In an undercover investigation, it was discovered that Matthew Croix IS in fact, the clingiest person who has ever lived, both emotionally AND physically. Reporter ook E. monster was wandering when he saw Matthew clutching Molly in the cling of death and was draining her of her energy. In an interview with the Molly, she told us that, "matt once tried to cling to me as I jumped off a bridge" and then she told us that she was tired. When psychologists gave Matthew a test of every sort, the answer ended in either "Molly?" or "Man, I REALLY gotta go to the restroom facility..." It has been found that to ward off clingy Matthews, simple things such as shark repelents, saying "no", and/or attacking him with swift pokes or tickles, but it is not known if clingy Matthews can be completely prevented against, so it is suggested to remain indoors and to not in ANY way be very fun and pleasant to talk to or to be beautiful or shiny. If you spot a clingy Matthew, please call toll not free: (123)555-6969
