Monsters, Music, and Muscles

1. What made you decide to become a "horror host"?

Aside from the fact that I was bitten by a WEREWOLF a number of centuries ago, you mean? Or, that the Telly is such an attractive medium by which to educate and entertain the Human population, via the Message of MONSTERDOM? Leaving that very involved History for a later telling, allow me to introduce to you my Best Friend, and, oddly omniscient Alter-Ego, TIMOTHY FRANCIS HERRON, B.G.G. (Trust me, MONSTER-LOVERS, I don't make a move without first considering the merits of his wisely apt counsel! I've dubbed him 'oddly omniscient' because he exhibits the unique capacity of always seeming to know what I'll be doing next!) So, in part, we'll combine his 'Take' on these matters with our insightful Review of: THE BARON Von WOLFSTEIN CHRONICLES... (at this point, TIMOTHY weighs in) Greetings, WHISPER; On behalf of all the assorted denizen who hang around CASTLE Von WOLFSTEIN (some of them quite literally), I shall attempt to answer your question: "What made you decide to become a HORROR HOST?" There are certain things, which, I believe, are fore-ordained, and, as such, are inescapable... I was born with a fascination of ALL THINGS MONSTER-OUS. Since the late 1940's - early 1950's was largely pre-TV, and, since, no self-respecting parent would inflict MOVIE MONSTERS upon their wee tykes in that era, I gravitated to books, drawings, and, museum exhibits rife with the scary predecessors of the Movie Monsters, which had, in fact, inhabited the natural realm: Dinosaurs, Reptiles (snakes, turtles, lizards, but, most especially the Crocodilian family), and, Amphibians, abounded within my inner-visual landscape whilst I was growing up, begging to be brought forth into physical manifestation. I largely attribute the development of my artistic abilities to those Prehistoric Boogiemen, and, their present-day spawn, for, I spent much of my young life drawing, painting, or, sculpting their likeness in clay. I managed to turn my room into a kind of museum. My collection of fossils sprawled across the room. My fascination for a number of the afore-mentioned life-forms, gained my parent's kind allowance to let me care for such creatures in various enclosures and aquariums. From 7th grade through my sophomore year in high school, I raised several South-American Caiman in my bedroom, since owning their American counterpart was illegal... Fossil-hunting in the Mid-West, where I was raised, yielded numerous fossils: trilobites, cephalopods, brachiopods, and, crinoids; to name the major sedimentary remains that my comrades and I collected. The portion of Ohio, wherein I relished my nascent vitality, had, some 400 million years previously, been the site of a large, pre-historic, shallow ocean... How does this relate to HORROR HOSTING? Well, by physically becoming those objects of interest. Thus, the skills of make-up and acting were called forth! By way of example: The most unforgettable HALLOWEEN of my early years was when I was 5; my Beloved Mom, BARBARA, and, I, engineered a TYRANNOSAURUS REX Costume. Coupled with my very active imagination, I happily prowled, loped, and, leapt across that year's enchanted terrain of October 31st, as if it were still the Jurassic Era; and, gobbled the treats with a gustatory delight, as if they were my hapless prey! In the latter 1950's, I discovered THE MONSTERS of the Cinema: The UNIVERSAL CLASSICS; along with the unique serendipity of MONSTER MAGAZINES, my penchant for the Art of Make-Up found a new home, and, a renewed passion. I zealously spent my early teens through my late twenties in the accurate re-creation and re-enactment of these amazing Beings.... One defining moment, post-high school, which I remember with precise clarity: 'Twas the day when my Mom asked me the typically curious parent's angst-filled question: "What do you want to be when you grow up, Timmy?" Without hesitation, I responded: "I'll have my own Monster Movie Show on Television." I SAW it Inside my BEING, and, KNEW, with every fiber of my BEING, that it would come to pass. Several years later, it did... birthed with the glorious aid of BARON Von WOLFSTEIN and FRIENDS! In likewise, when the show was cancelled, for reasons that shall, shortly, be addressed more fully within this interview, I KNEW that I was not finished with this business of THE MONSTERS....

