There are things more precious than leprechaun coin...
Rainbow’s Gold
Colors of Love pt. 1 of many
by Meghan Elizabeth Brunner
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G |
adget yawned and stretched and looked around, getting the kinks out from a night of sleeping on the hardwood floor. The previous night’s wreckage was abound: an empty ice cream carton (triple-fudge-ripple) with four spoons inside. A few odd hats, one with a huge plume stirring slightly in a vagrant draft. An over-large teddy bear, a pair of swords. Aletna’s tarot card box and ouiji board, stacked neatly off to one side. Three sleeping bags; she was the last one up. She smiled, recalling the previous night’s escapades... very little could compete with the actress’ night on the stage. Only wonderfully decadent food (often in zany -- but tasteful -- combinations), and laughter, and song, and teasing, and all the wonders of comraderie... something she had grown addicted to in the past how-many months. A pleasant addiction, to be sure. It was still odd and wonderful and new; she had never had women friends before, besides maybe Foxglove and Tammy, but that wasn’t quite the same. Arms wrapped her in an embrace from behind.
“Hey-ya, Lady, sleep well?”
Gadget turned as the arms released her; the inventor’s eyes rested on a short, slight mouse with chestnut hair bound back by a scarf that matched her wild gyspsy outfit. Caprice, without question.
“Wonderfully.”
“Glad to hear it.” Aletna stepped from the shadows in a slinky, sequined black evening gown slit high up one side. Her pin-straight red hair fell unhindered down her back; she never wore it up. “Join us for breakfast? Sweet-buns and chocolate-chip pancakes, since calories still don’t exist.”
Kaleerit, right beside her, rolled her eyes. “As if thou needst worry!” It was true; Aletna was tall and trim, and had probably never had to think about a calorie in her life. Kaley, on the other hand, was slightly shorter and showed the pudge of never having cared about a calorie in her life. She wore a chef’s outfit... spotlessly clean despite its occupant’s slightly frazzled appearance.
Gadget grinned; the little stove she’d rigged up had been quite useful for the frequent over-nighters. “Okay. Be right there.” The mismatched pair nodded and departed; Kaley with a slightly appraising glance that went unnoticed.
Caprice gave her buddy a hand up; smiled ruefully at Gadget’s wince as she stood. “Your time too? My moon-blood just started yesterday...”
The blonde rolled her eyes. “Yeah. I’m due tomorrow. Maybe that’s why I’m so irritable with the boys lately... I can’t stand being in that house sometimes; everyone’s all over the place all the time. I just need some space, you know?”
“Yeah. Hey, why don’t you come spend the day at my place? Peace and quiet, I can show you my latest invention, no men...”
“Oh, that sounds terrific. I mean, I know Chip and I are supposed to be dating or something, but...” She shrugged, brushing it off. “Anyway. Come on, let’s have breakfast before we go, okay?”
“Agreed!” beamed Caprice, and arm-in-arm they walked to the greenroom, where delicious cooking smells were beginning to take up residence.
* * *
“And if you just adjust that a bit,” Gadget tweaked a screw a couple turns tighter, “it’ll stop shaking when you run it.” She stood and dusted her hands.
Caprice stood with one hand on her hip and the forefinger of the other thoughtfully tracing her eyebrow. “Huh.” She shook her head in amazement. “Gadget, I don’t know where you pick this stuff up, but I’m sure glad you do!”
“Oh, here and there... experience mostly. You’ll get there.” Gadget looked up -- her gaze caught Caprice’s and for a still moment the world stopped spinning. Or maybe started for the first time. Abruptly she shook herself.
The dark-eyed mouse chuckled lowly. “I think it takes a certain something that you seem to have the knack for... me, I can get by well enough... and ask you if I have problems,” she teased.
“Anytime,” Gadget beamed. She loved it when people asked her expertise. A realization suddenly hit her. “You never look nervous when I’m tinkering with your stuff,” she remarked in surprse.
Caprice shrugged. “I trust you.”
It took the blone inventor a bit aback; when she was on a creative bend the other Rangers avoided her workshop like Monty’s cheese-and-marshmallow surprise. She felt a warm surge of kinship to her odd friend. Caprice even seemed to enjoy talking about the technicalities... even if she didn’t know the names for half the things, she was a willing student and quick on the pick-up. Gadget gave her friend a warm hug. “Thanks.”
“You’re quite welcome,” Caprice returned, a bit taken aback herself, and reciprocated the embrace. She then held the taller mouse at arm’s length. “But I think maybe that’s enough for today; you don’t look so good.”
“I’m okay...”
“Gadget.”
“Well, maybe I’m not,” she admitted. “I just don’t let it stop me, because if I do the boys might start thinking I need special attention because I’m a woman.”
Caprice let out a slightly exasperated sigh mixed with an unmistakably fond smile. “Gadget, Gadget... they aren’t here. It’s just us. You can fall apart all you want; I don’t mind. I’ll clean up the pieces. Come on, I’ll stick in King and I and we can watch that. Your mother played Anna in that one, did you know?”
Gadget hmmmed. “I think I recall Dad telling me once, but long ago... And she sang music from it a lot.”
The other mouse nodded. “I have an idea: you know where my tapes are, why don’t you pop it in. I’ll be right back, ‘kay?”
“Kay.”
When Caprice returned, she held two cups of steaming liquid in her hands.
“What’s that?” inquired Gadget as she accepted one of the mugs.
“Raspberry leaf tea.” The brunette settled down among the abundant cushions on the floor. “It’s good for the unpleasantries of feminine plumbing.”
The inventor cocked her head quizically. “Huh. I didn’t know that.” And chuckled. “Feminine plumbing. Trust to you to call it that.”
Caprice raised her mug in a “Cheers!” salute and drained a good bit of it with one swig. Gadget could see why. It tasted awful.
The movie commenced. Gadget knew she should have expected it when Caprice stood to play the king’s part in the “Shall we Dance?” scene... it was the wacky sort of spontaneous thing the brunette was fameous for. Nevertheless, the blonde inventor was pleasantly surprised, and with a slight unaccountable blush she stood to reenact the scene.
“Well,” Caprice grinned when the music had ended.
Gadget, a bit breathless, grinned too. They were both rosy-cheeked, perhaps from exertion. “Well.”
Caprice chuckled and ducked her head, offering an arm to escort her Lady to the cushions. Gadget accepted grandly, and they collapsed into a fit of laughter.
“Ah, Caprice, come spend the night at Headquarters,” Gadget invited. “It’ll give me a good excuse to avoid the others before I start getting crabby with them.”
