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Harmony

Rated- PG13

Summary- There are two vampires with a soul. The world is falling into chaos because of this anomaly. There is no way around it. One of them has to die. But which one?

Spoilers- This takes place after Buffy’s Chosen and Angel’s Destiny

Disclaimer- Joss Whedon owns all the characters from BTVS and ATS. I’m just borrowing. Although, I’m kinda reluctant to give back a certain bleach blonde

Chapter 1

It had been four months since the battle with the First. Buffy hadn’t spoken of that day since. Dawn and she had separated from the others, traveling the land of Europe. A vacation, Buffy had called it. And Dawn had agreed. They both needed a break. The siblings reveled in the normal bustle that surrounded them. They were just two regular girls seeing the sites and bonding.

After awhile, Dawn began to get worried, though. Buffy kept suggesting new places to go. She never mentioned going back. She acted as if they had always been on the move, and that they had never faced an ancient incorporeal evil.

Dawn had brought up the past herself, but was shot down quickly.

“Are we ever going back?” Dawn asked her sister.

Buffy had barely glanced at her. “We will. . . Hey, ya wanna go see that castle? Herrenchiemsee Castle? Did I say that right?”

“Yeah, Buffy. Whatever.”

Buffy was stalling. This trip had far passed breakage. It had ventured into fleeing territory. Buffy knew it. Dawn knew it. And Buffy knew that Dawn knew it. But neither said anything. They continued to explore the beautiful sites and exotic food.

The truth was that Dawn wished the same thing Buffy did. She never wanted to join the others in Cleveland. She longed to pretend they were nobodies, who had done nothing special; and would never do anything special. Deep inside she knew that wasn’t possible. The new slayers needed guidance. Faith was taking charge, but she couldn’t handle the job alone.

They stayed inside that morning because it was raining. Normally Buffy would have dragged Dawn out first thing to start their fun-a-thon. Instead they stayed inside, Buffy watching a few French shows she didn’t understand, and Dawn writing in her new diary.

She was on her third page of ranting when the phone rang. Dawn’s adjoining room had a phone. She reached over and picked up. She was about to say hello when she heard her sister beat her to it.

“Hello?”

“Buffy, hello.”

Dawn straightened. Giles. And he sounded serious.

“Giles? I’m surprised to hear from you.”

“Yes, well. . . It has been quite difficult getting a hold of you. You haven’t staid in one hotel for long.”

“There is just so much to see. So much to do,” Buffy chirped.

Too cheerful, Dawn thought. It’s all an act.

“I trust France is treating you well then,” Giles stated.

“Oh yeah! Tons! It’s treating us real well. Dawn and I are having a blast here. Yesterday we saw the Eiffel Tower. Then we ate at this maga cool restaurant outdoors. I had the Salade de Tomates et Mozzarella. And Dawn had the Soo. . . So. . . ffle au From something or other. The swiss cheese thingy.”

“Yes, yes. Souffl¢ e au Fromage?”

“You speak French?”

“A little,” he admitted.

“And here I thought you only knew Latin and Aramaic. Wow, Giles, I’m impressed.”

There was a sigh from Giles. Here it comes, Dawn thought, the big bombshell. Something dark is about to rise in Sunny. . . Cleveland. I can practically hear him cleaning his glasses.

“Buffy, I’m afraid you should cut your vacation short. I have made a discovery that concerns you.”

“A discovery?” Buffy spoke slowly. “Bad discovery? Or good discovery?”

“I wish I could be the bearer of good news. But I am sorry to say that this qualifies as dire. I have uncovered a prophecy.”

“I’m not dying again.”

“No, no! It isn’t about you at all actually.”

“I don’t understand,” Buffy said. “Why are you telling me then?”

“Because the text is about Angel.”

“Oh.”

“There is to be another apocalypse soon. I’m a little fuzzy on the date. The scroll I found speaks of a champion. A vampire with a soul. He will sacrifice himself to save all, with the heart of love. Because of this selfless act he shall be granted a reward.”

There was silence.

“Buffy?” Giles asked after a moment.

“Yeah? I’m here.”

“I think the news would be best sent by you. Everyone is quite busy here. Besides, I think Angel would feel most comfortable talking with you.”

“D-Does it say what the reward is?” Buffy asked.

“No, it doesn’t. Its precise words are: He shall be rewarded from the light above.”

“The light above,” Buffy mumbled. “Sunlight?”

“It could be a metaphor, Buffy.”

“Right.”

“I have booked a flight tomorrow -”

“Dawn and I are going to Italy tomorrow!” Buffy violently interrupted.

“Buffy, I’m sorry to ruin your plans, but this is very important. Even if you don’t deliver this news there is the matter of -”

“Apocalypse. Yada yada yada. Well, big news, Giles, I’m not the slayer anymore. I’m ’a’ slayer. And this slayer is taking a leave of absence. I think I deserve it.”

“Yes, you do. But that doesn’t change the fact that-”

“Bye, Giles. I’ll send a postcard.”

There was a click.

“Buffy?” A pause followed. “Buffy, are you there?”

“She hung up,” Dawn told Giles. “I’ll try to reason with her. Bye, Giles.”

With that, Dawn hung up as well. The dial tone filtered into Dawn’s right ear. Dawn removed the receiver and stared at it. Buffy hung up on Giles. Buffy hung up on Giles!

Dawn exited her room. She made her way into the small sitting area of their suite. She found Buffy opening her blue suitcase.

“Hey, Dawnie. How does Italy sound?” Buffy said.

Instead of answering, Dawn changed the subject. “Who was on the phone?”

“Oh, that was Giles. He was just checking up on us.”

The teen crossed her arms. She frowned. “Liar.”

Buffy turned her head. “Huh?”

“Liar,” Dawn repeated. “He wasn’t checking up on us. I heard the whole conversation.”

“Oh my God, you were listening in on my conversation!? I so knew that having a phone in your room was bad. I was imagining you calling some French boy at two in the morning. But this. . .” Buffy shook her head. “That was private, Dawn.”

“It concerns me too. Buffy, I want to go home,” Dawn said.

There was a choked laugh from her sister. “Home is rubble in a giant crater.”

“Home is where our friends are. They need us,” Dawn corrected. “We can’t run forever.”

“I’m not running. I’m just not ready to go back yet.”

“When then? When will you be ready to go back? One year? Two? Twenty?”

“Please, Dawnie.” The slayer’s voice was soft. Pleading. “I can’t.”

“Buffy, I know this is hard.”

“You think this is hard!? You don’t know the definition of hard. Try being the slayer and then tell me what hard is.”

Dawn’s eyes grew larger. “That isn’t fair!”

“People are dead. I was their leader. You don’t know what it is like to know that they are gone because of you. If I go back I‘ll have to face that. I‘ll have to remember.”

“You knew some weren’t going to make it.”

Buffy closed her eyes. She gripped the edge of the green armchair. “But I didn’t know ’he’ wouldn’t make it.”

“Who?”

“I told him to leave. He had finished what he was supposed to do. But he wouldn’t go. He had to be the hero.”

“Spike,” Dawn whispered.

“I thought I had time,” Buffy went on. “That he’d always be around. He was a vampire, ya know. Supposed to keep on going and going like the Energizer Bunny. He wasn’t supposed to die!”

She watched as Buffy fell apart. She had no idea what to say or do.

“I should have made him go. I should have done something. But I left. He told me to go and I did.” Buffy shook. She opened her eyes, but it seemed as if they were seeing something else. Something four months ago. “I knew that he was the one. I wanted to become a cookie for him. Except it was too late. Time was up.”

Dawn scrunched up her forehead. Cookie? This wasn’t the time to comment on Buffy’s peculiar way of thinking, though. So she kept quiet.

Buffy met Dawn’s gaze. “Why is it that we don’t realize how important something is until it is gone?”

“Did you love him?” Dawn questioned.

Buffy’s green eyes watered. “I think maybe I did.” She took a deep breath. “But it doesn’t matter now.”

Dawn stepped forward. She put her arms around Buffy.

“I miss him too.”

The slayer leaned against her younger sibling, the usual strong woman needing support. They clung to each other, crying, wishing they could change the past. But all they had was the future. A future without Spike.

_________________________________________________

Chapter 2

“They lied to you,” Wesley stated matter of factly. “There is no mention of a chalice of torment.”

He had two books opened. They sat facing him on the desk. One was a translated version, while the other was the original. He had been comparing both and found very little difference.

“We kinda figured, mate. It being filled with Mountain Dew and all,” Spike commented. He was seated in a chair next to his grandsire, his head propped up by a hand. He looked bored.

Angel leaned forward. “What does it include exactly?”

“Basically I’ve told you everything in it. A coming darkness, apocalyptic battle, a few plagues, and some. . . fiends.”

The dark-haired vampire cast a glance at Spike. The blonde rose an eyebrow.

“In all reality,” Wes stated,” It isn’t very specific. When the champion has completed these obstacles he will be given a gift. To live until he shall die. To shanshu.”

“Read it to me. Word for word,” Angel requested.

A snort came from Spike. “Bloody hell. I am not sitting here for another two hours while you dissect . . .”

“No one invited you,” Angel growled. He glared at him darkly.