2. How did Baron Von Wolfstein come to be?

Hmmm, rather a long story there. However, I've no wish to either short-circuit, or, overly swamp CYBER-SPACE with painstakingly voluminous recollections from total recall; NOT, at least, on THIS Auspicious Occasion; so, here is a colorful synopsis, again, provided by Timothy: I 'discovered' the MONSTERS at the latter end of the '50's decade. An issue of FAMOUS MONSTERS OF FILMLAND stared back at me from the magazine rack at Bemus Point on Lake Chautauqua, during a family summer vacation that year. Of course, my folks refused to buy it for me. Within a year or two, I found a local source to purchase them in my hometown, as well as the other monster magazines in print at that time. I was HOOKED; totally ENTHRALLED! THE CLASSIC MONSTERS Became my Life! Compounded by the addition of THE SHOCK THEATRE Package on TV, which 'brought to Life(?)' those inspiring CLASSIC MONSTER Photos; and, locating theatrical make-up shops that were easily accessible, those FAMOUS MONSTERS became a viable reality in my everyday world. My 1st production was a HAUNTED ROOM at my grade school's yearly carnival, when I was in the 7th grade. I re-created the role of COUNT DRACULA for that year's Haunted Room, with the future vision of creating HAUNTED HOUSES for CHARITY stemming from this pivotal experience. This occurred in 1961, and, then, again, in 1962. In 1963, I helped to create a HAUNTED ROOM for the grade-school where Mom taught 1st grade. A couple of photographs of me as FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER from that still exist... My love of recreating the Classic Monsters persisted throughout the '60's, culminating in the Mile-stone (tomb-stone;?) of designing, building, and, acting in the 1971 WSAI & Sycamore-Deer Park JayCees HAUNTED HOUSE FOR CHARITY. It was this event, which inaugurated the entire HAUNTED ATTRACTION Movement. My Brother-in-Acting and Make-up, BOB LIPKA, Jr. was responsible for such a timely 'KISMET'. Amassing $70,000 in 9 days (at $1.00 per ticket) word spread like wild-fire, that: "THAR'S GOLD IN THEM-THAR MONSTERS!" News of such lucrative spoils could not be ignored, spawning 3 additional Houses in Cincinnati the following October, with several others cropping up in out-lying areas. The growth of This Scary Form of Entertainment was exponential! I continued to lead this all-out charge for most of that decade, even branching out to do other HAUNTED HOUSES in Indiana as the '70's wound down. All told, the HAUNTED HOUSES for which I was directly responsible, hauled in the very hefty sum of an excess of three-quarters of a Million Dollars. My Attractions never charged more than a dollar per visit. Bitten by the THEATRE-VAMPIRE; oops, THEATRE-BUG, more than a decade previously, I piled up numerous stage credits. This served as the training for what would, in 1978, become: BARON Von WOLFSTEIN Presents SATURDAY NIGHT With The MONSTERS It was the Theatre, which, most directly, led to the BARON'S Birth. Whilst a troupe member of Vincennes University's Summer Theatre Program, in 1977, I was cast in the role written for, and, originally performed on Broadway by, BORIS KARLOFF; the evil Jonathan Brewster in ARSENIC AND OLD LACE. Thank you, LILLIAN GIELLO-KLIPSCH, you wonderful director, and, Friend, you! Colouring my presentation of the role out of homage to BORIS, I adapted both his dialect, and, those sinister cadences reminiscent of KING KARLOFF'S speech patterns. Although I'd considered my primary HORROR inspiration as being BELA LUGOSI, due to my stint as "BROTHER JONATHAN" I became an even more sincere devotee of WILLIAM HENRY PRATT! When the metaphorical 'coin' was tossed nearly a year later, to decide in the favor of the Anchoring MONSTER to assault the Channel 4 air-waves, a decidedly 'BORIS' Von WOLFSTEIN won out over the usual preference of a 'BELA'-Inspired VAMPIRE.