“What, and you won’t get crabby with me?”
“No, I don’t think I will,” she said after a moment’s reflection.
“Oh.” Caprice blinked. “Um, okay.”
* * *
“Shall we dance? (la-cha-cha)
On a bright cloud of music, shall we fly? (la-cha-cha)
Shall we dance? (la-cha-cha)
Shall we then say goodnight and mean goodbye? (la-cha-cha)
And perchance (la-cha-cha)
When the last evening star has left-”
Chip grinned as his heart’s desire waltzed by -- well, perhaps it wasn’t a waltz, but he was no expert on dance steps. “Nice to see Gadget so up-beat,” he remarked to Monterey Jack.
“Too right there,” Monty grinned, giving him a knowing nudge. Chip blushed.
Two knocks sounded on the conference room door; before anyone could blink Gadget flew by calling, “I’ll get it!”
The mouse on the other side of the door blinked when it oppened suddenly. “Good to see you too!” she chuckled.
“Where have you been? I could’ve cleaned my workshop five times by now! Well, maybe not quite five, but three, at least,” the hostess mock-scolded.
“Oh, honey, traffic was just in-sane! I was tied up in a jam for half an hour, and my cell phone was on the blink so I couldn’t even call you... I’m so sorry, I hope I haven’t kept dinner,” Caprice teased, playing the part of the tardy spouse.
Gadget tapped her foot, pretending to scowl, then relented. “Oh, all right. I forgive you this time.” And both mice broke into peals of laughter. When they had recovered slightly, the blonde siezed her guest’s hand and began hauling her to the stairs. “Wait till you see my latest invention...!”
Still chuckling, Caprice allowed herself to be towed. “Great! Oh, hi guys, bye guys!” And then she was gone up the stairs.
“Hi-bye!” the boys called after her.
“I like Caprice,” Dale approved.
Zip nodded. “Almost my size!”
Chip playfully poked the smallest Ranger. “Don’t let her hear you say that!”
“Aw, she’d prob’ly laugh,” Monty assessed, brushing off the comment. “Sweet ‘nough lass. Good ta see Gadget’s makin’ friends; she never had anybody her age when she was a kid.”
“Yeah,” Dale agreed. “And if Caprice goes into the danger-zone, maybe it means we won’t have to!” This earned him a half-hearted thwack of Chip’s fedorra. “Well, you were thinkin’ it too! I don’t see you goin’ ‘round Gadet’s workshop when she’s inventin’ stuff!”
Monty laughed again. “He’s gotcha there, Chipper me lad. Fact, he’s got all of us!”
At that moment the movie of the night came on, effectively silencing all conversation.
* * *
“Owowowowoh- darn it!” Gadget cried, trying unsuccessfully to pull a brush through her hair. “Oh, I don’t know why I don’t just cut it off! It does nothing but get in the way.”
Caprice smiled softly, went to sit behind Gadget on her bed. “I’ve made that same threat... but you know you’d never do it any more than I would. Here, give me the brush; I’ll work through it for you. Yell if I pull too hard...”
The blonde inventor handed over the brush with a sigh. “Thanks, Caprice. I suppose I deserve what I get, leaving my hair down while we were in the workshop testing my new invention...”
The brunette chuckled at the memory. “I always keep mine up for precicely that reason.... you have such beautiful hair... do you want me to put it up for you?”
Gadget shrugged. “Sure, if you want.”
A couple minutes later, Caprice flipped the braid over her shoulder. “Inverted French... thought I’d get fancy as long as I had someone’s hair to play with. I don’t get the chance on my own.”
Gadget shook her head, testing the unaccustomed weight. And sighed and melted as Caprice began to gently massage her shoulders. “Not used to being fussed over,” she murmured drowsily, giving herself to pampering.
After several minutes Caprice embraced Gadget warmly from behind. “You asleep, Lady?”
“Mmm?”
She chuckled. “Come on; I’ll tuck you in.”
More than half-asleep already, Gadget groggily crawled in bed; Caprice pulled the covers to her chin, gently kissed her brow.
* * *
He was there. Dressed in black, one with the shadows. Somewhere. Gadget could feel it as surely as she felt the terror-beat of her heart. Why could they not? Why were they smiling? Didn’t they feel the danger?
Aletna sat braced against a rock, shuffling and re-shuffling her Tarot cards, laying them out, picking them up, shuffling and re-shuffling, laying them out, picking them up, shuffling and... Gadget could feel the woman’s screams, though they never left her mouth... the screams of the caged, the cursed, the helpless, the hopeless... endless screams, though outwardly she looked as if she had been beaten to sumbission.
Mom, Dad, Gadget called, but it only echoed in her mind. Wilec held Sarah tenderly as they watched a sunset, never noticing the gathering darkness...
“Another child-”
“To act again-”
“Watch them grow-”
“Grandchildren to spoil-”
“Sunsets-”
“Sunsets-”
Gadget looked wildly to Aletna for assistance, but the flame-haired mouse was laughing hysterically, chanting a sing-song poem Gadget couldn’t make out over the blood pouding in her ears as the darkness gathered...
“Sunsets forever....”
“Sun sets forever...”
Gadget screamed but no one heard, Aletna stared through her, still laughing, the inventor was sure she saw a bit of darkness coalesce as the voices echoed madly, blending...
“Forever forever together forever to watch the sunsets sunsets sun sets...”
As if to a vortex, all light spun crazily to the sun as it toppled beneath the horizon, leaving nothing but...
Darkness.
She spun wildly to find herself mere centimeters from a mirror. She reached out to touch it.
A delicate spiderweb of cracks laced the surface before with infinate slowness the shards of silvered glass crumbled, bathed her in a shower of glittering sand. An odd chorus of voices, too distorted by echo and distance to be identified, chanted
“Ashes to ashes, dust to-”
“Forever....” those two she recognized as her parents.
Suddenly Gadget understood. The mirror... broken... They can’t- “Noooooooo!” she cried, the scream of the damned.
“Forever....”
The non-existant world trembled as winds scoured the glass dust through her fur... she did not care. It shook harder, harder...
~
“Gadget! Gadget, wake up!”
Choking on something half-scream, half-sob, the blonde tried to scramble from bed but was restrained. She struggled until the voice could penetrate consciousness...
“Shhh... Gadget, hush... you’re safe, it was a dream; you’re safe here; Caprice is here...”
She melted, weeping, into the comforting embrace, felt the older woman stroking her hair.
“Your parents again?”
She could only nod.