“This does concern me,” Spike pointed out. “Two vampires with a soul, remember? We don’t know which one of us this thing is talking about.”

Angel didn’t seem to have anything to say to that.

Clearing his throat, Wesley slipped on his glasses. He shifted his eyes to the beginning of the prophecy and began to read.

Spike got to his feet. “Right then. I’ll just see myself out.”

Neither acknowledged his departure. Figures. No one seemed to want him around. Well, except for that cute scientist. But truth was that he didn’t belong here. Images of the past ran through his mind. He hadn’t really fitted in with Buffy’s lot either.

Spike stuffed his hands in the pockets of his leather duster. He walked down the hall, having nowhere to go.

*************************

Buffy hesitated outside the unfamiliar house. It was gray with a white door. Stone steps led up to the entrance.

She shifted from foot to foot, staring at the doorbell.

“Are you going to push it? Or should I?” Dawn said.

The teen wrapped her arms around herself. “It’s cold out here. Please hurry up.”

Buffy nodded. “Give me a minute. I’m just a little scared.”

“I thought you were okay with this. You said you were okay.”

The slayer sighed. “I know what I said, Dawn. And I meant it. I’m ready. I really am.”

Dawn frowned. Her sister sounded as if she was trying to convince herself.

The previous day had been spent talking. Buffy had admitted to her attempt at escapism. They had shared memories and feelings. Dawn had confessed about how she still felt bad about never forgiving Spike. Buffy had spilled about her regrets on waiting until it was too late to give him a chance. There had been mentions of Anya and the SIT, but it had been mostly about Spike. His death had hit the hardest.

Finally Buffy decided to move on. She would accept what happened and live. That is what Spike gave his life for, wasn’t it? So that she and the others could live.

Buffy purchased two plane tickets to Cleveland. She was actually smiling and feeling refreshed. She was ready to face her friends. At least that was how she acted until now.

“Then push the damn button!” Dawn snapped.

Buffy turned toward Dawn, her green eyes wide. “Dawn Summers! Do you know what Mom would say?”

The door swung open during their squabbling. A middle-aged man stood there. He wore dark slacks and a green sweater. He peered at them through his spectacles.

“Buffy? Dawn?”

The girls froze. They felt as if they had been caught by a parent.

“Oh, hey, Giles. We wanted to surprise you. So, uh, surprise,” Buffy told him with a forced smile.

“So good to see you. And yes, this is a surprise,” the watcher replied.

“I was just about to ring the doorbell.”

“Uh, yes.” He ran a hand through his thinning hair. “I heard your bickering and decided to intervene.”

Dawn rubbed her arms. “Giles, can we come in? I’m freezing out here.”

“Oh, yes, yes, of course.” Giles held the door open wider, inviting his sergeant daughters inside.

The place was nicely furnished. It had white carpet and walls. There were a few paintings on the wall. Buffy thought she recognized one as Van Gogh. She was proud of that. School hadn’t been a total waste after all.

They were led into the living room. Buffy opened her mouth, about to comment on the big screen television, but decided not to. She could tease him later after they’d discussed this matter about Angel.

The couch was brown and quite cozy. Buffy could imagine falling asleep on it. She wished that she could lean back, close her eyes, and fall into nothingness. There were important things that needed to be straightened out, though. She was needed.

“So, Giles, hit me.”

“Excuse me.”

Buffy shook her head with a small smile. “Tell me about the prophecy.”

“Oh, yes.” He got up and exited a room. A moment later he came in carrying a rolled up scroll.

“I found this on a dying man. He was protecting it with his life. A demon almost got his hands on it, but our band dispatched the threat. It was too late for the man, regretfully. He shoved the scroll at me, and then begged for me to keep it out of the hands of evil.”

Giles undid the parchment. It had an archaic appearance, having been weathered. He lay it down on the coffee table, putting a book on each end to prevent curling. Buffy leaned forward, studying the gibberish symbols.

“It’s a mixture of a couple languages. So far I have translated the Aramaic and Egyptian,” Giles explained.

Raising her head, Buffy asked, “So you haven’t read the whole thing then?”

“Heavens no. Not even half. The Aramaic section speaks of a champion that I can only assume is Angel. It describes him as a demon with a soul. Since Angel is the only. . .living vampire in existence with such qualifications. . .”

Buffy nodded. “I see.”

“He will face the coming darkness, sacrifice himself for the greater good, and receive a reward. The reward I told you about on the phone.”

“The sunlight.”

“Light from above, yes,” Giles said. “These things are rarely literal, though.”

“Gotcha.”

“So, are we going to LA?” Dawn questioned, breaking her silence.

“If that is what Giles wants.” She paused. “Maybe I should just call.”

“Buffy, this isn’t the sort of news you break over the phone. I think it would be best for you to tell him in person,” Giles said.

Buffy sighed. “I guess we’re going to sunny California.”

___________________________________________________

Chapter 3

It didn’t take long for Willow to answer the door. It swung open to reveal the red-head. She stared out at Buffy with bloodshot eyes. Her hair was mussed, as if the witch hadn’t bothered to brush it that morning.

“Buffy.”

The slayer reached out and gave her best friend a hug.

“It is good to see you.”

“It is good to be seen,” Buffy replied.

Both girls gave small smiles.

Buffy was led into the apartment. It was small, but homey. She had expected to find Kennedy there too, but it appeared to just be Willow staying there.

They both settled on the blue loveseat. There was an awkward silence. Neither knew what to say.

“So . . .” Buffy began.

“Yeah?” Willow asked.

“How you like Cleveland?”

“It’s a lot like Sunnydale, but bigger. Same oogly booglies running around.”

Buffy nodded.

They went back to silence.

Willow looked down at her hands. And Buffy knew something was definitely wrong.

“Are you okay, Wills? Did something happen? You aren’t mad at me, are you?”

Raising her head, Willow shook her head. “No, nothing to do with you. Oh, Buffy, Kennedy and I broke up.”

Concern came over Buffy. She knew what it felt like to have your heart broken. “What happened?”

“We just didn’t fit. We were two corner pieces of a puzzle trying to fit together. That never works. It was a mutual agreement. We both felt like it was time.” Her eyes glistened with unshed tears. “It still hurts, though.”

Buffy took Willow’s hand and squeezed it. “Oh, Will, I’m sorry.”

“It is so hard. Everything reminds me of her. I turn on the TV and see a show she used to watch. Even this morning when I ate breakfast I thought of her. Kennedy loved pancakes. We made funny shapes together.” She paused and then added quietly, “Tara and I did that too.”

Buffy’s heart went out to her friend. She could relate. Although the occurrences were less frequent, Spike still invaded her mind. The other day she saw Buffalo Wings on the menu at a restaurant and had the urge to cry.

Buffy wanted to tell Willow that Kennedy wasn’t the one and that someday she would find her missing half. But she knew that Tara had been it. There would never be another to take her place. In the back of her mind, Buffy wondered who her one was. Had it been Spike? Or was Angel really her second half? If so, maybe there was still hope.

Willow, you want to get away?”

“Huh?”

“I have to go to LA and tell Angel about a prophecy. Wanna come with? We can go shopping and dancing. It’ll take our minds off stuff for awhile.”

“Didn’t you already get your mind off stuff in Europe?” Willow asked.

Buffy bit her lip. Was this an attempt to run away again?

“Okay,” Willow suddenly answered. “I’ll go.”

***************************

Buffy slammed the phone down in frustration.

“He’s in ‘another’ meeting,” she told her sister.

They were both in Giles’s kitchen. Buffy had been trying to get a hold of Angel for hours now. Dawn was currently searching through the watcher’s selection of food for an afternoon snack.

“I guess we’ll have to make a surprise visit.”

Dawn held up a box of instant hot chocolate. “Cocoa?”

Buffy froze. She could see the label on the box. It was the kind with the tiny marshmallows already mixed in with the powder.

Lowering her arm, Dawn sighed. “Sorry. I didn’t think.”

“No. No, it’s all right. I’ll have a mug.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah.”

The teen prepared the two drinks in the microwave. Then they sat next to each other at the island, sipping away at the hot liquid.

“Do you think he’s in heaven?” Dawn quietly asked.

The question lingered in the air. Buffy opened her mouth, but didn’t know how to respond. She had no answer. She didn’t know about the qualifications to get accepted into certain dimensions.

“If any vampire deserved to go to heaven it would be one that saved the world. So. . .” Buffy faced Dawn. “I’d like to think so.”

Dawn nodded her head in understanding.

The thought of Spike going to hell was devastating. A champion deserved much more.

************************

“This is hell,” Spike complained. “Being stuck here in this forsaken law firm. I’d rather have to face the mob in Prague again.”

“Then why stick around, Spike? You aren’t bound to Wolfram and Hart anymore. You should go find yourself a crypt with a view.”

“I think I might just do that. Mosey on over to Europe. The senior partners have this lil mess cleaned up, so I don’t rightly have to stay.”

“It’s only temporary.”

“Your problem, not mine,” Spike declared.

He thrust his hand into his coat. He took out a pack of cigarettes and lit one. He puffed away at the stick, purposely making the smoke float over toward Angel. Too bad the poof didn’t have to breathe.

Spike leaned back in his chair and propped his feet up on Angel’s desk.

