It was 5 p.m. eastern standard time when Jennifer finally arrived at her apartment in New York. She went through the day in a daze. She tried to tell herself it was the lack of sleep but the truth was evident by the shattered pieces of her heart. Feeling overwhelmed by the shear intensity of her emotions, Jennifer went straight to bed. Perhaps in sleep she could find some relief from the pain.
"Here it is, the Jonathan Hart story." Jennifer said throwing the package on Patricia’s desk the next morning.
"So, how’d it go?" Patricia asked looking up at Jennifer from behind her desk.
"What?"
"The interview? Jonathan Hart? You know," Patricia said annoyed that Jennifer would play coy.
"It was nice," Jennifer said putting on her professional mask.
"Nice? Children are nice. Jonathan Hart is .... Well I don’t know but nice is not the word."
Handsome, kind, sexy, gentle, exciting.... Were the words that flashed in Jennifer’s mind.
"Are you okay?" Patricia asked coming around her desk.
"Yes, sure, why?"
"You seem really distracted. Did something happen?"
"Ah, no. Jet lag I guess. Here’s the story. Where are my tickets?"
Pat frowned not satisfied with Jennifer explanation. "I was able to get tickets from Paris to Nairobi and back. You have to get to Paris and from there to New York. However, the earliest I could get were for the 21st… two weeks from this Friday."
"Okay."
"And maybe so the accountants don’t get upset, you could come back with some sort of feature on lions or something." Patricia studied Jennifer. Something just didn’t seem right. "Jennifer? Are you sure you’re okay?"
"I’m fine, just tired."
Patricia didn’t believe her but knew better than push her. "Well, if you change your mind and want to talk, I’m here for you."
Jennifer mustered a smile. "Thanks. I’ll keep that in mind."
"Good. Why don’t you go to Madame Dupre’s and pamper yourself. You look like you could use it."
Jennifer nodded. "Actually, since I have some time before heading to Africa, I think I might start working on that proposal for my new book." Jennifer wanted to work on something to keep her mind busy and focused away from Jonathan Hart.
Jonathan pulled the article out from the manila envelope Jennifer gave him in the evening three days ago.
It is not every day that a brush with the law and the kindness of a stranger changes a man’s life, but in the case of Jonathan Hart, that is just what happened
He set the article on the table and rubbed his eyes.
"You okay Mr. H.?"
"Yeah Max, just a little tired." Max came and sat at the table with Jonathan.
"Big poker game is tonight. Did you forget?"
"Ah, no. No Max I didn’t."
"It’s here. You want I should cancel it? You don’t’ look so good if you don’t mind my saying so."
"No Max." Jonathan sat back, straightening his tie. "Poker is on for tonight." Max watched Jonathan leave the room wondering what he could possibly do to help, and fearing there was absolutely nothing.
Jonathan sat at the table with his buddies of many years. They came from many walks of life, business, government, and even professional sports. Some were married, happily although they teasingly complained. For several years now, these men had been more than just poker buddies. They had all been friends, consultants and even confidants. But as close as he was to these men, Jonathan couldn’t get his mind on the game. Jennifer. She was everywhere. Her scent lingered on him. His lips retained the taste of her. His hands still burned from the feel of her. Everywhere he looked he saw signs of her. He couldn’t escape her.
"Jonathan. When do you plan to join the game?" Sam asked when Jonathan folded as he’d done with all his previous hands.
Mustering a smile he said, "Haven’t caught a break yet."
"Can’t con a con, Jonathan." Mack said. "You’re in a bad way. Did that reporter broad write something unflattering?"
"No, nothing like that."
"I don’t think we’ve ever seen you like this. I guess it’s our one chance to take some of those millions you are hoarding." Jack said.
"Whose deal?" Max asked trying to move the conversation away from Jonathan.
"Looks like we could use more beer," Jonathan said getting up. Jonathan disappeared behind the door into the kitchen.
"Man Max, something’s eating him alive." Mack said.
"Yeah." Max agreed.
"So what gives Max?"
"It’s got to be a woman. Only a woman can bring a man down that low." Jack responded.
"That’d be true for one of us losers but Jonathan, what woman in her right mind would resist him?" Mack said.
"So what is it Max?"
"You guys talk too much you know that?" Max got up. "I’m going to check on Mr. H."
The others shrugged and played poker.
Max entered the kitchen to find Jonathan leaning over the sink, his head held low.
"You okay Mr. H.?"
"Yeah Max." Jonathan said pulling himself together. "Just give me a minute."
"Okay. I got the beer."