“Oh, Gadget...” She rocked her young friend gently until Gadget’s tears subsided, then simply held her for a long space more in the secluded stillness of the night’s wee hours.
Gadget felt herself drifting. Incredible, she thought distantly. I’m falling back asleep after I stopped crying; I don’t think I’ve ever done that... She realized Caprice was disengaging herself and stiffened. “Caprice?”
“Shhh, back to sleep, Gadget. Just making you more comfortable. You can’t sleep right sitting up.”
Gadget clasped one of her friend’s hands. “Stay. Please?”
The other mouse hesitated a moment, then nodded. “If you wish it.” She positioned herself on her back, pulled Gadget close.
The younger mouse sighed in contentment, head rested on Caprice’s heart, listening to her gentle, steady lifebeat, content just to be. The last thing she heard before slumber claimed her was Caprice’s hushed alto,
“Mellow the moonlight to shine is beginning,
Close by the window young Eileen is spinning
Bent o’er the fire her blind grandmother sitting
Is crooning and moaning and drowsily knitting....”
* * *
Gadget woke slowly, oddly warm and happy. She glanced up to see Caprice sleeping soundly, holding her. I could stay here forever... Gadget sighed blissfully, snuggling back down. She couldn’t recall the last time she’d felt so cared-for. Maybe never.
“‘Morning, Gadget.” A small hand stroked her hair.
“‘Morning.” She sat up, stretched. Caprice did likewise, then pulled herself from bed.
“C’mon, before someone comes to haul us out by our toes.”
Grudgingly the blonde left the warmth of the blankets and hastily changed into a lavender jumpsuit. Caprice donned a baggy tartan pull-over and black pants. Together they trudged down to the kitchen... Gadget with a little more spring in her step than her friend.
The kitchen was deserted... the dark-haired mouse whipped up a strange brew as Gadget slopped together oatmeal for breakfast.
“Hey, Gadget, you want some?”
“Some what?”
“The Goddess’s gift to non-morning people: mocha. It’s like cocoa, but with a kick.”
The inventor frowned slightly, scrutinizing her friend. Dark circles shadowed her eyes. “You stayed up all night, didn’t you?”
She shrugged. “Somebody had to guard your dreams.”
Gadget was knocked speachless for an instant. Then, softly, “Thank you.”
A warm smile. “You’re quite welcome. So, do you want some or not?”
“Always up for a new experience.”
Caprice smiled, concocted another mug of the coffee-cocoa hybred. And toasted her friend with a crooked smile.
* * *
“Can Gadget come out and play?” called a teasing voice; Caprice’s head poked around the workshop door.
The inventor grinned. “Capsie! I didn’t hear you come in!”
“Quiet as a mouse,” she chuckled. “The boys let me in. It’s almost dark; you want to go to a drive-in?”
“Okay. What’s playing?”
“Dragonheart... it looks really good. I’ve got some chocolate to enhance the experience.”
Gadget chuckled. The woman was as much a chocoholic as Dale! “Just let me get cleaned up, okay?”
Caprice nodded. “I’ll be waiting....”
Minutes later the Rangerwing took to the skies, Caprice grinning like a maniac.
“You want to try flying?” the pilot offered.
“Me?” she squeeked.
“Yes, you!”
“Um... okay...” Gingerly she took the copilot’s wheel... when a few minutes passed and she hadn’t crashed yet, Caprice relaxed enough to really enjoy it.
Gadget smiled slightly... Caprice reminded Gadget of herself the first time her father had pulled her up on his lap to fly the Screaming Eagle...
* * *
“Hey, cut it out, Capsie! I’ll crash!” Gadget giggled. “It’s bad enough I’m flying one-handed!”
“Aw, you? Never!” the actress leaned over and fed her another chocolate leftover from the movie. They’d thrown most of the wrappers at the dippy prince... missing, of course; the screen was too far away to think they’d make contact. “You’re too much like your dad for that.”
“You... you really think so?”
Caprice squeezed her hand. “I’d never say it if it wasn’t the truth.”
The inventor hushed a moment. “Thank you.” Then, with an impish look in her eyes, she let go with her other hand and fed her companion one of the sweets.
“We’d better get home and make something healthy to eat before we’ve both got a sugar buzz, if we don’t have one already,” laughed Caprice. “Scones or something.”
Gadget smiled fondly at the memory of the morning she was introduced to mocha... After finishing their oatmeal they’d laughed their way through making scones... Caprice was almost as dangerous in the kitchen as Dale! Mid-morning snack had consisted of the pastry and tea on the balcony. “I would like that. Except... this time, let’s put in chocolate chips.”
Caprice groaned. “Look at me! Corrupting the innocent! I’m a bad influence on you, Gadget.”
“Oh, I don’t mind,” she admitted cheerfully, squeezing her friend’s hand. “I need more bad influences like you, I think.”
Caprice sighed with a rueful shake of her head... and a smile. And fed Gadget another chocolate.
* * *
The tree looked the same as ever, a sprawling, gnarled oak, more like a strong, gentle protector than anything out of a horror movie. How many times did I pass it, maybe pass Caprice, and never know it? Gadget pondered. Tree and mouse suited each other well, both radiated that wonderful simple serenity... something she had come to seek more and more lately. Her mind flashed back to Headquarters: all four boys fighting loudly over which T.V. show to watch; they’d flipped on the lights as soon as the sky had begun to tinge with oncoming night. She remembered hiding in her room or workshop so often those first few weeks at H.Q., wondering if she’d ever hear daytime silence again. The old longing had returned, only now she knew where to find it.
A swift climb later, the inventor had the doorknocker poised on dropping when in her periphery she saw a slight, cloaked form. She leaf-stepped forward, trying not to disturb her friend.
Caprice unclasped her cloak as she stood, welcomed Gadget into the warm, dark folds as they sat back down, snuggled together for heat and companionship. Light from the nearly-full moon scattered between the treeleaves; Gadget caught her breath... Caprice seemed a brave, beautiful heroine out of some Celtic legend, fur glowing like a moonflower in the cold, clear moonlight, hair blown and outdoorsy-mussed from the wind, eyes dark, glittering patches of sky. She traced the dark smudges beneath them. “What happened?” she whispered.
“Bout with my muse last night,” she murmured in reply. “I am
mortal, she is not. I need sleep, she does not. She gets an idea that keeps
her up, I get no sleep. Began to wonder if the false day inside was confusing
her, so I came out here to watch it get dark. So she’d know.” Caprice shrugged.
“The price I pay for my art. Isn’t the first time and won’t be the last.”