“For someone with a soul you sure seem to care about only yourself,” Angel stated.

“For someone with a soul you seem to be siding with the dark side of the force.”

A growl emerged from Angel’s throat. Spike smirked, enjoying the rise he had created.

“If the senior partners are right. . .”

“Because they never lie,” Spike interrupted.

Scowling, Angel continued. “If they are right then this situation isn’t just about Las Angelus. If it doesn’t get taken care of it will spread. So, Spike, you can run along to Europe if you want to but don’t be surprised if things follow.”

Spike knew he was right. And that was something he hated to admit.

Spike took his cigarette and put it out on the top of the desk.

Angel got to his feet. He pointed to the door. “Out! Now! Go to another room, a bar, cemetery, or Europe for all I care. Just leave my office! Or I’ll call security. And now that you’re corporeal they can make you leave.”

“No need to shout. I’m going.”

Spike got out of his seat and headed to the exit.

Once more that day Spike stood in the hallway. He banged his head back against the wall. He really needed to figure out where to go because he certainly felt like he was trapped in hell there.

____________________________________________________

 

Chapter 4

Spike spotted Harmony behind her desk, looking bored. He was about to walk on by, ignoring her, but abruptly stopped. He studied her. She was chewing some gum with her mouth open, playing with a piece of golden hair.

“What?” Harmony asked.

“Nothing,” Spike replied. He began to go down the hall again, but turned back around. “Actually, there is something. Can I talk to you? Somewhere private.”

Harmony sighed. “I’ve done some thinking and I’m not having sex with you again.”

“That’s not what I’m after. I just want to have a discussion.”

“I have a job to do. I can’t just walk away.”

“Right, because you are so busy.” He growled and grabbed her arm. He hauled her out of her seat. “Come on.”

Harmony jerked her arm, but Spike prevented her from breaking lose. “Hey, you can’t order me around! I’m not your slave! Let me go!”

“Bloody women,” Spike cursed.

He led the natural blond to an office. Without knocking, he thrust open the door. It happened to be the same room the secretary and he had taken over before. The occupant glanced up. He immediately got to his feet.

“You don’t have to kick me out this time. I’m leaving. Just let me get my paperwork.” The man hurriedly gathered some things off his desk. “There, all yours.”

Spike gave him an unnerving smirk. “Very kind of you, mate. We won’t be long.”

“R-ight.” The man shut the door on his way out.

It suddenly occurred to Spike that the Wolfram and Hart employee probably thought they wanted the office to bang each other. He had just made it sound like it didn’t take long at all to get the job done. That’s great, Spike thought. So much for boosting your sexy big bad persona.

Harmony faced him, annoyed. She crossed her arms. “What do you want, Spike?”

“I wanted to discuss the other day. When we . . .”

“What is there to discuss? You used me and I let you.”

Spike took an unneeded deep breath. He knew he was going to regret this. But he couldn’t get the incident out of his head. He had to do something about it.

“Harm, it is never going to happen again. I was a little out of my rocker from being a ghost and just needed to . . . feel something.” Now he sounded like the slayer. “What we did was wrong.”

“God, Spike, you don’t have to get all apologetic. You think too much with that soul of yours. I knew exactly what was going on when I agreed to do it.”

Spike put up his hands in defeat. “You know what, forget it.”

“Yeah, let’s.”

“Fine.”

“Fine.”

Caught off guard, Harmony rammed into him. She threw her arms around his neck and crushed her lips to his. Spike quickly pried her away, slamming her into the wall.

“What the bleeding hell are you doing!?” he exclaimed.

Harmony straightened, smoothing her flowered skirt. “Oh, Spikey, I knew you cared. This just proves it.”

“What?”

“You apologized and don’t want to have meaningless sex anymore. I just knew deep down you wanted more.”

“Not from you!”

“But . . . It’s that slayer isn’t it!? You can’t forget her at all.”

Spike shook his head. He headed for the door. He had had enough of this.

*************************

Buffy decided to go see Angel alone. It seemed only right to tell him about the prophecy without company.

She didn’t know what she expected, but this wasn’t it. Wolfram and Hart was packed with both humans and demons. They were all busy, doing their jobs. The place was huge and she had a hard time comprehending that Angel owned it all.

It was impossible to walk right through the door without being intercepted. She had to go through a metal detector and then was bombarded with questions.

“I’m here to see Angel. I’m his . . . “ What was she? “Friend.” That was a simple term, but it still didn’t settle right in her head.

“Name?” the woman asked.

“Buffy Summers.”

“Just a moment, please.”

The woman picked up a phone and pushed a button. After a few seconds she said into the receiver, “Mr. Angel, there is someone here to see you. She says that she is an acquaintance.”

There was a pause. “Buffy Summers.”

The woman nodded. She put down the phone. With a smile she addressed Buffy. “He said to send you right up. Go to second floor. There’s a sign outside his office.”

“Thanks,” Buffy told her.

The slayer found the elevator. She stepped inside and punched the button to go up. Sure enough, it wasn’t hard to find Angel’s door. His name was displayed outside in large, bold letters.

She didn’t feel right barging in, so she politely knocked.

“Who is it?” Angel asked from inside.

“Angel, it’s me,” she answered.

“Buffy.“ Her name was said with yearning. It made her chest ache. “Come in,” he added.

She attentively stepped inside. She closed the door behind her. She stood in place, their eyes meeting. The world seemed to stop spinning. It always seemed like things stood in place whenever she saw him. It was a mixture of goodness and badness all rolled up into one.

Angel recovered first. He gestured to the chair before his desk. “Have a seat.”

“Oh, yeah.” She gave a small smile. She went over and settled into the seat. She shifted, trying to get comfortable.

“I tried to call before coming, but they kept telling me you were busy,” she explained.

Angel folded his arms. “I have a lot of things to take care of.”

“Yeah, I get that. This looks like a pretty important place.”

“It is. It takes a lot of work to keep running.” Angel ran a hand through his gelled hair. “So, how is everybody?”

“Good. Everybody is good. Giles is gathering slayers and rebuilding the watcher’s council. Xander got a new job. Willow. . . Well, Willow broke up with her girlfriend, but she’ll be all right. Faith’s kicking ass and having a blast.”

Nodding, Angel said, “Good. How are you? How was Europe?”

“Lots of things to see. Dawn and I had fun.”

There was a span of silence.

“Um, Buffy. . . Why are you here? Did you come to visit or . . .?”

“Oh!” Buffy held up the scroll Giles had entrusted in her care. “I have this to show you.”

She handed it to him.

He examined it. “What is it?”

“It’s a prophecy about a vampire with a soul. Giles assumed it must be you. It talks about how you’ll save the world and get some shiny reward.”

Angel set the scroll down. He leaned back and frowned.

“Why the broody face? Rewards are good,” Buffy remarked.

Just then the door burst open. A figure clad completely in white came in.

“See what you get when you are all noble,” Spike muttered. “Angel, I’m going to hide in here a bit. You won’t give me an office and I gotta stay somewhere to get away from your love-sick secretary.”

Buffy’s head spun. She jumped to her feet. “Spike.”

Wide green eyes met blue. She felt herself grow dizzy and she would have fallen if she hadn’t grabbed the edge of Angel’s desk.

“How?” she questioned.

Spike opened his mouth to speak.

_________________________________________________

Chapter 5

Buffy thought the world had shifted when she set eyes on Angel. That was nothing compared to what happened when she saw Spike again. The world didn’t change. Instead she saw a whole new world open up for her. Spike was all she saw and all she felt. He filled everything in her and everything around her. He was everything.

It was too much. Her mind was overwhelmed and couldn’t take it. She sunk to her knees.

Stepping forward, Spike glared at his grandsire. He pointed to the distressed slayer. “You weren’t going to tell me she was here,” he accused.

Angel just stared.

Spike went to Buffy’s side. He scooped her up as if she weighed nothing more than a cat. Those arms. So strong and comforting. They were never meant to let go. Hold me forever, Buffy silently pleaded. Never let go again.

There was no temperature in the man that carried Buffy. Still, somehow he managed to fill her with warmth. She sizzled with electricity from their contact.

She was laid down on a couch, barely noticing. Spike tried to straighten, but she wouldn’t let him. Her fingers gripped his arm with slayer strength. She wouldn’t let him go. If he wouldn’t hold her till the end of time, she would him.

Nodding with understanding, Spike knelt beside her. He gave her a genuine smile. The expression was a rarity. He hardly ever lifted his lips in such a manner. Arrogant smirks, yes. Mocking grins, yes. Real smiles, seldom. Buffy felt herself melt.

***********************

Angel watched the pair with disdain. Blond vampire and slayer only had eyes for each other. A giant bubble encased them, separating themselves from everything on the outside.

She used to look at me like that, he thought. He took in an unneeded breath.

“Ah ha, boyfriend!”

“He‘s not. But he is in my heart.”

A vice squeezed Angel’s dead heart. Was he even in her heart anymore? Or was it all taken up by Spike?

He had left her. This was all his doing. But if he knew this was going to happen. . . If she wanted to blow her life on a vampire. . . It should be me, Angel told himself. I’m the one who deserves her. I’m the one who went to hell and back. I’m the champion. I’m not some poser reject got a soul to get into some girl’s pants. I don’t do good for selfish reasons. I want to save the world.

