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CRASH BANDICOOT: THE OLD SWITCH-A-ROO (MST version)

(Brige of the SOL. We see Mike and the 'bots playing CTR)

TOM: You're goin' down! (blows Crow up)
CROW: Why you little...
MIKE: Hey, Servo, kiss my acid! (blows Tom up with a bottle)
TOM: AAAAAHHH!!!
MIKE: (still playing) Oh, hi, folk. Welcome to the Satellite of Love. We're just having some fun with this new game we got.

(Yellow light flashes)

MIKE: Looks like Dr. F is calling us. (presses button)
PEARL: Hello, Mike!
MIKE: Hi, there, Dr. F. How are you going to torture us today?
PEARL: Well, I ran out of movies...
SOL CREW: YEAH!!!
PEARL: So I'm going to send you a fanfic instead.
TOM: Fan what?
PEARL: It's a story written by someone who has too much time on their hands and decided to write about a favourite show, movie, game, comic, and stuff like that. I'll be sending it soon.

(red light flashes)

MIKE: Uh oh...
CROW: What?
TOM: Our game!
MIKE: We can finish it later!

(They go into the theatre. In, they take their sits and are ready to began)

CRASH BANDICOOT: The Old Switch-A-Roo

>Crow: Bandiwhat?

Writen by

>Tom: Marilyn Manson!

Crystal Bandicoot

>Tom: Close enough
>Crow: There's that word again...

(Gun fires in the distence. It gets closer.)

>Mike: Duck and cover! (they duck)
CRASH: Whoa!
>Tom: He's fuzzy
NEO: AAAAHHHH!!! Blast you, Crash Bandicoot!
>Crow: WHAT THE HELL IS A BANDICOOT?!

(Crash looked to his left)

>Mike: (singing) It's just a jump to the left...

(He saw his sister, Coco, was up against Tiny Tiger, who was anything but tiny)

>Tom: Then why is he named 'Tiny'?
>Crow: I think they were trying to be funny
COCO: Can't we all get along?
>Mike: Oh, that's originally…

(Tiny swipes at her)

>Tom: You know what rhymes with 'swipes'?
>Crow: Asswipes!
>Mike: Oh, beautiful! (claps) You should be a poet!
COCO: Guess not…

(Neo fires again)

>Crow: And it back fires in his face and he dies, the end.

(This time, he caught Crash off guard)

CRASH: AAAAHHH!!
>All: (singing) ...and we all fall down.
COCO: Crash! (runs to him)
>Tom: Exactly what kind of a name is 'Crash'?
>Mike: I think it's a verb.
>Tom: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh...
COCO: Crash?
CRASH:....aaaaaaagggggg....

(Coco got up, headed for Neo...)

>Crow: And punches him!

NEO: Uh, oh...

(...smacks him...)

>Crow: Oh! Am I good or what?!

(...and goes back to her brother)

NEO: Owwww...
DINGO: (holding in a laugh) hehehehe...AHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
>Mike: Whoa! Where'd that guy come from?!
>Tom: The voices in your head.
NEO: (holding face) Shut up...
DINGO: Heh...sorry, mate, I couldn't help myself...
>Crow: (Dingo) And the line at the bathroom was too long!
CRASH: (groan)

(Just then, everyone but Neo stopped)

>All: Bum bum bummmmmmmmmmm!

NEO: What's wrong?
DINGO: Well, you know how animals have a sixth sense about when there's going to be an earthquake or something?
NEO: Yeah...?
DINGO: Well...
>Mike: (Dingo) We think it's cool, too!

(Just then, the ground began to shake)

COCO: Earthquake!

(Then a warp orb opened and they fell in)

>Tom: The end

(They get out of the theatre)

(Back on the bridge)

TOM: Gee, that was a bit painful.
CROW: Yeah, and only six more parts to go
**********************************
Mike and the bots enter the theatre once again.

AKU AKU: Crash, Crash can you hear me?
>Tom: (Aku aku) I mean we feel to the centre of the Earth, at about 33,000 feet, so I just wanna make sure you're fine)

(It seemed Aku Aku had been caught in the quake, too.)

AKU AKU: Crash?
>Mike: (Aku Aku) If you're dead, just let me know, cause I gotta go somewhere.
CRASH: ...

(Crash shook his head. Man, was his head killing him! He got up. He forgot about the pain in his head and remembered the pain in his shoulder.)

>Crow: Yeah probably because he fell over 33 miles into the Earth!
CRASH: AAAAHHH!!
AKU AKU: I guess that's a 'yes'
>Mike: (Aku aku) Damn, he's alive!
DINGO: Ouch...
>Crow: (Dingo) My tender man skin!

(Dingo also got up.)