“But you’re so tired....” marvelled Gadget. “I can.... feel
it... in you, how tired you are... you need sleep.”
Caprice shook herself slightly; she’d been nodding a bit. With a yawn, she nodded.
“I make a good pillow,” Gadget offered, almost shyly, and patted her lap.
The author gave her an indecypherable look for the span of three heartbeats, but smiled as she cuddled close and rested her weary head on her own personal pillow. In silence they soaked in the Lady’s soothing radiance, letting their breath blend with the winds, their life-beats blend with the earth, their dreams meld with the stars, imprinting the eternal moment on something more fragile than time, though neither could say precicely what.
When Gadget looked again Caprice was sleeping soundly, a feather of a smile traced across her lips. She looked peaceful as the grass-whisper and hushed crickets, a spot of star-mist with tangled skeins of night for hair. Tentatively the blonde smoothed some wayward strands to their rightful place, almost afraid Caprice would disappear at the touch. The woman-mouse smiled and stirred slightly, but did not waken and certainly did not disappear. With a fond smile Gadget lifted her friend, and blinked a bit in surprise; she knew working with machinery had made her stronger than most girls, but it was like carrying Zipper almost... Caprice was even lighter than she looked!
The bedroom was only a short trek away, and after she gently placed the writer in bed, Gadget lingered longer than she strictly needed to, reluctant to leave. Caprice shivered slightly and curled in on herself more; Gadg seized the opportunity to curl up spoon-fashion around the petite mouse. She stirred again, and the dream-guardian pulled her close, singing a cradle-song she’d heard long ago:
“Hush, now my darling, no reason to cry;
I will sing you a sweet lullaby
Go to sleep, darling, no reason to fear,
For all through the night I’ll be here.
I’ll round up the moon for your pillow,
A blanket of stars for your bed.
I’ll round up a dream of tomorrow
To ride towards the good times ahead
The cyote’s singing this day to an end;
The rocking-horse trail waits around the next bend.
So go to sleep, darling, no reason to fear,
For all through the night I’ll be near,
Loving you, holding you ever so dear,
And all through the night I’ll be here.”
Interlaced with singing and reassuring murmurs when Caprice’s dreams grew fretful, Gadget gazed at her snugglebuddy, fascinated, heart near bursting with something akin to the bond of sisterhood she felt with all her women friends, but infinitely stronger.
When the Land of Dreams claimed Gadget, her last vision was of Caprice in the just-dawning light.
* * *
I’m wearing a dress! It was the first thought to register in Gadget’s reeling mind. Somehow it seemed that the abundant pearl-sewn white satin shouldn’t surprise her. She sensed her mother behind her; had she just said something? Her father was in the house. Monterey and the others as well, she supposed, though it was more of a vague impression than a coherent thought. She glanced up from her full skirts and Caprice, decked out in a navy blue suit with almost imperceptible lighter blue pinstripes, smiled back dazzlingly, as warmly as the sun on her face....
~
Alone.
Gadget blinked lazily in the sunlight and stretched, bringing the tatters of her mind into one semi-functioning sleep-laden mass. She seemed to recall an odd dream... had she been preparing for a handfasting? Hmmm. Time for that later. Her stomach agreed heartily. I slept in my clothes. I never do that. Then why....? Oh, yeah. Caprice. Now I remember. Still only half-functioning and thinking rather fondly on a cup of mocha, the inventor followed Caprice’s vibrant, enthusiastic rendition of “Whiskey You’re the Devil” to the kitchen. Only a Celt would sing drinking songs over breakfast preparations.
Caprice turned as her friend entered, sunlight painting auburn highlights on her unbrushed chestnut-brown hair. The backlighting made wayward strands freefloating around her head glow like holy light. She grinned broadly.
In the back of Gadget’s mind somewhere, something whispered, I want to wake up to this every morning forever. I love her. Another part blinked, pondered, and nodded. I love her.
Oh, the rest of her thought. They seemed so distant, those thoughts. Not really a part of her at all. She was having trouble formulating an appropriate response. “This can’t be possible” was ruled out -- logically it had to be possible because she knew she loved Caprice, knew it more certainly than anything she’d ever known. Even though she’d never heard of such a thing, it had to be so. She wasn’t really sure what it meant, what the implications would be. I can’t tell Caprice, that thought floated through her mind, but it seemed obvious enough that it didn’t bother to attach itself to anything. Hmmm. This would require some thought. “Oh” seemed quite satisfactory for the moment.
The brunette set a bagel with melted cheese on it before Gadget, cupped the blonde’s hands around a steaming mug of mocha. “You look like you really need this.” She lightly ruffled Gadget’s hair with a fond smile. “Stayin’ up all night to guard my dreams, what were ya thinkin’?”
She touched me. I love her. Oh. Gadget took a sip of her mocha, hoping it would break her out of whatever numb lock had captured her.
Caprice gently pecked the top of Gadg’s head before sitting down to her own mug of mocha. Which she apparently either didn’t need or had downed it’s predecessor. “It was very sweet of you, though.”
She kissed me. I love her. Oh.
“So, what are your plans for the day?”
“Oh, I dunno. I should probably spend some time at Headquarters before they start thinking I’m mad at them or something. How about you?” I love her. Oh.
Caprice nodded. “I should probably do some cleaning around here; the place is getting to be a pigsty. No offense to pigs, of course.”
Gadget smiled faintly and finished off her mocha, waiting for the buzz to hit. She started in on the bagels.
Capsie gently traced the circles under Gadget’s eyes. “Promise you’ll take a nap when you get home? You look exhausted, and even the mocha doesn’t look like it’s doing much for you.”
Gadget laughed unsteadily, trying not to flush at her friend’s touch. Trying not to burst into tears. “Yeah, sleep. Definately. I must be out of practice... all-nighters didn’t used to get to me like this.” Oh, Capsie, you don’t know the half of it!
The rest of the meal passed in the relative silence of munching and occasional smalltalk. After she helped clean up, Gadget departed for headquarters with several admonitions from Caprice to take care and get some rest.
The inventor blinked; her hand was on the front doorknob of Ranger H.Q. but she didn’t recall getting there. Must be more tired than I thought. Going to go to bed cold and alone. Wish Caprice was here. I love her. Oh. I’m supposed to love Chip but I don’t; I love her. Gadget shook herself firmly. Stop that. You’re going to go in there and pretend nothing is different. Nothing. She opened the door and stepped inside to emptiness. And, though it was not her custom to do so, she flipped on the television and set her brain to Zombie, hoping to avoid thought. Sleep deprivation began to catch up... the dialogue went by in a slightly coherent blur for a time and then all was nothing....
