Sundance's Menarche Riutal

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A girl physically becomes a Woman when she has her first menstruation (period). Although still a child in many ways, it is a signal that she is growing up. For many, this has traditionally been the beginning of “The Curse,” and they were taught (by both words and unspoken signals) that this was a nasty, dirty, sinful part of themselves. Something to be ashamed of and embarrassed by.

But it wasn’t always so. Among most Pagan groups (that have coming of age females) Rituals have been created to welcome and celebrate this time, instead of laying the burden of guilt on a young Woman’s shoulders. One of the things that surprised but pleased me was that some of the other Women there seemed to relive their first time, finally letting loose their own burden that they had carried all these years. They celebrated themselves and their blood as they celebrated Sundance’s.

The Tribe of Women is alive and Magic is afoot!



Saturday, June 22, 2002
Kumasi Hill
Gather at 9:30 AM


Come to the Ritual dressed in very ordinary clothes. This will set the mood for Sundance when she comes back from her meditations.

Sundance is blindfolded and led through the woods by the women gathered while they talk and laugh gaily. She is finally led to a safe, comfortable (pillows & blankets) place away from where the Ritual will take place. She is lightly covered with black cloth.

The women gathered walk around her, drumming, rattling, etc and chanting three times in a joyous and loud way, laughing:
The butterfly enters the chrysalis,
The seed enters the ground,
The child enters the womb,
To be Transformed,
To be Transformed.

All stand silent as Sherri speaks to her.

You are becoming a woman,
And now you must find your own way.
Go deep, daughter.
The only way out is through.

The women gathered move around Sundance again, slowly, chanting very softly, whispering, and intently, with only one drum beating a slow and steady rhythm, serious now and without celebration three times:
The butterfly enters the chrysalis,
The seed enters the ground,
The child enters the womb,
To be Transformed,
To be Transformed.

At the end of the third time, the women still chant very softly and walk away, letting their voices and the drum beat slowly fade from Sundance’s senses so she is left completely alone.

Preparations are finished for the Ritual by the gathered women, quietly, so as not to disturb the meditations of Sundance. At this time we will change into our finery.

When all is ready, Sherri goes to get Sundance. She moves the black cloth, and removes the blind fold. Mother and Daughter sit together for a while. Sundance will ask questions or tell Sherri anything she feels like. This is also an opportunity for Sherri to share stories about her own coming of age, fond memories of Sundance’s conception and birth, hopes for her future, and especially advice about becoming a woman!

Sherri will tie a red ribbon around her own arm and around Sundances’. This symbolizes the tie that Mother and Daughter have. When it is severed in the Ritual, it does not symbolize a broken relationship, only an evolving one where Mother recognizes her Daughter’s womanhood.

When the two are ready, Sherri will ring the chime.

Maiden will go to them and lead them both to the circle, strewing flowers along the way. They will come into the circle, wait at the inside edge of it.

Call Directions

East:
Guardians of the East,
Element of Air,
Be with us today as we honor Sundance
As she begins her journey to Womanhood.
We ask that you share with us your gifts of knowledge and clear seeing.
Hail and welcome.
(Light torch)
Blessed be.


South:
Hail, Guardians of the South,
Element of Fire.
Be with us today as we honor Sundance
As she begins her journey to Womanhood.
We ask that you share with us your gifts of trust, of will, of far seeing.
Hail and welcome.
(Light torch)
Blessed be.

West:
Hail, Guardians of the West,
Element of Water.
Be with us today as we honor Sundance
As she begins her journey to Womanhood.
We ask that you share with us your gifts of compassion, fulfillment and inner seeing.
Hail and welcome.
(Light torch)
Blessed be.

North:
Hail, guardians of the North,
Element of Earth.
Be with us today as we honor Sundance
As she begins her journey to Womanhood.
We ask that you share with us your gifts of patience, wisdom and deep seeing.
Hail and welcome.
(Light torch)
Blessed be.