DINGO: Where are we?
CRASH: (thinking) Some place cold...(starts to shiver)
>Tom: Oh, they're at Al Gore’s house.
TINY: Ooooo... Tiny head hurt... Whoa, where'd that come from?
EVERYONE: O.o(?)
>Mike: uh okay..what did Tiny just see? Help, movie? Can you show us something? Hello?
TINY: What?
>Crow: (Crash) Oh man, now I can see why they call him 'Tiny'. Ewwww!
>Tom: Crow!
>Crow: Sorry.
AKU AKU: I didn't know Tiny could talk that well.
TINY: T-Tiny?!
AKU AKU: A-huh.
TINY: B-but I'm Pura!
EVERYONE: WHAT?!
>Tom: Boy, I guess when you fall over 33 miles into the Earth, you automatically think you're a cat I guess.
CRASH: ^O.O^(?)
TINY: I mean, I FEEL like Tiny...
AKU AKU: You're right, I feel like Aku Aku.
>Mike: (Aku Aku) with a side of fries and vegetables.
DINGO: You ARE, mate!
AKU AKU: WHAT?!

MEANWHILE

>Crow: And the editor comes to the writer's rescue!!
NEO: Help, I've fallen and can't get up....
>Mike: (Neo) Cause my spine's probably been damaged by that immense fall, but that's OK, I'm alive.
COCO: That's because the bear and tiger are on you, idiot....
NEO: Hmm? (looks up) Hey! Get off! (Polar and Pura do) (to Coco) And as for you, don't ever talk to me like that, girl!
>Crow: (Neo) Now go to your room!
COCO: Who you callin' 'girl'?
>Mike: (Coco) I'm a huge (BLEEP) for your info!
NEO: (sigh) You really are an idiot, aren't you, Coco?
>Tom: (Neo) And you're not a natural blonde either are you?
COCO: I'M YOUR BOSS!!
>Mike: Demi Moore as a bandicoot!
NEO: Say what?
>Crow: (Neo) Say what? Whazzup!! Peace!! Gettin' jiggy with it...
>Mike: Okay that's enough.
>Crow: Sorry.
MEGUMI: OK, I'm hearin' things...
>Tom: (Megumi) Better lay off the heroin.
NEO & COCO: (?)
MEGUMI: I thought you said that you were Uka Uka.
NEO: She did.
COCO: I did.
>Crow: *Sigh* Yeah, we pretty much figured it out already movie!
MEGUMI: That means I'm not hearing things and that means I do sound like Megumi.
>Tom: (Megumi) Course I forget what I sound like at times; I'm not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
NEO: You mean you're not?
MEGUMI: No, I'm Ami.
>Mike: Lovely Ami, Ami, Ami! (Beatles song here)
NEO & COCO: (!)
NEO: WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?!
>Crow: Why don't we ask… THE GREEN HAIRED ONE!!
*************************************
DINGO: OK, first things first.
>Crow: We gotta tape the hockey game.
"PURA": That would be...?
DINGO: To find your bodies.
>Tom: No (BLEEP).
"PURA": And how are we going to do that?
>Mike: Well… check the local D.O.A I can imagine.
DINGO: Well, they shouldn't be too far....
"PURA": Oh, great....
>Crow: Uh… is sarcasm really necessary at this point?
DINGO: Shut up, cat, or you're toast!
"PURA": Oh yeah?
DINGO: Yeah!
>Tom: N'yah!!
"COCO" That's enough!
BOTH: Sorry...
>Crow: Sorry Ms. MeatBall head.
"COCO" That's better. Now, as Dingo said, they shouldn't be too far...
>Mike: Yeah; a limb may be over there, a torso over there, and a leg around somewhere..
DINGO: Ummmm... one more thing…
"COCO": What's that?
>Tom: I want to get a reaccount for my missing body.
DINGO: We also need to find out why Crash and I haven't changed. I mean, you ARE Crash, right?
>Crow: Well lemme look down my pants and see.

(Crash nods)

VOICE: Don't forget Cortex!

(The four turn to see Crash's girlfriend, Tawna, her sister, Liz, Ami, Megumi, Polar, Pura, Coco, and Neo.)

NEO: Hi...
"PURA": OK, who's who?
TAWNA: I'm Liz.
>Mike: Wha...who!?!?
LIZ: Tawna.
AMI: Megumi.
MEGUMI: Ami.
>Tom: And Moe, Larry, and Curly.
"PURA" (pointing to Pura) I'm guessing he's Tiny
>Crow: I can just tell.

(He nods)

DINGO: Who's Polar?
POLAR: Ruff!
"COCO": Looks like he's the same, too

(Polar nods)
>Mike: I must agree with that, apple head.
"TAWNA": Then who and where's Aku Aku?
NEO: Who knows and who cares?
>Tom: Ah cram it world!!
VOICE: I'm right here

(Crash looked around. He saw a crate with a picture of Aku Aku on it. He went up, spun it, and out came Uka Uka.)