Dreams. Chasing relentlessly, light and sound and color and joy and terror and trepidition and tears and memories replayed in variation and that horrible engulfing
Darkness.
Gadget lept from bed with an inarticulate cry more than half-choked with sleep. She stood, staring about, trying to make sense of her surroundings but not paying complete attention. A frenzied train of logic thumped through her mind like a pogo stick on drugs: I can’t hurt Chip like that. I just can’t. Caprice probably doesn’t even care, not that way. But I don’t love Chip. Not like that. It was just shock and relief at having him home. He’s a good friend, and I like having him in the same house, but I don’t want to marry him. I don’t want to kiss him. I don’t want to have his kids. I want to have Caprice’s. She paced the room twice and restlessly ran a hand through her hair. Love must be a form of madness, she thought as she strode out the door. No sane person would put herself through this.
In the conference room she encountered the others amidst a high-spirited game of cards.
“Have a nice nap, Gadget?” Dale asked. “Monty carried you upstairs so we wouldn’t wake you up...”
Gadget blinked; her change of scenery hadn’t even brushed her mind. She forced herself to smile. “Yeah. Thought I’d take a walk before the weather gets bad... it’s supposed to really pour for the next few days. I shouldn’t be gone long.” There. That’ll insure I have to come back; if I don’t, it’ll worry the boys.
Zip nodded. “Have fun!”
The inventor smiled and quietly let herself out. She leaned against the door for a moment, eyes squeezed tight against reality, then strode off purposefully, though without direction. She looked up; her star was shining. She followed it to the fountain and sat near the water... it always made her think of her parents, though she wasn’t sure quite why.
“There I am in younger days, star gazing,
Painting picture-perfect maps of how my life and love should be
Not counting the unmarked paths of misdirection
My compass, faith in love’s perfection
I missed ten million miles of road I should have seen....”
What little she recalled of “Love’s Recovery” (Indigo Girls, naturally) trailed off, the last line as wavery as her vision, as tear-laden. Gadget wept for all she was worth, for all the things that could never be. A horrible, sufocating tightness rose from her feet to her heart, encasing her in stiffling pain of the soul.... she ran. And ran.
“You okay, Gadget?” asked Chip as she nearly bowled into him on her way though the conference room.
“Inspiration strikes again!” she called without turning and cloistered herself in her workshop, bolting the door behind her. She didn’t want Chip there. Especially not now.
The inventor hardly noticed when the rain began, except for the offhand thought, Caprice likes to dance in the rain.
* * *
Gadget dropped her hammer wearily; it produced a dull thud as it connected with the table. She wandered, near collapse, to the nest of blankets she’d tossed in one corner for a bed. Cold and lonely, she curled into a ball in an attempt to convince herself the world didn’t exist. It didn’t work. She wasn’t surprised, and could feel only a mild gratitude that insomnia had spared her more dreams...
With a groan she hoisted herself out of bed, largely incoherent but miserable anyhow. The sun’s rays were just beginning to cast a friendly sort of warmth through the room... she remembered the same rays backlighting Caprice’s shining beauty and smiled at the thought before she realized what she was doing. The room looked abruptly grey and cheerless. Why didn’t I see it then? Why didn’t- She cut her line of thought off. She blearily rubbed at her eyes. I smell like warm saltwater. Grumbling protests griped at her from a certain neglected stomach. How long have I been up here? Gadget had vague recollections of the boys trying to coax her down for dinner, of Caprice trying to get her to join the actresses for a romp somewhere, of Monty finally leaving food outside the door (several times) when she wouldn’t come out... It had the feeling of being spread over time, but she couldn’t honestly say how much. Not that it really matters. Hopefully, hopefully, no one is up yet. Maybe I can grab breakfast and retreat back here before anyone realizes.
No such luck.
All four of the boys had beat her to the kitchen; Chip, Dale, and Zipper were sitting around the table as Monty puttered mechanically about the cooking area. None looked as if they had seen much sleep the night before, but Gadget did not comment. She couldn’t even take care of herself; what right had she to try mothering the others? She accpeted a steaming cup from Monty with a nod and murmured “Thank you.” Her eyes flew wide at the first sip.
“C’ffeene,” Dale muttered thickly. “Gisommere.”
“Too hot for ya, luv?” the large mouse fretted.
“This isn’t tea...” she murmured.
“Mocha,” offered Chip. “I thought you liked...”
With a wordless cry Gadget threw the cup across the room; it shattered and fell in a heap of shards on the floor; beige-tan liquid bled down the wall. By the time the other Rangers had processed this much, Gadget had sprinted from the room. Monty followed as soon as he had recovered.
He found Gadget in her room, throwing things helter-skelter into a couple bags, countenance already streaked with tears. “Luv, where -”
“Have to go home, until it goes away, or gets better, or -” she cut off with a stiffled sob. Or until I can turn around without being reminded of Caprice.
Monterey Jack caught her by the arm as she hussled past, bag in each hand and one over her shoulder. “Ye can’t fly like you are. Ye’ll crash for sure. Let me take you home. I promise I’ll stay out of yer way. Ye won’t even know I’m there. Jus’ let me be sure ye get there safe.” As she looked up at him, Monty was reminded of nothing so much as a wounded wild animal, hypnotized by the soft words of a human. He hated the analogy. She nodded slowly. He gingerly took the two bags and allowed her to lead the way. She gathered a few things from her workshop and slid down the tireslide, Monty silent in her wake.
Chip, Zipper, and Dale watched with questionmarks painted on their faces as the procession walked out the door. Monty peered back around, whispered just loud enough for them to hear, “Keepin’ her safe, mates, makin’ sure she don’t do nothin’ she’d regret -- or we would. Not that she would, of course, but... Just keep the kanagroo tied down for us, ‘kay, mates?”
They nodded dumbly; Monty gave them the thumbs-up before slipping back out. The door clicked behind him.
When he reached the Rangerwing, the Aussie found his charge sitting demurely in the copilot’s seat. Not daring to say anything for fear it might send her into gales of tears -- who knew what had caused it the first time? -- he silently piloted the craft to the old discarded plane that had been home to Wilec and Gadget -- and Sarah, too, so long ago.
Gadget stepped out of the Wing and breathed a sigh of relief... oh, there were ghosts in her old home, all right... but they were comfortable, familiar ghosts, like a pair of well-worn fuzzy slippers. They hurt sometimes, true, but it was the dull, aching pain of a wound with time to mostly heal. They were a comfort from the sharp, bright pain of memory-ghosts with Caprice. Here she was safe. Here, Caprice had never been. Here, maybe sleep would finally come, in the bed that had cushioned her dreams for the first seventeen years of her life. She smiled vaguely and wandered off to curl up with her teddy bear.
