Snatch ***

For the past twenty years now the British film industry's sole output has been the accursed British costume drama, a genre in which characters spend two hours or so sipping tea and being polite to each other. About two years ago this was replaced by the British crime drama, a genre in which characters spend two hours or so playing with guns and calling each other 'cunts'. Now before fans of "Get Carter" and "The Long Good Friday" get on my back, let me clear something up. I love those films. What they have in common is grit. Grittiness is something the British do best. Witness "Nil by Mouth", "The Firm", "Naked", all great films. But the recent British crime films eschew this for Tarantinoesque hipness and fall flat on their face. Even the Americans can't seem to make decent crime films anymore. ironically, the only genre entry of note this year is "The Limey", a homage to British gritty drama, written and directed by an American.

Guy Ritchie is the man who sparked off this annoying trend with his debut "Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels", which received much publicity thanks to the gimmick of casting ex-soccer hardman Vinnie Jones. I have yet to see this movie for several reasons, one of them being this very casting. (Not to mention the awful Britpop soundtrack.) The use of Jones in "Gone in 60 Seconds" was certainly a gimmick but not so here. Vinnie Jones can act. He is a standout among a very talented cast. In fact were it not for the quality of acting on display I would have left the cinema after thirty minutes. The dialogue is awful, the camerawork irritating, and the plot the same as countless other crime thrillers. What kept me in my seat was the quality of the ensemble cast, in particular Alan Ford and Jason Statham (soon to be seen in John Carpenter's "Ghosts of Mars".

For 99.9% of the movie, Ritchie's direction is that of a twelve year old who just watched "Goodfellas", but there is one shot involving surveillance cameras which is one of the best moments of film-making all year. Apart from that however, Mr. Ritchie should consider himself very lucky to have such a cast to overshadow his lack of talent.