*~*Helpful Hints*~*
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*~*STRICTLY HUMOR*~*
*NSYNC was in Detroit last night, and while heading out of town, they were forced to listen to the crappy radio stations. After hearing the song, "Popular" by Nada Surf, the guys became introspective, examining their own popularity. After a few games on the Play Station, JC said, "Shoot stinkin'! Girls faint at our feet, new wannabe boy bands sprout up every day. We're popular!" "Yeah!" Joey added. "And we get free ice cream at Micky D's. Surely we can advise others on popularity."
So they called me up and gave me some very, er, helpful advice on how anyone can be as cool as they are.
*~*Justin's Helpful Hints *~*
* If at first your standard rims on your Mercedes aren't shiny enough, get huge, flashy ones.
* Baby blue is a manly color. All guys should try it out.
* When you want to impress basketball players, remember to use words such as "Yo," "Diss," "Playa," "Phat," and "Dat."
* If you're bored with your natural hair color, let me suggest yellow.
* Deciding on a college? North Carolina is the bomb, baby!
*~*Chris's Helpful Hints *~*
* It's okay to have a best friend 10 years younger than you. In fact, it's totally awesome!
* Looking for a fashion forward look? FUBU jerseys come in a wide variety of colors and complement any body type.
* Black and white are classic colors. That's why my hair is such a statement of simplicity.
* Crack jokes at others' expenses. They'll love ya!
* Overalls, overalls, overalls. What more can I say?
*~*Joey's Helpful Hints *~*
* Pick-up lines are a guy's best friend. Some of my favorites include:
"Baby, I'm no Fred Flinstone, but I can make your Bedrock!"
"I’d marry your cat just to get in the family."
"Is your name Pepsi? 'Cause I've gotta have it!"
"Do you work for UPS? I could've sworn you were checking out my package." "I like your butt. Can I wear it as a hat?"
* Be sure to get a ruby and diamond necklace of the Superman "S." Chicks dig it.
* Always repeat what you say always. That way, people can understand what you are saying when you are talking.
* I know the best pick-up lines. Try these:
"My name isn't Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime."
"If you were a booger, I'd pick you first."
"Hi. My name is Milk. I'll do your body good."
"Should I call you in the morning or nudge you?"
*~*Lance's Helpful Hints*~*
* Make sure when you apply foundation to blend upward for a more natural look.
* There is nothing in the world more important than tweezers.
* Don't use Joey's pick-up lines. I tried one, and ended up with Danielle Fishel.
* If you're going to be in a boy band, rhythm is imperative.
* If you're in need of extra cash, never ever dress like a Dalmatian and sing Barneyesque songs at birthday parties. It's rather difficult to live down.
*~*JC's Helpful Hints *~*
* Sleep. Sleep a lot. I recommend at least 13 hours a day for a truly rested feeling.
* Perfection is the key to success. That's why you msut nit-pick mistakes made by others.
* If you are ever on MTV's Total Request Live, and a gay teenaged boy named Eddie asks what your fantasy is, pretend you are a deaf-mute and ignore the question. Or perhaps pass the question to Joey. He's full of things to say on the subject.
* Remember, even if you are articulate and charming, when around basketball players, using the phrase, "We're gonna school all o' dem, yo!" is, in fact, completely appropriate.