Both of Angel’s hands tightened into fists. He had the urge to rush at Spike and slam one into that bleach-fried head of his.

Angel suddenly realized that there were murmurs. He had been so involved in his thoughts that he missed their conversation. He tuned them in.

“I don’t . . . How?” Buffy whispered. Her green eyes were shimmering. They took Spike in as if he were a dream and she would wake up any moment.

“Long story, pet,” Spike replied. He ran a hand through his slicked back locks.

“You were dead.”

“Still am.” He took her hand and placed it on his still chest.

Buffy sat up a little on the cushions. “You know what I mean.”

Yeh, I do.” There was a pause. “I was dead, yes.”

Buffy closed her eyes for a few seconds and then opened them again. She let out a choked laugh. “Seems like nobody stays dead these days.”

“Should we send an angry letter to the Powers that Be?” Spike suggested.

“No. No. Because . . . Because I’m glad.”

That was it. Those words were all Angel could stand. He couldn’t hear anymore. Another sentence would be his breaking point.

He turned and left the office, slamming the door on his way out.

**********************

Buffy and Spike didn’t even notice Angel’s departure. Not even when the door created a loud bang when it shut.

Stillness surrounded them. Buffy clung to Spike and he was now doing the same to her. She wanted to tell him things. She needed to say so much. But it seemed wrong to disturb the quiet. It felt like if there was a sound this all would be destroyed. It would break their perfect sanitary bubble and let in the dirty germs.

The door opened.

Crash. The bubble wall burst and it all fell away. The coldness seeped in. Buffy tightened her grip on Spike, determined to keep him from drifting away.

Harmony came in with a steaming mug in her hand. “Angel, 98.6 degrees, exactly like you. . .” She frowned at the empty desk. Her gaze traveled over to land on Buffy and Spike.

The secretary gaped at them. Then she crashed the mug of blood down on the surface of Angel’s desk. Red liquid splattered out of the container.

She crossed her arms. “So this is it? This is the reason you broke up with me? Your precious Buffy is back?”

“Harm . . .” Spike began.

Harmony held out her palm in a gesture of silence. “Don’t even start. I know we weren’t really going out. But I wanted to pretend, all right. That’s all I ever wanted. I wanted to pretend you really cared, but you kept making me remember. It isn’t fair!”

“Harmony, I told you. . .”

“I know! It is over. No more sex buddies. I got it.” With that she stormed out.

Silence fell over the office again.

Buffy abruptly let go of Spike. She moved, sitting up.

“You slept with Harmony?” she asked, stolidly.

“Once,” he confessed. “I realize that it was wrong. I needed something to get over the detached feeling of being a ghost.”

Her green eyes widened. “You were a ghost?”

Spike ran a trembling hand through his hair. “Sorta. Not exactly. I was incorporeal.”

Buffy poked him in the side. “You seem fine now.”

“Yeah, got myself a friendly gift that set things to right.”

“So, you were a ghost and had sex with Harmony?” She let out a humorless chuckle. “God. And nobody was going to bother to tell me you were back. I was in Europe trying to forget you, when you were right here. . . ” She gestured around them. “Right here ‘having sex with Harmony’ !”

She knew that she had no justification to give him a lecture. She had used him the same way he used Harmony. Any scolding would be hypocritical.

“Sorry, Buffy, but it isn’t like you have some sort of claim on me.”

Tears sprung to Buffy’s eyes. “I told you I loved you. Isn’t that claim enough?”

“Right, and were you telling the truth?”

She raised her eyes to meet his. “I don’t know. I think so. I wanted it to be true. I thought that maybe when it was all over we might be able to have a chance. I watched you die, though. Goodbye chance.” Buffy paused. “And you don’t know how broken I was to know that. I would never be able to let myself love you. Because you were gone. But now we have a chance. Please, let us have a chance.”

Her little confession had left him speechless. He gazed at her with soulful eyes. She figured there had been enough talk. She grabbed him and pulled him toward her. Their bodies met, smashing together.

Buffy attacked his mouth. She slipped in her tongue, surveying the landscape. She had missed this. There was nothing like the taste of Spike. Blood, alcohol, and cigarettes. Spike batter, beat together and cooked at room temperature. All bad ingredients, but when they combined it turned into something good. Well, ’mostly. Spike wouldn’t be Spike without that pinch of badness.

Buffy wished she had the recipe to bake herself. Oh forget about completing your dough mixture! her mind cried. Right then she felt like Spike was all she needed. He was the chocolate chips. And who really cared about the rest of the cookie anyway?

A moan escaped her throat. They parted and stared.

“What was that?” Spike questioned.

“I’m acting. There’s been enough talk. We can talk later.”

With that she kissed him again.

_________________________________________________________

 

Chapter 6

Angel was brooding. It was a habit he tried desperately to deny. He often told himself that he was only pensive. Deep in thought because he had a lot to think about. In no way was he dwelling over how unfair his life. . . er, unlife had turned out. Hah! For once he had to admit it. He was brooding big time.

Buffy and Spike were in his office. Alone. In ‘his’ office. He had been evicted from his own personal space. Okay, it had been his idea to leave, but still . . . They were intruding.

Who knows what they were doing in there. Angel could guess, though. The reunion he had witnessed had been pretty cuddly. They looked like lovers. Two people deeply in love.

Love.

Angel had known love once. It seemed so long ago. There was an emptiness where it used to burn inside his chest. All that remained was a faint echo from the past. He wondered if he would ever know it again.

No, he decided. Not unless it was her again. Or . . .

Angel abruptly stopped walking. He closed his eyes. The image of another woman popped into his head. He felt guilty for not thinking about her lately. He had been so preoccupied with everything. She was important and he did not want to neglect her. The pain was still fresh. At least with Buffy he had learned to live in their separation. Miles cut them off from each other. Distance made it easier. Cordy . . . She was right there. She was in the same building. And still, she was lost to him. Worse than Buffy. Cordy was there, taunting him, and gone forever at the same time.

He moved against his will. He stepped through the firm, possessed. The door beckoned to him. He reached it, pressing his palm to its smooth wood.

He could feel her. Vampires were able to sense humans. Especially the slayer. She possessed the air of strength and courage. But Cordelia was just a girl. Despite that she was like no other. She was confident and determined. Ready to go to any limit in order to achieve her goal. She was magnificent. As potent as any slayer.

Cordelia wasn’t a substitute for Buff. She was whole new territory. His innocent Buffy had been sunshine and rainbows. He had seen them when they really hadn’t been there at all. She had given him rose-colored glasses. His seer was about discovering light in the darkness. It was about accepting the bad, but not letting it overcome them. They had created something splendid and tangible in the middle of chaos.

Leaning his forehead against the cold door, he came to realize something. Buffy was long over. It had been a fleeting fantasy. Something he would hold dear until the end of time. But that was all it was. She was no longer the glowing, young teen he had fallen for. Even if he Shanshued that very day it would never work out. She had gone through metamorphosis and moved on. She had embraced the truth as well. Their shiny mirage was over.

He would always love Buffy. But she didn’t fit with him anymore.

This notion froze him. He had been holding onto the dream of them for so long. There had always been that tiny flame of hope, no matter how small. Now it flickered and went out.

Angel braced himself. He straightened. He took his hand and gripped the doorknob. It turned easily. Too easily.

There was no stench of sickness in the room. He was thankful for that. He wouldn’t have been able to handle that.

The entire space was white. Still and silent, except for the steady beeping pace of the heart monitor. It was like stepping into another dimension. The outside was harsh and abrasive. This was tranquil and sterile of the ugliness that dwelt behind the walls. It was almost holy. Angelic. Maybe even a piece of heaven.

Staring down at the woman lying in bed, Angel believed it to be fact. This place was sacred.

The infirmary had become his sanctuary. He came there to get away. To rest and regenerate.

Sometimes he could fool himself into feeling love there. But that was impossible. Cordelia was gone. Jasmine had cast her away. Only a shell remained. Or so he hoped. He wished with all his being that she wasn’t locked away, immobile, and confined. Screaming to get out.

No. No, she couldn’t be. She was somewhere else. Somewhere far away. Better.

Angel seated himself in a white chair beside her bed. He scooted closer. With steady fingers, he reached out and took her hand. Warmth swept into him. Her skin was so soft and alive.

Cordelia smelled fresh and in-bloom. Her hair had grown out. It ran past her shoulders now, long and silky. He ordered a change of clothing and bath every day. The ones who carried it out probably thought he was crazy. Catatonic people didn’t need designer clothes and salon shampoo.

Queen C would be proud. She always wanted the best. She deserved the best.

Angel cleared his throat. The action didn’t prevent the catch in his voice.

Cordelia.”

Her name hung in the air. It was whispered, absorbing every syllable.

“Sorry I haven’t been around the past few days.”

He believed that her spirit wasn’t in Wolfram and Hart. That didn’t keep him from talking to her every chance he got. She heard him. Wherever she was, she heard him.

A lots been going on. I’ve had some big cases. Someone planted a robot to impersonate Wesley’s father. Workers were stricken ill. I was lied to about the Shanshu prophecy.” He gritted his teeth. “Spike’s been his usual pain in the ass. And Buffy’s come to see me. But her attention is mostly focused on our dear bleach-wonder.”

