Regis Philbin-"Screech" II
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Why Recruit Delawarean Refugees
Delaware is so pathetic people from Delaware don't have names. Delawareans? Delawareitese? But that's a different rant. Screech recruits refugees because if he gets the most, then he wins the most coveted prize known to mankind--an original Kenny G. 8 track tape. |
Kenny G.? Who Listens to Kenny G.?
That's part of a future conspiracy. Anywho, the reason the tape is so important is because it was once spit on by my personal lord and savior, Sports Illustrated Columnist Rick Reilly. As Screech knows, His spit contains divine powers that will allow us to find out the answer to the question that has driven Screech and Simon for their entire lives-what is up with John Travolta and Jay Leno's chins? |
Kenny G.? Who Listens to Kenny G.?
With His spit and the reason for Travolta and Leno's chins Screech will know how to put the same chins on every Psychic Gypsy. This will make the thought of becoming a Psychic Gypsy so embarrassing that they will immediately give up and hope to become normal, thus letting the Martians on the Moon rule the world! |
