disjointeD poetrY

in a field in texas

in every small and open space that they can find

yellow flowers so pure and clean

push and grow and make me cry for all the beauty.

not a sopt of grass can be seen

and the flowers could never be counted

and each one cries aloud the glory and splendour and greatness

of a god so big that he can fill the emptiness in me.

nothing to say is a world of words.

fish and chips can make it sound right

plug in, unwind,

tighten up and get in tune

there are songs with out words

and words we can't express,

so simply calm down, and unwind

talk with your fingers,

sing your song with steel strings

life is beautiful when you decide for yourself that beauty is not bound by place,

but is also in memory, and hope.

can't you see that life is waiting for me?

who cares? who cares? who gives a damn if it's messed up?

don't you know? can't you see

i run with all my strength to that goal?

i want you more

the more i taste of you the more hungry i get

and i will never, never, never be satisfied

with less than all of you

satiate me, and when you do, you will satisfy me.

consume me, and when you do, you will complete me.

like a madness in my soul, the desire for you is uncontrollable.

like the ocean, which cannot be contained, the desire is bursting out.

this holy madness demands more... i want you more.

01*25*02

sometimes the other ones haunt my dreams

with the smell of cigarettes and coffee

and their vodka tasting lips

sometimes it's so real that i wake up

and thank the Lord it was a dream

but last night it was you

you without cigarettes

you without coffee

you, not with dry vodka on your lips,

but a sweeter, more satisfying draugt

and it was so heavenly and dreamlike I feared what waking meant

and waking i found that you were there

for real, for me

and i thanked the Lord

what is that?

that thing that stretches out forever,

forever covered with the clouds of gloom

foretelling dispair, suffereing, hard toil, and pain.

what is that horizon that goes on forever

with the addition of new burdens with every new step.

what is that thing?

that hope, that lies before me,

so hard to see through all the predictions of gloom

that others cast upon it?

this poem is actually in the archive of old poetry, but someone very special to me told me they liked it, so I'm adding it to the new... enjoy

the colors i love the best are the ones he does not own.

the colors i love the best are the ones he gives to me.

he hands them over with gentle care.

i crush them to my heart, i breathe them in my lungs.

i set them in the tall glass vase where they stand at attention

smiling at me, smiling at him kissing me.

poetry is yours, dear reader

it is defined and determined by you

your opinion is what makes it good or bad

and is worth a thousand times more than it's intrinsic value

12*26*01

billy idol was right

it's a nice day for a white wedding.

it's an even better day to start again.

i am always without you

you are ever never here

a moment you're gone is an eternity

i wait wait wait for you to come back

and when you do it's empty promises

you only leave again

and i stay behind waiting waiting waiting

for tomorrow when you come again.

oh i'm always without you

and each moment makes me love you more.

12*13*01

a moment ago

the rain was falling in a fury. and now it barely patters.

the tiny shockwaves so different from the ravaging downpour of

a moment ago.

i guess that's just how life is sometimes.

"the rain makes me sleepy" he said

my head was on his shoulder

"you're so lucky you're getting out of here"

oh man i just can't wait to be away from this place,

if you only knew

"pasadena must be the most depressing place to live"

i feel depressed by everything around me when i'm here

i wish i could leave it all

everyday i wish i could

i guess he might be right

he got up and did a chore in the rain

i sat and watched the rain fall

pounding pounding

pounding out a useless tirade

disappointment comes my way

knocking the parade out of my sail

raining the wind out of me

i thought that greatness was knocking

or rainbow-ing on my face

i guess i was wrong

12*12*01

a thousand pounds lighter today

that's what I call quick weight loss

i wish i could patent that feeling

when a burden falls to the floor.