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Senseless. Meandering. Pompous. All are words you could use to describe my work as a music critic. After all, it's the nature of adjectives to modify nouns. Why I randomly picked those three is anybody's guess.

Regardless, this page is the official sponsor of my music reviews, features, interviews, wisecracks, tall tales, limericks, pagan rituals and biographies of character actor J.T. Walsh.

I know what you're thinking – this guy's full of horse apples. He ain't no writer; his website looks like a floater in a bathroom at Ponderosa! Well, boo-yaa, non-believers. I am now an official contributor to The Buffalo News, a real-life newspaper in a kinda-sorta real-life city.

For some reason, I am still allowed to indulge in acts of frolicsome mischief and devilish high-jinkery as a contributor to the super-glossy, fancy-dancy, gloss-drenched community glossary I like to call Buffalo Spree, a magazine that's all about Buffalo and tastes nothing like Spree.

I also am lucky enough to write for Artvoice, a stellar weekly newspaper that will print curse words if you write 'em.

Stuff has been written by me and edited by editors at these other illustrious pubs over the years: Rockpile magazine (RIP) and Traffic East.

If, for some masochistic reason, you want to peruse some more of my work, check out the archives page.

If you're a real glutton for punishment, check out this li'l nugget I created in my college daze (get it? I did drugs and stuff back then!): It's the most informative Gerardo fan site in the world. You think I'm joking? TRY ME, PUNK.