Goodbye to a brown-eyed boy
Today I've become utterly uninspired,
As the tide fate has once again conspired
The moment I saw you I melted inside,
But all that is gone now as part of me died.
Eyes once thought beautiful, mesmerizing
Now dull, lifeless as tears stream, crying.
You were never interested in what I said
All the while only wanting to share a bed.
For the moment lost in complete agony,
Trying furtively to erase you from memory.
Denial of the deepest emotion...
I'm drowning in a vast, lonely ocean.
My heart decieved one last time,
I won't give you my two cents, or a dime.
We go on, you pretending to be a friend
But I now know on you I cannot depend.
Was I too pure for your lust?
So now you leave me in the dust.
Are you scared of what I could be?
All the while you wanting to be free.
All the stronger I become realizing this mistake
The whole of me was never yours to take.
I'm not for you, you're not for me
No sense in calling out a final plea.
There's so much more to life than this,
Goodbye brown-eyed boy, never yours again to
kiss.
-katie oster 2003
(yes..a sad "breakup poem"..yeah love hurts and cuts
you..be careful who you love. peace.)
-----------------------------------------
Fade to grey
You sense the end is near
Trying furtively to reach out to those most dear
Seasons changing in the blink of an eye
Fine features now creased with age, you sigh
You imagined walking this path
The enevitable is a cold, calculated math
What we do in life echos in eternity
Pray that goodness in your heart will set you free
Fill this growing emptyness with meaning,
Understand the universe with eyes new seeing
The fog lifts and you know the truth
Feel your heart beating as strong as in youth
Why do you fade now, turn to grey?
As if hanging on by a thread each passing day
As these days grow shorter in your mind
Return to the memories you never left behind
When you cross over to this other place,
In our lives you will have left more than a trace
Children, do not mourne this passing
Your flushed, wet cheeks I long to be caressing
You see, we will be together again
Now only a question of when
Then when you are in perfect bliss,
Never again will you miss
My child, upon cold stones I must now lay,
My time has come to fade to grey
-Katie Oster 2003
(in memory of my grandma)
-----------------------------------------
Something new, something more
Push me away,
Life blurs as if in a haze,
Old wounds are open
This shaky friendship broken.
Crawl away inside of myself,
But its not me that needs the help.
Why do I waste my breath on you?
When nothing that you say is true.
All the while tripping in your wires,
Why is it you I still desire?
Caught in a vicious circle of love and hate
On your list of importance, what would I rate?
Why am I lost on you,
When I need to find something new..
What am I waiting for?
Something true, something more
-Katie Oster 2004
-----------------------------------------
Into the East
I look to the east,
As the sun's rays are first released
Im drawn to you, over sea and over stone
I realize that with you, I am not alone
I imagine turf smoke curling along your bay,
As the children laugh and the ponies play.
I wish to climb your cliffs,
To taste your drink strong and stiff.
To listen to your voice while you speak your language,
To learn of your past and proud heritage
To see life through your eyes,
On a hill of countless greens under the pale blue sky
Oh, to know your awe-inspiring love of freedom,
Hoarded and almost destroyed by a kingdom.
Oh, to fight in the ongoing war of old times
Each evil no greater, no lesser in its crimes.
Constant clashes of the spirit,
Sense the sparks of faith, love, joy near it
Tyranny justified in religious difference,
Brothers so changed by a country's indifference
I wish to share your pain,
To tell you not all is done in vain
I want to feel your scars,
To see your constellations in the stars.
I dream of you in all your mystery,
Enshrouded in ages of history
To sing your music and learn your dance,
To honor ancestors long past
Tonight, again will i dream my dream,
Hoping that one day what I see will be.
-Katie Oster 2004
(I wrote this out of admiration for Ireland, even
though I have never been.)
-----------------------------------------
Petra
You think yourself alone
But a sickness blackens your mind
As life revolves around one so insignificant
But the one has become your universe
Is it worth all this pain?
Your tears, your worries, your anger
You lash out as you completely lose your mind
Fighting them all and yourself.
Slashes on your wrists
You want it all to stop,
Almost going too far this time.
What of tomorrow sweet child,
As thoughts revolve in familiar sequence.
This chain must be broken.
A last hope, then a sudden change-
A blinding light pierces your soul,
A lifetime in a moment.
What do you see?
Yourself in it's most perfect form
Untouched by the parasites of this world
Yourself as you should be.
Free to be
See the truth and walk away
Live to love another day.
-katie oster 2004
-----------------------------------------
Isn't she the most incredible Poet you have ever seen. She is amazing and if I could find a way...I would get her a publisher...so she could put all of her poems...Yes this is just a handful...into a book. I am glad to call her my friend and I hope she can say the same of me.
Her name is Katie Oster, remember it cause one day she is going to be a famous published author of a whole whack of books full of her poetry. At least she will if I can help it. LOL. Cause she deserves it. She is not only a great poet but a great person, too.
Luv Ya Katie.
Back to Widows Index...