3. Can you give us an idea of what your show was like; what some of its contents, or, direction was about?

TIMOTHY, speaking for BARON Von WOLFSTEIN: Suffice it to say, the Show's 'evolution' was a dynamic experiment in 'cross-breeding': We started in April of 1978, and, were cancelled at the year's end... SNL was tough competition! I managed to keep a tape of roughly 10 episodes, out of the 40 that I created. My ideas/scripting, etc, MICHAEL B.WHITE'S superb technical execution, and, the station's impossible programming demands (likely, more on this later in the interview...) made for an "ANYTHING GOES" Opportunity. But, it was the inner demand for authenticity, sincerity, and, reverence for the Realm of the MONSTER that prevailed as the prime directives for the show, and, happily, remained intact, as being the guiding pre-requisite to the show's major purpose, content, and, theme. As with any good HORROR HOSTED SHOW, our Show was Character-Driven. An Audience wants to, and, indeed, HAS to connect with PERSONS; nowhere is this more evident than in the HORROR HOSTING Genre. Mere philosophies, ideas, or, clever 'bits' won't sustain an Audience's interest, or, build then ever-expanding fan base needed for HOSTING Longevity. Then, as tributaries flowing into the river, the character variations, the humor, the serious insight, and, the dramatic tension all fed into the organically evolving realm of CASTLE Von WOLFSTEIN. Beginning with the BARON'S sworn duty to reveal MONSTERDOM'S Secret Nature, and, how this impacted, and, reflected in the Human sphere of Being, the audience was introduced to a MONSTER who held his course as being a HORROR HISTORIAN/Philosopher. Having been Human, until a WEREWOLF'S Bite transformed him with the Lycanthropic Curse centuries ago, BARON Von WOLFSTEIN delved deeply into the Supernatural, aligning himself with The Highest Powers of Good, to 'Transcend' his hideous plight. 'Tis a story still in the telling. Aided by his closest of comrades, CARLYLE, The Invisible Wizard, who's further 'take' on an arcane subject that would've been, essentially, a monologue, had, by the addition of his 'voice', turned the proceedings into a dialogue. The atmosphere of the show took on a more expansive quality, and, began to flower; blossoming into a more individual direction. As time went on, both ROBIN GRAVES, The Grave Robber, and, The Evil VAMPIRE COUSIN became stalwarts of the cast, whose presences would influence the dramatic tensions of the scripting, and, allow for a more "Story within a Storyline" to evolve. (Yes, TIMOTHY played all of the 4 major character roles, plus, several minor ones... and, according to all reports, enjoyed himself immensely in so doing!) The Audience agreed. According to the Neilson Ratings, we held the steady interest of an audience of 58,000, on a weekly basis... and, we were situated across from SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE, when it was composed of John Belushi, Dan Ackroyd, Bill Murray, and, all the rest of that original, stellar cast. Several of the 200+ Fan letters received the final 4 months of the BARON'S 8 months of weekly creativity basically summed up the viewers' feeling of: "Forget the Movies; you do the entire hour and a half!" (The BARON'S 'time allotment per episode was a meager 10 minutes.)

4. How did your look come to be?

BARON Von WOLFSTEIN: Well, initially, the FULL MOON played a rather large part! I'll defer, here, to Timothy once again, for his recounting of the more seminal history of events... I developed BARON Von WOLFSTEIN for a HAUNTED HOUSE Commercial, which ran as a PSA on Channel 4, in 1977, as well as for print ads in the Bloomington paper for that year's HAUNTED HOUSE. When Channel 4 tapped me for the HORROR HOSTING slot, recently vacated by SAMMY TERRY, it was because I'd appeared on THE COWBOY BOB SHOW, as a 'kinder, gentler' COUNT DRACULA, so as not to offend or frighten his younger viewers. I did this in order to advertise my 1977 Bloomington HAUNTED HOUSE to as vast an audience as possible. I decided, for the sake of a TV pilot, to choose the greater breadth of character possibilities inherent within a 'BORIS-flavored' BARON Von WOLFSTEIN. The 'Transcendent' WEREWOLF Make-up idea appealed to me, as well. Plus, my shoulder-length hair, and, full beard predisposed me to adapt to hirsute circumstances. Being a WEREWOLF was, initially, "a piece of cake"... until I had to adapt my luxuriant tresses and facial glory to play other roles! "SHAVE & A HAIRCUT, TWO BITS!" Thanks to my dear Brother, KEVIN HANEY, (OSCAR WINNER for MAKE-UP; DRIVING MISS DAISY, as well as being a Multiple EMMY Winner) for sharing his gift of an old Indian foam latex appliance that he'd created the previous year when he was chief Make-up Artist for the out-door drama TECUMSEH, and, which, I was able to 're-vamp' (with minor alterations) into a visage necessary for a WEREWOLF TV HORROR HOST, I was off and running. 4 months into the show's run, KEVIN'S mask 'bit the dust', so, I added ROBIN GRAVES and The evil VAMPIRE COUSIN to the mix, until I could make a new foam latex visage for the BARON.

