"Dance till you fall,
Love till you die,
Shut your mouth...
Raise the roof."
Carbon Leaf, Raise the Roof

Despite the fact that I spend (on average) seven or more hours in front of a computer every day I find it hard to post anything to this site. However, I've made a recent discovery: someone in the building where I live has an unsecured wireless network that I can reach with my laptop from our roof deck. Somehow sitting in a lawn chair watching the ferries go by creates a blog-inducing atmosphere.

This post is a race against the clock.. actually its a race against mother nature. I'm sitting in the middle of what's known in Seattle as a 'Sunbreak', but I can see rain coming in across the sound so I've only got another twenty minutes.

There's little new to report. Work is hard, Cara is great, Bill Gates is till rich. We've been to Vegas, seen some great shows (Carbon Leaf, Richard Jeni, Jim Gafogan), and ate a lot of good meals.

Most interesting recent event was yesterday afternoon when I went Curling with my dev team. Curling is an olympic sport that's a bit like shuffleboard on ice. Way fun. I highly recommend it.

My evenings are starting to get eaten up by ECS rehersals again. Our show is going to be the first two weeks in June so if anyone thinks they might be in Seattle during that time let me know and I'll happily reserve you some tickets.

Here's comes the rain.

"High coefficient of kinship"
Best Euphamism Ever

Happy New Year! I have nothing to say. I'm coming off a two-week vacation during which I saw a lot of important loved ones and the net net is that my givashit is just about completely fixed.

Rang in the New Year with Cara at the Pier 66 Bash with the Dudley Manlove Quartet. Have some new resolutions including cooking once a week and being better at staying in touch with people. Decided that 2004 has kept The Chain going and am happy about the year to come.

"Yeah, I got my flannel dirty and I'm gonna whine about it."
My friend Aaron's treatise on the Grunge scene

There's a tool outside my window.

I'm working from home this morning because I've got my first doctor's visit in seven years at 10:00am. I'm a little nervous about it. Not for any good reason: I'm in good health, but who knows what she'll tell me. What if I've come down with something like Irritable Redhead Syndrome or Cranial-Rectal Inversion? Or what if its something that they've never seen before like Scott-Pox?

Anyway, I'm sitting here coding when I notice this guy sitting on a balcony across the alley. He's about my age, and he's just sitting there in the 30-something degree cold smoking and playing his guitar. He's one of those guys I used to see all over my college campus playing Creed-sounding crap on his guitar in a whiny voice that implies he really believes one of two rediculous things. Either 1) he believes the lyrics he's singing *SHUDDER* or 2) he believes that this is a good way to meet girls. Yeah, good luck with that buddy.

I'm tempted to get my pellet gun out of storage.

"Four Votes?!?"
Me

Four votes? FOUR VOTES!!! Four votes...

...is the margin on Washing State Govenetorial(sp?) race as of 11/17/2004 5:14:00 PM. Now I know we're all still spinning after the mind-blowing horror that was the presidential race, but this is Washington for Pete's sake! I thought we liberal Seattlites easily outnumbered the rural conservatives here.

I guess I was wrong.

Or perhaps there are a bunch of weird F***ers who only voted in the presidential race and not for the govenor of their own state. I hate those people.

I'm also not to crazy about people who voted for the Libertarian candidate, Ruth Bennett. Yes, I know she's a progressive Lesbian with a big emphasis on civil liberties, but c'mon people. If voting you conscience get's a fundamentalist tool like Dino Rossi (who supports the idea of banning gay marriages) into the position of govenor then you've just screwed yourself good and proper, haven't you?

Grrr...

"...Its easier than thinking"
Traditional

I'm tempted to post something whiny in the wake of last nights election. However, I guess what I really should do it to spend some time figuring out why the majority of Americans wanted to re-elect George W. Bush.

So while I'm doing that you should enjoy this little nugget that's been kicking around the internet

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God's word is eternal and unchanging

Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. On her radio show recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an Abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance.

The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, penned by a US resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as thought provoking.


Dear Dr. Laura,
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination... End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements

1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighbouring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how Do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.

4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odour for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbours. They claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

5. I have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to Kill him myself?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?

7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have A defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does My vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes Me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two Different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev.24:10-16.) Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Mike Beale

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Q: What do you call 25 overpaid professionals watching the World Series?
A: The New York Yankees

Thus ends the curse of the Bambino.

I don't really have any particular love for the BoSox, but I was pulling for my grandfather's sake. The last time the Sox won the Series was in 1918, and he was born in 1919. That makes him older than the pope.

I called him after game two just to chat and he told me a little story. In 1946 he graduated Dental school, but he and two other guys in his graduating class are missing from the class picture because they went into Boston to watch the Sox lose the series to St. Louis. (Side note: their tickets cost $0.50).

And so 58 years later he gets the ending he was hoping for. :-)

What else is new... well here's a conversation I had yesterday that came out of no where: I was in one of my teammates offices helping her debug something when...

Her:Would you like a Duck Heart?
Me:A What?
Her:A Duck Heart.
(Holds up a small individually wrapped something)
Me:Is that like some kind of candy with a funny name?
Her:No its a duck heart.
Me:What does it taste like?
Her:Meat.
Me:Oh... is it tough?
Her:No, but its chewey.
Me:Well... OK.

So in the interest of being groovy (and because I like to think I'll try anything within reason once) I ate a duck heart. It was like... have you ever bitten into a superball? One of those little rubber bouncy balls? It was a texture like that... only much saltier.

All in all I equate it to the time I tried chicken feet: it wasn't that bad, but it certainly wasn't that good. So now that I've tried one I'll be able to politely decline the next one that's offered to me without feeling like an uncultured fool.

President Scroob: "Do something."
Helmet: "Do something!"
Sanders: "DO SOMETHING!"
Spaceballs

Wow, just under a month. Well done there.

Plenty has happened, and quite a bit of it merits telling, but I've developed a pretty accute case of Lazy Bastard Syndrome (LBS) and I've been learning to cope.

The all-city scavenger hunt that culmiated in a cake-eating contest probably deserves a post, but not today. Although I can tell you that we got to dog-sit Dan Savage's (of Savage Love) little gay dog. We only know its gay because he told us.

For now I'll just (briefly) mention that I had the most wonderful weekend. Cara and I did a historic re-enactment of the famous Gwen, Heather, and Scott Orcas Island trip. The two biggest differences were that we opted to stay in a beautifully furnished little cabin instead of a weird hippy dome tent and we didn't bother will all that tedious outdoorsy stuff. Nope a whole weekend of straigh slackin' (Hey, living with LBS ain't easy)