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undefined Irish Jokes

Irish Jokes

  • Did you hear about the Irish Kamikaze pilot?

  • He's on his 15th mission.
     
  • What about the Irish woodworm?

  • Found dead in a brick!
     
  • Did you hear about the latest Irish inventions?

  • A solar powered torch and a helicopter ejection seat!
     
  • What about the Irish man who though Polyfiller was parot food?

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  • How do you confuse an Irish man?

  • Put him in a barrel and tell him to piss in the corner.
     
  • How do you confuse an Irish labourer?

  • Put three shovels up against the wall and tell him to take his pick.
     
  • Why did the Irish get potatoes and the Arabs get the oil?

  • Because the Irish got first choice.
     
  • What do you call an Irishman with half a brain?

  • Gifted.
     
  • What's got an IQ of 200?

  • Ireland!
     
  • Paddy turns to Mick and says, "Mick, do you know you only actually use one third of your brain?". Mick says, "Well what do you do with the other half?"

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  • Paddy says to Mick, "I've got some bottles of Guinness in my bag, if you can guess how many are in there you can have them both".

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  • How do you burn an Irish mans ear?

  • You call him up when he's doing the ironing.
     
  • Why did the Irish man buy a black and white dog?

  • Because he thought the license would be cheaper.
     
  • How do you get an Irish man on the roof?

  • Tell him that drinks are on the house.