5. What are some of your favorite horror movies?

TIMOTHY: As you may have guessed, from reading thus far, I am a bona-fide, starry-eyed, die-hard UNIVERSAL CLASSIC MONSTERS Kinda Guy! Of course, THE HAMMER Catalogue, as well as the GODZILLA/Japanese Film line-up also occupy a hallowed place of respect within my Pantheon of Cinematic MONSTERDOM. I've seen only a smattering of HORROR Genre films from the mid-'70's through the New Millennium. I have a great deal of catching up to do... I've been most fortunate in that respect; my recent refuge in the GHASTLEE MANOR has provided me with a Television of many channels (talk about a Novelty!) whilst I made Masks and paintings. I've seen a number of Monster movies that I'd have otherwise missed.

6. Who are some of your favorite actors?

Anybody who sent shivers up my spine, and, in so doing, INSPIRED a deeper sense of, and, commitment to, COMPASSION within my heart, or, a sense of the Unseen Mystery that is constantly about us, through the honesty of their performance! MONSTERS are the most striking aspect of 'The Outsider', or, 'The Other' Archetype... It may seem too easy to cite the consistent performances of the Hollywood greats, but, it is a unforgettable roster, well worth repeating: BORIS, and, BELA, LON (Sr. & Jr.), BASIL, GEORGE, LIONEL, HENRY (HULL & LAUGHTON), DWIGHT, MAX... the list is too long to print. Then, of course, the venerable creations of CHRISTOPHER and PETER, from the HAMMER Series. The very credibly believable work from so many modern actors, many of whom I might not recognize out of make-up, or, with whose careers I am unfamiliar, prove that there's still life in the old Genre yet!

7. Did you have any favorite "horror hosts" yourself?

WILLIE THALL & THE BARGAIN CITY KID hosted the UNIVERSAL Movie Package when I first saw it... but, they were not HORROR HOSTS, per se. But, I was young, and, enjoyed their vaudevillian antics. Then, SHOCK THEATRE, with its brief montage of the UNIVERSAL MONSTERS... again, HOST-less. In my latter high school years, THE COOL GHOUL, DICK Von HOENE, appeared on Channel 19 in Cincinnati. My elder Brother, MICHAEL WALLACE HERRON, was one of his camera crew. MIKE was also on camera for BOB SHREVE'S All-Night Movies, which usually housed a UNIVERSAL MONSTER CLASSIC, set in the film-fare rotation as the final offering of the night, which ended, quite happily, around dawn. That was often a weekly treat for me, for a year or two! I watched SAMMY TERRY whilst partying towards a University degree, way back in the late '60's - the early '70's; even hired him for one of my Bloomington HAUNTED HOUSES.

8. Have you any advice for anyone who would like to follow in the BARON'S footsteps?

BARON Von WOLFSTEIN: YES!!! WATCH WHERE YOU STEP!!! I am an ANIMAL, after all! (Just JOKING- I'm thoroughly house-broken ...even potty-trained, but, I just couldn't resist the urge to pun!) Speaking of urges, you'll pardon me, whilst I answer the Call of Nature; here's TIMOTHY, once again, during my absence, to add his Tuppence to the mix... There's the old saying, that: "Everything old is new again." Of course, that could be a mis-translation from some ancient axiom, which held an entirely different meaning. Modern Authorities of Lexiconographic Puzzles have resorted to fisticuffs, and, duels at dawn (which is why so few good Lexicographers remain), to resolve their dispute of the proper translation... but, they all freely admit that it might have been rendered as: "Ever Been sold to Newts? Amen!" or, "Everything bold is Soup, m'friend." or, "Ever seen old folks in the nude, &, grin?" or, "Ever been told to poop again?" and, lastly, "Ever worn Golden Suits? Depends." If even the so-called 'Experts' disagree among themselves upon such a simple thing, then, how are we, 'the collective unconscious', expected to carry on as civilized beings? Hmmm? Oh, sorry... I did digress a bit, didn't I?! *A-HEM* BECOMING A HORROR HOST! Well, The BARON and I thought that we'd "covered our tracks" rather well, considering the short debacle of our humble beginnings on television. But, despite our march into oblivion, there were some who cared, and, even, one who followed... and, he's the main reason weeee'rree baaaaaacckk!! The main reason that we've re-surfaced, after a Quarter-Century's Hiatus, is because of the old Fans: CLEVELAND SHARP, who was BARON Von WOLFSTEIN'S #1 Fan of that era, as well as The Loyal Fans, who wrote in to: E-GOR'S CHAMBER OF TV HORROR HOSTS to alert him of our previous broadcasting glory, in those halcyon days of yore. Through E-GOR'S sincere Friendship, and, Brotherhood, and, his fine Website, I made the acquaintance of COUNT GORE DeVOL'S charming Domain: http://www.horrorhosts@yahoogroups.com 'Twas there that we 'cyber-met' my "Illegitimate Step-son", A. GHASTLEE GHOUL!!! He had been a Big Fan of HORROR HOSTS, and, the combined influence of DR. CREEP, THE COOL GHOUL, and, I'm Honored to say, My Humble Efforts, so corrupted his brain that the only thing he was good for, after soaking in our ghoulish offerings, was to become a HORROR HOST Himself... something he has done now for 13 PLUS YEARS! In Dayton, Ohio, no less! He has proven himself an example of the finest Inspiration to all HORROR HOSTS, old and New! We Work together now... and, not merely he and I, but, with so many side-kicks, cohorts, comrades, and, Fellow HORROR HOSTS, why, I simply call it THE MONSTER FANG-MILY!