Center;
Hail Guardians of the Center,
Element of Spirit.
Be with here as we honor Sundance
As she begins her journey to Womanhood.
We ask that you share with us your gifts of community, wholeness and seeing the Divinity within ourselves.
Hail and welcome.
(Throw 1/2 of the resin into the flames)
Blessed be.

Cast Circle:
Gryph walks around the circle with saber, stopping at each Direction to draw pentacle;
“Here is the boundry of our sacrd circle;
Naught but love shall enter in,
Naught but love shall emerge from within,
All repeat at each Direction;
“Charge this by your powers, Old Ones.”
When circle is complete all take hands and say:
“With our hands and with our love,
This circle is cast and sealed.
So mote it be.”

Gryph: Who comes before these witnesses to claim and celebrate becoming a Woman?

Sundance: I, Sundance, do. (Sundance steps forward, dressed in white, accompanied by Sherri, who is tied to her with a red ribbon)

Gryph: Who brings her to this sacred circle?

Sherri: I, Sherri, her Mother, does.

Gryph: Is this Girl ready to become a Woman?

Sherri:
My Daughter has had her first Moon Time.
She is now physically an adult.
Although she is still my Daughter
And I am still responsible for her
For a few years yet,
I recognize that she is growing
And flowering into adulthood.
(cut red ribbon, keep yours)
Sundance, I love you and I will always be your Mother.
Come to me whenever you have need
And I will embrace you.
(hold Sundance for a moment, then step away and join the other women in the circle)

Gryph: Is this Girl ready to claim her Womanhood?

Sundance: I am. My first Moon Time was ____, and I am ready to begin my journey.

Gryph: What does this mean to you?

Sundance: (What DOES this mean to you, Sundance? What did you experience during your meditations and during your first blood?)

Gryph:
From this day onward shall your life
And the cycles of the moon
Be entwined.
Light now the candles of the Triple Goddess
The Three who are One.

Maiden:
White do we light for the Maiden,
White as the snow or the flowers of May.
The color of the waxing moon.
Young one,
Full of freshness; full of innocence and joy--
We honor the time of childhood.
Sundance, light the white candle for the Maiden.
(Sundance lights white candle.)
Blessed be.

Mother:
Red do we light for the Mother,
Red as the flowing blood of life.
The color of the Moon at full.
Giver of life, beauty and abundance;
Ripe, full of love and passion for many things.
We honor the time of Motherhood.
Sundance, light the red candle for the Mother.
(Sundance lights red candle.)
Blessed be.

Crone:
Black do we light for the Crone,
Black as the darkest winter’s night.
The color of the waning Moon.
Wise Grandmother, who has seen many seasons
Come and go;
Old... wise... fierce...
We honor the time of Cronehood.
Sundance, light the black candle for the Crone.
(Sundance lights black candle.)
Blessed be.

Gryph:
Changing Woman,
We love and honor you
In all your changes.
Hail and welcome.
Blessed be.
Sundance, now the Three who are One are within you,
And you are in them.
You are prepared to enter the Circle of Women.
Do you know what this means?

Sundance: Not yet.

Gryph:
Walk the circle, Sundance.
Listen to the wisdom of the Elements.
Take their gifts to you and always remember their words.

Sundance goes first to east, then circles around to each Direction.

Sundance kneels in front of East.

East:
Sundance,
know that as a Woman
Once in the month when your blood flows
Or the moon is full, your mind will be
Open and receptive to things unseen.
Learn to see with the mind’s eye,
And to listen to the wind.
Heed your inner voice,
(lift Sundance from her knees)
To be a Woman is to gain Wisdom
. Take this gift (gives a feather)
So that you will always remember this.
(Kneel in front of Sundance)
Blessed be, Woman-child.

Sundance moves to the South and kneels.

South:
Sundance,
Know that to be a Woman
Is to know the joy of passions’ flame
Learn to open your arms and heart to love
And to return it freely.
Be guided always by your mind’s vision
And your hearts desire.
(Lift Sundance from her knees)
To be a Woman is to know Love
Take this gift (candle holder and candle)
So that you will always remember this.
(Kneel in front of Sundance)
Blessed be, Woman-child.

Sundance continues her journey to West and kneels.

