He took the slip from me and put it on the bed with the other clothes
we were taking to the mortician. His hands lingered on the soft material
for a moment,
then he slammed the drawer shut and turned to me,
"DON'T EVER SAVE ANYTHING
FOR A SPECIAL OCCASION.
EVERY DAY YOU'RE ALIVE IS A SPECIAL OCCASION!"
I remembered those words through the funeral and the days that followed
when I helped him and my niece attend to all the sad chores
that follow an unexpected death. I thought about them on the plane returning
to California from the Midwestern town where my sister's family lives.
I thought about all the things that she hadn't seen or heard or done.
I thought about the things that she had done without realizing that they
were special.
I'm still thinking about his words, and they've changed my life
I'm reading more and dusting less. I'm sitting on the deck and
admiring the view without fussing about the weeds in the garden.
I'm spending more time with my family and friends and less time in
committee meetings. Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of
experience to savor, not endure. I'm trying to recognize these moments
now and cherish them.
I'm not "saving" anything; we use our good china and crystal for
every special event-such as losing a pound, getting the sink
unstopped, the first camellia blossom.
I wear my good blazer to the market if I feel like it. My theory
is if I look prosperous, I can shell out $28.49 for one small
bag of groceries without wincing. I'm not saving my good perfume
for special parties; clerks in hardware stores and tellers in banks have
noses that function as well as my party-going friends".
"Someday" and "one of these days" are losing their grip on my
vocabulary. If it's worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want to see
and hear and do it now. I'm not sure what my sister would have done
had she known that she wouldn't be here for the tomorrow we all take
for granted. I think she would have called family members and a few close
friends. She might have called a few former friends to apologize and
mend fences for past squabbles. I like to think she would have gone out
for a Chinese dinner, her favorite food. I'm guessing-I'll never know.
It's those little things left undone that would make me angry if I
I knew that my hours were limited. Angry because I put off seeing
good friends whom I was going to get in touch with-someday. Angry
because I hadn't written certain letters that I intended to write-one of
these days. And angry and sorry that I didn't tell my husband and daughter
often enough how much I truly love them. I'm trying very hard not
to put off, hold back, or save anything that would add laughter and
luster to our lives.
And every morning when I open my eyes, I tell myself that it is special!
EVERY DAY, EVERY MINUTE, EVERY BREATH TRULY IS...A GIFT FROM GOD!
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