|
..::Funny Quotes::.. |
|
"Awwwwwwww, son of a bitch"
-Jim Ross responding to Vince McMahon being "Greater Power"
"Chyna's not a girl, Chyna's a bitch!"
-Road Dogg
"How come I brought down one bag and you brought down 3?"
-Kevin Nash referring to Macho Man's ladies.
"That is the biggest man that has ever been on top of Patterson" (Viscera)
-Jim Ross
"Vince, you used me!! Tonight, im gonna ABUSE YOU!!!"
-Ken Shamrock
"I no longer need my power tie, because I always have, my power finger. (Gives Vince the finger)"
-Steve Austin
"You know why puppies have wet noses? Because I lick'em!"
-Jerry Lawler
Jerry Lawler: "Our announcing table is wrecked!"
Jim Ross: "And we're not even Spanish!"
Bobby: "She(Aysia) can beat you up you know!"
Tony: "I'm sure she could!"
"You know, the big Valbowski is a lot like concrete mix. You know? You just get it a little wet, take a step back, and watch it get ROCK HARD!"
-Val Venis
"This kid needs an ass wippin!"
-Jim Ross referring to Shane McMahon
"I asked for puppies, not a dog."
-Jerry Lawler reffering to Nicole Bass.
"Union Of People You Outta Respect, wait a minute, we do stand for something, up UP-YORS SHANE!"
-Mankind
"They worked for 2 extrememly crappy wrestling organizations."(ECW, WCW)
-Jerry Lawler reffering to Public Enemy.
Michael Cole:I cant even see the action, a big cowboy hat is in my way.
Jim Ross:There is about to be a big cowboy boot in your ass if you dont shut up.
"What is this? Sing-along with The Champ?!"
-The Rock after the crowd was saying what he was saying the most electrifying line in sprots entertainment today. "If ya smeeeelll, what the Rock is cookin?"
"That's 10 poounds of monkey crap in a 5 pound bag!"
-The Rock reffering to Paul Wight.
"DDP while your in the hospital screaming in pain, your wife will be on her back screaming my name"
-Scott Stiener at Superbrawl IX
"Not much upstairs, but what a staircase!!"
-Jerry Lawler, referring to Debra McMichael
"She's not your type! She's not inflateable."
-Jerry Lawler, reffering to Michael Cole.
"Kicks to the groin, quite frankly, would be greatly appreciated."
-Vince McMahon
Mankind:Hi Debra, I'd got something for your breasts
Debra: Is there something wrong with them?
Mankind: No infact I get a tingly feeling whenever I look at them. But I'm afraid you might catch a chest cold which in your case might be fatal. Here's a sweater.
"Next time say excuse me BITCH!"
-Big Boss Man to Terri Runnels
"Hey Rock! At Summerslam, do you want to know what your role will be? I'm gonna make you my bitch!"
-HHH
"Lets all give a round of applause to the Rock because well....he has my belt. Hell while we're at it, lets all give me a hand cause.....I got his money!
-Mankind on Raw
"After the humiliation you suffered last night, you want some more of me?"
Vince McMahon on Raw after the Royal Rumble 99.
"You know what Austin? I'm gonna get me some!"
-Vince McMahon training for the Royal Rumble.
"You know, this Purple and Red can lead us to bed."
-Mark Henry
"I came, I saw, and I KICKED Stone Cold's ASS!"
-McMahon
"You wouldn't have ever won the match, if Chyna didn't hit the People's Jewels" -The Rock
HHH: Hey, X-Pac, you seen Billy anywhere?
X-Pac: It's not my fucking turn to watch him, biotch!
-From DX uncensored
"Oil of Olay!!"
- Kevin Nash mocking Konnan
"I kicked Kane between the legs, and it felt like I was kicking a pillow!"
-Rock
"A monkey went into the ring, took a crap and out came Mankind!"
-Rock
"DDP, when I look at you, I see white Trash! When I look at the people in the crowd, I see white trash. So maybe you are the people's champion!"
-Scott Stiener
"I got 13 words for the outlaws, how much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
-Mankind at Summer Slam
"If you smellllllalalalala what the sock, is cookin!"!
-Mankind
"Hey your proctologist called, they found your head!"
-Jerry Lawler
"Why don't you take your damn sock, put it on your hand, feel it what's between your legs and see what's there?"
