Hi, everyone! Welcome to The Insane Person's Guide to Insanity (or IPGI)! The club is no more, because we never do anything anyway and I wanted to put the club's meager *special* pages on the main page. Now the IPGI is just a collection of incredibly stupidly amusing stuff. Enjoy!

Here's the Funny Quote of the Every-Other-Day for :

"Thanks for thinking of me and my highly developed gag reflex."

Updates

June 21st: Guess what? I have a job! I work with second graders. They are sooooooo cute. Yes, that is my roundabout way of apologizing for the dearth of updates. But that's a perpetual problem, so maybe I shouldn't apologize *smile*. Anyways - I do have some stuff for you all today. The journal has I think three new entries. And (this is an off-site link) you NEED to go to Romenesko's Obscure Store and Reading Room. I love that site! Also, back here on our own page, there's been an update to the funny product instructions page. Coming soon: a mountain of spam.

June 4th: I'm not even going to say it. God, aren't you all shocked I updated? If there is, indeed, anyone out there reading the IPGI anymore? Anyway, if there is: two new things. A new entry in the Journal from my funny amiga Josie and a variety of Spammish lawyer stuff from my other funny amiga Melissa (look for her on the Death Day page). And - I'm NOT changing the funny quote of the day, because it's funny. Thank you.

March 31st: ya, i know - I need to update more. Anyway - here's today's stuff: I found another "animal part in mcdonald's food" story and I have decided to make the IPGI a clearinghouse for this sort of thing :) so send me all your rodent-in-a-burger or chicken-head-in-a-chicken-nuggets-box kind of stories, and enjoy reading about the poor little nine-year-old that got a rat in her Big Mac sandwich. Also, read the funniest headlines of 1999. I've had that one for a while, huh? :)

February 22nd: Yes, I realize it's been forever. I have one new offering: the Death Day Party report page, all about our death day party for Sami (who, by the way, is TOTALLY alive RIGHT NOW *smile*).

January 17th: more new spam: Excuses for Not Coming to Work and Stupid Workers.

January 11th: some new spam: Where to Go on Vacation and Governments and Cows.

January 10th: All right, here's some new stuff today. Some of the Club's old exclusive quotes: volume one and volume two. Also, from the presidential election, a fake Palm Beach County ballot.

January 8th: Yes, I know. It's been a while. Here's my apology: I'm working on a page redesign. It will rock, I promise. Until then, right now I'm linking the club's few pages to this one to tide you over. I'm going to add some more original stuff soon, besides the spam: Sami's having a Death Day party, so I'm sure I can do something fun with that. Until then, bear with me...I swear we'll get creative soon. :)

December 7th: Funny Survey added. Also, from the Washington Post, Chicken McNoggin, Hold the Fries.

November 29th: FINALLY, I am proud to unveil the ipgi image gallery. You'd be surprised how long it took to make *smile*. If you have trouble getting some of the images, try pushing "refresh". They're there, I swear. Why they don't come up all the time is beyond me.

November 13th: Three new journal entries today.

November 10th: One new article: Space Mold. Sorry there haven't been many updates lately...more soon.

October 21st: Some funny political links today...scroll down to the links section.

October 20th: More spam today...I promise I'll add something a little different soon. But these are pretty funny...Things Dogs Have to Remember and Funny Headlines.

October 10th: And that quote ["You wanna know how I got sick? My teacher sneezed on me!"] is from me....I am sick, and my teacher did sneeze on me. Gross. On the update side, the Insanity Club Journal is now available to people on the main page. Go look!

October 9th: I have Napster! Yes, I realize I'm a little late *smile*, but it means I'm online more...which will mean this page gets updated more. Right now, a tiny little update: United Airlines' Mileage Plus Program has a hilariously long list of prefixes and suffixes on its sign-up page. Go look.

October 6th: More new spam - look for it under "Departments".

October 3rd: New spam: Dilbert's Boss Quotes Contest and Job Ads: What They Really Mean.

September 17th: New spam: Fun Things to do at K-Mart. I know this sounds an awful lot like "Fun at Target", but they have different things on the lists.

September 3rd: More spam: How to Annoy Your Co-Workers, and Volume 3 of the "I Was Thinking..." series. Also, we now have a Magic 8 Ball! It's in the menu frame.

August 31st: New spam: Computer Virus.

August 25th: I just finished adding a brand new section to the IPGI: games! Two are kindly provided by Angelfire, and one (Snowcraft) is imported from the links section and will open in a new window. Links are in the menu frame - Enjoy!

August 24th: Some new Spam: Fun Things to Do in an Elevator. Also a couple of new links and some old ones that have been re-posted.

August 18th: More Spam: Instructions from Consumer Goods and Fun Things to Do at Yard & Garage Sales.

August 4th: More new Spam! Letters to God, I Was Thinking..., Paybacks are Sweet, and The Question Is...

June 10th: Two new pages: Answering Machine Messages and another volume of classic funny quotes. Also, check out the recommend-it button in the Menu frame.

June 9th: IPGI members, check your site. There's something new and reeeeeeeeally funny in the journal.

Links

Should Bush get a haircut? And we can't leave Al out...should he grow a beard?

United Airlines' Mileage Plus page has a huge list of prefixes and suffixes (Are you a baroness? A swami? At United Airlines, you can be...)

Find a Grave! You can search for celebrities, and also real people. I think the funniest thing about this site is that it isn't supposed to be funny.

Check out this site and find out how to keep an idiot busy.

The Darwin Awards gives people awards for killing themselves through stupidity. My favorite is the dude who superglues himself to a zoo animal.

Potentially the single most annoying site online

MadBlast.com has some cool stick figure videos.

The Simulator - pretend you're working!