Spiritual Hunger

There are countless ways given us, to please God. Probably as many ways, as there are people. And He places a yearning in the hearts of His own, to draw near to Him.

Just as our physical hunger increases, the nearer we come to the kitchen as the Thanksgiving meal is prepared; so does our spiritual hunger grow keener, the closer we draw to God. Also, just as the cook desires for her family to enjoy the meal she prepares; so does our Heavenly Father desire for His children to yearn to move closer to Him, and enjoy partaking of His blessings.

Oh, how I wish for my life to be a garden of spices and pleasant fruits, for Christ. I wish to be a pleasure to His heart. I wish to put a joy in His heart. Dare I even hope for such a thing?

* Awake, O north wind; and come, thou south; blow upon my garden, that the spices thereof may flow out. Let my beloved come into his garden, and eat his pleasant fruits. Song of Solomon 4:16

The more I discover of my Heavenly Father's approval, and closeness, the more I crave.

* As the deer pants for streams of water, so pants my soul after you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. Psalm 42:1-2

I hunger to please my Heavenly Father. My deepest spiritual desire has always been to hear Him say, when I get to Heaven, "well done, thou good and faithful servant". So many times I have failed miserably, but He forgives. Praise God, He forgives! And I am blessed with the merciful opportunity to again attempt to please Him.

Being human, we can not please Him all the time. If we could, we would be perfect, and we cannot achieve that until Heaven.

Yet the desire is strong, and the more His pleasure is felt by the heart, the hungrier His people become, to please Him again. To know the glory of spiritual light. To feel the beauty of spiritual wind, wafting His presence ever around. To be filled with the holiness of His love.

* Blessed are you that hunger now, for you shall be filled. Luke 6:21

Is there anything in life so rewarding, as bringing a smile to another's face? As causing joy to brighten another's heart?

God calls His own to many vocations; from very small humble ones like my own, to vast and great ones. But all of the vocations He calls His own to, are of equal value in His eyes.

He called me to the mission of motherhood from the age of nine, by infusing me with the overwhelming desire to become a mother. When I became a mother, it was first to children with disabilities, before He gave me a child by birth. Clearly, He showed me His purpose, by causing me to wait through those years of longing for a baby. If it weren't for those empty years, I might not have found His mission by going searching for a motherless child to become my own through adoption.

Many times I have been deeply moved by the realization that God loved me enough to create me with a particular desire to nurture, and then gave me His own dear children to love. What a gift, to be given a holy vocation by God Himself! What a gift to do this, one of the most lowly of jobs; cleaning, feeding, nursing, dressing, washing clothes for the helpless. For it is not lowly to God.

How I admire every nurse's aide, who while at their small and repetitive chores, finds care in their hearts for the people. Who gives a smile and a tender touch to those who are helpless. That is a gift to Christ. A pleasure to God's heart.

I first took care of a helpless child, when I was twelve years old. Ever since, I have experienced the strong belief that Christ's love and approval comes to those who love and care for those, His unique little ones.

Over thirty years ago, when my most disabled child only had mild mental retardation, I read a story which profoundly affected my life. It was written by the mother of an eight year old girl named Becky, who could not sit up, crawl, talk or play. This child spent her days lying on her living room floor. This was before public schools provided education for helpless children. Before insurance programs supplied wheelchairs to immobile children. This was still during the decades when disabled children were usually put into institutions rather than being kept at home, due to intense pressure from doctors and society.

This mother's story was filled with joy, because the little girl had learned to roll over, as the sunshine moved slowly across the floor, in order to stay in the warm light! It was the first thing this mother had ever seen her child learn to do.

At the time, I was amazed, wondering how anyone could think this was an accomplishment! Wondering how any child could be that low in functioning. Oh, how much I had yet to learn! But that story stayed with me, and I never forgot it. My heart yearned toward children who were more and more helpless, as the years went by.

God was leading me. Today, while I love and care for my helpless children, I know the Lord's pleasure like no other time.

All of the time I spend with them, is special to Christ Jesus. It was He who spoke of those who give the least of His so much as a glass of water, as being blessed. My oldest helpless child is now nearly forty. Yet she is the same as she was as a child. To me, my children are children, though aging, and will always be. After all, I myself, am still an infant in God's eyes; considering that my earthly years are nothing, compared to eternity, which He has planned for me. He feels tender compassion for me. It is not difficult to feel tender compassion for those who are helpless, on this earth.

When the sun is out, and all three of my helpless ones are on the deck, just out the door from me as I write, wheelchairs locked in place, and happy faces raised to the mountain breeze, I feel blessed.

When evening comes, and I tuck these three into bed, in clean clothing, turn on music and soft lights, and sing "Jesus Tender Shepherd" to them, I feel blessed.

When we are all by the window, looking at the snow falling, falling, ever gentle, ever softly white, four months out of the year, I feel blessed.

God has given me this calling, from the mercy and grace of His heart. It is so little to do for Him, and yet He gives me such spiritual joy through it.

Certainly, I am not always successful in pleasing my Heavenly Father, but He places the spiritual hunger in my soul, and shows me ways for it to be filled. There are so many callings in this world. I have only my own small one. But I am blessed.

2005 Rosemary Gwaltney