DICKS  

    I believe dicks are an instrument of destruction.  They point men in the wrong direction, and there allure promotes the bad decisions women make.   Being called a dick though is a compliment.  You are strong, and hard.   Always ready to rise to the occasion, even when it is unexpected.     You can accomplish anything if you are a dick about it.  But what if your name is Richard.  You are a dick but not the same kind.  Maybe you just have a big head like a dick, so that you think you are a dick.  You are not though.   If you are into anal sex you can have a dirty dick.  Richard Nixon was a dirty dick.  Speaking of Nixon has anyone seen Dick.  They have Dick at your local video store, and I would check it out.  I saw Dick and liked it.  You should spend time alone with your dick.  Gay men spend to much time with dicks.  If a man is named Richard Willy can he be a double dick.  Most lesbians are known to own double dicks.  So God bless my willy, and all the trouble it brings.  Let the bad decisions, and fat chicks who tainted me be forgotten.

FATASS  

     Have you heard about the guy who will live for a year using the internet as his only information outlet.  He is going to order his food, pay his bills and who knows what else he is going to do.  I guess he is even going to shoot for the stars, and do the cybersex thing.  How exciting is that going to be.   The only thing he is really proving is that you can even be lazier in the next millenium.  I think he has goodyear as a corporate sponsor stamped on his is ass.   They gave him a special pair of steel belted trousers.  That is the only way you can sit on your ass all day, without geting all the welts, and sores.  Come on now what have we lost over the years.  Maybe a little self-reliance.  Can you go a single day without seeing the fattest person you have ever seen, only to be dumbfounded to see someone larger the next day.    I waited for an hour to get on a roller coaster at a six flags once.  The large woman in front of me waited as long as me if not more.  When it was finnially this woman's turn to get on the ride she found out she couldn't.  Her ass was just to big.  Do they need to put up signs that say you must be this tall, and not this wide to get on this ride.  Look at the kids today because they are well on the road to obecity.  They have their game boys strapped around their neck, and pokemon paraphaninalia hanging all over them.  Gotta catch them all.  Yeah kid 200lbs, and a heart attack at age 12.