Jonathan heard the door swing shut leaving him alone. Alone. Even as an orphan, Jonathan couldn’t remember ever feeling as alone as he felt at that moment. It was a feeling that seemed to permeate every fiber of his being. No matter how much he slept, how much he drank, how much he worked, nothing could dull the excruciating grief. He would give anything to see her smile again. He wanted to hold her close, to kiss her sweet lips, drown in her deep brown eyes. After three days, he didn’t feel any closer to getting over her. In fact, he realized that the emptiness would be permanent in his life.
"Hey, Jen. How was the trip?" Carla asked in the lounge.
"Fine." Jennifer answered stirring cream into her coffee.
"That’s it? I have been waiting two days, since you got back, to hear all about it and ‘fine’ is all I get."
"What do you want me to say?" Jennifer asked.
"What is he really like? What was the plane like? What’s his house like…"
"It’s just like everyone says." Jennifer could feel the semblance of control that she’d gathered begin to slip.
"Jennifer? What’s wrong with you?"
"What? I’m fine. I’m just busy. And I don’t know what all the fuss about Jonathan Hart is about."
Carla watched Jennifer. She knew she wasn’t getting the real story. "Why don’t you want to talk about it?"
Because if I do I will lose control and never get it back. "Really Carla, I’m just very busy. I’m putting together a new book and planning my trip to Africa."
Carla nodded more to concede than agree. "Okay. I have some projects to get together too. I’ll see ya around."
Jennifer pressed her hands to her eyes hoping to stop the flow of tears. It had been three days since she left Jonathan. Since she felt his arms hold her, his lips tasting hers, his body molded around her. God she missed that wonderfully sexy smile and his boyish arrogance and charm. The way his eyes looked into hers. Time was not healing her pain at all. In fact, she was certain she was moving closer to melt down the longer she was away from him.
Jonathan stood on the balcony of his apartment watching the darkness of the pre-dawn sky begin to give way to the colors of day. He hadn’t been able to sleep. Instead of fighting it, he got up and began to brood over the recent events in his life.
He had hoped the poker game the night before would have taken his mind off the dull ache that was now a constant in his life. No luck. Jonathan sighed. It was time to face the fact that there would be no getting over Jennifer.
"How long you been up, Mr. H.?" Max asked coming out on to the deck. He handed Jonathan a cup of hot coffee.
"I don’t know Max. It feels like days."
"That’s probably right." Max came to stand next to Jonathan. "So tell me, why are we here?"
"What?"
"Well, if you don’t mind my saying so Mr. H., women like Ms. Edwards, if you’re lucky, come around only once in a lifetime. So why are we here and she’s in New York?"
Jonathan looked up at Max, pondering his question. He’d answered it in his head a million times. "She’s got a career in New York and mine is here."
"Come on Mr. H. You ain’t gonna make me believe that. People these days can write anywhere. And you have an office in New York. London too."
"If only it were that easy Max. But she travels....."
"It is that easy." Max spoke softly but there was firmness in his voice. "You are in a position to do whatever it is you want. So what do you want, really want, Mr. H."
"Jennifer."
"Right. So let me ask you again, why are we standing here in the middle of night when its rush hour now in New York?"
Max was right. Why was he sitting here pining when he could be with Jennifer?
"I don’t know Max, but I am going to change that. I need your help. Can you call George Atkins..."
"Your attorney?"
"Right. I need to see him as soon as possible." Jonathan headed into the apartment to his bedroom. "I need to call Deann right when she gets in and have her arrange a meeting with all the VP’s. It is going to take me a few days to get business sorted out..." Jonathan headed to the bathroom to turn on the shower.
"Right."
"And, call up Cartier, let them know I will be by this afternoon .."
"The jeweler. Right."
"And, Max?" Jonathan stopped abruptly and turned to Max. "Thank you."
"Right!"
Jennifer’s anguish overwhelmed her. She put her hand over her heart. She loved her life but she knew she loved Jonathan more. She came to realize that she hadn’t wanted to live her life without roots or personal commitments. Her constant working and traveling were her way of avoiding those things because they seemed out of reach to her. She had always been so careful to protect her heart since Elliot Manning. Elliot had shared her taste for adventure but she was devastated to find out that he hunted the very animals she was trying to save. His response was arrogant and hurtful. "You can’t save them all Jennifer. I don’t know why you bother trying." It seemed like a little thing but it represented Elliot’s take on life... all for Elliot who cares about anyone else.
Jennifer wondered if Jonathan hurt for her. It had been a week now since she left. Her pain was as piercing as the moment she left his side. Was his pain diminishing over time? Had a week healed his loss? She had heard him whisper he loved her. She couldn’t imagine the beautiful few days they had together was anything but a once in a lifetime experience. Certainly he felt it too. So why didn’t he call? Why hadn’t she let him take her to the airport as he had asked to do? Boy Jennifer, you sure messed this up.