He took a deep, useless breath.

Taking her in, he was overwhelmed with awe. God, she was a sight. Some sleeping beauty. She looked like a princess begging to be awakened by a kiss. If only that were true.

Overcome by emotion, he gazed up at the ceiling.

“Oh, Cord, I could use you about now. No, not now. Always. You’re my best friend. More than just that. But you know that already.”

“I can’t help but wonder what things would be like if Jasmine had never entered our lives. Would Conner still hate me? Would we have worked?”

He paused.

“I can’t help but wonder. But it doesn’t change reality, does it?”

Angel bent down. He pressed his cold, dry lips to her hot, moist ones.

“Bye Cordy. I’ll be back sooner than before. I promise.”

He squeezed her hand. For a second he thought he detected movement in her fingers. It must have been his imagination.

The vampire stood up, departing. He left the room, entering the hectic medical ward. Wolfram and Hart orderlies moved about, occupied. He could detect the use of medication being administered in the atmosphere. There was also the strong aroma of sickness. And death. Weaker, but there. It made him nauseous. Which was rare considering his status.

He passed a doctor in a lab coat. She was talking to a colleague, examining a file.

“I’ve never seen anything like this before.” She sounded baffled.

Her companion nodded. “Neither have I. His symptoms don’t connect. Blindness, temporary paralysis, vomiting, seizures, and hearing loss? It makes no sense.”

Angel became alert. This was something he needed to look into.

He stepped over to the doctors. He had made an attempt at getting to know most of the employees at Wolfram and Hart, but he must have overlooked these two.

“Excuse me, uh . . .” He glanced at the female’s nametag. “Miss Winters.”

Kate Winters’s eyes widened. She immediately recognized her boss.

“Oh . . .” She stuck out her hand. “Angel, right? I’m Kate Winters, yes. And this is Robert.”

The male doctor nodded.

Angel shook Kate’s hand.

Gesturing to her papers, he asked, “May I please see the file?”

“Oh, of course.” She handed it over willingly.

He scanned it over.

The patient worked in the mail room. He was young, age twenty-three. He had never been diagnosed with any major illnesses before. His family history showed nothing life-threatening in his genes. His episode had hit suddenly, without any warning at all. He began to go into convulsions. He had never had an epileptic fit before. The shaking had ceased, leaving him partly paralyzed. Then he reported to be gradually going blind. Soon after he no longer could see ‘or’ hear anything.

Angel looked up from the file.

“Did anything unusual happen right before the incident?”

Confused, Kate replied, “No. Why do you ask?”

“This might not be a physical illness.”

“You think it is supernatural?” Robert questioned.

“Yeah, I think it might be.”

“That might explain why his condition doesn’t add up,” Kate agreed. “There was no reports of any weird occurrences. But to be sure maybe it should be looked into.”

“I’m on it,” Angel told her. He held up the file. “May I borrow this?”

Surprised, she blinked. “Yeah. Let me make a copy.”

He handed over the folder. She took it to be photocopied.

After receiving the information, he proceeded out of med-lab. A stab of foreboding washed over him. Something was coming.

________________________________________________

Chapter 7

Angel hesitantly entered his office. He was afraid he would walk in on a Buffy and Spike make-out session. Which would be considered his version of hell. Despite his little epiphany before, it didn’t change the fact that he wanted the best for Buffy. He still cared about her and thought that Spike was definitely a bad choice. Any road traveled with his grandchilde led to a dark place.

There was no graphic activity in the room. To his relief they were sitting calmly on the couch. Buffy’s hand was in Spike’s, however, making him grit his teeth. She abruptly detached from the bleach-blonde, and stood up. Spike raised an eyebrow in question. They locked eyes, speaking silently to each other.

Angel was unnerved. How could they have such a connection? Buffy and Spike were nothing alike. They couldn’t possibly fit the way they appeared to. At least . . . And then it hit him. He didn’t know Buffy at all anymore.

That’s all he needed. Another reason why Buffy and he would never work out even if they wanted to.

The slayer made her way up to her ex. “Angel, I need to say some stuff. Before, about that cookie dough speech. I was wrong. I’m not done baking, but . . .” Her expression showed how sorry she was. “You see, I didn’t realize that certain people shape who you are. And Spike . . . He . . . “

That was as far as Angel let her get.

“Buffy,” Angel harshly interrupted.

She instantly shut up, startled.

“I can’t talk to you right now. Please leave.” He said it coolly, trying to control himself.

“Angel. . .” Her voice was broken. She was obviously hurt. “I need to get this out.”

“Later,” Angel told her. “Right now I need you gone.” He glanced over at Spike, who was listening to them only a few feet away. “Take Spike with you.”

She nodded.

He watched as Buffy gathered Spike. They were almost out the door when Buffy looked back. “Bye, Angel,” she whispered.

Then they were gone.

Angel shut the door and collapsed in his chair. He put his face in his hands, struggling to block out the world.

***********************

Spike had been out of the law firm since coming back from the dead. But now, leaving with Buffy, it felt like he was finally breaking free.

They rode in a cab to her hotel. It wasn’t a ritzy place, but it wasn’t that bad either. They had a pool, cable, and air conditioning. Everything you basically needed for a comfortable stay. He imagined Rupert had been the one to finance the trip. There was no way Buffy could pay for a stay like this.

Buffy led him through the hotel. They took the stairs instead of the elevator to third floor. Identical doors loomed past them as they moved. Suddenly, Buffy stopped in front of 317.

She fumbled in her purse for the lock-card.

“It would be best for me to wait out here,” Spike voiced.

In disbelief, Buffy turned toward him. “Huh?”

“I mean . . .” He ran a hand through his hair. “It would be best not to give the bit a scare.”

“And Willow. She came with us, and should be watching Dawn,” Buffy added. She nodded. “Okay. Wait here. I’ll come get you in a few.”

She disappeared into the room, leaving him out in the hall. He leaned against the wall, desperately wishing he had a cigarette.

What was happening here? He gazed up at the ceiling, as if it would offer an answer.

**********************

The room was quiet and dark.

Willow and Dawn couldn’t possibly be asleep. It was definitely no later than eight o’clock.

“Will? Dawn?”

Buffy flipped on the light. She surveyed her surroundings. The twin beds were neat and untouched. She spotted a white piece of paper on the table.

Buff,

You’ve been gone a few hours now. We aren’t quite sure when to expect you back, so we decided not to wait up. We went to catch a late movie Dawn is just dying to see.

We’ll talk later, cause I know you are going to need some support after all the Angel-Angst.

Lots of X’s, without the O’s (poor us),

Willow

Buffy smiled. Well, Willow may be in a slump without any smoothies, but Buffy had gotten her fair share. And seeing as they had the entire room to themselves, there was a good possibility she would get some more.

Lying the note back down, she headed over to the door. She peeked her head out.

“Spike,” she called.

The vampire came into view. She was again overwhelmed by how much she had missed him. His mere presence had totally flip-flopped her psyche. She had never been so excited about the future before. And to think a few days ago she was practically breaking apart in front of her sister.

Willow and Dawn went out. So, it is the all clear.”

“Right then,” Spike replied. He stepped inside.

Without speaking, the two sat down on a bed. They were close, but didn’t touch.

“Buffy . . .” Spike began.

She raised her head. “Spike . . .”

They reached for each other. Their mouths crashed together. Hands explored all over. When Buffy started to undo Spike’s pants, he had to stop her.

“Wait,” he panted. “We need to stop.”

Buffy pulled away, her face flushed.

Spike righted his white jeans. “We have to talk.”

“You’re right,” she agreed. “Do you want to start? Or shall I?”

“I wasn’t going to contact you,” Spike blurted.

Her eyes widened. She gaped.

“I was going to leave you be. Let you have your 2.5 children and all. Seemed the right thing to do.”

“Spike . . .”

“I wanted to find you. I wanted to believe what you said was real. I wanted to get out of that hell-hole the poof is running and find my piece of heaven. But you deserve better.”

“Okay, now I think you’ve been hanging around Angel too much!” Buffy was mad. No, furious. How dare he! How dare he fight for her for years and then choose to be all noble when she decided to surrender. How dare he!

Spike took in a deep breath. “When you were the slayer we might have had a go at it. But now you can be just a girl. Isn‘t that what you‘ve always wanted?”

Buffy felt her fire grow larger. “Okay, I’m sick of people acting like they know what I need and want. First of all, I’ll always be the slayer. It is a part of me. So, that means I’m not your average girl. Never was, never will be. And even if I were, I don’t think I’d want it. It’s nice to have a break, yes, but I need to get my energy out once in a while.”

“All I do is bollocks up your life, Buffy.”

Erg, she wanted to punch him in the nose. She clenched her hand into a fist instead.

“Is this your soul talking?” Buffy questioned. “Because if it is I think I’d prefer to have a conversation with your demon.”

Life sparked in Spike’s eyes. “The demon is a right selfish git.”

Buffy took a moment to think. Then she cupped his chin. “Spike- William, you’ve told me what you feel is the right thing to do. Now tell me what you want to do. Right now. At this very moment.”

He drew back, searching her face. “I want . . . I want to feel you.”

