Everybody has their absolute favorites, and I'm no exception. The list continues to grow as the years go by, but there are some that are just eternal in my mind. I hold these films in the utmost regard, as most of them had everything to do with why I started watching B-movies in the first place. Others have come along and made indellible impressions on me since that time, and I will try to list them in the future. For now, here'a list (in no particular order) of my all-time favorite B-movies. Keep in mind, this is just one guy's opinion (who is under 30), and as Picasso once said: "The chief enemy of creativity is good taste". Email me if you dig these too!
EVIL DEAD 2: DEAD BY DAWN
PLOT-While vacationing in a remote cabin, A man and his girlfriend fall victim to demonic spirits.
WHY IT'S A CLASSIC-First things first: I consider this to be the best movie I have ever seen. Sure, it's been viewed by millions (and most everyone likes it), but I think it's the best film ever made. Despite the simple plot and setting, the film is a non-stop riot, filled with amazing cinematography and special effects. Even with all that, the film owes most of its appeal to the performance of actor Bruce Campbell in the role of "Ash". His comic ability, leading man presence, and incredible physical feats in this movie are worth a thousand Oscars. No other actor could ever (or will ever) come close to duplicating any aspect of Campbell's performance. He created a cult hero, and helped make director Sam Raimi one of the most revered in horror history.
MEMORABLE SCENES-In what has since become a legendary sequence, Ash's right hand becomes posessed by the demon spirit, causing him to beat himself up in the kitchen. He throws himself about mercilessly, punching himself and repeatedly breaking plates and glasses over his head (let's see Tom Hanks do that)! Instead of dying, our hero chops off the bad appendage and keeps on truckin'.
BLOOD FEAST
PLOT-An upper-class family hires Egyptian caterer Fuad Ramses to provide food for a party, unaware of the "secret ingredients" he uses in his food.
WHY IT'S A CLASSIC-Famous as one of the first gore films ever made, BLOOD FEAST also happens to be extremely entertaining. It's got all the things a bad movie is supposed to have: blondes, cheesy music, horrible acting, and tons of blood. It never gets old because it's so much fun to watch. The dialogue is hilarious, and the effects are cheap but still disgusting. Tongues, hearts and guts are ripped from the bodies of young girls, and brains pour out of another's head...all shown in ultra-saturated color! H.G. Lewis directed a few other similar films before retiring (2000 MANIACS, COLOR ME BLOOD RED, THE GORE-GORE GIRLS, SHE DEVILS ON WHEELS, GRUESOME TWOSOME, THE WIZARD OF GORE), and all had their moments. However, none of them clicked the way this one did. It has everything a B-movie fan could want, even nudity.
MEMORABLE SCENES- After the murders get under way, one of the several inept cops is seen reading a newspaper. The headline reads in huge print: "LEGS CUT OFF!"
RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD
PLOT-Toxic chemicals are accidentally released in a small town, causing the dead to rise from the grave in search of fresh human brains.
WHY IT'S A CLASSIC-One could write a book on how great this movie is, and I could never do it justice. Although inflenced by NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD, it takes the concept in a truly modern and inventive direction, and is far better than any of George Romero's sequels to that 1968 classic. From the moment the deadly chemical is released, the viewer is taken on an unrelenting journey of horror and humor that few movies can touch. In many ways it's the PULP FICTION of zombie movies, filled with sharp dialogue, interesting characters, clever editing and great music. It manages to be truly scary as well as funny, a thing that several films have attempted but few have successfully achieved. You actually care about the people in danger, mostly due to all the memorable performances, and there are no stars or heroes. It's definitely one of a kind.
MEMORABLE SCENES- There are many, but the most infamous is Linnea Quigley's tombstone dance sequence. As punk rocker Trash, she begins with the immortal line: "Do you ever fantasize about being killed, like what would be the most horrible way to die?", and does a striptease on top of someone's tomb in front of all her friends.
AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON
PLOT-A man who survives a werewolf attack while in London soon finds himself in a hairy situation (I couldn't help it).
WHY IT'S A CLASSIC-This movie is pure joy: chock-full of scares, amazing special effects, and an assload of funny scenes. If not for the humor (and use of classic rock tunes like "Blue Moon", "Moondance" and "Bad Moon Rising"), this would have been an extremely hard-hitting and terrifying cinematic experience. Rick Baker's Oscar-winning werewolf transformation scene has yet to be topped, even in the age of computer effects. If you've never seen it, you're really missing out. Director John Landis takes the age-old werewolf premise and turns it into one of the most memorable films in history with this winning combination. I have probably seen it well over a hundred times, and it never gets old. Truly an underrated movie, I think ultimately it will be appreciated as more and more people discover it in the future.
MEMORABLE SCENES-In one of many clever and original moments, the character of David has a nightmare while in the hospital recovering from the wolf attack. He wakes up, only to experience another horrific nightmare when we think all is fine. He wakes up yet again, yelling "SHIT!"