And sleep for the next sixteen hours.
* * *
“Gadget? Luv?”
Groggily she pulled herself through layers of sleep and opened her eyes. Monterey Jack sat gingerly on the edge of her bed, almost as if poised to run at a moment’s notice. It looked odd on him.
“Mmmm?” she managed, rubbing sleep from her eyes and levering herself to sit up. Hopefully it would be eaiser to stay awake positioned so.
“You up to a visitor?”
She inwardly preyed it would be Zipper; she wasn’t sure she could deal with either of the boys at the moment. Especially not Chip. Admitting as much would scare the cheese out of Monty, though, so she nodded. He brightened a little, gave her hand a squeeze, and padded out.
A few moments later, the door tentatively swung open a bit. A slight, chestnut-haired form slipped into the room and clicked the door shut behind her. “Oh, Lady,” she murmured, sympathy radiating from her as she strode forward with open arms.
It was more than Gadget could bear. She burst into silent tears. “Go away,” she choked out.
Caprice halted, gaping, as if struck. “What?” she asked quietly, eyes wide. “Why? Gadg, what’s wrong? You’ve always let me in, even after Hadrian-”
“I never loved Hadrian,” she muttered.
“Still, it can’t be any worse than that! Unless...” she paled. “By the Twain, Gadget... no man has... taken after you against your will.... Lord and Lady, if one has, I’ll have his -”
“No! It isn’t that!”
She looked markedly relieved. “Then what? Whatever it is, Lady, we can get through it together. We’re pals! I’ll always be there for you, you know that. Is it the dreams? Maybe if I sing you to sleep...”
Gadget crumpled as if stabbed. I could wish nothing more.... “I’ll be fine. Just leave me be,” she gritted.
Caprice looked on the verge of tears herself. Caprice never cried. “Gadg, what is it?” she asked, anguished. “Did I do something? Tell me, I’ll make it right, I promise, I-”
“Just get the hell out, goddammit!” Gadget shrieked, pitching her goggles full force at the woman. Can’t you see I’m just protecting you? I have to make you go away, whatever it takes! What would you think if you knew the truth?!
Caprice caught the goggles without thinking about it and stood, shocked, for half a moment before bowing her head and woodenly staggering out.
The door clicked softly.
Gadget buried her face in her teddy bear and sobbed herself to sleep, holding it close, pretending it was Caprice.
* * *
“Hey, luv, how’d it- what happened to you?” he cut off, getting a good look at Caprice’s face. He fought down a tide of panic. “What’s wrong with Gadget?!”
Caprice managed, “I think she just needs some time alone, Monty. Excuse me...” she continued down the hall as if she wasn’t quite sure how to walk.
Monty caught up to her, turned her to face him. “Caprice, we both care about Gadget. A lot. What happened in there?”
She shrugged, couldn’t meet his eyes. “She sent me away. Wouldn’t even talk to me. Threw these at me when I didn’t move fast enough to suit her.” Her words sounded bitter, but Monty could hear the pain in the young woman’s voice. He gave her a quick hug, and gentle -- she was even smaller than Gadget, and he always secretly worried he might break her if he squeezed too hard.
“Ah, I wouldn’t worry about it so much. She gets in these moods sometimes, doesn’t want anyone around. Even when she was knee-high to a knee, she did it. It’ll pass; you’ve just gotta wait her out, ‘kay, luv?” he tried to make it sound believable. It was the truth... mostly, anyhow.
Caprice nodded, and if she wasn’t comforted Monty decided he never wanted to play cards opposite her. “Maybe I should go home now,” she said.
He waved the suggestion off. “Truth be told, it’d be nice if you’d stay. Gets a mite lonesome when she takes to herself; I wouldn’t mind having someone about to talk to. And if something takes a bad turn and she needs attention fast -- not that I’m sayin’ it’ll be like that -- I sure could use an extra set of hands.”
Caprice nodded. Monterey Jack had never seen such an expression as hers that moment -- joy, stubbornness, loyalty, and stark terror.
* * *
When Gadget awoke, the house was still and dark. Rain-patters whispered against the window, inviting. She stared out the window from the protection of her bedclothes for a time, then groggily pushed herself out of bed. Just as long as I don’t have to sleep anymore. I’m so tired, still... kept waking up in the middle... the dreams... She shook herself firmly. Just that: dreams. Not real. She shivered. No, not at all real.
Heedless of the rain she trudged out the back door, head bent against the lashing tendrils of water. She didn’t need to see where she was going. She’d been there enough times that her feet could carry her without thought. There, briefly backlit by a flash of lightning: The Tree. She settled beneath branches that kept off most of the rain... only an occasional drop plopped from an overhead leaf. She ran her hands over the cold, wet stone and sighed at how little comfort it was capable of giving. Her fingers instinctively traced the epitaph: “Wilec Hackwrench. Our lives will never be the same without him.” And absently drew down the scar across her left palm. She looked up to the tree... she knew it held the years of her mother’s life etched in its bark, along with her father’s... both their names carved so long ago in that arrow-pierced heart... and the little one below it that read “Trieanne Namid.” She no longer knew how much of the moisture on her cheeks was from the rain, how much from her heart... or, what was left of her heart, anyway.
“Do you know me?” she whispered, almost afraid to be heard. “I am your daughter. I’ve come home, but... do you know me?”
An agonizing pause, with only heaven’s tears to answer. Then, “Do I know me?” Suddenly it seemed rediculous to ask her parents if they knew her... how could they know if she did not? Yet, there was this childish desire, for them to know, to have always known, to have just been waiting for her to discover it so they could say, “Oh, yes, you have found yourself, bluebird. We had wondered when you would get about to it.” They were her parents. Somehow they had to know. Only now, she could never tell them, they could never answer... and for all her talking to their pictures and imaginary conversations, she suddenly felt very cold and alone and hollow. The wind blew away her spirit as tears ravaged her love-torn heart. She could feel everything that was her depart on the gust, leaving only her body alive.
“Do you love me anyway?”
* * *
“Monterey Jack!!!” The voice teetered on the raw edge of panic... high and thick with the beginnings of frightened tears.
The Aussie tumbled from the guest bed and threw wide his bedroom door. Caprice stood without, fist raised to bang on it again. She siezed his hand, dragging him to the back door. Water streamed from her clothes and hair, creating wet puddles in her wake. She did not notice.