Jennifer rolled over in bed. She just couldn’t do it anymore. She couldn’t get up and face the day. Pulling the blankets over her head, she retreated from the world.
Pounding. What is that pounding? Jennifer thought as she slowly woke from a fitful sleep.
"Jennifer, come on. We know you’re in there." Jennifer rolled over. Patricia and Carla. Probably coming to check on her.
"Go away." Jennifer called although she was certain they didn’t hear her. The pounding continued. They’re not going to stop, Jennifer thought. Dragging herself out of bed, she slipped on a robe and headed to the front door.
"I’m not really in the mood for company today girls." Jennifer said opening the door.
Patricia and Carla tried to hide their astonishment at Jennifer’s appearance. "Day? Why, Jen, its seven in the evening. Have you been in bed all day?"Carla asked.
"I’m not feeling well."
"Staying in bed isn’t going to help what ills you?" Patricia said pushing her way into Jennifer’s apartment. "Really, Jennifer, it’s not like you fall apart like this."
"Turns out I’m human too." Jennifer said annoyed that her so-called friends would bud in on her pity-party.
"We just want to help," Carla said. "We brought pizza and enough wine to drunken an army."
"Would it matter if I wanted to be alone?"
"Not tonight." Patricia said putting the pizza on the coffee table and heading to Jennifer’s kitchen for some wineglasses and napkins.
Jennifer acquiesced. Shutting the door she went to sit on the couch.
"So what the hell is going on with you Jennifer?" Patricia said when she returned.
"It’s nothing really."
"Nothing my ass. Jennifer you have been moping around for a week. You snap at us when we try to talk to you even about things other than whatever it is that is bugging you."
"You always look like you are about to cry or have a nervous breakdown." Carla added trying to soften Patricia’s confrontation.
"It’s been a hard week."
"So tell us about it. I told you about the affair Jim had...." Patricia reminded her.
"And I told you about that night with Craig Andrews." Carla added.
Jennifer knew they were right. They were three friends who’d shared much joy and heartache over the years. But if she started talking about it, would she ever be able pull herself together again? Once the pain and grief were expressed, would they plague her forever?
"It’s Jonathan Hart, isn’t it?" Patricia asked more softly handing Jennifer a glass of wine.
"Bastard!" Carla spat. Her outburst surprised Jennifer and for the first time in a week she smiled.
"Your story is glowing about him. I’ll give it back if you want to revise it. Tell us the truth about that snake."
"It’s not like that." Jennifer said taking a long sip of wine.
"He didn’t break your heart?" Carla asked.
"Did you even give him your heart?" Patricia added.
"No, yes." Jennifer answered.
"What?"
Jennifer set her glass down and rubbed her eyes. "He’s everything everyone said he was and more. So much more." Unable to talk while seated, Jennifer got up and went to the window. Patricia and Carla waited eagerly to hear more. "And I fell in love with him."
"I don’t get it." Carla said. "Did he tell you he loved you?"
"He whispered it when he thought I was sleeping."
"Sleeping!" Carla and Patricia looked at each other. "Jennifer, did you sleep with him? After only a couple of days."
It was only a couple of days and yet, she felt she had known him a lifetime. She had connected with him in a way she’d never connected with anyone before. "Yes."
Carla started to say something but Patricia caught her eye. "So what’s the problem?"
"It just wouldn’t work. We knew it wouldn’t when we gave in to it."
"Why won’t it work?" Carla asked.
Jennifer turned to look at them wondering how they could be so dense. "I’m in New York, he’s in LA. I am hardly ever here and he’s got a company to run..."
"Wait. Hold on Jennifer. You don’t work on Wall Street... you’re a writer. You can work wherever the hell you want to. In fact you usually do..."
"Right, I travel a lot..."
"You don’t have to though. Jennifer, you are gone, what, maybe a total of 6 weeks out of a whole year? Besides, you’re writing a book now. You don’t need to travel for that."
Carla nodded. "If you love him Jennifer, isn’t it worth it to make the changes. You can write in LA. By the pool even."
Jennifer turned back to the window. Why did her reasoning make sense to her in her mind but it sounded so foolish when she told her friends. And why didn’t she think it would be as easy as they said it would be.
"Look Jen. We can’t tell you what to do. You have only known him a couple days so it may too early to tell. But, you are one pathetic woman right now. And if all this grief you’re going through is because you love him and he loves you, well then move. Life is too short not to grab the best of what it has to offer."
Jennifer came to sit down next to them and took another long sip of wine. They were right. At one time her writing was her life because that was all she had passion for, all that she could trust. But Jonathan changed all that.
"I want to be with him so much…" Jennifer confessed as tears rolled down her cheeks.