-Rock to Mankind
"Your dad was on the road night after night and your mom was all alone ... and you wonder why you and your brother look nothing alike"
- Chris Jericho to Dean Malenko
"Well Hulk Hogan - you suck pal!"
-X-Pac
"I thought you were dead"
-Hogan to Warrior
"The outcome is always the same, us on top, them on bottom. And no thats not my sexual preference"
-Road Dog
"If I wanted any crap out of you, I would have picked it out of your teeth"
- Shawn Michaels to X-Pac
"Steve Young will play a major role in the superbowl this year. He'll be the one telling his fat wife to fetch him another brewsky"
-Road Dog
"I understand that Marlena likes to talk to Goldust during sex, and last night she called him from a hotel"
-Jerry Lawler
"Shut you mouth, or I will slap the taste out of you"
-The Rock to Micheal Cole
"This leg represents Christmas, this leg represents New Year's. So ladies why dont you come visit me in between the holidays."
-Val Venis
"Looks like Mankind just checked into the Smack Down Hotel on the corner of Know-Your-Role Boulevard and Jabronie Drive."
-Rock
"Make sure you go get those TV guides with Undertaker or Austin on the cover, well of course, those ones may be sold out. Then you may have to settle for the now retired Hulk Hogan, or the Stone Cold wannabee, GOLDBERG!"
-Jim Ross
"Well Rock earlier tonight you took out Hunter Hearst Helmsley's knee out with Intercontinental title what are you thinking about going into tonight's ladder match."
-Michael Cole
"Well Michael the Rock is thinking about slapping the yellow of your teeth"
-the Rock, Summerslam 98
Baddass:The next time I see Shamrock, Im gonna kcik his ASS!
Lawler:Well, you saw him a few minuites ago, and you did nothing!!!
"PIMPS UP....HOES DOWN.....WEST SSSSSYYYYYYYDDDDDDDEEEEEE!!!!!"
-Badd Ass as Gunnfather
Mark Henry's Date:
Mark Henry: WAITRESS!
Waitress: Yes?
Mark Henry: Can we have some water? Not some of that tap water but that really good stuff. Pariair
Chyna: Mark, it's Paryie
Mark Henry: Oh and some of that too
People: ASSHOLE! ASSHOLE! ASSHOLE!
Vince: Austin you are finished!
People: ASSHOLE! ASSHOLE! ASSHOLE!
SCSA: Oh I can't hear ya Vince gotta speak a little louder!
People: ASSHOLE! ASSHOLE! ASSHOLE!
Vince: YOUR ASS IS FIRED!
SCSA: AWW....Vince ya must feel like a real wimp, cause there is about 18,000 people callin you an asshole!
Training for Royal Rumble
Shane: WHO DO YOU WANT DAD?!?!?!?!?!
Vince: AUSTIN!!!!!!!!!!!
Shane: WHO DO YOU HATE?!?!?!?
Vince: AUSTIN!!!!!
Shane: WHO DO YOU WANT?!?!?!?
Vince: Austin
"Where is that damn Scott Hall? We checked all the bars!"
-Kevin Nash
"Maybe he is at the strip club"
-K-Dawg
"Konnan, my friend, he has been kicked out of every strip club in the country "
-Kevin Nash
"Jesse James wrestles as well as he sings Mr. Lawler"
-Vince
"Well, then that leaves nothing but this guy ain't gonna get anywhere"
-Jerry
"You beat nothing, on Saturday... till you went back to your hotel room that night pal."
-Syxx
On DX Super Soakers Commercial:
Director: Come on guys. One more take.....and ACTION!
Badd Ass: Super Soaker SPF 3000, don't leave home without it!
Director: CUT!
Badd Ass: Super Soaker SPF 3000 The Fresh Maker!
Director: CUT! You know, in all oh my years in this business, I have never seen anything like this. You guys are by far the rudest most uncoroperative people I have ever had the displease of working with bow, you will get it right this time or I walk. Do I make my self clear?
DX: THE PRESSURE IS ON!
"If you are dumb enough, to set your @$$ on fire, you can bet your bottom dollar that Stone Cold is gonna bring all the marshmellows, the hotdogs, and all the beer..........."
-Stone cold
"Samoan Savage is so ugly he has to get up early in the morning & ambush breakfast."
