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CRASH BANDICOOT: THE OLD SWITCH-A-ROO

(A gun fires in the distance. It gets closer.)

BAM!

CRASH: Whoa!

(It nearly missed him.)

NEO: AAAAAHHHHHGGGGG!! BLAST YOU, CRASH BANDICOOT!

(Crash looked to his left. He saw his sister, Coco, up against Tiny Tiger, who is anything but tiny. He knew she was in for trouble.)

COCO: Can’t we all get along?

(He swipes at her)

COCO: Guess not.

(Neo shot at Crash again. Unfortunately, Crash was off grad.)

CRASH: AAAAHHHH!!!
COCO: Crash! (runs to him.) Crash, are you all right?
CRASH: ...nnnnnnn...

(Coco got up. She stormed over to Neo...)

NEO: Uh, oh...

(...Slapped him...)

SMACK!

NEO: AH!

(...And went back to her brother)

DINGO: (holding in a laugh) ...ehehehe ...AHAHAHAHA!!!
NEO: (holding cheek) Oh, shut up...
DINGO: Sorry mate...AHAHAHA!!!
CRASH: (groan)

(Then, everyone but Neo stopped)

NEO: What’s wrong?
DINGO: Ya’ know ‘ow animals have a sixth sense when something bad is going to happen?
NEO: Yeah...?
DINGO: Well...

(The ground starts to shake)

COCO: Earthquake!

(A warp portal opened and they fall in)
*******************************************
AKU AKU: Crash, Crash can you hear me?

(It seemed Aku Aku had been caught in the quake, too.)

AKU AKU: Crash?
CRASH: ...

(Crash shook his head. Man, was his head killing him! He got up. He forgot about the pain in his head and remembered the pain in his shoulder.)

CRASH: AAAAHHH!!
AKU AKU: I guess that's a 'yes'
DINGO: Ouch...

(Dingo also got up.)

DINGO: Where are we?
CRASH: (thinking) Some place cold...(starts to shiver)
TINY: Ooooo... Tiny head hurt... Whoa, where'd that come from?
EVERYONE: O.o(?)
TINY: What?
AKU AKU: I didn't know Tiny could talk that well.
TINY: T-Tiny?!
AKU AKU: Ahuh
TINY: B-but I'm Pura!
EVERYONE: WHAT?!
CRASH: ^O.O^(?)
TINY: I mean, I FEEL like Tiny...
AKU AKU: You're right, I feel like Aku Aku.
DINGO: You ARE, mate!
AKU AKU: WHAT?!

MEANWHILE

NEO: Help, I've fallen and can't get up...
COCO: That's because the bear and tiger are on you, idiot...
NEO: Hmm? (looks up) Hey! Get off! (Polar and Pura do) (to Coco) And as for you, don't ever talk to me like that, girl!
COCO: Who you callin' 'girl'?
NEO: (sigh) You really are an idiot, aren't you, Coco?
COCO: I'M YOUR BOSS!!
NEO: Say what?
MEGUMI: OK, I'm hearin' things...
NEO & COCO: (?)
MEGUMI: I thought you said that you were Uka Uka.
NEO: She did.
COCO: I did.
MEGUMI: That means I'm not hearing things and that means I do sound like myself.
NEO: You mean you're not?
MEGUMI: No, I'm Ami.
NEO & COCO: (!)
NEO: WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?!
******************************************
DINGO: OK, first things first.
"PURA": That would be...?
DINGO: To find your bodies
"PURA": And how are we going to do that?
DINGO: Well, they shouldn't be too far....
"PURA": Oh, great....
DINGO: Shut up, cat, or you're toast!
"PURA": Oh yeah?
DINGO: Yeah!
"COCO" That's enough!
BOTH: Sorry...
"COCO" That's better. Now, as Dingo said, they shouldn't be too far...
DINGO: Ummmm...one more thing.
"COCO": What's that?
DINGO: We also need to find out why Crash and I haven't changed. I mean, you ARE Crash, right?

(Crash nods)

VOICE: Don't forget Cortex.

(The four turn to see Crash's girlfriend Tawna, her sister Liz, Ami, Lita, Polar, Pura, Coco, and Neo.)

NEO: Hi...
"PURA": OK, who's who?
TAWNA: I'm Liz.
LIZ: Tawna.
AMI: Megumi.
MEGUMI: Ami.
"PURA" (pointing to Pura) I'm guessing he's Tiny

(He nods)

DINGO: Who's Polar?
POLAR: Ruff!
"COCO": Looks like he's the same, too

(Polar nods)

"TAWNA": Then who and where's Aku Aku?
NEO: Who knows and who cares?
VOICE: I'm right here

(Crash looked around. He saw a crate with a picture of Aku Aku on it. He went up, spun it, and out came Uka Uka.)

CRASH: AH!
UKA UKA: It's just me, child!

(Crash looked very confused. So did Neo. He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out.)

NEO: EAP!
"UKA UKA": What's wrong?

