SPACE GHOST COAST TO COAST: CHAOS AGAIN
(Space Ghost, Zorak, and Moltar are sitting around a table)
ZORAK: (sips drink) This coffee tastes like dirt!
MOLTAR: Brak made it - it probably is.
SPACE GHOST: (sips coffee) I think it tastes fine (cheesy grin)
(Space Ghost's teeth are blackened with mud, and he has a worm sticking out of them)
ZORAK: O.O
MOLTAR: OK, dude, no, that's just sick
(Zorak and Moltar leave)
SPACE GHOST: What?
(Opening plays)
(Space Ghost appears)
SPACE: GHOST: Greetings, citizens! I'm Space Ghost! And this is my band, Zorak and the Original Way-Outs! Zorak, play me to my desk.
(Zorak sighs and starts to play that funeral song. Space Ghost appears behind desk)
SPACE GHOST: Tonight we have... Oh, hey, Moltar, I've been meaning to ask you something.
MOLTAR: (annoyed) What?
SPACE GHOST: Whatever happened with to you and that TOM fellow?
MOLTAR: (coldly) We got stuck mopping the floors together...
ZORAK: Didn't that happen with you and Andy Dick?
MOLTAR: Er, yeah
SPACE GHOST: And didn't you two end up being friends afterwards?
MOLTAR: Yeah, well, Andy Dick didn't steal my job. Oh, hey, speaking of that, TIM-
SPACE GHOST: TOM!
MOLTAR: Whatever. TOM happened to say something that I found very interesting.
SPACE GHOST: Oh? What was that?
MOLTAR: (mad) That is was YOU that told him that the Toonami job was interfering with my work on THIS show, and that's why I had to QUIT the hosting job!!!
SPACE GHOST: Er, y-yeah...
MOLTAR: (madder) So YOU’RE the reason why I don't have that ship, and why I'm still stuck on this goodness forsaken dust ball of a planet!
(Moltar is suddenly surrounded by flames, DBZ style)
SPACE GHOST: O.O Eek!
ZORAK: Whoa, dude! He's gonna get Super Sayian on yer backside!
(Moltar blasts through the wall of the control booth, making a pathway to the stage)
MOLTAR: BURN!! (Blast a fireball at Space Ghost)
SPACE GHOST: (little girl scream) (flies away)
MOLTAR: GET BACK HERE, SPACE TOAST!! (runs after him)
CRYTSAL: Man, that didn't take as long as I hoped it would.
ZORAK: How long were ya hopin'?
CRYSTAL: Well, I wanted him to at least get to introduce the guests.
ZORAK: Yeah… Hey, now that SG is as good as toast, can I host?
CRYSTAL: Er, yeah, sure, I guess I can get someone to take Moltar and your place.
ZORAK: Sweet! (Jumps behind desk) Mahahahahahahahaha...
*****
(Scene opens with Zorak sitting behind the desk, talking to the new band leader, FC Bandicoot)
FC: Ye', so 'ow the bloomin’ ‘eck did I end up 'ere?
ZORAK: Don't ask me, Crystal's the one writing this.
CRYSTAL: You were the only guy I could think of that play keyboard.
FC: I play guitar.
CRYSTAL: Well, now you play keyboard, too.
ZORAK: Who's ya get to produce the show?
CRYSTAL: No one, I'm the one writing this, and I say what happens, so we don't really need one.
ZORAK: Hm, good point, just don't tell Moltar that when he gets back
CRYSTAL: Don't worry, just start the show!
ZORAK: Right (turns to camera) Hello, Kiddies, I'm Zorak, new host of this worthless show. For our first guest tonight, we have Spyro the Dragon. Fire breathing dragon? Man, too bad Moltar's not here, he would've loved to meet this guy!
FC: I have. 'E's not much to talk to.
ZORAK: Hm, well, send him in... er... Crystal.
(A screen with Spyro on it comes down)
ZORAK: Oo Purple, fire breathing dragon?
FC: That sounds like something you'd see when you're 'igh. Like pink elephants when you're drunk.
SPYRO: Hey!
FC: I'm just tellin' ya what I think.
CRYSTAL: Boys, please, just get on with it.
ZORAK: Right, so, Dragon, how many knights have you killed?
SPYRO: What? Oh, I'm not that kind of dragon...
ZORAK: What? You don't kill anything?
SPYRO: Well, I kill baddies...
ZORAK: WHAT?! Screw you, lizard boy! (Zaps him) Right, next guest!
CRYSTAL: Man, that interview was supposed to last the whole part....
ZORAK: Oh well, next guest!
(The screen once again comes down, this time with Sparx on it)
FC: Oo A bug?
ZORAK: (glares) And what's wrong with bugs?
FC: OO Um, nothin'
ZORAK: That's what I thought. Now, Sparx, how ya doin'?
SPARX: Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!
ZORAK: HA! Really?
SPARX: Buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!
ZORAK: Dude! That sucks!
(Zorak and Sparx continue talking, while FC leans over to Crystal)
FC: Can you understand 'im?
CRYSTAL: (Sigh) No... Why did they book a bug that can't even talk?
FC: Them? You're the one writing this.
CRYSTAL: Well, I thought he could talk!
(Back to Zorak and Sparx)
ZORAK: HA! Man, that's too bad... What? Oh, that's all the time we have tonight, see ya next week kiddies! MAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! (Goes back to talking to Sparx)
*****
(Zorak, Crystal, and FC are now sitting around a table. Zorak and FC are drinking coffee, Crystal has her head on the table in disgust)
ZORAK: It wasn't THAT bad, Chrissy, that last Sparx guy was a good guest.
FC: For you maybe, but that rest of us couldn't understand 'im!
ZORAK: That's your problem.
CRYSTAL: (moan) Where are Space Ghost and Moltar...?
(Scene cuts to Space Ghost and Moltar fighting Rock 'Em, Sock 'Em Robot style on some planet)
(Goes back to the three)
FC: At least not TOO much was destroyed this time.
ZORAK: Yeah, everything blew up last time, we all got stuck fixing it, too.
FC: Yeah, and at least Brak wasn't in it this time.
(Just then, Brak runs by, once again, with no pants on)
BRAK: WOOOOOOO...!!!
ZORAK: Damn it! Who gave Brak caffinated!? (Goes off to find out who it was)
CRYSTAL: (sigh) Only one thing could make this worse.
FC: What's that?
(Suddenly, Lord Kagato runs by, closely followed by Lozzy)
LOZZY: Come back here, my love!
KAGATO: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!
CRYSTAL: That!
FC: (nods) Yup, that'll do it
CRYSTAL: (sigh) I better end this story while I still can.
-Fin-
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