“Now wait jus’ a blumin’ minute-!” he protested groggily.
“No time,” the actress panted. “Gadget needs you now, pajammas or not!”
“Wha-? Luv, you’re not makin’ a whole lotta sense...”
“I woke with first light, went to check on her. She wasn’t there. I searched all over, finally found her ... must’ve been out half the night at least...” Caprice’s voice caught. “She’s so wet, and it’s so cold out there, and she won’t wake up, and I can’t get her inside by myself....”
Monterey’s stomach dropped. “Where did you say you found her?” he asked, though he didn’t need to be told.
“Under some tree... hurry up!”
Monty didn’t reply... he’d never heard the girl’s voice so near panic before. Within instants he was dragging her to the tree... he halted ten paces away, dropping Caprice’s hand. And proceeded at a dead sprint.
Gadget was huddled there, shivering and drenched... and curled protectively around something Monty had seen but once before. That once had been enough. “Gettin’ yerself killed here ain’t gonna help ya, Gadget, whatever it is yer runnin’ from, it ain’t gonna make it better,” he murmured as he stripped off his trenchcoat, gently pried her from the block of stone and wrapped her in the enormous garment. At as close to a run as he dared chance with the slippery grass, Monterey Jack carried the inventor back to the beat-up old warplane that was her home, Caprice close on his heels.
“I’m gonna fix some tea an’ maybe soup for her, an’ get outta these wet clothes. Take care of her till I’m back?” Monty asked as he tenderly placed the wrapped mouse in her bed. Caprice nodded absently, rattling off a list of herbs with the post-script of, “in the tea.” The Aussie nodded briefly and left.
When he returned, it was to find Gadget in dry clothes and tucked snugly in bed -- how Caprice had managed either was beyond him -- and her caretaker streaming water as she knelt dutifully beside Gadget.
“Caprice?”
“Mmm?” she looked up; Monty wasn’t sure if she was with him or not.
“Caprice. Yer clothes’re wet. Put somethin’ dry on; ye won’t do Gadget any good if ye catch somethin’.”
“Right...” she said distantly, rising, and wandered off.
Monterey shook his head slightly, puzzling at the girl, though soon turned his attentions to more pressing matters. Gadget still shivered; he found another thick blanket and heaped it atop those already there. When he again looked up, his jaw fell slack in astonishment.
Caprice stood at the door in what was unmistakably one of Sarah’s nightgowns... soft light-blue velour with cream lace at the cuffs, collar, and hem. It was markedly longer on Caprice, but there could be no doubt. One of Wilec’s favorites on her, Monty noted with a sort of distant objectivity.
The actress shrugged uncomfortably. “Nothing of mine was clean, and this was the only thing I could find that wouldn’t eat me up and swallow me whole.”
Gadget chose that moment to wake. “Mom....?” she questioned blearily.
The astonishment and dismay that crossed the other female’s face were gone so fast they almost might not have been. Only that instant she hesitated before ghosting to the shivering girl’s side. “Here... I’m here...”
Monty almost choked. When she pitched her voice just right, Caprice gave a dead ringer of Sarah’s hushed comfort. Of course, it had been a while, but...
The blond smiled faintly, unclasped something from behind her neck. Caprice watched, hypnotized, as she drew forth a crystal necklace with a unicorn etched in it. “I kept it safe... till you could come back, I kept it safe for you...”
“And you did a wonderful job of it, my love,” Caprice answered, a bit in shock, and clasped the proffered gift around her own neck. There was precious little else she could do. “Come, now, drink some tea... it will help warm you... That’s my girl...”
* * *
Monty peered around the doorframe of Gadget’s bedroom. Caprice struck him, for a moment, as an odd Joan d’Arc as she knelt at the mouse’s bedside, face pale and strained from worry, dark hair a hap-hazard cascade down her back, eyes shadowed from lack of sleep but bright with something very akin to madness, perhaps an odd holy bargain with some god to let Gadget live in exchange for her martyrdom. He shook his head. Know I need me some sleep when fancies like that start takin’ me, he chuckled wryly. Still, the likeness was uncanny. He cleared his throat.
“Uh, luv, you need some sleep... it’s been a day and a half already. She’s out of danger. If she was gonna get sick she would’a done it by now. You can’t go forty-eight without sleep or I’ll have to take care o’ both o’ ya.”
She sighed wearily. She was wearing her old clothes again. “I can’t sleep... it just won’t come, not until she wakes up and recognizes me...”
“Eat something, at least...”
“I can’t. Every time I think of-” she cut off, looking distinctly ill.
Monterey had the sinking sensation he was too late.... he nonchalantly toussled Capsie’s hair with one hand, just happened to linger a moment on her brow.
“No, I don’t have a fever, if that’s what you’re after, Monty,” she chuckled mirthlessly.
“But luv... hate ta say it, but... you don’t look so good.”
“I’m just so sick of this cherade...” she whispered, then shook herself. “There’s no point in both of us being up, Monty. Go to bed... I’ll fetch you if I get tired enough to sleep...”
He was never sure why, but he nodded and left without a fuss... after all, her words did make some sort of sense.
* * *
“Hmmm?”
Caprice hauled herself back from a mind-wander and rose from the bedside chair... had she been drifting? She was so tired... What time was it, anyway? Must be going on three in the morning....
“What is it?” Caprice asked tenderly, softly, kneeling.
“Will you still love me? Forever, no matter what?”
“No matter what.”
“Even...”
“Even what?” Gentle, coaxing.
“Even if I’m... I’m very different from everyone?”
“You’ve always been very different from everyone. You’re special. Don’t ever forget that.”
“And...”
“And?”
“And still, forever and ever?”
“Forever and ever and ever and ever.” She kissed Gadget’s brow. “And ever.”
Gadget smiled sleepily. Her hand sought out Caprice’s, held to it. “Just checking.”
Caprice squeezed her friend’s hand. “And ever and ever and ever...”
“And ever,” Gadget replied contentedly, drifting off.
“And ever and ever...”
A single tear crept its way, unnoticed, down the brunette’s pale cheek to land on their interlaced fingers.
“And ever...”
* * *
Softly, softly Monterey Jack opened Gadget’s bedroom door. And stood mutely a moment, absorbing the tableau before him... Caprice was seated on the floor, head pillowed on crossed arms that rested on the bed; she’d fallen asleep at her post from sheer exhaustion. Gadget was also asleep, curled on her side, facing Caprice. Each reached to clasp the other’s hand, tender gesture frozen in the folds of dreams...