She took his hand and placed it on her covered breast.

“Like that?”

He shook his head. “I want to feel your skin.”

She slid his hand under her shirt. She wasn’t wearing a bra and she wasn’t embarrassed about it either.

He indrew an involuntary breath.

“Like that?”

He nodded.

“Spike, now ask me what I want,” she commanded.

Spike pulled his hand away. “Buffy . . .”

Frustrated, she said,” Spike, I think I was falling in love with you before. And I didn’t tell you I loved you because you were dying. I told you it because I thought it would save you. I might still have been falling, Spike, but I know in time I would have hit the bottom.”

“Slayer . . .”

There he was. There was her demon.

Buffy leaned closer. “You’ve been battling for me for years now. I think it’s my turn. Give in, Spike. You know you want to dance.”

His lips twitched. She was close.

“Now, ask me what ‘I’ want.”

“What do you want, Buffy?”

She answered in a barely audible, husky murmur. “I want you. I want all of you as I take the final plunge and hit the bottom. I want to take my chances crashing into the sharp rocks below. Give in Spike.”

A smirk formed on his lips. “I should make you wait three years.”

Without warning, he slammed her against the mattress. “But that would be torture for the both of us.”

She let out a moan as he massaged her breasts through her sweater.

“I thought you wanted to feel my skin,” she got out.

“I do.”

His touch roamed up her bare belly. It was cold against her raging heat. Ah, so good.

The door banged open.

“I can’t believe he didn’t marry her,” came a familiar voice.

“Not every story has a happy ending, Dawn. Sometimes the couple doesn’t end up together. They go their separate ways or one of them dies,” Willow expressed.

The slayer and vampire on the bed froze.

“Or. . . Sometimes they do,” Willow added with wide eyes.

Buffy blushed. “Hey, guys.”

______________________________________________

Chapter 8

Buffy sat up, smoothing down her rumpled blue sweater. She exchanged a look with Spike, who flashed her a smirk.

Willow stepped further into the room. She blinked, processing the couple on the bed. “Normally I would ask if I should leave. But I can’t. Cuz ‘hello’ that is Spike.” She pointed to the bleach-blonde. “Supposedly ‘dead’ Spike.”

“Um . . .” Buffy bit her lip. “We can explain.”

Ya see . . .” Spike began, but didn’t know where to start.

“He’s back,” Buffy continued. “He showed up at Wolfram and Hart.”

“Came out of that blasted amulet of Angel’s. Was all ghosty, but now I’m a real boy again,” he finished.

Gaping, Willow shook her head. “Wow. Um . . .” Her expression transformed into a smile. “It’s good to see you again, Spike.”

“Thanks, Red. It‘s good to be seen.”

There was a moment of silence. No one moved. Buffy noticed how frightened her sister looked.

Dawnie?” Buffy asked in concern.

The teen’s head shot up, startled. She backed up until she hit the wall. She closed her eyes. After a moment she opened them again. Her breath caught.

“Sp-Spike, you’re. . . Are you real?”

Spike stood up. He took a tentative step toward her. Nibblet?”

A sob escaped Dawn. She rushed at him, arms flying. She hit him full-force, embracing him harshly. He held her back, stroking her silky hair.

“I’m so sorry,” she cried. She repeated the apology over and over.

Spike’s hand stilled. He met Buffy’s gaze with puzzlement. She mouthed, ’Fire’ and ‘bed.’ Suddenly he understood.

“Aw, Dawn, I’m not sore about the fire bit. You had a right to be angry.”

She lifted her head, wetness streaming down her cheeks. “I didn’t mean it,“ she choked. “I’d never really hurt you.“ The vampire reached out and brushed the tears away. He gave her a loving smile.

All of a sudden Dawn burst out laughing. She tightened her hold. “We missed you.”

“Missed my girls as well.” Spike glanced at Buffy as he said this. He held out a welcoming hand. The slayer came forward, joining the group hug.

Willow watched the threesome, soaking up the sweet scene. She quietly left, heading for her own room.

***********************

“So, after the grand poof himself very graciously asked us to push off, your big sis invited me to accompany her here so we could talk,” Spike finished.

Dawn fought rolling her eyes. Yeah right, she thought. Talk. Inwardly she laughed. That was no conversation Willow and I walked in on.

“Well, I’m glad Giles found that prophecy. Otherwise we never would have came to LA.”

Spike lifted an eyebrow. “What is this prophecy?”

Just then Buffy came out of the bathroom. She ran her fingers through her golden locks and let out a yawn.

Dawn shrugged. “Buffy knows more than I do.”

“Is that right?” Spike’s attention shifted to land on the slayer.

“Huh? What?” Buffy inquired.

“This prophecy. What is it?”

“Oh.” Buffy let out another yawn. “Just some prophecy about Angel getting a reward. Some ’light shining from above’. Something like that.

Spike shot to his feet. He began to pace the room. “I can’t believe this!”

“Huh?” Buffy sounded very confused.

Spike stopped. He gestured with his hands as he spoke. “He already has ‘one’ prophecy. He doesn’t need another bloody one too!” He put his hand up to his heart. “And what about me? I’m the one who went and got a soul willingly. Hey, who’s to say these destiny texts aren’t about me?”

Buffy pondered that for a minute. She frowned. “They could be,” she said slowly. “Giles immediately concluded it had to be about Angel because you were . . . gone.”

“Ah hah! Angel acts all high and mighty, thinking he is the chosen one. When all along I could be the one to get the beating heart.”

“What?” Dawn squeaked.

“Whoa, wait. Beating heart? Human?” Buffy got in.

Spike nodded. “The Shanshu prophecy. A vampire with a soul will do some brilliant deed and be rewarded with humanity.”

Buffy’s head reeled. The thought of Angel or Spike becoming human was a lot to take in. Buffy teetered. Her hand shot out and met the wall for support.

Dawn jumped up. “Buffy!?”

The world spun. Buffy opened and closed her eyes a few times, trying to focus.

Spike came forward and swooped her up. He brought Buffy over to the bed and laid her down. He ran a hand over her, looking for anything to indicate the unexpected dizziness.

“What is the matter, luv?” Spike asked.

“I - I don’t know. I suddenly felt strange.” She swallowed. “I feel better now.”

He stared at her for awhile. Then he said, “Rest.”

She nodded, scooting over. “Join me?”

He climbed in under the sheets. She spooned herself against his body, wanting as much contact as possible.

“I’m gonna . . .” Dawn pointed to the door. “Willow and I saw this witch documentary advertised. I think it’s on now.”

Spike nodded, giving her a thankful smile. He knew what she was up to and was grateful for it. He put his head down after Dawn left, listening to an already slumbering Buffy breath.

*********************

A couple hours later Spike awoke. He felt the slayer stir.

“Buffy?”

She clutched onto him. “Oh God!” she exclaimed.

“What is it?”

Buffy buried her face in his chest. “Oh God,” she mumbled. “I dreamt. . .” Her voice caught.

He kissed the top of her head. “It’s okay, Buffy. I’m here.”

“Don’t leave me.” She looked up at him. The room was dark, but with his vampiric sight he could see the pleading in her eyes. “Never leave me.”

“Buffy . . .” He sighed. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Buffy glanced over at the other bed. It was untouched, perfectly made. “Where’s Dawn?”

“She went over to see Willow. Gave some rot about a show they were gonna watch.”

“Oh.”

Their eyes met.

“Spike.” His name came out breathily. She trailed her fingers down his shirt.

Sitting up a little, he grabbed her roaming hand. “This might not be a wise idea. We don’t know what made you dizzy. Are you sure you’re all right?”

“I’m fine,” she assured him. “I think I was just tired.”

“Buff-”

She silenced him with her soft lips. She tugged on his white t-shirt. He couldn’t help but let out a moan. All thoughts of Buffy’s ’almost fainting spell’ left him.

*************************

Angel reread the paragraph again. It didn’t help. He couldn’t get the words to sink in. Frustrated, he shoved the file away.

He leaned back, rubbing his temples. He couldn’t concentrate. Images of Buffy and Spike kept running through his head. That epiphany before didn’t seem to be helping the situation any. He still wanted Buffy. And he definitely couldn’t stand to think of her choosing Spike over him.

Maybe he should call it a night and go to bed. If he could bring himself to sleep that is.

A ring jolted him from his thoughts. He grabbed the phone and put the receiver to his ear.

“Angel speaking.”

“Hello, this is Kate from the infirmary ward.”

Angel straightened. “Yes, Kate. How can I help you?”

“That patient you were curious about. . . Well, he . . . died twenty minutes ago.”

Angel took in a long breath. “I see.”

“He fell into a coma earlier today. Then his heart simply stopped. We tried to revive him but nothing worked.”

“I understand, Kate. Thank you for informing me. I suggest sending the body to the lab for a dissection.”

“All right.”

“Is that all, Kate?”

“Not quite.” The doctor paused. “That woman you came to see earlier. . .”

Angel froze. He clutched the phone tighter. “What about her?”

Oh God, Cordy, he thought with fright. He didn’t know if he could handle her death right now.

“She’s . . . Well, she’s awake.”

Angel bolted out of his chair. “I’ll be right there.”