CANNIBAL! THE MUSICAL
PLOT-Based on the true story of Alfred Packer, a group of men looking for gold lose their way and resort to cannibalism to survive.
WHY IT'S A CLASSIC-Before Trey Parker & Matt Stone became household names as creators of SOUTH PARK, they were struggling filmmakers who happened to turn out a cult masterpiece with this, their first film. Not only is it a factual account of real events (at times taken verbatim from the written confession of Packer), but it really is a damn good musical with great songs. It also has a lot of gore, as several characters are killed and eaten throughout the film. As could be expected, this is a comedy, and it's funny as shit. Put all those elements together, and you've got a b-movie classic. Although Parker & Stone went on to bigger things with exceptional results, this film stands as a monumental achievement in the realm of independent low-budgeters. It's peerless.
MEMORABLE SCENES-In the doomed group's darkest hour (right before the cannibalism begins), one of them bursts into song and implores the group to "build a snowman". He sings and dances, as his bewildered and agitated companions grow more and more angry. In the middle of his song, he's shot in the head by one of the group. They eat him shortly after.
DEAD ALIVE (aka BRAIN DEAD)
PLOT-A scrawny mama's boy is forced to battle the living dead as everyone around him falls victim to a rabies-like disease that quickly turns the infected into monsters.
WHY IT'S A CLASSIC-This movie almost defies description as the viewer is taken on a cartoon-like rollercoaster ride, filled with one disgusting gag after another. It makes an impression on everyone who sees it, and is highly revered among horror fans as one of the goriest films ever made. I'd have to agree: pound for pound, it has more intestines, brains, blood, eyeballs, severed heads, and exploding zombies than anything I've seen. Luckily, its tone is highly comic and thus makes the violent content easier to stomach. New Zealand director Peter Jackson had previously entered gross-out territory with BAD TASTE and MEET THE FEEBLES, but a higher budget and better production value allowed him to pull out all the stops for this one. I still have yet to see another film in which a digestive system goes on a murderous rampage.
MEMORABLE SCENES-Lionel, the main character, attempts to keep the zombie plague under wraps by containing them in the basement of his house. At one point, he gets them all together at the table and tries to feed them dinner. When one cannot eat due to a severed neck, Lionel pulls back the head and dollops the food right into the esophagus.
PINK FLAMINGOS
PLOT-A trailer-trash war breaks out when a family of weirdos' title of "Filthiest People Alive" is challenged by a couple amateur deviants.
WHY IT'S A CLASSIC-A film like this could never have been made with a high budget or any other actors. Director John Waters and his untouchable cast made this one of the most original movies in history, with a style and feel unlike anything else. The thing I like best about this film (and all Waters' early ones) is the willingness of the cast to do absolutely anything. The actors have no inhibitions or fears whatsoever, and once you realize that, you're ready for anything to happen. A sex scene where a live chicken is torn apart? Fine. Give a transvestite a blowjob? Piece of cake. Eat real dog shit? No problem. I also enjoy the priceless dialogue, and the subsequent delivery of the lines. Given the fact that it's ultra low-budget, the performances are unbelievably wonderful. John Waters is one of the best directors ever, and I wish Divine and the gang were still alive.
MEMORABLE SCENES-In one of the first assaults in this "war of filth", Divine receives a gift-wrapped package in the mail containing a real human turd (which, in real life, she made and wrapped herself). Upon opening it, she cries out, "Someone has sent me a bowel movement!"
RE-ANIMATOR
PLOT-Two medical students develop a serum that gives life to dead bodies & parts.
WHY IT'S A CLASSIC-When I'm feeling down about the state of modern horror films, or even after I've just seen a crappy one, I can always play this movie to make myself feel better. They don't get much better than this, and I mean that. In the opening scene, before the credits roll, you know what kind of film it's going to be. A guy screams and his eyeballs blow out! Jeffrey Combs is one of the best actors around, and manages to come across strongly in a matter of seconds as the character of Herbert West. As with my other favorite films, this one is also armed with an insane sense of humor. It takes no pity on the audience, and does whatever the hell it wants, often with shocking results. RE-ANIMATOR is a reminder of a long-gone era of horror filmmaking, that "anything goes" style unconcerned with making an artistic statement. It goes directly for the thrills and delivers on all levels: gore, nudity, and scares.
MEMORABLE SCENES-The sinister Dr. Hill, having been re-animated after getting his head chopped off with a shovel, still manages to get around as just a head with the help of his body. However, the headless body is a bumbling idiot, much to the dismay of Hill. He orders his own body around like it was a henchman, and is constantly yelling at it when it stumbles into things and makes mistakes.
THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW
PLOT-On a dark and stormy night, a soon-to-be-married couple find themselves trapped in the mansion of the diabolical Dr. Frank N. Furter, a transvestite from outer space.
