<html> <!--Generated by Angelfire: L00S00--> <head> <title>Memoriable Moments (Quotes)</title> </head> <body bgcolor="#ffffff" text="#000000" link="#0000ff" alink="#800080" vlink="#4682b4"> <basefont size="3"> <!--Header--> <h1 align="center">Memoriable Moments (Quotes)</h1> <!--EndHeader--> <!--Freetext--><P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: I'm not completely emotionally retarded. I have feelings. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Kyle</FONT>: What do you suppose alien crystals are going for on EBay? <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: So, do you get hungry just like the rest of us? <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Kyle</FONT>: You look really great when you're pissed. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Tess</FONT>: Yeah, right. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Kyle</FONT>: No, I'm serious. I feel, like, all this energy coming from you right now. In order to trim the lamp of wisdom, we must attend to our bodily needs. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Tess</FONT>: Let me tell you something, Buddha-boy... I got a lamp that needs some serious trimming. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: Hello? I'm singing on Saturday at the new performance space next to the museum! <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: Yeah. But I've heard you sing before. What's the big deal? <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: We've both been kind of busy. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: [looking at her chest] Yeah, I can see that. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Alex</FONT>: I was wondering - do aliens enjoy the cinema? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: Alex... <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Alex</FONT>: Yeah, right. Sorry. The 'A' word. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: Are you afraid? I mean to let someone in; to let someone see who you really are? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Yeah, of course I am. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO"></FONT>Isabel: Well, multiply that by about a million. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: This is the second time you've dragged me into some cheap motel. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: Well, don't spread it around; you'll ruin my reputation. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: I want to get the hell out of here. This place is psychologically damaging. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: "This place could hold the answers to everything. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: Yeah, I'm sure it's a real mecca for factual information <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: The perfect Liz Parker lying to her mother? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Yeah, well, at least my parents know what species I am. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Announcer</FONT>: What's running through your mind right now? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Yeah, nothing I can say on live radio. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: Not if you were the last alien on Earth. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: Well I'm not from around here. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Where you from? [Max points up with his index finger] <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Up north? [Max points higher] <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: You're not an, an alien, I mean. Are you? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: Well I prefer the term not of this earth. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: [pointing to the bed] I don't suppose we could share? <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: [about Maria] It feels so wrong, but it feels so good. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">DJ</FONT>: Well, hey, hold on there, dream girl. You're not gonna get off so easy. I mean, look at these guys. You got 'em hanging on by a string, and I think you owe it to them, and the KROZ listeners, to make a choice here and now. Will it be Doug, the dream man we chose for you...the ex-boyfriend, Lyle... <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">DJ</FONT>: Or Max, who kidnapped you, and vandalized your home? What do you have to say for yourselves, men? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Doug</FONT>: I thought she just wanted a normal date. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Kyle</FONT>: [Drunk] Hey, I'm just happy to be nominated...and I think I'm gonna puke. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Hi. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Kyle</FONT>: Well, you here for a reason, or you just rushed right over 'cause you sensed I might be experiencing some actual joy? <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Tess</FONT>: Kind of uptight about nudity, aren't you, for a guy who reads Jugs? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Kyle</FONT>: Give me that! <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Tess</FONT>: Oh...the post-its? Nice touch. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: Oh, well, I certainly don't want to hear a long story unless there's a Kennedy involved. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Kyle</FONT>: My strength fails. My vitality exhausted. I cannot find the bull. I only hear the locusts chirring through the night. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Nesedo</FONT>: Sheriff Valenti, welcome to the ever-burgeoning "I know an alien" club. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: Yes, yes. You're trying to figure out how to be a leader. All right. Here's a little insight. JFK. He's not so great. Cheated on his wife with tramps. Ohhhh...now there's something you and Jack have in common. You're both involved with tramps. How is Tess, by the way? <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Alex</FONT>: Doesn't Buddhism disapprove of gambling? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Kyle</FONT>: Actually Buddha himself first coined the phrase "know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away and know when to run" <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Alex</FONT>: And yours is obviously a deep and abiding spiritual faith. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: Whoever sent us down here was smart, you know? Because they sent us together, and as long as we stick together, we're gonna make it. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: The guy with the gun was kind of like a, like a muscular Beavis. And...the other one was like a, like a beefy Butthead. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: [voice] It's September 24th, I'm Liz Parker and five days ago I died. But then the really amazing thing happened. I came to life. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Alex</FONT>: Isabel Evans and Alex Charles Whitman out on a date? That's like, miraculous, you know, this is-this is the biggest moment of Alex Charles Whitman's life... <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Listen, why don't you just take some deep breaths, okay? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Alex</FONT>: It's just- it's amazing, you know, I-it's totally amazing, it's-it's too amazing- oh, God! It's a joke, isn't it? It's a practical joke. You two are in on it, you bastards... <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Alex...Alex, Alex, ummm, your paranoid schizophrenia, it's kicking in. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Alex</FONT>: Right. I'm gonna go to the bathroom and go have a little talk with myself. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: This can never be normal, Max. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: What's so great about normal? <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: The day you saved my life, your life just ended. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: No, that's the day my life began. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Tess</FONT>: "Buddhism for Beginners" is also under your bed. How do you think the Buddha would feel about being sandwiched between Hustler and Busty Biker Babes? <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Courtney</FONT>: Chill out, NYPD blue. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Alex</FONT>: Chill out? Chill out? I spent $150 to rent this costume. And do you have any idea how it feels to walk around all day with a thong up your ass? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Courtney</FONT>: Yes! <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Future Max</FONT>: 3...2...1. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Well? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Future Max</FONT>: I said approximately. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: Weather I die today or fifty years from now, my destiny is the same. It's you <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: [writing in journal] We try to live responsible logical lives, but we can't tell our hearts what to feel. Sometimes our hearts lead us to places we never thought we wanted to go, and sometimes our hearts can be the sweetest gentlest things we have. Sometimes our hearts can make us feel miserable anger, excited and confused all at once. But at least my heart is open, and I'm writing again. I'm feeling. I'm breathing. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: I'm not an actor. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Agent</FONT>: What, and Keanu Reeves is? All you need is exposure. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: That's the last thing I need. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: At least I've been to L.A. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: I'm not sure Disneyland counts as L.A. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Since I told her that you broke my heart -- without any of the alien details, of course -- she thinks that we should just take things slow. Just dinner, then straight home, no plans for future dates. No making out. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: So I suppose skinny dipping would be against the rules, too. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: [To herself as she pulls up in the car] Why can't these aliens ever get in trouble somewhere decent? Like Graceland or Tahoe or New Orleans. No, Utah. Mormons and mountains. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: I don't know if I could live with myself if anything ever happened to you. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Max, you're an alien king. What could ever happen to me? <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: It's an aqua bra. You know, all the fun of implants without the invasive surgery part. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: It's not that cold. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: You're not wearing an ice bra. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: How long is this going to last, us waiting out here like this? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: Why? You got a date? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: Maybe. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: You know, I'm the one that should be complaining stuck out here with you two. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Maybe you could stay for dinner. You know, Blue Moon burger, Saturn rings and a Mercury milkshake for $3.99. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: Sounds tempting. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: Clear as a bell, no mistake, that's right. Miss Topolsky, all American guidance counselor and big, fat liar. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: Never trust a blonde. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: Stick a fork in us, Maxwell, we're done. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: Liz told him we were into drugs, just to get him to stop asking questions. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: Great. That will be a lot easier to explain to Mom and Dad. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: If it isn't Prince Charming and Quasimodo. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Max likes cherry cola. What does Michael like? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: Cherry cola with arsenic? <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: You broke up? Why didn't you tell me? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: I don't know if we did or we didn't. It's kind of confusing. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Cherry cola on the house <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: Yours is $1.25 <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: "I guess it's not so confusing anymore. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Alex</FONT>: Why on earth, excuse the phrase, why would you be sent here to begin with? What purpose could you possibly serve? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: To wipe out the world one annoying teenager at a time? <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: We're just as human as you are, Alex. Only we can manipulate the molecular structure of things. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Alex</FONT>: What? <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: How is it possible I could be the happiest I've ever been in my entire life and now the saddest, all at one time? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: I think that's what being in love is. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: [From under Alien head] Save me....I'm a human trapped in an alien body. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: You realize we've just lost our last shred of dignity. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Customer</FONT>: I am Zenaplox from the planet Zetagon. I come to destroy humanity and return to my home planet. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: Well, then, it's really great that you're starting out with a nice, hearty breakfast. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: Michael, I have to talk to you about something....personal <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: Nothing's too personal. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: How did you deal with Maria? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: Too personal. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: You're the sheriff...you're supposed to protect me. You want me? Well, here I am! <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Valenti</FONT>: Son.... <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: Would you treat your son this way?" <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: Come on. Wiggle your nose, blink your eyes. Do your Samantha/Jeannie/alien thing. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: I can't. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: Why not? If there was ever a time to have a secret power, this is it. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Liz</FONT>: We thought you were in trouble. I guess we were wrong. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: No, no. You don't think, I mean that is like so unreal. Come on, [kicking Michael] <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: would you tell them? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: Come on honey. We don't have to lie. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: I believe you. The day Michael calls anyone honey, it's all over. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Maria</FONT>: You kidnap me and blow up my car and you expect me to spend the night with you in here? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: Not exactly my fantasy evening either. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: [to Liz] Your favorite ice cream flavor is vanilla?! <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: You are so full of it. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: I just call it like I see it. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: You can't compare The Matrix to Crouching Tiger! <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: Crapping Tiger is a chick flick with kung-fu. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: First of all, Crappi... Crouching Tiger is actually about something. Love. Honor. Trust. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: Matrix is about something. Illusion, reality, gunfire. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Max</FONT>: You simply can't prefer Keanu Reeves to Michelle Yeoh. You can't........I won't let you..... <HR> [Michael is fixing up a bumper (Maria's christmas gift.) Isabel comes in with her arms full of presents] <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: It's a bumper. For a Jetta. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: Hmmm. How did what I said yesterday result in this? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: It meets all your criteria. It's personal, because I personally know what a bug she has up her ass about how much we screwed up her car. It's thoughtful, because I had to go to the junkyard and get it, and it's something she would never get herself for the obvious reason that her bumper's been hanging from a string for the past half-year. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: Ok, Michael. This is what I'm gonna do. I am going to take the Christmas dog show off my calendar and take you shopping and rectify this situation. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: No. I'm not gonna get obsessed over this present. This is fine. I'm not gonna make everyone else around me miserable. <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Isabel</FONT>: What are you saying? That I get obsessed and make everyone around me miserable? <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: [quickly] I didn't say that. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: [to Max] You have one of the top three pickup lines in history with "it's gunna help me find my home planet" <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: Look, Laurie, I know a lot of people think you're pretty crazy. But the truth is, knowing everything you've been through, you seem pretty normal to me. I just want you to know that whatever you are to me-- a sister, a cousin, whatever-- you're the only family I've ever known, and I just found you. I don't... I don't want to let you go. I know you're scared to death of me, but... if you could find some way to trust me... I mean, I got all kinds of faults. And this one over here, you know [gestures to Maria] <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">Michael</FONT>: she can list them off for you if you want later on, but... the one thing I am is loyal. I will not turn my back on you. That's all I got to say. I don't know. <HR> <P><FONT COLOR="#FFOOOO">AMY</FONT>: Do you think I wasn't seventeen once? Do you think I didn't do crazy, stupid things with a really bad boy when I was your age? <!--EndFreetext--> <p> <!--Links--> <font size="5"></font> <p> <a href="http://www.angelfire.com/in2/JasonBehr">Back to 'All About Jason Behr' main page</a><br> <p> <!--EndLinks--> <!--Counter--> <center><img src="/cgi-bin/Count.cgi"></center> <p> <!--EndCounter--> <!--Email--> <center>Email: <a href="mailto:fiberchic@angelfire.com"> fiberchic@angelfire.com</a></center> <!--EndEmail--> </body> </html>