Without waiting for a reply, Angel slammed the phone down. He hurried out of his office without hesitating for a second.

____________________________________________________

Chapter 9

Resembling a wild mad man, Angel made his way through Wolfram and Hart. He didn’t slow down until he saw Kate. She stood outside Cordelia’s room, jotting down a few things. She glanced up at him when she heard him approach.

“How is she?” Angel asked.

“She’s fine. A little confused, but that is to be expected. Would you like to see her?”

Why else would he come down here?

“Yes,” he answered.

“Don’t overwhelm her,” the doctor advised.

He nodded, reaching to open the door. The first thing that hit him was the smell of Cordy. Her scent had always been there when he visited, but it was accompanied with the stench that only a hospital could produce. That medicine aroma that made a person shiver involuntarily. That was gone now, and the whole room was filled with the rich perfume of flowers.

His eyes landed on the bed, where she sat. She was very still, and was staring straight at him, but didn’t seem to notice his presence. He felt his chest tighten. The doctor said she was all right. She didn’t look all right. She looked catatonic, although with her eyes open.

Angel slowly moved to her side. He took a hand and laid it on her bare arm. Cordelia?”

And then she came out of her little world. She blinked, and then gradually brought her head around to face him. Her voice came out low and hoarse,” Angel?”

A giant grin spread across his features. “Yeah.” He hugged her. “Oh, Cordy, we were afraid you would never wake up.”

She didn’t respond, and he grew worried. Something wasn’t right here. He pulled back. He saw the despair seeping out of her.

“Is there something wrong?”

Cordelia put her face in her hands. She was silent for a long time. Angel watched her, at a loss with what to do.

Finally, she lifted her head. She met his dark eyes. “It’s started,” she told him.

***********************

Wolfram and Hart was at rest, but if it had been during the day there would have been a mass of activity. Fred hurriedly walked down the hall, searching for her friends. They were practically the only ones who stayed for late hours, except for the essential staff in the medical department.

She finally bumped into Gunn. He was coming out of his office, straightening his tie.

“Hey, Fred,” he greeted. “I was just heading home.”

“Charles, I don’t think you should be leaving just yet. H-Have you seen the news?” the scientist commented.

“No, why?”

Fred grabbed his arm and pulled him back into his office. She went over to the television that was imbedded into the wall. She flipped through the channels, showing him how every single one displayed the ‘Breaking News’.

She pointed to the screen. “That’s why.”

The news was talking about a huge blizzard. Then he caught the location.

Africa.

“What?” Gunn mumbled.

“Yes, Africa. The world seems to be shifting on its axis here. There are volcanoes erupting in Hawaii, a plague in South America, hurricanes in China, and earthquakes in England.” She shook her head. “I think this is treading on apocalyptic paradoxical occurrences.”

Gunn gaped at the TV. He watched footage displaying some sick children in Brazil.

“Uh . . . Yeah.”

*************************

“I think it is safe for you to go back now, Dawnie,” Willow told the brunette.

“You’re probably right. But I don’t want to walk in on something gross.”

Willow laughed. “That’s what knocking is for.”

“Oh, yeah.”

“Here, I’ll go with you.”

The two exited the hotel room. They were almost to the room Buffy and Spike were in when the door shot open. Spike came out, carrying an unconscious Buffy.

“Oh my God!” Willow exclaimed.

Spike raised his head, startled. “She won’t wake up!” He was in a fluster, lost and scared.

“All right,” Willow said. “Put her down.”

“What?”

“Put her down on the floor.”

Spike seemed doubtful, but complied. With great care, he laid his love down on the blue carpet. Dawn hovered over them, hugging herself.

Willow knelt by the slayer. She placed her hands on both sides of Buffy’s head. She concentrated. After a few minutes, she took her hands off. She looked up at Spike and Dawn.

“It isn’t something physical. It’s paranormal.”

“A spell?” Dawn asked.

“N-No. Something . . .” Willow glanced back at Buffy. “. . . else. I can’t quite pinpoint exactly what the source is. All I got was a sense of darkness. Like something wanted to consume her from the inside out.”

Okay, that was it. Spike couldn’t hear anymore. He took action, hoisting Buffy back into his arms.

“We have to get her to the hospital,” he announced.

“They won’t know what to do,” Dawn stated. “Willow said it was mystical.”

“Not the public hospital, bit. The Wolfram and Hart hospital.”

__________________________________________________

 

Chapter 10

Cordelia perked up. She swung her legs over the side of the metal bed. On shaky legs, she made her way to the door.

“What’s started? Cordelia?” Angel asked.

She didn’t answer. Instead, ignoring his inquisition, she headed out into the hall. The sound of desperate shouting filled the air.

“Hullo, I have a girl ‘ere who needs help!”

The dark-haired vampire came up behind the seer. They watched as Spike entered the hall, carrying the small form of Buffy. After a few seconds, Dawn and Willow followed.

Angel took a step forward. “Buffy? What’s wrong with her?”

Spike shook his head. “Don’t know. She won’t wake up.” The blonde glanced around, distracted. “Is there anyone here?”

Footsteps approached. The next thing they knew Kate came into view. She rushed into action, instructing for Spike to follow her into an examining room.

Tears streamed down Dawn’s face as she saw her sister get taken away. Willow put a comforting arm around her. The teen leaned into the witch for support.

“She’s going to be all right. She’s Buffy,” Dawn said, trying to convince herself. “Slayers have super-healing powers.”

Willow glanced over. She gasped. “Cordy? I didn‘t know you were here.”

Cordelia’s eyes widened. “H-Hi, Willow.”

All attention fell on the newly awakened patient. She ran a hand through her hair. Geez, staring much. Am I a mess or something?”

The comment filled Angel with relief. Now that was the Cordelia he knew.

“You look fine,” Willow stated. She looked over at Angel for an explanation.

“She just woke up,” he said. “From a coma.”

All of a sudden Fred and Gunn came running at them. They slowed, catching their breath.

“Angel, we’ve been searching for you. We’ve got a problem,” Gunn got out.

Everything was overwhelming Angel. He felt like he might pass out if things didn’t stop to give him a breather. Which was ridiculous for two reasons. One, vampires don’t faint. Two, vampires don’t breath.

Cordelia!” Fred shrieked. She rammed into her friend, giving her a hug. Hesitantly, Cordelia reciprocated the act.

“Whoa, Cordy!” Gunn exclaimed, noticing the reanimated woman as well.

“Fred. . .” Cordy began. “Can I have some air?”

Fred backed up. “Oh-Sure. Sorry.”

Cordelia’s eyes swept over everyone. She swayed a little, which caused Angel to reach out and grab her.

“Are you okay?” Angel questioned.

Cordelia looked up at him. Her eyes swam with agony. “No.” She shook her head. “I can’t . . . There’s so many images.”

“Visions?”

She winced. “I can feel them. Everyone. The whole world is crumbling.”

Angel parted his lips.

“I think she’s on the right wavelength, Angel. Fred and I just watched the news.” Gunn pointed behind him. “It’s chaos out there. Natural disasters. . . But not so natural. Meteors. Mysterious illnesses.”

“Mysterious illness?” Willow muttered.

Gunn turned. “Yeah.”

“Oh, God, Buffy!”

Cordelia started to tremble. Angel swooped her up. “Come on, I’m going to take you somewhere you can rest,” he told her. Then he addressed the others. “I’ll be back.”

He took her to his office. It was refreshing to see it empty and silent. The couch awaited them, and he lay her gingerly down. She gazed up with glazed eyes.

“I don’t know what to do. They need me to do something,” she choked.

Stroking back her hair, he soothingly replied. “Are the powers sending you visions?”

She nodded. “It’s never been like this before. They came right before I woke up. I. . .” She paused to take in a deep breath. “I can’t even sort them out.”

He leaned down and pressed his lips to her forehead. “It’ll be all right. Just rest.”

It seemed like she might protest, but after a moment she complied. She sighed, shutting her eyes and sinking into the cushions.

***********************

The examination was inconclusive. There was nothing found to indicate that the slayer should be sick. Spike staid by her side for hours, set on being there for her every second.

“Do you need something to eat?” Dawn asked the next morning.

“Thanks, platelet, but I’m fine. You go get yourself something tasty, though,” he said, brushing the offer aside.

“But . . .” She sighed. “All right.”

Dawn left, and Spike found himself alone with Buffy. He watched her, paying close attention to the rise and fall of her chest. There was a heart monitor hooked up, giving off steady beeping noises, but actually seeing air pass through her lungs was more reassuring.

Spike took Buffy’s hand. He rubbed his thumb across her soft skin.

“Okay, pet, I’m not gonna let you do this,” he firmly said. “The two of us agreed to have ourselves a go only last night. Wouldn’t be right for you to back out.”

Against his will Spike drifted off, still clinging to his slayer’s hand. Awhile later he was jarred awake by a twitch. His head jolted up.

“Spike?” The voice was groggy.

“Buffy?”

Her eyes fluttered half-way open. He laughed, bringing her hand up to kiss it.

“Hey there, cutie,” he voiced.

She gave him her best attempt at a smile.

“Should I get the doc?”

“No.”

Her words were so soft, as if she could hardly find the strength to get them out. If it wasn’t for his vampiric hearing he might not have been able to catch them.

