his tired mind would answer later. Mulder settled into the warmth of the sofa and closed the journal placing it on the table in front of him. Reaching up and turning off the light, he hoped once more to relive the dream made so long ago. *********** Langly made his way through the Lyon airport. He wearily looked at the departure flights for Marseilles. He had changed planes in Paris and was beginning to feel the jet lag that threatened to take his strength. It had been two days since he boarded the flight at Washington National, and he had very little sleep since then. He looked around for Byers or Frohike. Though they had not agreed to meet anywhere accept Marseilles, he was hoping to run into either of them about now. He walked toward the gate indicating his departure flight in 30 minutes. He knew he would be early arriving, but planned to take advantage of his time to catch up on sleep he desperately needed. He adjusted his tote bag on his shoulder and walked slowly to his next gate. The dark man followed him with a discreet distance between them. He too, felt the fatigue of traveling so far in a short time. He had almost lost his prey in Paris. Now in the Lyon airport he knew of his destination -- Marseilles. He was instructed to alert his employer of their destination, but being greedy, he chose to capture the group and receive the whole reward. He was confident he would not fail. So he purchased his ticket and made his way to the area where they would board the small plane to Marseilles and his reward. ************* Morning broke through Mulder's window with a brilliance of light. He opened his eyes to see Will and Sarah standing over him. "Daddy, why did you sleep there?" Will asked. Mulder smiled at his curious son ruffling his disarrayed hair. He pushed himself into a sitting position rubbing his eyes and yawned. "I guess I fell asleep." He answered leaning on the back of the sofa trying to wake up. Sarah climbed onto the couch and snuggled close to her father. He put his arm around her and kissed the top of her head. She looked up at him and smiled at him melting Mulder's heart. "Here you are," Dana announced from the doorway, "I knew I would find you two up here." She added with a smile. Will walked to her and she picked him up. "Visiting your Dad again last night?" She asked with a raised eyebrow. Will nodded and gave her a genuine Mulder puppy-dog look, then he put his head on her shoulder resting it there. Dana looked at Mulder who looked back at her. They read each others thoughts as they agreed their kids had a way of melting their hearts right in front of their eyes with just a small gesture of love. Dana had never become immune to these acts of love. She hoped she never would. As Dana looked in Mulder's eyes she could feel him staring into her soul and it made her uneasy that his gaze was so intense. She asked with her eyes what he was thinking. His look was filled with emotions she could not identify -- anger, love, confusion? She knew they had to work out their differences soon before they began their long journey across the Atlantic. She dropped her gaze to Will still resting on her shoulder. "Hey, why don't we go down stairs and allow your Dad to take a shower." She whispered to Will. He lifted his head and looked at his father still cuddling Sarah next to him. "Can we have something to drink?" Will asked. "Yes, I believe Glenda can help you with that. Why don't you and Sarah go down to the galley and ask Glenda if she has coffee ready for Mul....your Dad and me." She stated as she allowed Will to slide down her body to the floor. Sarah looked up at her father and scooted off the sofa leaving an empty spot next to him. He felt an instant coolness at the absence of his small warm daughter. Sarah and Will moved to the door. "Are you coming Mommy. Or are you going to help Daddy with his bath?" Sarah asked innocently. Dana blushed and turned away from Mulder so he wouldn't see the red color invading her face. "No, but I would like a word with him." She said shooing them out the door. When the heat dissipated from her face, she turned back to a grinning Mulder. "You can help me if you want." He said suggestively. Dana felt the heat rise in her face again remembering what was under his clothes and how he made her feel. She cleared her throat without acknowledging his words. "Did you read any of my journal entries?" She asked wanting to change the subject quickly. Mulder looked at her and rose to his feet and walked over to the window looking out over the water as he reflected on his emotions from the night before. "Yes, I did. I stayed up for a while last night reading what you wrote." He answered with an even tone. "I understand your reasons, though I don't agree with them. I thought I could handle it, being in the past......" turning around he continued, "until I viewed the tape of the kids being born." He said turning to look at Dana and nailed her with blazing eyes. He felt anger begin to fill his mind as he said. "Do you know what that did to me? I felt my heart ripped out of my chest Scully. I should have been there to hold your hand, to see my children come into the world, to cut the umbilical cord for Christ sake." He breathed exasperatingly raking his hand