By Katie
Copyright 2000
“Father, please you have to let us stay here. We don’t have anywhere else to go. I will not subject my children to the type of environment that we were living in and I cannot believe that you would want me to take them back there!”
Mary’s face was desperate, but set as she pleaded with her father to let her and her children stay in the large house that only he and her mother occupied. She had known that it would be hard to convince her father to let them stay. He had disapproved of the relationship that Mary had had with Jeffrey Boggs from the beginning. He was a deeply religious man who had been mortified when his beloved daughter, his only child, announced that she was moving in with a man who was not her husband. He prayed for her soul every night, but he wasn’t sure if he wanted her or her bastard children living under his roof. He listened to her pleadings, but wasn’t at all sure what the right thing to do was. He looked at her with stoic eyes as she continued to beg for his forgiveness and help.
“Please Daddy, if not for me then for the children.” She gestured to where her babies were huddled near the entrance to the house, uncomfortable with the tension filled scenario they were witnessing and tired to the point of exhaustion from the many weeks of travel that had brought them to this point.
William McCloud was a proud man. He had worked hard in order to accomplish what he had and his wife had stood by him through thick and thin. He looked to her for guidance in the matter of their daughter, but she just stood there, her eyes letting him know that no matter what he decided it would be her choice as well.
William shook his head tiredly. Sometime it would be so much easier if his wife would take responsibility for some of the more difficult decisions that he had to make. But she wouldn’t and he could see just by looking into his daughter’s eyes that Mary wasn’t going to leave without a fight.
“Mary, you and you children can stay here for the night and tomorrow we’ll discuss this in length. This is a difficult decision for me to make. We haven’t seen you in ten years and you show up with three children and no means of providing for them. Please understand how hard this is for me and your mother. We both love you and we’ve forgiven you for your past, but we are going to have to think about the responsibility we’d be taking on by letting you stay here.”
“Father, I’m your daughter! Surely you understand that I did what I had to do and that I’m…,” Mary stopped protesting as her father interrupted her.
“Mary, you can take your old room upstairs and the children can take the one that connects to it. As I said before, we’ll discuss this in more detail in the morning. Goodnight.” With that said, William turned and walked over to his wife, kissed her gently on the cheek, and, with a soft, “Goodnight Maggie” he walked upstairs, leaving his wife, his daughter, and three very tired, very scared children to whatever the evening might hold for them.
Mary stood in the center of the room wondering what she had gotten herself into this time and watched with no small amount of envy and regret as her mother accepted her father’s kiss. As William walked up the stairs her mother turned to her. Mary just looked at her for a few moments and then threw herself into her mother’s arms and began to cry.
“There, there, Mary” Margaret whispered, “You’ll scare the children.”
Mary was, however, past the point where she capable of thinking about what the children might think about her tears. She held onto her mother as though she was a lifeline that could take her away from the frightening place her life had become. She cried for her foolishness. She cried for the helplessness of herself and of her children. She cried because she was so tired of carrying the incredible weight that responsibility for three lives had brought. But mostly she cried for herself. She had loved Jeffrey Boggs at one time. Before he had become obsessed with money and consumed with greed he had been everything she had ever wanted in a man. She remembered how he had first appeared to her at a dance many years ago. He had been so full of life and sophistication and she was truly convinced that he was the man for her. She cried for the loss of the man that Jeffrey Boggs had been, for she had loved that man. But she could not love what he had become and it hurt her to know that her love wasn’t enough to hold him. She cried so hard that she wasn’t even fully aware when her mother put her into bed, as she had done when Mary was a very small girl. All Mary knew was that, except for three small children who’s safety and welfare were hers to safeguard, she was alone. Mary Louise McCloud cried herself to sleep that night and, in sleep, found in herself a way to keep going and a way to put the past behind her. She awoke from that night a stronger person who was once again capable of shouldering her burdens and facing what lied ahead.
