Psats, What A Bitch...

Once, when pondering the true meaning of hell, I came to conclusion, that it would have to be Madame Carriéres golf class which they have mistakenly called a gym class at my school. Unfortunately I have had an even more demonic experience, that being the taking of my pSATs. Now, some would say, its just a simple test, why do you find it such a punishment? And I would answer, have you ever taken one?! For those who actually have taken a pSAT, you will be aware of the multitude of questions you have to answer before actually taking the test. Hundreds of questions such as my name, ethnical group and religion are asked, and i wonder, what am i planning to achieve with this test? And as i wonder, slowly, yet surely, an Iron Maiden song, which i have only ever heard once or twice, creeps into my mind. The name i don’t know, the words are just infantile ‘la di dums’ in my head, but its there, and eventually, my whole thought process revolves around the mystery Iron Maiden song. And i begin the test. An hour goes by, and i am really into the whole,’i have to do good’, thing. The song is still in my mind, and i try my hardest to push it aside. Break creeps up on me, and i spend the WHOLE five minutes trying to get in a meditative state, i am tiered, and my eyes are sore, and i need to relax. Now the second hour starts, and i am incredibly impressed with my cleverness, i have figured out some hard questions, and pat myself on the back. And just as i mentally give myself a high five, the music blares, Iron Maiden takes up my whole brain, and i think about them, about my habits, about my morals, and i remember my very first question, what the fuck do i expect to gain with this shitty test? ‘Great’ schools such as Harvard and Princeton exploit our brains, trying to figure out, who is the best, by asking us 3 hours worth of questions. No one cares how creative, and how great you are with people, it is simply how well you can pick up, store, and regurgitate information that appeals to them. And as the rest of my classmates surcome to this intellectual prostitution called pSATs i realize that i can’t take part, i can’t even passively take part in this. There comes to a point that the standards becomes so odious, that i can’t take anymore. So i did what any morally conscious anarchist would do, i filled in all the C circles in the remaining test (because everyone knows the most common answer is C...) and i began to meditate, in the stiff chair, my head resting on my pSAT booklet. It had been so long since i had been able to meditate, my mind has not been at rest since i began the school year. But this meditation, would have to be my most profound experience yet, and i know its because i was able to reject the educational standards set by those capitalists in their suits and ties, and i let one smart cookie not become another high number on a sheet for conformist schools.