West:
Sundance,
Know that to be a Woman
Is to feel the ebb and flow of the tides of life
Learn to move to the gentle rhythms of your own body
And to flow with the current of your life
(lift Sundance from her knees)
To be a Woman is to feel the flow of life.
Take this gift (shell)
So that you will always remember this.
(Kneel in front of Sundance)
Blessed be, Woman-child.

Sundance goes to the North and kneels.

North:
Sundance,
Know that to be a Woman
Is to possess the magic of making.
Learn to bring forth and to nurture
That which the mind can envision,
The heart love and the spirit sense.
(Lift Sundance from her knees)
To be a Woman is to possess the power to create.
Take this gift (rock)
So that you always remember this.
(Kneel in front of Sundance)
Blessed be, Woman-child.

Sundance ends her journey to the Elements with Center, kneels.

Center;
Sundance,
Know that to be a Woman
Is to contain Divinity within you.
Learn to recognize and honor yourself.
Feel your connection to all things.
(Lift Sundance from her knees)
To be a Woman is to feel the web of all creation within you.
Take this gift (cauldron)
So that you always remember this.
(Kneel in front of Sundance)
Blessed be, Woman-child.

Gryph:
You have opened the door to Womanhood
And stand before the brink of the joys, pain, and raw power of being a Woman.
Listen to the words of the wise ones,
And if you feel you are ready to accept their wisdom,
Exchange your tokens.

Maiden:
Sundance,
Always remember your childhood.
Always see the world through the wondering eyes of a child.
Let fantasy, imagination and trust in the universe always be a part of your life.
Do you promise now,
Here in this sacred circle,
In front of the gods, your friends and your true nature
To always nurture, respect and hold close your childhood
And your childlike qualities?

Sundance: I do.

Exchange of flowers (Sundance gives one of her white daisies to the child, the child gives her a white rose)

Mother:
Sundance,
You are embarking on a wondrous and uncertain journey.
Intense emotions will billow your sails
As you ride the waves of adolescence
Into the harbor of Womanhood.
You will have moments of incredible delight and joy,
Times of sadness and despair.
All these experiences will serve you as you grow and reach toward your potential.
Do you promise to live every moment,
To not let your past hold you back
And not let thoughts of the future keep you from living in the present?
To grasp and use wisely the power of Womanhood?

Sundance: I do.

Exchange of flowers. (Red rose for white daisy)

Crone:
I am what you will eventually become, Child.
Past childhood, but still standing on its lessons,
Through with my child bearing and raising years,
But still holding memories and lessons from it.
I have reached the power of the Dark Moon,
The Wisdom and knowledge gained over a life time.
I help others as I still walk my own path.
Sundance, do you promise to embrace me?
To embrace the dark side of your self and love it?
To come to the Dark Mother for guidance and strength?

Sundance: I do.

Exchange of flowers. (Gardenia for white daisy)

Gryph:
All here are gathered for you, Sundance.
To mark this point of growth and power in your life.
Each of us loves and supports you
As you begin the next chapter of your life.
Listen to our words for you,
And hear the love and support we have for you.
Listen closely to all that is said to you
About being a woman and about womanhood,
Both here in this circle this day,
And outside in the mundane world everyday.
Not everything you are told is true.
Some words are false and rotten,
Meant only to harm you and hold you back.
It is up to you to distinguish between true words,
And false ones.

Each person says their piece, exchanges flowers. Some will have truth to pass on, others will tell lies. Sundance must listen and decide which. Each Woman may have more than one truth/lie to pass on.

Truth and lies. This is one of the places where all of us will participate. Think about all the things you were told about being a Woman. Remember the wonderful things you found to be true about the sacredness and joy of being a Woman. Pass on one or two of these precious truths to Sundance along with a beautiful red flower. Remember also the hurtful lies that you were told about the weakness, sinfulness and inferiority of being a Woman that were either told to you or insinuated from your experiences. This is a very important part of the Ritual for Sundance. Tell her these things as if they are true as well (example, “Women have a natural tendency to do wrong”). With the lie you chose to tell her, hand out a flower that is damaged in some way—brown petals, missing petals, etc. Each person says their piece, exchanges flowers. Some will have truth to pass on, others will tell lies. Sundance must listen and decide which. Each Woman may have more than one truth/lie to pass on.