He lightly kissed Gadget’s brow. She looks peaceful now. Whatever Caprice did, it sure worked. Poor luv, must not've slept the whole time. Needs some decent rest, an' if she stays like that she ain't gonna be able ta move when she gets up. Gently he disengaged their hands; Gadget wimpered slightly, but Monterey’s hushed soothings lulled her to tranquility. Caprice did not stir at all, not even when he scooped her up and carried her to the guest bed, then gently tucked her in. He padded to the couch Caprice had so often insisted on for her bed and settled down to sleep.
When he awoke, there was a note tacked to the refrigerator with a pineapple magnet:
Don’t tell her.
-C.
Caprice’s few belongings were gone; the unicorn crystal pendant was on Gadget’s bedside table. He didn’t understand, but he knew he didn’t need to. Monty crumpled the note and set fire to it in the kitchen sink. He watched the fire consume it, consume itself, until only ash and memory remained to prove the brunette’s existence. Monterey Jack turned on the faucet and watched, perplexed and a little sad, as the water swirled around the char and effortlessly dragged it away.
* * *
Gadget paused, softly closed the door behind her without truly noticing. Caprice was stage center, singing a haunting, doleful Celtic ballad of unrequaited love to a non-existant audience, wrapping her in the warm mist of a summer’s evening. Goddess, she was beautiful. Her chestnut hair tumbled past her waist in a rippling cloud, patches set to an auburn sunset by the stagelights. Her trim figure... Gadget stopped herself, the heat of an ember rising in her cheeks. She had never thought that way before, not with Hadrian, when she had been engaged. Not even with Chip, who loved her so much. Oh, she knew well enough what one did with a man; it had just never sparked any interest. Kissing Hadrian had scared her, but there had been a sort of fascinating, horrible danger to it; kissing Chip had been like kissing a brother, as she’d discovered right after her illness, and she’d prefered cuddling on the sofa while watching the late show. Oh, sure, she’d kissed them both, but mostly from a sense of duty. But Caprice... she had no idea what one woman did with another, or if it was even possible to do anything... if it was even possible to love... well, that at least had to be posible. She was the proof, even if she was the only one in the world.
She shook herself firmly, knowing she should leave. Now. Before Caprice saw her there, before she could ask questions Gadget dared not answer. Before any number of things. But she could not pull herself away from her love’s rich alto, snaring her in its fireside depths... The most she could manage was to creep into the greenroom and huddle on the floor, knees tucked under her chin. She left the door slightly cracked so she could still hear... Indigo Girls, showtunes, Tori Amos, haunting Celtic tunes of sorrow, and some from the taverns, and some from nowhere at all... Gadget sat and listened to what she strongly suspected was the actress’s entire repretoire. Gadget had come to be where her parents had lived and loved, to perhaps find them through the magick of the stage, to ask them why, to ask them how, to ask them if they still loved her... but why had Caprice come?
No sooner had the thought fled her mind than the petite mouse strode in, as if purpose could mask thought and emotion. Gadget had a brief instant to recognize it as her own stride of late. Caprice paused, a wash of emotions flitting across her visage before her expression stilled. She knelt beside her friend, so gently brushed away tears Gadget had not realized she’d shed. The blonde closed her eyes, head bowed, could not look at Caprice for fear of what might show in her eyes... the woman was entirely too good at reading her.
Caprice smoothed her friend’s hair gently, sang leafshadow and hushed, “Oh, girl, will you ever learn? You’re just an empty cage, girl, if you kill the bird.” Then, after an agonized pause, “Gadget, tell me.”
She laughed bitterly. “You would never guess.”
Coaxing, “I might surprise you.”
“You have already.”
“Then even if you did surprise me with something you think I cannot guess, we would be even.” Caprice sat on her heels, waiting.
“I don’t know if you can believe it. I don’t know if I believe it, and you can tell me you never want to see me again,” she trembled slightly at the thought, but plowed on, “you can -”
“Gadget,” she said softly, but it cut into the flow of words like a pen’s nib into paper: softly, creating without destorying. She said no more.
Almost inaudibly, almost broken, “I love you.” Gadget braced herself for the explosion of her heart, for the schrapnel to rip through her soul.
It did not come.
Gadget looked up. A single tear had etched an unnoticed trail on Caprice’s visage. She was weeping. Caprice, who never cried before anyone... Gadget felt a fierce pride, a fierce protectiveness, a fierce sense of loss. She wanted to take this woman in her arms, comfort her, but could not, did not deserve to, after what she had done... The inventor drew breath to launch into a tirade of repentance.
And was waylaid.
Simply, “I love you.”
Gadget shook her head. “No, you have it wrong. You don’t understand. You -”
Of all the unlikely things, the woman laughed! Her eyes laughed too, softly, suede on moss. She pressed fingers to Gadget’s mouth to still words. Caprice pulled away slightly, kneeling before the sky-eyed mouse, a hush filling the space between them. Caprice drew close, gently kissed her. Gadget, surprised, held to her.... when they parted she could not breathe for the quiet ember in the other mouse’s earth-eyes. Caprice sang, then, traping Gadget with apt words more effective than iron:
I thought the time was past when I could find beauty in the words
I set the stage and the scenery, rehearsing every word
And when I tried to make it more, it was always less
And there’s a thin line beween pleasing yourself and pleasing somebody else.
And with my confidence on fire, I set to fixing up my role
My separation of desires just led me deeper down the hole
And when I tried to make it more, it was always less.
And there’s a thin line beween pleasing yourself and pleasing somebody else.
And now I’m trying to get back to what I know that I should be
Hoping on high that I was just a temporary absentee.
And when I tried to make it more, it was always less
And there’s a thin line beween pleasing yourself and pleasing somebody else..
“What...”
“‘Thin Line’ by Gerard McHugh. Indigo Girls sing it a lot. But that’s beside the point. Gadget, I love you. Without you...” she held her fingertips in a cluster, separated them as she blew softly, as if scattering dandelion seeds... “there is no life.” Almost timidly Caprice removed Sarah’s necklace from the folds of Gadget’s jumper and held it to the light. “Like this, see? Rainbows are for people like us, because love comes in all colors. You’re like the pot of gold at the end but... some things are more precious than leprechaun coin. Like you. Gadget, I love you.”
Gadget felt a foolish, euphoric grin spread across her face, saw an answering expression on Caprice’s. “How long did you know?” was all she could formulate.
“Good things come to those who wait. And good things -- and women -- are more than worth waiting for,” she grinned, but not for long. It’s hard to grin while kissing.
* * *