>Crow :Oh (BLEEP)... they released John Hurt!!
CRASH: AH!
UKA UKA: It's just me, child!
>Tom: Child? Is that a pet name for Crash?
>Mike: DON'T start.
>Tom: Sorry.

(Crash looked very confused. So did Neo. He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out.)

NEO: EAP!
>Crow: EAP????
"UKA UKA": What's wrong?

(Neo mouths something that looks like 'My voice!')

(?!)

"MEGUMI": This is insane!!

>Crow: Same thing the writer's probably saying.

(Later, the team is thinking of ways to get back.)

"AMI": We can ask N. Gin for help
"COCO": Yeah, that might work...
>Tom: Yeah! They should have thought of this three topics ago.
VOICE: Let me get this straightt...

(A voice came out of nowhere. It had a heavy Australian accent. At first everyone thought it was Dingo, but it went on)
>Mike: Damn...it's Steve Erwin.
VOICE: Coco is Aku Aku, Aku Aku is Uka Uka, and Uka Uka is Coco. Tiny is Pura and Pura is Tiny. Tawna and Liz have swiched. So have Ami and Megumi. Dingo and Polar have stayed exactly the same and the Doc has lost his voice and I've somehow found it. Is that right?
>Crow: Good back story anonimous voice.
ALL: CRASH?!
CRASH: (the accent it gone now) What?
"COCO": You can talk?!
CRASH: Aaaaa...yeah, I just said that. (No pun intended)
>Mike: I just automatically gained vocal chords.
"TAWNA": But, how?
CRASH: I just said I didn't know! What are you starring at?
>Crow: Your fly's open!
"UKA UKA": You and that giant plant behind you.
CRASH: AH! (jumps behind Dingo)
>Mike: The dingo will shield me from the plant.
DINGO: (?)
CRASH: I don't like giant plants!

(Then, they realized that there were giant plants.)

>Tom: Yeah that's been established.

(They bolted)

>Crow: Our heroes... people who are afraid of plants!!!
************************************
(One of the plaints was chasing the two masks. Another Coco and Pura. One Tawna, Liz, Ami, and Megumi. One Dingo and Polar and the last one, Crash and Neo.)

>Crow: so plants have legs?
>Mike: Guess so.
CRASH: Wait, this is a MAN eating plaint, right?

(Neo nods. Crash stops running)

CRASH: Then I don't need to worry.

(He was right, the plaint zoomed past him and kept running after Neo)

NEO: (thinking) Why that little....
>Tom: Oh I'll show him… I'll go get a bandicoot-eating plant.
"COCO": Crash!
CRASH: What?
"COCO": That wasn't very nice.
Crow: Huh?
CRASH: Fine, I'll go save 'im then.
>Mike: Really?
"COCO": Now I never said that.
>Tom: C'mon lady!!
"AKU AKU": Crash, Coco...
CRASH: OK, OK...
>Mike: All right, I'll go save the guy who could throw the world into chaos.

(Crash runs up to the plaint and spins it.)

CRASH: There! Happy?
"AKU AKU": Very

(As it would seem, everyone eles had beaten their plaints, too.)

>Tom: By throwing piles of weed killer on them.
CRASH: Well, that was fun, but next time, let's save ourselves the trouble and roll around in gravel.
>Crow: What the heck is he implying?
"COCO": We've got to fine a way back
>Mike: Yeah, brilliant strategy.
"PURA": Let's go down to Cortex's lab and see if N. Gin can help us.
"TAWNA": Good idea
>Tom: Yeah I'm sure he won't automatically kill us if he sees us.

(So they headed off to Cortex Castle)

>Crow: And they all died - the end.
>Mike: No… it's not over yet.
>Crow: Awwww.
*********************************
(When they got to the castle, they saw N. Gin working on an experiment of some sort.)

>Mike: These are the same evil scientists who invented Surge.
CRASH: Hi!
NATE: (jumping) What the...?
"COCO": Long story. We need your help.
>Tom: Very polite… don't say 'hi' or anything, just barge in and cut to the chase.

A MINUTE OR SO LATER

"COCO": ...And here we are
>Crow: Or where we were SUPPOSED to be!
NATE: I see. Well, what am I supposed to do?
CRASH: Make a potion or something.
>Mike: Can you super size it?
NATE: It's not that simple
"COCO": Well, whatever, just hurry
>Crow: Geez lady...give him time!
>Tom: Yeah… world's most impatient and delusional bandicoot.

(With that, Nate and Neo set off to work leaving the others to sit and hope they would find a way to get back.)

>Mike: And yet they play 'Fungo'.
**********************************
(The Crash Team sat waiting for Nate and Neo to finish the antidote for whatever had happened to them. Crash, however, was not in a rush to get back. It would mean that he wouldn't be able to talk anymore. As Crash sat thinking about this, elsewhere the plants were reporting back to their master.)