9. What kind of music does the Baron like to listen to?

My tastes, in the musical sphere, cover a wide range; I enjoy a catholicity of musical eras and styles. Outside of the Classical era, I have a real penchant for JAZZ, and, '60's & '70's POP! I sing, drum, and, compose music, as well. JAZZ LEGEND, DAVID BAKER, and, his Lovely Wife, LIDA, were Fans of our show from the old days, as well as being dear Friends! CHAD STUART, of CHAD And JEREMY Fame, and, I, are also in Friendly communications, via Cyber-Space, at present. He is a Great Soul, as well as an impeccable musician, singer, composer, and, writer. He and JEREMY CLYDE are re-uniting to record and tour again, and, I plan to meet them, in person, in the summer of 2004 at their concerts in California. Check out their website, at: http://www.chadandjeremy.net PETER NOONE, aka HERMAN, of THE HERMITS Fame, and, I, have also volleyed a number of silly salvos of humorous postings across cyber-Space. He's still larking about the concert tour stage, and, occasionally, acting on the Telly. I mention all of these fine folks because it proves that there is life after fame, and, everybody's got to be somewhere! The fact that they are all still true to their Muse gives me hope for the Human Race, let alone my humble ventures. Aside from my claim to 'fame' as being a KARAOKE Veteran, SUSPIRA, GHASTLEE, and, I have done some impromptu musical gigs of late, all of which were well received at various conventions! The Musical aspect of our multi-faceted talent-pool reminds us, that, the Best is yet to be!

10. Do you think "horror hosts" are making a comeback?

BARON Von WOLFSTEIN: Indubitably! Thanks to public access, and, to a few savvy commercial program directors, HORROR HOSTS are proliferating at an alarmingly exponential rate! As proof of my assertion, simply traipse on over to: http://www.HorrorHosts.com to view the astounding array of current HORROR HOSTS across the GOOD OLD US of A, and, even, The Premiere HORROR HOSTESS of JOLLY OLDE ENGLAND, NINA! 'Twas the likes of COUNT GORE DeVOL and DR.CREEP (BARRY HOBART) who kept the HORROR HOSTING Fires Burning Brightly, when the programming directors of most commercial TV stations had grown cold to the option of employing a local HORROR HOST. DR. CREEP is celebrating something on the order of 30 PLUS years of HORROR HOSTING! We are all proud of him, and, in his indefatigable example, he rather puts the ENERGIZER BUNNY to shame! As for the rumor of HORROR HOSTS taking over Commercial TV someday soon, well, to cop a line from AH-NOLDT: "Ve'll Be BACHK!"

