Night of the Zombies

A bad bad movie. I'm not going to go that much into it, but if you want more info, just look at all of my sarcastic remarks at the bottom. The quality of film, lighting, and doubing of this film all sucked. I never thought I'd be bored during a lengthy breast shot, but I was. It was that bad. I get a little redemption in the fact that I give it a 0 out of 5.

Characters

• Lea: Famous reporter. Knows a lot about tribes. Her tounge and heart are ripped out, plus her eyeballs are squeezed out. Talk about having a bad day...
• Vincent: Part of the 'elite soilders' (cough cough) or something. Chomped.
• Mike London: Leader of sorts. Does a pretty crappy job considering they all die. Chomped.
• Santoro: Kinda nuts. He taunts the zombies. it seems like every zombie movie has one of these. Chomp chomp chomp...
• Osborne: Another soilder type. An idiot. Chomped.

The Totals

• Body Count: 21
• Weapons Used: A knife, tear gas, guns, and a torch.
• Random Breast Shot: 1
• Moments where characters are mysteriously unable to run from certain death: 7
• Ominous thunderstorms: 1
• Explosions: 0
• Random scenes of wildlife: 15

Random Thoughts and Things Learned

• All scientists wear glasses.
• Radioactive suits are not air-tight. In fact, they are loosely worn masks.
• Radioactive zombie rats are just mean!
• Operation 'Sweat Death?' I though my job sucked! Who did these people piss off to get assigned there?
• Terrorists really don't know how to operate guns.
• Skulls are really funny.
• Tourists are really stupid.
• Zombies: The Ultimate Dominos!
• Have these people never seen a zombie movie before?
• Zombies stuff their dead victims in rafters.
• Naked women covered in paint are signs of peace.
• Where did she get that paint anyway? They're in the middle of the jungle! I doubt there's a Home Depot around.
• Maggots make a tasty treat.
• Zombies wear diapers.
• Zombies like to pose for cameras.
• Politicians are litter bugs.
• Zombies like rocking chairs.
• This is a very desolate country, so where are all of these well dressed zombies coming from?
• Never trust an elevator.
• Zombies can fly.
• Never ask a zombie for a light.