Some thoughts on the intelligent discussion and argument
7/5 - There are basically three important rules to good philosophy: selflessness, intelligence, and open-mindedness.
The first one is a common one to break. Sometimes selfishness is not some conscious decision, but rather an inner desire that a person denies having. Many athiests believe as they do because they are selfish. Because of this reason, the word atheism itself has a very bad connotation. My theories may not support the existance of god, but no more do they support self-morals.
Intelligence is the second rule, and it is not only intelligent people who can be philosophical. What I am refering to is the type of inquistiveness that a person holds to find the truth. Intelligence also means utilizing the other two rules.
The third rule is open-mindedness. This is a vague rule because there are so many shades of it. Many people believe they are open-minded in the fact that they allow for everyone to have their own opinion, but are closed in the fact that they will not allow themselves to be altered. In this sense, there are bound to be a lot of people with self-morals that no one tries to change. I think it is great that we as a race are becoming more open, but it is not that kind that I wish for and that I think we need. I think people need to come together with their ideas.
Another idea that is less of "rule" and more of a necessity is idealism. People keep telling me "That's just the way society is." But, sometimes we need to sit back and suggest that maybe society shouldn't be that way and doesn't have to be that way. If we shoot for what we know can handle, we are bound to get lower than that and even the very best we can get is what we shoot for. If we shoot as high as possible, then obviously we can't reach it because that would be a perfect society, but we may be able to change something. Basically, we need to realize that the world needs to be changed and can be changed if we work together.
As a whole we need to support each other, and learn from each other. We are becoming too independant, in thought and action. I have many theories of unity, but they are too broad for this topic. In the future look for these theories under evolution and my letter to Christians.
6/10 - Argument is an important part of living. Sometimes it is constructive, and sometimes it is destructive. It is important to have good argument skills in order to be intelligent and to have good relationships.
I think it is ignorant to base huge ideas upon interpretation. Theories are meant to be questioned, not accepted. Producing opposing theories will lead to the truth just as supporting other ones will. People need to be open minded and logical. Be careful when making decisions not to fool yourself into thinking you are being logical when in reality you are being selfish. Search your soul. Know your truth.
As far as relationships go, people tend to be terrible at arguments, and sometimes the arguments lead to shouting matches, violence, or even divorce.
First of all, personal attacks are totally destructive to an argument. It makes a person defensive and will likely attack. The person who starts the personal attacks may not realize they are doing it, but then the argument escalates into hard feelings. Be careful about that.
Secondly, don't use another persons flaws as an excuse for your own. And don't be afraid to help each other realize your faults (constructively that is) and help each other overcome them. I think society is set up to hide faults and wrong-doings by lieing to ourselves and being (What's the word I'm looking for? I mean when people lie to someone else because the truth is rude or unnacceptable). The first step to recovery is realizing you have a problem.
Thirdly, hear the other person's side out. Don't interrupt them even if you have a valid point that you are dieing to get out. Also, on the other end, don't talk forever without letting the other person speak their peace. Likely, the other person is building up ideas and counterpoints that need to be released. Without these things things could go sour and people could get frustrated and basically there will be no agreement or anything point in the argument at all. In addition, I think an argument can become extremely productive if both people extremely embrace the other's ideas and instead of justing listening to what they say, UNDERSTAND what they say.
Fourth, don't bicker about the exact words used when a person is talking. Many times when I'm talking about philosophy I forget how to speak correctly because I'm focusing so much on theory. Then, I end up using the wrong word and then the person I'm talking to uses that against me in their argument. Try to understant the main idea of what the person is saying, not the exact definition of each sentence they use.
Finally, if you are not in the right frame of mind to be arguing, don't. I have found this out the hard way as I'm sure many people have. People end up taking out their days agitations on their spouse or releasing their built-up anger on a loved one. Take a time out. Talk about it later. Write a note to the person instead of confronting them face to face.