“I think they should know you’re awake, luv,” Spike advised.

“No.” She squeezed his fingers. “I wanna spend time with just you.”

He relaxed in his seat.

“Buffy, how do you feel? The docs have no idea what is making you sick. If you know anything -”

She shook her head. “It feels like I’m being swallowed.”

Widening his blue eyes, he said, “What?”

She closed her eyes. “Yeah. Strange, huh?”

“Angel’s crew think you might be tied in with some apocalyptic happenings.”

She let out a sound that he detected as laughter. “Darn apocalypses.”

“Don’t worry. We’ll fix it. It’s what we white hats do. Then everything will be right as rain, and you’ll be good as new.”

“I really think the docs should be fetched.” He began to get up. She tugged him back.

“Spike!” Her eyes opened.

Spike froze. Shhh. What is it, luv?”

“There’s something I need to say.”

“All ears, slayer.”

“I’ve figured it out.”

“Bout what?”

“You.”

He raised his left eyebrow. “Me?”

“Yeah. And me. Us.”

“Really? And what final conclusion did you come up with?”

“That I’m in love with you,” she murmured.

His lips rose. “That so? That’s mighty convenient considering I’m in love with you.”

She weakly smiled back. “Kiss me and then I’ll let you go get the doctor.”

Spike lowered his mouth down to hers. They touched with warmth, savoring the merging of their tongues. After a long while, they reluctantly separated.

“Be right back,” Spike told her.

He turned, prepared to exit the room. He wasn’t really surprised to find his grandsire standing in the open doorway.

“Why hullo there, peaches, enjoy the show?”

Angel scowled.

A smirk formed on Spike’s face. He pushed his way past the other vamp. It wasn’t difficult for him to find a doctor. When he brought the man back, however, Buffy had been pulled back into unconsciousness.

************************

“Spike, can I have a moment?”

Spike looked over with red eyes. He nodded, not in the mood to banter. He ventured out into the hall. He leaned against the doorframe to Buffy’s room.

“Have on with it,” Spike said.

“Eve contacted the senior partners.”

“Really? What did the wankers have to say?”

There was a span of silence. “They think it has to do with the both of us,” Angel eventually said.

“Right,” Spike drolled. “I don’t know about you, mate, but I haven’t been going around giving myself a tickle by creating massive destruction.”

“They think it’s the soul issue,” Angel deadpanned.

Spike’s jaw twitched. He took a moment to glance at the motionless Buffy through the open door.

“You really think we did that to her?”

Angel ran a hand through his gelled locks. “I don’t know.”

“Is there a way to fix it?”

“The senior partners are working on it.”

Spike hit the back of his head against the wall. “Call them back up and tell them to bloody hurry it along, will ya.” His hands formed into fists. “Because if anything happens to my girl there’s going to be blood shed. More than any Armageddon could dish out.”

________________________________________________

Chapter 11

The world stopped at a little past eight AM.

The shrill constant beep exploded in their ears.

And they watched.

The defibrillator jolted Buffy’s body as electric currents swept through her.

“Clear!”

“Time?”

“Two minutes, fifty-one seconds.”

Two minutes and fifty-one seconds of oblivion.

“Up twenty. . . Clear!”

Spike couldn’t see. There was only darkness. A frigid blanket had draped itself over him. And his ears had gone deaf. There was nothing.

He didn’t hear the catch in the flat line. The long drone came back, but there had been a pause.

“Again.”

The paddles shot energy into the slayer. She jerked off the bed.

“Clear.”

Over and over. It never seemed to end.

And then. . .

“We have a pulse!”

Four minutes, fifteen seconds. Four minutes and fifteen seconds after the world stopped it started again.

Dawn shook her favorite vampire. He looked like a zombie, which wasn’t far off, but very disturbing.

“Spike?”

He made no response.

“Spike? Did you hear? They have a pulse. Buffy’s back.”

Everything came rushing back. His vision cleared, his ears filtered in the sound waves, and the blanket lifted.

Spike sunk to his knees. Dawn came down with him and wrapped her arms around him.

Spike, William the Bloody, slayer of slayers, cried in the embrace of a sixteen year-old.

**********************

Spike sat on the floor outside his love’s door. He couldn’t bring himself to go inside yet. He was still recovering from almost losing her.

“So, I hear you’re a good guy now. How‘s that going for you?”

He rose his blue eyes to land on Cordelia. She came over and sat down beside him.

Mmm, for being carpet it’s pretty comfy.”

Spike stared down at his hands. “So, I hear you’re all with the visions. How’s that going for you?”

She shrugged. “You’d think being half demon it’d be a piece of cake.”

He rose an eyebrow at that.

“Don’t ask. Yeah, half demon here. The migraines are gone, but that doesn’t mean I welcome them.”

He offered a nod.

“I’ve been getting a lot since waking up. They were a jumbled mess at first, but now they’re more clear. Still not a picnic.”

His blue eyes met her brown ones. They were filled with plead. “Any that might help Buffy?”

“One thing about the damned PTBs, they love to show what is wrong, but they’re not big on giving solutions.” She let out a humorless laugh. “It is so uncool how we have to clean up their mess.”

They sat together in silence.

************************

Spike didn’t bother to knock. He burst into Angel’s office, making the other vampire lift his head from his hands.

“Any news from the senior blokes?” Spike asked.

Angel straightened. “No.”

“Right then.”

The blonde reached into his duster pocket. When his hand emerged it held a wooden stake.

“I’ve been thinking. . .”

“Never a good thing, William,” Angel commented.

His grandchilde was about to make a comeback, but stopped himself. He fumbled with the stake.

“There are the two of us.” Spike gestured between them. “And there should only be just the one. So, if one of us was eliminated. . .”

A frown spread across Angel‘s face. “What are you getting at?”

Spike handed over the stake. He gripped the edge of the desk and leaned slightly forward. “I’m askin you to kill me.”

Angel should have jumped at the chance. It was his opportunity to be rid of the annoying bleach-wonder. Instead he set the stake down. Then he looked up.

Calmly, Angel said, “No.”

“What!?” Spike let go of the desk. “I’m askin you to off me. It’s your biggest dream. Think about it. You’ll be the only candidate for that Shanshu prophecy. And Buffy’ll need someone.”

“Why are you doing this, Spike?”

“Because it’s the only way! I just overheard some docs discussing Buffy’s condition. There is nothin they can do for her.” Spike let out a long breath. “And it isn’t only her, although she’s a large chunk of it. I’ve been thinkin about the other billion people outside the window. So, I’m askin again, ‘Kill me?’.

A few seconds passed. “No,” Angel answered.

Spike hit his fist down on the top of the desk. He growled. He snatched up the stake.

“Fine, I’ll do it myself!”

He began to stalk out of the room, prepared to find a private place for his end. He was halted by Angel. The elder vampire slammed him against the door.

“Can’t let you do it, Spike,” Angel said, slipping into game face.

“And why the bleeding hell not!?” Spike shouted.

“Because she loves you.” Angel’s features shifted back to human. He took in a deep breath. “Because she loves ‘you’.”

Angel released Spike. He took a step back. With steady hands, he began to unbutton his dark shirt. Then he offered his bare chest.

“Do it.”

Spike gawked in surprise. But he didn’t move.

“Do it!” Angel repeated.

Spike raised the weapon.

“I never liked you much, Angel. But I. . . I never hated you. Sometimes I even admired you. Kinda like right now.”

“Spike. . . Take care of her.”

“Course.”

And with that, Spike aimed. He thrust the stake, hitting its target swift and true. Angel only had time to enlarge his eyes and open his mouth before disintegrating. The stake fell from Spike’s hands, landing next to the pile of dust on the floor.

______________________________________________________

Epilogue

Spike and Buffy were huddled together on the hospital bed. The slayer’s head rested on his still chest, while his fingers streamed through her hair. They both were silent, staring across the room at nothing.

The tears had already came and went, and Buffy couldn’t bring herself to find anymore. Numbness had set in. She couldn’t believe he was gone. A world without Angel seemed like a scary world indeed.

“Do you need anything, luv?”

The words felt like ice. After such a long span of quiet it didn’t hit well.

She shook her head.

It wasn’t long before there was a knock at the door.

“Come in,” Spike called.

The door opened and Cordelia slowly entered. She gave them both a smile. It wasn’t a bright one, but it wasn’t sad either.

“I had a vision,” she announced.

Spike shut his eyes. He wasn’t ready to go off and play champion just yet.

“It was of Angel.”

He felt Buffy sit up. “What?”

Cordy’s eyes shimmered. Her smile wobbled. “He’s happy.”

“Happy,” Buffy repeated. Then a smile tugged at her lips.

“He will face the coming darkness, sacrifice himself for the greater good, and receive a reward.” A tear escaped Buffy’s eye. She quickly brushed it away. “Light from above. Heaven. He’s finally done.”

Spike brought her closer and rested his chin on the top of her head.

“Thanks, Cordelia,” he said to the seer.

*************************

Angel had been carrying around torment for so long he had forgotten what it was like to be free of it. For years he had only known darkness, desperately seeking the light. And now he had finally found it.

His journey was finished. He was complete. And he was forgiven.

________________________________________________

The End.

 


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