Sundance (when a lie is told):
I do not accept these words.
They are false.
(She takes the offered flower and throws it into the fire and does not offer one of her own)

Sundance (when the truth is told):
Your words are true,
I hear your wisdom.
(Exchanges white daisy for red chrysanthemum)

High Priestess challenge

Gryph (when all truths and lies have been spoken):
You still have some of your child flowers, Sundance.
Since they represent your childhood,
And you are through with that on this day,
Throw the rest of them into the fire and let them burn
To symbolize your step from childhood into adulthood.

Sundance:
No, I will not burn them all.
I will burn some as a symbol for this transition,
But I will not burn them all.
I treasure my childhood and
Honor that part of me that will always be childlike.
I will not burn them all.

Gryph (kneels in front of Sundance):
I bow to your Woman’s wisdom.
Sundance goes to fire, throws in those flowers she wants to, keeps some.

All present howl, yell, celebrate. We all help each other tie our flowers around our arms with red ribbon (to leave our hands free!)

Spiral dance starts, led by Sundance, chant starts.

We are the flow,
And we are the ebb.
We are the weavers,
We are the web.

When ready, we circle around Sundance and tone.

Ground and center, reassemble into a loose circle.

Kira brings out Cakes on a platter, kneels in front of Sundance. Sundance blesses the Cakes and Kira hands them to the next person in the circle.

Everyone is given a cup with a little juice in it.
All: “Once I was a child.” All sip juice, then all pre-menstruation females sit, all others take one step into the circle.

All Women left have a little red wine poured into their cups. “Then I became a woman.” All sip red wine, then all females still having their menses sit and others advance one more step.

All Women left standing have a little white wine poured into their cups. “Now I am a Wise one (sip of white wine).”

All Women sit and relax by the fire as wine, juice, cakes are passed out and we eat, talking of childhood, womanhood and cronehood. This is where any of you with gifts can give them to Sundance and tell of their significance.

Women rise and form a circle once more.

Presentation of necklaces.

Gryph:
We stand now, Woman to Woman,
At the center of the Circle
Where all things meet their opposites.
Take this charm of the silver crescent
As a reminder of this:
That as the Horned Moon represents
the Goddess, giver of Life,
So does it symbolize the horns of the Goddess of death.
She who has the power to create life
Also has the power to take it.
All things in Nature are cyclic.
There is no birth without death.
The wheel turns,
Again and again.
The magical power of Womanhood
Is to accept responsibility.

Sherri places necklace around Sundance’s neck, kisses her .

Woman presenting Sherri’s necklace:
Sherri,
Watching as your child becomes an adult
Is a difficult thing for a woman.
We are needed less and less by the very being
We gave birth to.
We can see the time when we will be only
A small part of our child’s life.
Sundance will become the Sun,
And we become a shining star,
Reflecting her brilliance as we grow old.
Take this necklace of a silver star
As a symbol of this;
This child-woman carries you into the future.
As you ebb, she will flow.
(Place necklace round Sherri’s neck)
To all assembled: Blessed be to the Mother.

All: Blessed be to the Mother.

Woman presenting Tim’s necklace;
Sherri,
There is another that was involved with
Creating this Being.
As a Father sees his daughter grow up and away,
He also feels the pain of separation.
From holding her hand when crossing a street,
Now he must let go of that hand,
Seemingly far too soon.
He also continues in her.
Take this necklace
For he who is not here,
But stands here with in this child-woman.
(gives Sherri the necklace)
To all assembled: Blessed be to the Father.

All: Blessed be to the Father.

Charge of the Goddess

Gryph:
Listen to the words of the Great Mother,
She who of old was also called among men
Artemis, Astarte, Athene, Dione, Melusine, Aphrodite,
Cerriden, Dana, Arianrhod, Isis, Bride, Yemeya,
And by many other names.
Hear the words of the Star Goddess;
She in the dust of whose feet are the host of heaven,
And whose body encircles the universe.