(Neo mouthes something that looks like 'My voice!')

"MEGUMI": This is insane!!

(Later, the team is thinking of ways to get back.)

"AMI": We can ask N. Gin for help…
"COCO": Yeah, that might work...
VOICE: Let me get this straight...

(A voice came out of nowhere. It had a heavy Australian accent. At first everyone thought it was Dingo, but it went on)

VOICE: Coco is Aku Aku, Aku Aku is Uka Uka, and Uka Uka is Coco. Tiny is Pura and Pura is Tiny. Tawna and Liz have switched. So have Ami and Megumi. Dingo and Polar have stayed exactly the same and the Doc has lost his voice and I've somehow found it. Is that right?
ALL: CRASH?!
CRASH: (the accent it gone now) What?
"COCO": You can talk?!
CRASH: Aaaaa... yeah, I just said that. (no pun intended)
"TAWNA": But, how?
CRASH: I just said I didn't know! What are you starring at?
"UKA UKA": You and that giant plant behind you.
CRASH: AH! (jumps behind Dingo)
DINGO: (?) CRASH: I don't like giant plants.

(Then they realized that there were giant plants. Sooner enough, they bolted.)
*****************************************
(One of the plants was chasing the two masks. Another Coco and Pura. One Tawna, Liz, Ami, and Megumi. One Dingo and Polar and the last one, Crash and Neo.)

CRASH: Wait, this is a MAN eating plaint, right?

(Neo nods. Crash stops running)

CRASH: Then I don't need to worry.

(He was right - the plant zoomed past him and kept running after Neo)

NEO: (thinking) Why that little....
"COCO": Crash!
CRASH: What?
"COCO": That wasn't very nice.
CRASH: Fine, I'll go save 'im then.
"COCO": Now I never said that
"AKU AKU": Crash, Coco...
CRASH: OK, OK...

(Crash runs up to the plant and spins it.)

CRASH: There! Happy?
"AKU AKU": Very

(As it would seem, everyone else had beaten their plants, too.)

CRASH: Well, that was fun, but next time, let's save ourselves the trouble and roll around in gravel.
"COCO": We've got to fine a way back…
"PURA": Let's go down to Cortex's lab and see if N. Gin can help us.
"TAWNA": Good idea.

(So they headed off to Cortex Castle)
***************************************
(When they got to the castle, they saw N. Gin working on an experiment of some sort.)

CRASH: Hi!
NATE: (jumping) What the...?
"COCO": Long story. We need your help

A MINUTE OR SO LATER

"COCO": ...And here we are.
NATE: I see. Well, what am I supposed to do?
CRASH: Make a position or something.
NATE: It's not that simple.
"COCO": Well, whatever, just hurry!

(With that, Nate and Neo set off to work leaving the others to sit and hope they would find a way to get back. The rest of the Crash Team sat waiting for them to finish the antidote for whatever had happened to them. Crash, however, was not in a rush to get back. It would mean that he wouldn't be able to talk anymore. As Crash sat thinking about this, elsewhere the plants were reporting back to their master.)

MAN: What happened to you?

(The plaints re-enacted the scene with the Team. Their master had a sore look on his face.)

MAN: Blasted bandicoot...

(He grabbed his sword and took some swings at the air.)

MAN: I'll get him, and I have a feeling it'll be soon....

(After several hours, Nate and Neo came out.)

"PURA": Did ya' get the antidote?
NATE: More than that. We found out exactly what happened to you.
"AMI": Well...?
NICK: What you fell into was a 'Warp World'. These Warp Worlds open when there's an earthquake. In them, anything can happen, even switching bodies.
"UKA UKA": This is very intersting and all, but how do we get back?

NICK: By drinking this. (holds up a beaker with a blue liquid in it) But you have to go back to the site where the Warp World originally opened.

(Half of the team already bolted out of the door.)
**********************************************
(After some time at getting sorted, each of the switched team members drank some of the blue liquid, shivered at the awful taste, and waited for something to happen.)

"TAWNA": Nothing happened!
NICK: Wait for it...

(A second later, there was a great flash of light. When it died down, everyone looked around, then let out a cheer for they were back to normal.)

CRASH: (thinking) I wonder... (out loud) Hey, Doc, you got your voice?
NEO: (hoarsely) Sorta...

(Everyone was happy at being back in their bodies and were heading back home, except for Crash, Coco, Neo, and Aku Aku.)

COCO: So, Crash, now has a voice and Neo has one too?
CRASH: Yeah, so now I can smack him AND yell at him! (hits Neo)
NEO: Ah!
AKU AKU: Aaaaaa...guys, turn around...
CRASH: (singing)...Bright eyes...
COCO: No, really, turn around!

SHUN!

(Too late. Crash and Neo had been run through by the giant plaint that had been standing behind them)

CRASH: Ya' know, that kinda stings (passes out)
COCO: CRASH!

(She ran to him as he and Neo fell to the floor)

To be continued in 'Crash Bandicoot: Seeing Double'

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