101 to 150

101.You clean your nails with a stick.

102.You prefer car keys to a Q-tip.

103.People are scared to touch your wife's bathrobe.

104.Your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack.

105.You think a Volvo is part of a woman's anatomy.

106.You've ever used a toilet seat as a picture frame.

107.Your home has more miles on it than your car.

108.Your Christmas tree is still up in March.

109.You've ever been arrested for loitering.

110.There is a stuffed possum anywhere in your house.

111.You hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look nice.

112.You've ever shot anyone for looking at you. You own a homemade fur coat.

113.Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

114.Your momma has "ammo" on her Christmas list.

115.You've totaled every car you've ever owned.

116.There are more than five McDonald's bags currently on the floorboard of your car.

117.Momma taught you how to flip a cigarette.

118.There is a wasp nest in your living room.

119.The Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes you voice.

120.You give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday.

121.There has ever been crime scene tape on your front door.

122.You burn your front yard rather than mow it.

123.You consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.

124.Fewer than half of your cars run.

125.You've ever been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.

126.The taillight covers of your car are made of tape.

127.Your car has never had a full tank of gas.

128.Any of your kids were conceived in a car wash.

129.Your momma has ever been involved in a cuss fight with the principal.

130.You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.

131.You've ever bathed with flea and tick soap.

132.Your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.

133.You stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.

134.Your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.

135.You've ever been involved in a custody fight over a huntin' dog.

136.You're an expert on worm beds.

137.The dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house.

138.Your wife has ever said, "Come move this transmission so I can take a bath!"

139.Your family tree does not fork.

140.The flood history of the area can be seen on your living room walls.

141.You haul more than U-Haul.

142.Your momma has ever stomped into the house and announced, "The feud is back on!"

143.There is a gun rack on your bicycle.

144.Your wedding was held in the delivery room.

145.Your soap on a rope doubles as an air freshener.

146.Your wife's hairdo attracts bees.

147.Your baby's first words are "Attention K-Mart shoppers."

148.The antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.

149.Your primary source of income is the pawn shop.

150.You can't visit relatives without getting mud on your tires.