Cherry Falls

This movie had potential, but like most potential, it was wasted. A movie with lots of killable teens, a giant sex party , and a psycho with an axe should have been a hit, but they fucked it up in every way, the most TnA in this movie is the picture that you see above. Thats as close as we're gonna get fellas. But the thing that really pisses me off is there were half a dozen teens who were soooo killable that were spared for some unknown reason. Most of them were bad people too! How could they survive?! 1.5 out of 5.

Characters

• Jody: Girl who escapes the killer.
• Sherrif Brent Marken: Jody's father. Gets choped up with an axe.
• Kenny: Jody's boyfriend. Has Kramer style hair.
• Mr. Marliston: Jody's teacher. She has a crush on him. Dies via gunshots.
• Tom: Principal who raped a girl when a teenager. Killed.
• Timmy: Jody's friend who is a reporter for the school paper.
• Rod, Mark, Sandy, Cindy, Ben, Sharon, and Stacy: Really dumb and pointless characters. Most of them don't even die, which makes them really useless.

The Totals

• Body Count: 8
• Weapons Used: A knife, a car door, a door, a locker, beakers, a giant plastic shark, a trophy, an axe, a picket fence.
• Random Breast Shot: 0. In a horror movie about haveing sex, you'd think there would be lots of nudity, but noooooooooo...
• Moments where characters are mysteriously unable to run from certain death: 1
• Ominous thunderstorms: 0
• Explosions: 0

Random Thoughts and Things Learned

• Teenagers are annoying.
• It's never a good thing to mix live TV with stupid teenagers.
• Orgies are death traps.