*~*Joey Fatone*~*
*~*Joey Fatone*~*
Full Name: Joseph Anthony Fatone, Jr.
Birthdate: January 28, 1977
Birthplace: Brooklyn, New York
Height: Somewhere around 6 ft., methinks (that's 1.83 m.)
Current Residence: Orlando, Florida
Family: Mother Phyllis, father Joe; sister Janine and brother Steven
Nicknames: Flirt, Phat-One, Party Animal
Hobbies: Skating, flirting, karate, jet skiing, dancing, collecting Superman items, clubbing
Favorites:
-T.V. Show:
-Movie: Billy Madison
-Actor and Actress: Robert DeNiro, Jodie Foster, and Demi Moore (think big rack)
-Author: William Shakespeare
-Food: Anything Italian, especially lasagna. He says that nothing could ever top his mom's cooking. (Aww, you mama's boy...)
-Drink: Pepsi
-Color: Purple (Ain't that kinda feminine?)
-Word: "Burrtt!" which he says really loud for no reason
Dislikes: Fake people
Religion: Catholic
What does he drive: An Acura SLX
What's underneath those pants of his (besides the obvious...): Fruit of the Loom undies
Greatest Musical Influence: His father Joe, who was in a '50's style doo-wop group called the Orions.
Wildest... ahem, fantasy: A big ol' pool of Jell-O. He probably buys the jiggly stuff wholesale when the ladies come over to visit.
Favorite cheesy pick-up line: "Do you have a quarter? 'Cause I gotta go call my mom and tell her I just met the girl of my dreams." Dammit Joey, just use that huge roll of quarters you always have in that front pocket of yours. You ain't foolin' us with that one anymore.
What he looks for in a woman: "A fun girl with a great personality who enjoys company, honest, can take a joke and likes going to the movies. I like girls who aren't afraid to speak their mind. I don't really have a type; I like women with long hair, ginger hair, red hair, dark hair -- it doesn't matter!" In other words, as long as he can get you in bed in ten minutes or less, it's all good.
So what makes him so darn special?
Uh, I think he worked at Universal Studios once.
Observations (The following comment comes from JLC, the sole person in the entire universe who cared enough about Joey to even mention his name to me):
~ Joey sure does know how to shake his ass.
Yeah, that's it. Oh, wait -- there's more! The next few observations come from Antonette (sup, girl?):
~ Whoa... talk about a dirty dancer! (Hey, hey... not Patrick Swayze. Eww.) In "You Got It" from the Disney Channel In Concert Special, you can catch Joey lifting his shirt and feeling himself up during that part where the guys go "You you you you got it." Talk about risque... Hey, if he's not ashamed to do that in public, I wonder what he does to himself under the sheets at night.
~ Joey tends to, tends to, uh, Joey tends to st-stu-stutter a lot, uh, a lot. Here are some laughable quotes from the man himself: "We HOPE to be succesful and we HOPEfully HOPE to be around for a long time," and, "ACTUALLY I scored 10 points ACTUALLY." Hey man, we got it the first time around. No need to repeat the same words a million times.
~ That boy sure can't stop smiling, eh? He probably smiles in his sleep too. I wonder when his face will crack.
Okay, that's the end of it. Really.
*~*Straight From Our Mouth's*~* Hey, look! I'm working on this page! See? I care about Joey too! Really! And so what if I haven't written the first section yet? I'll work on it later. Just get off my back, man. This page has been on the web for two whole weeks now, and only three people have actually noticed this empty bio so far. Does no one give a damn about Joey? Is Joey really that unpopular? It seems like no one cares at all for this poor fella! Everyone's probably too busy looking at Justin shaking his ass or something. (And what a nice ass it is, I must add. Ahem... getting off topic again... sorry about that.) Hey, if I left this one empty forever, no one would even notice. Of course, I'm not that inconsiderate, so I'll continue to add more crap to this page as I go. But will someone please help me out here? If you haven't noticed, there are no Joey sites out there, and there isn't a whole lot of Joey info available. So if you know anything at all about this forgotten fella, please email me and fill me in. Thanks!
Oh, yeah -- Meghan, a serious Joey fan, has asked me to place this message on this page... so here ya go. "I probably am the only REAL Joey lover out there..whats up with all those Justin pages?? Joey is a hottie with a body. I LOVE JOEY FATONE!!!!!!" Hmm... whaddaya think?