through his hair remembering the scene. He moved his other hand to his hair and raised his eyes to the ceiling holding his head. "I don't know if I can forgive you for denying me that once in a life time event." He said dropping his eyes to Dana who looked stricken. "You don't realize what I went through after you left me. First I was in shock. I convinced myself that any day you would walk back through the basement door and announce that you had made a mistake, that you loved me. Anything, but the loneliness that I felt. Even......" he sighed trying to gain control of his anger, "even with Cheryl, I grieved for you." He turned and looked at Dana then back to the ceiling. "Then, when I heard you married Bill Jacobs a part of me died. Cheryl tried desperately to bring me out of the darkness I had enveloped around myself. But even her strength began to dwindle as I dropped deeper and deeper into lonely despair. I cut myself off from everyone. I even stopped visiting the Lone Gunmen. I immersed myself in work." Mulder dropped his hands from his head and sighed dropping his eyes to the floor. "I knew I would destroy Cheryl, and she didn't deserve that." He confessed. He allowed his eyes to raise to Dana's tear-filled eyes. "I could even forgive you that. Forgive you for leaving me, betraying me, even the hurt you so callously impaled my heart. But, denying me the right I should have had to watch my children come into the world....." He stopped as his voice cracked and he shook his head in resignation of the truth. He loved her, but hated her at the same time. He breathed in deeply and without a word he turned and disappeared into the bathroom slamming the door behind him causing Dana to jump. Tears streamed down her face as she stared at the closed door. The consequences of her actions slammed into her with an overwhelming force as she realized just how badly she had hurt him. She turned and walked out of his room and down the hallway to the upper deck. Dana walked to the edge of the deck and thought for a second of throwing herself over the side. A just reward for her actions. As he had spoken to her, she could feel the cold loneliness he must have experienced. She had been safe with Bill and the twin's love while Mulder had suffered alone. She would never forgive herself for that either, she hated herself at that moment. Dana dropped her head and began to sob shaking her body all the way to her soul. Mulder allowed the warm water wash away the tensing in his shoulders and back. He felt angry at himself for taking out his frustrations on Dana so venomously. But, the anguish over took him and he could not hold back the words anymore. Samantha climbed the stairs to the upper deck. She held a coffee pot, two cups and condiments on a tray looking for Fox and Dana. She noticed Dana standing at the edge of the deck with her head slightly bowed shaking slightly. Samantha could tell she was crying. She put the tray down on the table and crossed to Dana touching her on the shoulder. Dana turned around with a start and locked eyes with her. "Dana, what's wrong?" She asked putting her arms around Dana and drawing her near. Dana put her head on Samantha's shoulder sobbed as she shook. Samantha held her until the sobs lessened. "Oh Sam, I think he hates me, and I don't blame him. I've never realized, until I saw the grief in his eyes, how much I hurt him." She barely finished as the sobs gripped her once more. Mulder dried himself still seething from the confrontation with Dana. He tried, but could not allow himself to forgive her the betrayals she had forced on him. 'Are you going to allow this to break up your newly discovered family?' The nagging voice in his mind spoke. 'Your hiding again, just like before. Is that what you want? To lead a life of bitter resentment?' The voice continued. Mulder threw the towel fiercely at the door. No, he wouldn't let her off so easily. She had to pay for what she had done to him. 'You aren't without guilt either.' The voice continued. 'Marita' entered his mind. 'This whole fiasco started by closing yourself off and seeking comfort in lies.' He recognized the voice of his psychology training trying the penetrate the stubborn resentment he held for Dana at that moment. He remembered Dana's words of what it did to her when she saw him with Marita. He remembered how he felt when he burst through the door when a disguised Eddie Van Blounht had almost kissed her while posing as himself. But, it still didn't give her the right to deny him access to his children. He pulled his clothes on while fury ran through his body. 'Go ahead, keep this anger locked inside. Allow it to steal the happiness you could have if only you could find forgiveness in that tightly held heart of yours. Then when you are alone and sad again, maybe you can find comfort inside yourself. Remember what you read about that night? Do you want to live without her?' He hated this voice and wanted to block it out. Mulder faced the mirror as he dried his hair. He caught his eyes in the mirror and for a moment saw his soul, and it frightened him. He could not break the image of utter darkness that encompassed his heart. 