*********
“cosmic warmth”
Out of the corner of my eye
catch the faint glow
coming from her
direct attention allows
me to see the beam
is locked away
floating behind muscles, skin, and ribs
glowing and keeping her warm
when she eats
when she sleeps
when her feet
meet mine for a split second in time
the warmth reflects
and I absorb
and move around
the warmth
she smiles and walks hand in mine
for a moment in time
and all is fine
for the stars are aligned
and the cosmic warmth
creates life
so I trust their judgment
*********
“panting”
panting, I rose from the floor
went into the kitchen
she’s talking on the phone
I sit and look
she pats my head
rubs my hair
scratches my ears
she hangs up the phone
“Do you want a treat?”
I smile
and follow across kitchen
to the jar
you open the jar
I smile and remark and smile
“sit”
I smile.
“sit”
I sit.
“sit pretty”
I sit pretty.
“spin. Spin, magi”
I spin.
she gives me a treat
it tastes good
I want another treat.
I do more tricks.
I’ll do any trick
to get more treats.
*********
“angels wear robes”
angels wear robes
silver stitched gold
they line up in robes
singing
candles and holy
then they go
to God knows
where
am I
in his eyes
don’t feel quite in line
with how the stars align
tell me some
tell me some special things
and don’t you dare sing
find my only fate
so everything, for God’s sake
doesn’t always alienate
I
a girl wore skirts and thriftstore shirts
about the son of God
and everything
always alienates
I
when we communicate
don’t know how to be
don’t know what I should be
oh
those candles
they burn
flesh so fast you’d laugh
holy don’t help
I can’t help
myself
*********
“judge and jury”
journey to see judge and jury
walked into unspoken testimony
oh that leftdownward eyes at me
accessing memories
when we were friendly, cordial, and fine
what’s yours was yours
mine still isn’t mine
but I had the time
and crossed the line
don’t touch the big black robe
the witness wouldn’t condone
eyes downward to the left
at me
despite I’m in the kitchen
out of view
your unspoken testimony continues
leave us alone
leave us alone
out of her home
out of her home
no oath swore so I lie
say goodbye
escape outside
*********
“the chemistry and entropy”
red brown brown brown
enter brown
red brown
brown awkward
brown avoids eye contact with
brown
who avoids speaking to
red brown
and speaks to
brown brown
before
brown leaves
the awkward scene
leaving
red brown brown brown
back to where they were before
the chemistry and entropy
reactions sucking to cohesion
and order out of
everything
only three browns allowed
unless yellow is around
with her own brown
*********
“the death of a young woman”
the darker olive skin
of this doe’s skin
feels nice and entice
the fingertips of yours
to explore more
you resist
then relinquish
inhibitions in sedition
to the south
where a mouth moans mournfully
for the death of a young woman
so innocent and true
trustworthy and pure
her mother will be
so upset when she hears
but your hair in my fingertips
seem to fit
so fit
with it
forever and forever
now or never
never needs nor weeds
in support of never
not ever
so your hair in my fingertips
seem to fit
so fit
with it
*********
“I am gonna learn mandolin”
I.
values for variations of values
it gets so confusing sometimes
you gotta have guns to stick to
for guns have been thought through
assembled
and ready to use
at any instances necessary
II.
how can I
expect a conversation like that
with you
it’s not the way to go
I’ve forgotten
not sure what roads have changed
because these tires blow out
without smooth concrete
to meet
This is John. Emily, John.
goodbye goodbye
see you some other time
III.
where were we wandering
whenever we stopped wandering
I’ve been pondering
about a particular half-truth
I’ll misexplain to you
looking at my shoes and getting depressed
somewhere slavery accomplishment
what do I contribute to
what do I do
because I forget the days exist
IV.