>Mike: So being mute is just a placebo?
>Crow: Guess so.
MAN: What happened to you?

The plants re-enacted the scene with the Team. Their master had a sore look on his face.

>Tom: Yeah - each plant member gets payed in 'Miracle Grow'.
MAN: Blasted bandicoot...

(He grabbed his sword and took some swings at the air.)

MAN: I'll get him, and I have a feeling it'll be soon....
>Crow: And though he's eluded so many people; I still feel da urge!

(After several hours, Nate and Neo came out.)

"PURA": Did ya' get the antidote?
NATE: More than that. We found out exactly what happened to you.
>Mike: We found that out with a prostate exam on Crash and Coco… you're next.
"MEGUMI": Well...?
>Crow: (Nate) Did… Did I stop?

NATE: What you fell into was a 'WarpWorld'. These WarpWorlds open when there's an earthquake. In them, anything can happen, even switching bodies.
>Tom: Oh VERY logical explanation.
"UKA UKA": This is very interesting and all, but how do we get back?
NATE: By drinking this. (holds up a beaker with a blue liquid in it) But you have to go back to the site where the WarpWorld originally opened.
>Mike: Hey...it's Smurf urine!!
>Crow: Ewww.

(Half of the team had already bolted out the door.)

>Tom: (Nate) Wait... you didn't let me do your proctology examinations yet!

Mike and the bots exit out of the theatre; but they trip on their way out!!!
********************************
Crow: Ow… bad fall!
Tom: Yeah… tell ‘em about it Mike!
Crow: I'm Crow!!
Tom: Huh? Wha… oh geez.… I sound like you now!!
Mike: Hey guys!!
Crow: OH… and now Mike sounds like Servo!!
Tom: Aw damn… don't tell ‘em we fell into a 'WarpWorld'.
Mike: Geee...would appear that way!
Crow: We have WarpWorlds on board?
Tom: Aw geez… I feel like Canadian bacon right now!
Mike: That's odd...I have this crazy hankerin' to yell "JJJJJJEEEEEDDDDD"!!!
Crow: Yeah… and I feel insecure and stupid!
Mike: Hey!!!!!
Crow: Well sorry Mike… but I do. After all; I got YOUR voice now… and probably half of your brain!
Tom: We'll be right back. Aw geez; I feel like cheese whiz now!
Mike: c'mon; even I know I'm not dumb.
Tom: Who me?
Mike: No me?
Tom: Yeah I know me; cause you ARE me?
Mike: No… I meant Mike!!
Crow: Me!?!?
Mike :Aw geez!! Cambot… go to commercial!!
****************************************
(Back from break)

MIKE: Yes, I hear the voices
TOM: No! Those are mine!
CROW: I'm so confused...

(red light blinks)

MIKE: Uh, oh. Come on guys, let's go
(In theatre)

(After sometime of getting sorted out, the switched team members each drank some of the liquid, shivered at the awful taste, and waited for something to happen)

>Mike: Wait, what just happened?
"TAWNA": Nothing happened!
>Mike: Oh.
NATE: Wait for it...
>Crow: OK.
(The Crew waits, holding their breath, then choke)

(A second later, there was a great flash of light. When it died down, everyone looked around and then cheered. They were back to normal)

>Tom: OK, so we just need to get a really big flashlight and we'll be back to normal!
CRASH: (thinking) I wonder...(out loud) Hey, Doc! You got your voice back?
>Crow: No, you still got it, duh!
NEO: (hoarsely) Sorta…

(Everyone was happy to be back in their bodies and was heading home, except Crash, Coco, Aku Aku, and Neo)

COCO: So Crash has a voice and Neo still has his?
>Tom: Naw, Crash was just doing his ventriloquist act.
CRASH: Yeah, so now I can smack him and yell at him (hits Neo)
>Mike: Oh, yes, of course
NEO: Ah!
AKU AKU: Aaaaa, guys, turn around.
>Crow: Lots of 'A's in that sentence.
CRASH: (singing) ...Bright eyes...
>Mike: God, NOOOOOO!
>Tom: AHHHHH!

(Crow falls over)

COCO: No, really, turn around

SHUN!

(Too late. The giant plant that had been standing behind them had run through Crash and Neo.)

>Crew: YEAH!!
CRASH: Ya' know, that kinda hurt...(falls over)
>Crow: So, brains didn't come with the voice?
COCO: CRASH!

(She ran over to him as he and Neo fell to the ground)

To be continued is 'Crash Bandicoot: Seeing Double'

>Tom: There's another one?!
>Crow: Naw, they're just joking, they really die, right Mike?
>Mike: ...
>Crow: Right?! NOOOOOOOOO!!
>Mike: Come on, maybe we can fall through the WarpWorld on our way out.
>Crow: No, make it stop...

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