The Ride - Back On The Bus
The young woman sits, nervous and uncomfortable
in her seat on the bus
watching the scenery drift by.
The names of the towns flash by
giving her a feeling of disconnectedness.
Towns with names like Debeque and Rifle,
Silt, New Castle, Glenwood Springs.
All unfamiliar, causing a feeling of
uneasiness and intense aloneness.
Her thoughts drift off to her friend in California,
and a tear slips from beneath her
half closed eyelid and slides,
unnoticed, down her cheek.
She was completely floored when she went to the
Western Union office and
picked up the money her friend had wired to her.
She had thought that it would be enough for bus fare
and maybe a few meals,
but the amount printed on the check
had simply astounded her.
Five thousand dollars!!!!!
To get her to Denver and get her
into an apartment, buy a used car,
have her name changed...
and no mention of repayment.
Well, she would repay her...
somehow, someday, it would happen.
The message that was with it had brought her
to tears and beyond, telling her of a person
who had a small business in Denver who
owed a favor, and that favor was now being collected
in the form of employment for her, real employment,
not selling burgers and fries or waiting tables.
She was to be hired on a trial basis
repairing computers!!!
She had hardly ever touched a computer before!
She felt like she was in the middle of a dream,
a good dream for a change,
and feared that she would wake up any moment now,
under the bridge back in Grand Junction,
shivering and cold.
She watches as the canyon gives way to a mountain valley,
then more small towns;
Gypsum, Dotsero, Eagle, Edwards,
Avon (she mentally envisions a town full of
perfume peddlers and a ghost of a smile touches her lips)
Questions race through her mind
like stampeding elephants,
one after another:
What if the job didn't work out?
What if (he) followed her?
What if after what if after what if.
She closes her eyes and rests her head against the window.
What if it does work out?
What if (he) never finds her?
What if she has her child and they have a happy life?
What if she never has to worry about
bearing the brunt of another man's anger
for the rest of her life?
So many what if's and so few answers.
The bus passes signs for Vail, then begins to climb steeply
The engine labors going up the pass.
Well, time would tell and now she actually felt
that she would have time.
Time to heal, time to learn how to be
(happy?)
on her own.
Time to do so many things she wanted to do.
Time to raise her child and teach her
about the perils of life, and the hardness of the world, yes,
But also to teach her about joy, understanding, hope.
She watches as the bus tops the pass and begins to descend.
The scenery is breathtaking, so white and stark
against the blue of the sky.
She hadn't wanted to have to lean on her friend
(her only friend)
but her body wouldn't cooperate and raising money the old way
had been impossible.
She had tried twice, both times had been
excruciatingly painful to her back and her ribs.
The men had commented on the huge bruise on her side
but it really didn't seem to matter too much
for what they were there for.
The bus passes Frisco and Breckenridge,
Dillon and keystone,
and the road begins to climb again.
The first thing she had done
after receiving her friend's money
was to go to St. Mary's hospital.
They were really nice there,
if you can consider doctors and nurses as 'nice'
She made up some lame excuse for the bruises,
but couldn't think of anything to
explain away her missing toe.
Those things really weren't important anyway.
What was important was the child.
Was it still there?
Would there be problems?
Everything had looked fine to the doctor,
and she was given a prescription
for the pain, and a booklet
on eating and exercising
for a healthy pregnancy.
The bus creeps up the mountain side
and passes into a tunnel, the longest tunnel she has ever seen,
and eventually it emerges from the other side.
Descends into Georgetown, Silver Plume,
passes Idaho Springs and Evergreen,
tops the rise at Genesee,
and she gets her first view of her new home,
spread out on the plains below, lights bright in the growing darkness.
It looks vast, endless miles of city stretching to the horizon
and instead of causing feelings of fear,
it brings her a sense of peace, belonging.
Here she will start again, fresh, new, alive,
and full of hope.
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