'Was this how he wanted to live his life?' He asked himself. Yes, Dana had betrayed him, but he had betrayed her too. He blinked and looked at himself again. He saw a lonely man staring back at him who for a few days had found love and peace. But it was threatened to be ripped away from him by his own stubbornness and unwillingness to allow the past to die and grab onto what ever the future brought to him. He realized, at that moment, he was pushing her away again as he had before. He was a desperately frightened man trying to find any reason to put a wedge between them. He dropped the hairdryer, opened the door and walked into his room. As he moved into the hallway, he could see Samantha holding Dana on the deck. He walked toward them and met Samantha's sad eyes as he approached. He motioned for her to allow him to take over comforting Dana. Samantha nodded her head and allowed him to take her into his arms. Dana almost didn't notice the transfer of bodies as she was lost in her sadness. But she smell the familiar odor of Mulder and opened her eyes and lifted her head to see him gazing into her eyes. Samantha walked back into the interior to allow them privacy. "Fox, I am so sorry for what I've done to you." Dana said after each hiccup. "I didn't realize, until I saw the look on your face, the depth my actions had on you. I know I can't ever make it up to you......" Dana broke down into sobs again crying into Mulder's chest. "Shh Shh." He tried to comfort her. "Dana.....Dana look at me." He commanded softly. She raised her red-swollen eyes to him. "Yes, you have hurt me, and I could hold it against you for the rest of my life." She blinked as he spoke in a soft comforting voice. "But, I don't want to live as I have in the past anymore. I don't want resentment, anger in my life, I want happiness, and love. He stopped as Dana's eyes grew wider. "I choose to forgive you Dana, because I couldn't bear losing Will, Sarah, Samantha, Katie.... Or-or you again." His voice trailed off. He swallowed. "But there is one stipulation." He waited for her to nod. "Don't ever do this to me again. If I do something to hurt you, come to me and tell me. Whatever you have to do to gain my attention, you can even hit me over the head with a board." Dana interrupted him, "or shoot you again," she teased between hiccups. "Well, I wouldn't go that far." He smiled, and was rewarded with a rare full smile from Dana. "I promise. If you promise me that you will not close yourself off from me." She said bringing her emotions under control, but not loosening the grip on Mulder's shirt. They locked eyes searching for the oneness they both desperately needed to connect with. Mulder leaned closer to her face. "I promise." He said as he brushed his lips over hers. "I love you Dana." He said as he claimed her mouth with his in a gentle kiss. He drew her closer as he wrapped his arms around her and deepened the kiss. Dana tightened her grip on his shirt and pulled him close to her. She felt the merging again as they connected not just with the lips, but with their hearts as well. Mulder tightened his arms around her as he explored her mouth wanting to taste the sweetness he missed. He felt his will power dwindle as the promise to Sam flew out of his mind. The only thing he could think of was Dana and wanting more than kissing her mouth. He wanted to taste all of her, but as their kiss was on the verge of becoming uncontrolled they were interrupted by someone clearing their throat. Mulder groaned to himself being interrupted yet again. He pulled away from Dana and they both inhaled much needed air. "Excuse me." Samantha said smiling. Mulder and Dana looked at her and then their eyes moved down standing next to her were Will and Sarah with curious expressions on their face. "Mommy what are you doing to Daddy?" Will asked walking toward them. Dana and Mulder looked at each other and laughed, vowing with their eyes that they would be a family, no more solitude in either of their lives. They broke eye contact and let go of each other. "I'll tell you in about 12 years son." Mulder said as he swept Will up and over his shoulder. Will squealed as his father walked toward the stairs. "Are you hungry Will?" Mulder asked, with a considerable relief in his stride. Will giggled as he rode slung over Mulder's shoulder looking back at his mother's amused face. "Yes." He answered between giggles. They started to descend the stairs and Mulder looked back at Dana. Their eyes locked and he smiled a reassuring smile at her which she returned affectionately. Then he and Will disappeared down the stairs. "Mommy, why are your eyes so red?" Sarah asked looking up at her mother. Dana picked up Sarah's slight frame. "Just emotional healing honey." Dana answered glancing at Samantha standing to the side taking in the scene before her with a pleased look on her face. "What is emo..emoinal Mommy?" Sarah asked unable to say the word. Dana tickled her daughter which caused Sarah to giggle and squirmed. "I'll tell you in about 12 years." She repeated Mulder's answer to Will. The three descended the stairs as Sarah giggled not knowing what her mother was talking about, but not caring. "Is everything okay Dana?" Samantha asked. Dana nodded her head, "I think it will be." She gave Samantha a reassuring smile as they made their way to the galley.