I’m gonna learn mandolin
I’m gonna write this
z
and do that
and be this
and sing that
free time deprived
but more alive
with may more
to say
instead of what I read
and believe
what we value
is always true
even if survival doesn’t do
just as when an object
when divided infinitely
we perceive as nothing
multiplied and eyes
arrive at everything
beautiful
ugly
whatever adjective
suits you
*********
“rite of passage”
intensity intensifies
multiplied
and applied
to arrive at an artfull
of beauty
the combination comes
so such splendid sum
it up
to this
things are dangling all the time
they are alive
replication and variation
and you were shaped so smooth
I’m happy it works out like this
it’s time
tonight
a rite
of passage
intensity intensifies
and eyes always understand
even if
you
forget
*********
“sliding and trying [spotlight]”
snuggly up on the couch
you’re more than welcome to stay
hide those facial gestures
I already know
I’m forcing it
Which
makes it all awkward inside
magic makes me more comfortable
around such faces
in such places
why worries when
it’s been so long
I don’t know what
actions to act
sliding and trying
toward the expected spotlight
center ice
a bit to the left
and undetected amount northward
okay
I think that’s about right
correct and interject
feel rejection
injectin’
a shot
of
something
else
but it seems
to be perceived
better than believed
by me
I am the nothing into something
alive to choose its meaning
Lovely
oh so lovely
I love lovely
*********
“that lean”
that lean
and
partially perceived spherical
substances of some sort
the soul resides behind
in the heart
but the holy spirit is not what I feel
maybe I’m blind
I’ll find
nothing could fill me
because that’s not what I need
but I want
on some level
so I try to hide
behind 3-D Hindenburgs
helium blows up big
you make me lightheaded
and talkin’ funny
wow
*********
“relative empty space”
these Venn diagrams do
not slide
over
anymore
can you lift up a bit
or maybe a bit down
hard to say in empty space
what way
when relativity has its way
with us
It’s difficult
to say
something about something
*********
“because it was”
you miss some points
hits probably my misses
complimentary causing compliments
you do what you do so true
oh no you do what you do so true
spare me the similarities
I’ve seen the similarities
weary of the cold
polar similarities
don’t push together
forced away forever
there once was a sexual male
who was half-female
and every once in a while
he dreamed of moonbeams that seemed
sweeter than they could seem
because it was
because it was
because that’s what dreaming does
and awake
the sexual male
who is half-female
forgets to forget thoughts that let
him get upset
what you want you can’t get
so let the rain drain
and flush out the pain
contained in the bane
that can’t be okay
with the way
*********
“bedrooms”
bedrooms
are wonderful places to be
but there’s no way
to get anything done
because the sleeping sensation
that’s making you crazy
dominates your mind
and there’s no way
to get anything done
*********
“har”
press the keys
down the release
har
mony
drifting off sleep
this pleasantry
and I
arrive
awakening future
it seems different
I think it’s nice
nicer than before
it’s hard to tell
I cannot remember
it's so hard to tell
*********
“chlorophyll”
The trees breathe into me
the sun to see loved in leaves
loved in leaves
get your fill of chlorophyll
will
you
take what is right there
isn’t it silly
that certain tones
and certain rhythms
make your decisions
certain speeds
certainly seemed
bring the brain blissfully
arbitrarily
green
your favorite color
is your favorite color
why care why
wine and dine on starshine
look through your line of sign
especially tonight
white wisps of wishes
wander overhead
get what you want to get
why care why
when wine feels so fine
so right
tonight
*********
“blankets”
sail me somewhere
the software is already there
so
sail me somewhere
westward wind will be westward
as long as such spectacles spin
so let it spin
take it in
catch it with blankets and make it
so simple
why guess
when wind wisps west
*********
“bitter blessings”
bitter blessings between the three of us
lots of love of the lust
but it was a bust
a mere mirage mumbling Must
woman wide ready to ride
I liked
so why fight
that night
meant nothing to me
empty of anything
other than as an ignition
to transition
a sideshow intermission
hey at least it was betta dan nuttin
yet
despite repeat beeps
declaring Don’tCareDefeat
the feeling
incomplete
meeting me was misery
two times two times
I bind I bind
to karma blackholes
sucking me in
over
over
and over again
here I lie
wondering why
I
Feel fake and fine
*********
“elope to envelopes”
we elope to envelopes
to scrub off with soap
the dirt off our both
you know
Ws and Qs
are so smooth with you
with you
tries defy a why
but let’s not deny
the triumphant tries to
perceive promising paradise
your life
is lovely like
I like the reflection
in certain sections in the self
the illuminations elaborations
such a soothing sensation
your paragraph placement on the pages
perfected and precise
your life
is lovely like light
my sign
*********
“meaning of Life”
the meaning of Life
the determined definition
love ya a lot
let’s get in position
it’s all about the lines
lining it up right
don’t take it negatively
it’s a scene I want to see
I want to believe
suspend
disbelief
cutain call
curtain call
*********
“day after another”
the lips
fingers fit across hips
heartbeat
rhythmic transition
breathing-based position
skin breathes so sweet through bedsheets
to hear such sincere
smells melt
into
one
day after another
lost in a lover
as such soft sea
fills me with this
mist murmuring bliss
yes
warmth whips west
over atop the mountain crest
streams seem
to sweat down
underneath
to the East
feet meet and greet
the belief
in beauty
SPRING 2005