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PERSONALS
1.
Looking For Heavy Artillery?
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Adillards Artillery (Fine French Ammunition),
Memramcook, NB
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We have a recent addition to our heavy equipment section. We are literally giving away this used Abrams M-1 Tank to anyone who loves cross country
assaults. This all terrain vehicle is a popular little number for navigating the provinces dense backwoods. You could also scare the maird out of illegal
loggers on a nice Sunday afternoon Excursion. A snip at $100,000. CALL NOW! 555-Abrams
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2.
Love Pets?
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APE'S R-US,
Muddyview, NB
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Janice The Gorilla needs a new home. She is well trained. Well looked after. She eats plenty of fruit, nuts, burgers and loves beer. Please before phoning we
ask only that people with a spare bedroom or some grass for a backyard apply as trailer park people and apartment block residents are not really the ideal homeowners
for Gorillas to provide a spaceous friendly environment. For more information on Janice Call 555-ApesRus
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3.
Sturdy Fishing Boat For Sale
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Kelvin O'Grady,
Miramichi, NB
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Sturdy, waterproof 12ft Sea faring vessel complete with mast fixtures. New engine needed. Otherwise the Perfect sail/fishing boat. One careful owner. Boat has seen better times. It sunk
5 years ago and was recently discovered in Miramichi bay and dredged back u. It's completely restored (as picture shows). Come and take this beauty away for $500 Today!
Call Kelvin 555-3467
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4.
Free Tinned Food!!!
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Smart Options Cheap Foods,
Moncton, NB
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We are giving away thousands of tins of Smart Options tinned foods this weekend as part of our "Come and buy our cheap Crap" campaign. Come and celebrate
the opening of our new store at the Moncton Monster Mall Business Park. The first 500 customers will receive a years supply of our tinned products.
We look forward to seeing you!
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5.
Plastic Doll Needs Companionship
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40 year old Blonde,
Moncton, NB
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Blonde, bubbly outgoing female seeking partner of the opposite sex, preferably between 18-30 years for cozy nights of passion and friendship.
I am 6in tall, slim and very persuasive. I come complete with my own house, clothes, accessories and make-up kit. Also if you spank me I cry real tears.
If you think your the right man for me Call Barbie 555-WHATADOLL
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6.
Hot Male Doll Seeking Mindblowing Female
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30 year old Rugged Male,
Cambridge Narrows, NB
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Lonely hansome, rugged male looking for a sweet delicate skinny blonde to sweep off her dainty feet. I am 6ft tall and come complete with a beach buggy, several dinner suits
a small malibu apartment, oh and a tractor because I do a bit of farming at weekends. My tricks include the ability to rotate my head a full 360 degrees and to lose my limbs if
I'm not careful. If you think you like the sound of me well come and jump me baby! Call Ken 555-MANDOLL
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7.
Mature Likes Younger Guys
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Age: 50;
Bucketville, NB
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Hi I am a single man that is 6 ft tall has blue eyes, brown curly hair and blonde tips. I have a 19' in waist, weigh 80 lbs and is very very good
with dishes. I love to work hard at the gym and to go dancing at the local barn every weekend. If this does it for you I'm yours baby blue...
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8.
Horney Brit Babe
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Age: 33;
London, UK
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Fun loving London based babe. Loves to travel. Really Horny. Mad for it. Loves a bit of slap and tickle. Easy going. Enjoys boozing
fighting, pub brawls, drunken sex and dancefloors. If you have what it takes to satisfy me then your my geezer. Must be over 18. If your in my neigbourhood look me up.
Otherwise I'll find you! Email me and see essexslapper@dagenhamcarplant.drunk.uk
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9.
Une Exceptionnel Francais famme/Garcon
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Age: 29;
Amqui, QUE
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Bonjour I am a boy-girl extraordinaire. I love everything. I want a man for
a good hard time in Quebec. I live in an abbatoire with my Dad Jean. I collect homosexual pigs and birds. If your the man
for me you'll find me swinging from the gateposts in Jean-Baptisite Basiliste du Amqui.
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10.
A Rare Treasure
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Age: 58;
Caracas-Maracas-Patatas, CHILE
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I am a 58 year old Nicaraguan, I live in Chile with my pet Lobster, Margurita. I am 4ft'6", 25 lbs, which means that I am not tall or fat, but I ride
bike, swim with shark and I use my small body to break-in banks. I am fit baby. Looking to share myself with a woman of latino or polish roots. I'm a good time guy baby . You play
honest with me and I will show you why my nickname is the 'wriggler'. Call Chico 555-7895.
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11.
Girls Just Wanna Have Fun
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Twins Aged 22
Muddyview, NB
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Two full-figured fun loving girls that like carpentry, weightlifting and paintball. Seeking men who enjoy big girls hugs and kisses, shooting vermin
smoking pot and arm wrestling. We also like nice sunsets. If you are interested we are holiding a sticky bun bake-a-thon at our log cabin in Ever Glade this weekend. Think your
the men for us call Bertha and Bunny 555-7832.
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12.
Are you Stalking Me?
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Concerned Brunette. Aged 22
Scottish Settlement, NB
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I know who you are Mister that's why I have posted this ad. To show you I know. Well it won't work because now everyone knows your stalking me!
Oh, right...Hi I'm a very fit young woman in her mid twenties. I am an ex Miss wet T-shirt New Brunswick Champion. My name is Shirl and I enjoy outboard motorsports (boats with
engines). If you don't mind the water baby. Call me! Preferably now so we can fix that jerk Dan who's stalking me! 555-9991
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Greater Moncton Cavalier is not suitable for minors
� Copyright 2002-2003 Naughty Nigel Productions & Swordfish Designs
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