"So, now that we’ve got that straight, lets help you pack." Carla said getting up.
"And a little make-over won’t hurt either." Patricia said standing.
"What?" Jennifer asked confused.
"Come on." Patricia went to her purse. "Here. A ticket to LA. You leave tomorrow, early."
"You bought me a plane ticket?"
"Yes. Now come on."
"I thought you thought he broke my heart." Jennifer couldn’t help but smile now.
"We figured that if he broke your heart you needed to go kick his ass. And if he didn’t you needed just to go to him." Patricia said.
"So, Jen. You spent the night with Jonathan Hart." Carla said as she opened Jennifer’s closet.
"Two nights actually." Jennifer said all of a sudden feeling giddy.
"And?" Pat asked.
"You wouldn’t believe me if I told you."
"Oh God, I knew it. He’s incredible isn’t he?" Carla said.
"I wasn’t so bad either," Jennifer said with a glint in her eye.
"Well, of course you weren’t. Look who you had to work with." The three women laughed as they helped Jennifer pack.
"I can’t believe you guys are doing this for me. Buying a ticket and everything." Jennifer said when they were finished and eating pizza.
"Don’t get too excited," Carla started. "It’s only a one-way ticket."
"On the other hand, if this works out, you can name your first born girl after us," Patricia said.
"Oh, yes. Carla Patricia."
"Patricia Carla."
"It was my idea to buy the ticket." Carla argued.
"It was my idea to come here in the first place." Patricia argued back.
"George why isn’t this done?" Jonathan asked as he stood up from behind his desk. "It’s been several days now."
"Jonathan it’s not that easy to walk away from Hart Industries and yet maintain your controlling interest."
"Then get rid of it."
"You don’t mean that." George watched Jonathan carefully. He’d never seen Jonathan so frustrated and irritated. "This company needs you even if it’s just as a figure head. The paper work is coming together. The execs know what they need to do. I just need til Monday, Tuesday at the latest."
Jonathan began to pace. Monday or Tuesday. Today is Friday, he thought. He’d planned to be on his way to New York that evening. Now he had to wait the weekend.
"Why don’t you go visit her over the weekend. Then come back."
Jonathan’s head shot up. "What makes you think this is about a woman?"
George smiled. "The only thing that could cause you to turn over operation of Hart Industries is a woman."
Jonathan thought a moment. Maybe he could go to New York for the weekend. No that wouldn’t work. The whole purpose of this was to be able to tell her he had no ties to prevent him from being with her. It wouldn’t set a good example to see her for two days and then have to leave ‘on business’. No it all had to be taken care of before he could find her.
"Just get it done." Jonathan said.
George nodded. "Monday."
"Mr. Hart?" Deann said as she entered his office. "You wanted to see me?"
"Yes, Deann. Come in." Deann took a seat across from Jonathan’s desk. "I am going out of town this afternoon for the weekend. Up to the ranch. If anyone asks though, you don’t know where I am.’
"Right, Mr. Hart."
"Unless there is an emergency." Jonathan got up and put on his coat.
"Right."
"Monday morning I want to see all the VP’s first thing." He picked up his briefcase and headed to the door.
"Yes sir. I’ll arrange it." Deann followed him out of the office.
"I’ll see you Monday Deann."
"Have a good trip Mr. Hart." Deann watched as he entered the elevator. She sighed, wondering if the old Mr. Hart would ever be back. She opened her Rolodex to call the secretaries of the VP about the meeting on Monday. She had just about called them all when the elevator doors opened.
"Hello Deann."
"Ms. Edwards?" Deann said in surprise. "Did you have an appointment?"
"Ah, no. I’m afraid not. Can I see Jon…Mr. Hart anyway?"
"He left about 45 minutes ago."
"I see." Deann could see the disappointment in Jennifer. In fact she could see the same pain and lost look that had been plaguing Mr. Hart since…. Well since Jennifer left a week ago. "Any chance you can tell me where he went? Did he go home?"
"I have orders not to tell unless…." Deann bit her lower lip.
Jennifer took a deep breath trying to ward off the tears. She watched as Deann began to scribble something on her steno pad.
"He’s at the ranch. Here are the directions."
"I thought you said…"
"Ya well, he said unless it was an emergency. Something tells me this is an emergency."
Jennifer smiled. "Thank you Deann."
"But, if he’s not happy ….…"
"Don’t worry, I won’t reveal my source."
"Great! Thanks Ms. Edwards."
Jennifer left the building. She had taken a taxi from the airport to Hart Industries but she couldn’t take a cab to the ranch. She needed to rent a car. Stopping a security guard, she was able to learn there was a car rental place just up the street.
It was just over an hour when Jennifer drove out of the city and headed to the ranch.