11. Do you go to many conventions; what do you think of them?

The HORROR Convention Circuit is a fairly recent event, building with an almost predictably geologic, sedimentary stratum, from the humblest beginnings, nearly 30 years ago. They did not exist in my area, when I was a "famous unknown" TV Star, so, my awareness of how viably vital the HORROR Genre Buffs really are, was not a factor that came to play in my HOSTING Longevity at that juncture. "NO TIME LIKE THE PRESENT!" Thanks to GHASTLEE and SUSPIRA'S Courteous Benevolence, I've had the unparalleled pleasure of attending nearly every 'CON', as they're called, since last year's CINEMA WASTELAND! I LOVE THEM!!! Every aspect! And, The HORROR HOST Presence at them can only improve, and, bode well for a higher public profile on the Telly for us all. Meeting Folks from every aspect of the Industry; actors/actresses, technical artists, suppliers, fans, an amazing assortment of excellent, high-caliber people, to be sure. Ariann, as you'll doubtless recall, we can trace our first meeting to the inaugural event for the newest HORROR Convention in Pittsburgh, known as MONSTERBURGH. 'Twas a delight to connect with you, and, now, to share my views with your readership!

12.What is the Baron doing these days? Are there any upcoming projects you'd like to share with us?

BARON Von WOLFSTEIN Well, the most prominently new-worthy item on the HORROR HOST Horizon is the October 3rd, 4th, and, 5th, CINEMA WASTELAND taking place in Strongsville, Ohio, just outside of Cleveland proper. Imagine, if you will, a super-abundance of HORROR HOSTS gathering from across the country, to celebrate the Event of the Millennium! I, of course, am referring to THE WEDDING of SUSPIRA and A.GHASTLEE GHOUL! PAM and KEN KISH, the fiendish Creators of CINEMA WASTELAND, have put together several of these shows, but, I believe, that, THIS YEAR'S CONVENTION will exceed everyone's' expectations! Compound that with the continued filming of GHASTLEE And FRIENDS soon-to-be-completed, and, released: JOE NOSFERATU, HOMELESS VAMPIRE (who is another character to my constantly growing clan) and, you have an event worth many times over what you'd pay for a normal convention! My NEW Show, BARON Von WOLFSTEIN And FRIENDS, will be taped around the last week of October (TIMOTHY'S Birthday) to air as close to ALL HALLOW'S E'EN as possible. I'm getting a real work-out with other HORROR HOSTS, as well as some of their Side-Kicks: THE MORTICIAN, perhaps northern-Ohio's 'latest' HORROR HOST (in more ways than one!) requested my assistance in the creation of his face... so, a couple of broken beer bottles later...! No, nothing quite so drastic as that, really, since he does wish to do the Clark Kent/Superman switcheroo, to have some semblance of a private life... instead, we went with something really subtle; wait until you see it! His Show is GREAT!!! DR. HORRIFIC (one of Dayton's new breed of HORROR HOSTS) and I have done some vid shoots, and, developed the premise which will allow his character to freely mutate as scripting needs direct. I've already sketched a few images of his tranmogrificable image. Aside from the impending Nuptials at CINEMA WASTELAND, we dive immediately into the movie classic, with EXTRA CHEESE: THE ABOMINABLE SNOWMAN! And, being a bunch of Abominable Showmen, GHASTLEE, and, I, along with other Hosting Greats; SUSPIRA, PROF.GRIFFIN, etc.... will be doing an old-time SPOOK SHOW to accompany this revered Cinematic Wonder! To add to the sheer amazement of our Audience, we will be providing, ABSOLUTELY FREE, (unless we decide to pick your pockets while the movie distracts you) a Visit from one of the latest Members of The GHASTLEE-Von WOLFSTEIN Unstable Stable of Characters... none other than the ABOMINABLE SNOWMAN Himself (unless he melts under the heat of the Theatre's Klieg Lights.) GRIMSBURGER, aka, MR. RICH, is purportedly involved in these shenanigans, but, seeing is believing! I am, also, exhibiting Paintings, Masks, and HORROR HOST/MONSTER Plates, which I've created, for sale at the Conventions, and, through various Websites... including the one for BARON Von WOLFSTEIN & FRIENDS that E-GOR and I will be producing in the near future. The 10 surviving episodes of my old show shall be available shortly on VHS and DVD, Thanks again, to my esteemed Brother, GHASTLEE! A compilation of the new segments can't be far behind. Well, I hope that I've answered all of the BURNING questions that you, or, your readers, might FIRE at me... and, if I've QUENCHED your curiosity, you can grant me this favor- DOUSE that TORCH you're holding; WEREWOLF HAIR is extremely Combustible, and, I've noticed that you've been inching closer to me, as our interview progressed...

BARON Von WOLFSTEIN can be reached through: TheHorrorHostUnderground@yahoogroups.com