dextromethorphan

dextromethorphan (tussin, cough syrup, dxm, etc.)

i drank 3/4s of a bottle of cough syrup in july of 2001 for the very first time. i did this specifically because the cough syrup contained only dextromethorphan, a very extreme hallucinogenic substance. i did not know what to expect, and as a result, i received the unexpected. the effects of dextromethorphan (dxm) are organized in plateaus. the first plateau is pure euphoria. the second plateau is pure drunkeness. the third is pure dissociation. the fourth plateau is... well, undecided in terms of opinions. some say it's like being on another world, some go psychotic and end up in the hospital. the fourth plateau is similar to ketamine. so in july, i experienced a short first plateau. very little euphoria. i quickly went to a major feeling of drunkeness (losing motor skills and balance, etc.). it lasted roughly 30 minutes, until dissociation quickly came in. however, being that i had no idea what was going on, i kept blacking out. my mind did not seem to understand itself or its surroundings. i got to a very high third plateau, and almost hit fourth. i threw up in between first and second plateaus. this is the reason i didn't get higher than third plateau. being that i drank 3/4s of the bottle and my body weight isn't exactly high, i would've hit fourth. the entire effects would later haunt me until i drank cough syrup again. but the one healthy thing about dxm is the enjoyable serotonin levels you receive after you've done it. it's as if you've been "dipped in sap." the night of october 5th, 2002, i drank a little over a half a bottle of cough syrup. this would be "the best out of any dxm trips i'll ever take," to quote everyone i know who has done it. i had many advantages this time: i had eaten 3 hours prior to drinking it, i had a good night's sleep, and i drank in small amounts, instead of it all at once, like the first time. i experienced an upset stomach just after drinking, but it wore off as i slid perfectly into the first plateau. gravity became heavier, but it became fun to jump around. i felt euphoric and a bit "out of it." remarkably, the first plateau lasted for nearly 35 minutes. i remember vaguely speaking of evolution and how it's true. when the second plateau came in, i realized i shouldn't be walking around, so i layed down. thankfully, i did not vomit, which is good to get the most out of the drug, even though it's bad on the liver and stomach. i started to ramble on about whatever came to mind. i was very social for no reason. the second plateau lasted roughly 30 to 40 minutes. when i started to realize that i could not rationalize anything around me, i knew i was in the third plateau. i experienced extreme vertigo and dissociation. my consciousness was split in two. when i looked upon my life from a distance, i could not conceive that i have had a girlfriend for sixteen months and that i have been out of school for a couple of months. this became a somewhat scary thought, being that i could not see myself for who i am until the "parabola effect" (sensations of vertigo and dissociation to sensations of understanding and normalcy) kicked in. i believe i peaked around the time i heard tool music from the other room. "merkaba" was playing, and i couldn't even recognize it. this is an obvious mental split, being that i have heard that song so many times i almost know note for note. "stinkfist" was playing and i realized i was singing out loud (the parabola effect kicks in again), then came "third eye," a thirteen minute long song which seemed only five. i came to the conclusion that i was going to die soon, and that this was an entire other world not experienced by anyone. i felt a bond between tool and myself, and realized that ænima is completely within a dissociative state. that album became my theme for the night. aside from shouting out to an absent jesus, or just calling martin jesus just so he could get me a fucking cold towel, it was quite a "near-life experience." i am never doing it again. i can't come to a conclusion if it was me that i was seeing, or another world i was seeing. the next morning was filled with the "dipped in sap" feeling up until i went in the cold shower. my serotonin levels were high, and thankfully, i was alive to realize how wonderful normalcy, sobriety, and life are. i believe that my experience showed to me all the things i take for granted and how it is killing a part of my brain. well, that has all changed today.