Woman reads the Charge:
I who am the beauty of the green earth,
And the white Moon among the stars,
And the mystery of the waters,
And the desire of the heart of man,
Call unto thy soul.
Arise, and come unto Me.

For I am the soul of Nature,
Who gives life to the Universe.
From me all things proceed,
And unto me all things must return;
And before my face,
Beloved of Gods and of men,
Let thine innermost divine self be enfolded in the rapture of the infinite.

Let My worship be within the heart that rejoiceth;
For behold,
All acts of love and pleasure
Are My rituals.
And therefore let there be beauty and strength,
Power and compassion,
Honor and humility,
Mirth and reverence within you.

And thou who thinkest to seek for Me,
Know thy seeking and yearning shall avail thee not
Unless thou knowest the Mystery;
That if that which thou seekest thou find not within thee,
Thou wilt never find it without thee.

For behold,
I have been with thee from the beginning;
And I am that which is attained at the end of desire.


A Woman among Women


Sundance speaks to us as a Bleeding Woman. She thanks us, says something about how she feels about becoming a woman and how she feels about entering into the circle of Womanhood with us. When she is done, she signals the Ritual to continue.

Gryph:
We give thanks to the Three who are One.

Crone:
Wise Grandmother,
Old, wise and fierce,
We honor the time of Cronehood and ask
That you go if you must,
But stay within us if you will.
(Sundance snuffs black candle)
Blessed be.

Mother;
Giver of life,
Full of love and passion,
We honor the time of Motherhood and ask
That you go if you must,
But stay within us if you will.
(Sundance snuffs red candle)
Blessed be

Maiden;
Young one,
Fresh, innocent and joyous,
We honor the time of Childhood and ask
That you go if you must,
But stay within us if you will.
(Sundance snuffs white candle)
Blessed be.

Gryph:
Changing Woman,
We love and honor you
In all your changes,
When we love and honor ourselves,
Where you reside.
Let us all take a moment to feel
Her within ourselves.
(Quiet for a moment)
Blessed be.

Directions are released

Center:
Guardians of Center,
Element of Spirit,
We thank you for your presence at our sacred rite today.
Stay with Sundance, let her feel her Divinity always.
Hail and Farewell.
(Throw rest of resin into flames)
Blessed be.

North:
Guardians of the North,
Element of Earth.
We thank you for your presence at our sacred rite today.
Stay with Sundance,
Help her use her power to create wisely.
Hail and farewell.
(Snuffs torch)
Blessed be

West:
Guardians of the West,
Element of Water.
We thank you for your presence at our sacred rite today.
Stay with Sundance,
Help her to honor the flow of life through her body.
Hail and farewell.
(Snuffs torch)
Blessed be.

South:
Guardians of the South,
Element of Fire.
We thank you for your presence at our sacred rite today.
Stay with Sundance,
Help her to give and accept love in her life.
Hail and farewell.
(Snuffs torch)
Blessed be.

East:
Guardians of the East,
Element of Air.
We thank you for your presence at our sacred rite today.
Stay with Sundance,
Help her to open her mind and be receptive.
Hail and farewell.
(Snuffs torch)
Blessed be.

By the Earth that is her body,
By the Air that is her breath,
By the Fire of her bright spirit,
By the Water of her living womb,
And by the circle of this community,
This circle is open, but never broken.
May the peace of the Lord and Lady
Go in our hearts.
We merry meet,
Merry part,
And merry meet again!
Blessed be.

_______________________________________________________
Ritual written and compiled by Gryphon Rosemead, relying heavily on the following resources:
Rites of Passage, The Pagan Wheel of Life, By Pauline and Dan Campanelli
WiccaCraft for Families, by Margie McArthur
These individuals helped a great deal: Brydie Palmore, Al Dunmore, Barbara Green, Litz Plummer and, of course, Sundance!
All of these wonderful photographs were done by BJ Miller. You can contact her at bonbon@netpath.net