Mary straightened her dress, patted down a few locks of the curly hair that had strayed from the fashionable twist that she had put it up into, and walked downstairs, ready to talk to her father. She was ready to convince him that she was a responsible adult who was ready to accept what was laid in front of her. She was ready to secure a future for the three small figures still sleeping in the next room who had become her life. Mary Louise McCloud was ready to move on and she would do whatever it took to give her children the life that they deserved.
Mary walked downstairs and stopped just outside the dining room where her father sat reading the paper and eating his breakfast as he’d done every morning for 30 years. She took a deep breath, squared her shoulders, and entered the room.
“Good morning Father.”
It had been hard getting used to living under her parents roof again, but Mary had promised herself that her children would have the best she could provide. She thought back to the morning when she had walked down to breakfast ready to battle with her father only to have him put his arms around her and tell her that he loved her no matter what. She could still hear his voice when he told her what a fool he’d been. “Mary, I am so sorry for what I put you through. You’re my daughter and I do love you with all my heart. I was prepared to be angry at you. You hurt me very much when you left all those years ago like you did. But, well … I went into your room last night after you’d fallen asleep and I just stood there and looked at your children. I realized that they are a part of me almost as much as they are a part of you. I think I knew I didn’t stand a chance when I noticed that Louise has the exact same nose as my mother did. Mary, please stay here as long as you need to. I’m your father and it’s about time I started to act like it.” Mary smiled as she thought about how well her father had ended up bonding with her children. She could see that Louise was his favorite. He spent hours with her out in the corral, teaching her how to care for the horses. Mary loved to watch her daughter ride. She was very confidant and incredibly capable. Horses had always made Mary somewhat nervous, but she was glad that her daughter was finally able to fulfill her dream of being able to take care of and love a horse. Mary walked over to the corral where her father and daughter were practicing in the soft, late-afternoon sun.
“That’s right Louise. You’ve got it. Just loosen up on those reins and you’ll be fine. Oh, hello Mary. I thought you’d be getting ready to move this family of mine into that small house downtown that you’ve decided you love so much.”
“I was packing all this morning and you know that it’s time for us to get our own place. We’ve all loved staying here with you, but we are only going to be a few minutes into town and you know as well as I do that the children will still be here all the time.”
“I’m just going to miss having them and, of course, you here all the time. Town just seems so far away when you’re living out here, but I suppose you’re right, you are going to need a place of your own, especially now that the kids are getting older,” William turned and saw that Louise had pulled her horse up to the side of the fence and was waiting for him to help her down.
“Good job sweetheart. You get better everyday. Go get washed up for dinner.”
William watched his oldest grandchild run towards the house eager to tell her grandmother about her ‘lesson’.
“I swear Mary that girl must have been born on the back of a horse. She has a talent that very few people possess, whether they be male or female.”
Mary shook her head. “She is an excellent rider and I’m glad that she’s enjoying it so much, but don’t you think that it’s time you started to teach her how to ride sidesaddle. She’s only a little girl now, but sooner or later she’s going to grow up and she needs to learn what’s proper and what isn’t.”
“There’s plenty of time for that yet, Mary my girl. She’s only nine years old and somehow I don’t think she’d take well to riding sidesaddle. She’s to spirited to care much for all those rules that society puts on people. Even I never saw the point in riding like that.”
“Well, be that as it may, I think it’s time for her to start to learn. Children grow up fast and, as much as they may not like it, they need to learn some sense of propriety. You should remember that Dad. Surely I grew up faster than you thought.”
“Sometimes I think you were born grown up, but I guess you’re right about the riding. I’ll start teaching her how to ride sidesaddle sometime within the next week, but I’m telling you she’s not going to like it.”
“Thank you Daddy. Lets go get cleaned up for dinner. Tomorrow’s a big day for all of us and we’ll need the energy to move all our stuff into that ‘small house of ours’.”
Mary laughed as she took her father’s arm as they walked towards the house. Neither of them paid any notice to the fact that behind them the setting sun was beginning to cast shadows on the ground that they walked upon.
To be continued...
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