-Jim CornetteP> "Rick Steiner is so stupid, he once stayed up all night to study for a urine test."
-Jim Cornette
"Norman is so stupid, mind readers charge him half price."
-Jim Cornette
"Norman is so fat, he has furniture disease - his chest is in his drawers."
-Jim Cornette
"Rick Steiner is so stupid, it takes him 1 1/2 hours to watch `60 Minutes."
-Jim Cornette
"There are bears in the woods that are tamer than Stan Hansen!"
-Bob Caudle
"(Rick) Steiner's eyes are glazed, even more than normal!"
-Jim Ross
"Here Rock, take this coporate table. Here Rock have this coporate....this coporate....what ever the hell this thing is."
-Mankind
"Rock that taste in your mouth is these nuts."
-HHH
"I heard the Godwinns were at the mall and the power went out so they got stuck on the escalator for 2 hours."
-Jerry Lawler
"I heard that Max Minnie tryed to commit suicide by jumping off a curb."
-Jerry Lawler
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Following from DX Uncensored Video:
Hunter hearst helmsly:Ladies and gentlemen between the hours of 10:00 pm to 11:00 pm we will use the words ass, hell and bitch we will never use the words shit, fuck, god damn and fagot or any other racial slurs. now as it pretains to video we wont use dick refrences:
shawn michaels: Shit
hunter hearst helmesly: whatch your fucking mouth
shawn michales: fuck me
hunter hearst helmesly: god! fuck. Anyway we wont use any penis refrences.
shawn micheals: Now as everyone might know the favorite passtime in the oral office is swallow the leader I did not sleep with that young intern in fact I was up all night!!!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"The Big Valbowski is kida like a pool just jump right in and get wet!!"
-Val Venis
"The Big Valbowski is kinda like a cuban cigar the more you suck it, the more you choke!!"
-Val Venis
"If you can't beat it, SUCK IT!!!"
-DX
"If I win little miss deby has to show off her tasty cakes."
-Goldust
"I WANT TO WRESTLE THE OLD REY MYSTERIO, NOT THE ONE IN THE LAZY WRESTLINGORGANAZION."
-KIDMAN
"Wait, wait, wait! The Rock's got 4 donuts for you Jabroni's!"
-The Rock when he got arrested on Raw
"If you smell what the sock is cooking"
-Mankind at Survivor Series 98
"You know I could easily kick your ass, but last time I checked, my name was Steven Regal, not Elton John so I'll take the broads."
-Steven Regal
"I was surprised that you excepted the hoes, cuz I thought all fags were from England!" -Godfather
Godfather and Regal on Nov 16 98's Raw
"OH, tell that ugly one right there!"
-Eric Bishoff
"Well you know that ugly one right there! Do us all a favor! Leave that Sting mssk on brother!"
-Hollywood Hogan
"Dont just blow it show it. "
-Sable
"I guess getting down on your knees runs in the family "
-Val Venis
"The Big Valbowski is alot like a Hakeem Olajuwan, either he's taking the hook shot from the outside or driving down the lane on the inside, he always scores!"
-Val Venis
"Pimpin Ain't Easy!"
-Godfather
"Do unto others what ever you think is funny!"
-Jerry Lawler
"I don't know what your cookin', smells like shit, but I think I'll eat some anyway. HEHEHE!"
-X-Pac
"I love the scent of burnt flesh in the morning!"
-Slaughter (after he burnt Hulk Hogan at WM 7)
"I am not a nugget! I'm a blackheart damn it, a winner, a sole survivor, WOOOO!"
-Jason Sensation
"Sugar coated testies. Is that a new breakfast cereal?"
-MANKIND
"The Crock just went to the bathroom you should of smelt what the Rock was cooking. I aint faking you should of smelt what the Rock was baking!"
-HHH
"You know, the Big Valbowski is kind of like a rubix cube, the more that you play with it the harder it gets."
-VAL VENIS
"I got balls the size of grapefruits!"
-Vince McMahon
"Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls, chidren of all ages. Heavy metal music proudly brings to you. Its WWF, TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS OF THE WORLD!! Mosh and Thrasher, THE HEADBANGERS!!!"
-Mosh
"And if you aren't down with the Headbanngers? We got 2 words for ya! YOU SUCK!!!"
-Thrasher
|
|
Wwf online 2000 the 1# on the net |