WHY IT'S A CLASSIC-As if that requires any explanation after reading the plot! Seriously, this is the granddaddy of b-movies, and is much deserving of its huge cult following. Most everybody has either seen it or at least heard of it by now. As a teen, it was a rite of passage for me: I went to midnight showings of it every weekend for over a year, and became a member of a live performing cast as "Riff Raff" the butler. If you just put in the video at home, the movie will seem pretty stupid and boring. However, after seeing it with a crowd of hard-core fans, it becomes one of the coolest (and funniest) things you've ever seen. It's a musical, too, filled with awesome rock tunes that you'll be hooked on forever. ROCKY HORROR has come to symbolize individuality and self-expression, and for me, provided a wonderful outlet in which I was able to let loose a side of me I never knew existed.
MEMORABLE SCENES-Since I've seen it well over a hundered times, I've come to appreciate some of the more subtle things that one doesn't notice right away. My favorite part is right before Frank turns Columbia into a statue, when she's yelling at him about how his creation Rocky is "so named 'cause of the rocks in his head". Columbia pulls at her pajama shirt, briefly revealing one of her nipples. I don't know why, but it's interesting.
NIGHT OF THE DEMONS
PLOT-A group of horny teenagers decide to have a party in an old spooky house. Guess what? It's got demons in it!
WHY IT'S A CLASSIC-This is a great example of a movie that's dumb on the outside and kick-ass on the inside. I've grown quite fond of this little bastard over the years. Sure, it exists only as a means to systematically murder some idiotic kids, but it does so with such style. For one thing, we're not dealing with a psycho killer here. Lurking inside the house are honest-to-god evil demons. Like the first EVIL DEAD movie, it starts by one of them getting posessed and passing it on until there's only a couple left. What keeps me watching this movie again and again are the actors. They're all fantastic at playing their individual stereotypes: you've got the scary girl, the slut, the virgin, the giggly chick, the jock, the smart guy, the asshole, the punk rocker, and the skittish overly-religious black guy. Forget the idea that these people would never hang out together in real life, they're fun to watch as the demons tighten their grip on these unfortunate souls. They screw each other, get dispatched in all manner of gory ways, and come back from the dead to stalk whomever is still left alive. The shining star out of them all, of course, is Linnea Quigley. Although she plays the youngest character (but is probably the oldest in the cast), she steals every scene and gets some of the best dialogue. Plus, who could forget her infamous "lipstick" scene? Not me.
MEMORABLE SCENES-Among the infinite amount of priceless dialogue, there's one bit that will always stand out. My friends, you all know what that is. Spoken by Stooge, the punker: "Eat a bowl of FUCK! I am here to party!"
THE SADIST
PLOT-Three teachers get stranded at an old gas station, only to fall prey to an insane juvenile delinquent.
WHY IT'S A CLASSIC-There isn't anything necessarily "good" about this movie, and that's probably why I love it so much. The story is dumb, the acting is crappy, and there's not even any monsters. However, the film has one thing going for it that makes it all worthwhile: the performance of Arch Hall Jr. as the "Sadist", a wild-eyed delinquent teen who's on the run from the cops with his white-trash girlfriend Judy. He laughs like a hyena, gets angry, waves his gun around, and drinks soda. Those who have seen it know what I'm talking about. It's hilarious to watch him go. The entire movie takes place in this old junkyard/service station, and it's basically just these poor teachers getting tortured by Arch. They try to figure him out, try to escape, but he's just too damn evil and crazy. The movie will take you by surprise, though, as the violence escalates to more murder & mayhem than you'd expect to see in such a cheesy flick. It's one I love to make my friends watch, because we can make fun of it endlessly. I don't know if Arch intended his portrayal of THE SADIST to be so over-the-top or not, but I'd like to hope so.
MEMORABLE SCENES-For some reason, it was considered sinister to shake up a bottle of soda before drinking it. Perhaps I'm just too young to understand. Anyway, several times in the movie, the teenage delinquents do that. They try to make it look so scary, like they were drinking something they knew was poisoned. Either way, it's funny as hell.
FREAKED (aka HIDEOUS MUTANT FREEKZ)
PLOT-Actor Ricky Coogin and friends visit FREEK LAND, an amusement park wherein the patrons get turned into mutants.
WHY IT'S A CLASSIC-I must've re-written this part five or six times, and still didn't come up with anything that does this film justice. Let's put it this way: anyone who's seen this knows it's awesome, but it's hard to explain its appeal to somebody who hasn't. The comedy is higly original and very cartoonish, as we're dealing with monsters and all kinds of other stuff. The special effects, which range from giant monster suits to stop-motion animation, are very well done and fun to watch. It has some big stars, including Keanu Reeves, Mr. T, Brooke Shields, Randy Quaid, and Bobcat Goldthwait. However, it is the sole creation of Alex Winter and Tom Stern, who were responsible for the short-lived but brilliant show IDIOT BOX on MTV a few years back. It's non-stop craziness the whole time. God damn, I suck at writing! It's just one of my favorites, okay? Go watch it. I'm done!
MEMORABLE SCENES-After being mutated into the "Beast Boy", Ricky puts on a show in which he reads Shakespeare to the audience. When his talent agent arrives to take him home, he yells "EAT SHIT!" and tears off the agent's head.
