Syllables and Objects

After re-working my poems several times, I finally have a winner with this one. I just thought of the notion of lollipops being a naughty little food. It took me a while to try and show the evidence, but I managed to do it at long last. There are three images in the poem that I am very fond of. The first one, “Two pieces. Easy childhood dream/At first, but/Look closer. Only a stick for/support and/The tasty seduction in/Sweet colors/And tastes. Same shape brand new/Prize in the/Center, if you know what I/ mean, blows my/Mind about how a simple thing/can be so/Naughty. Girls adding to it/ are so wrong.” (Lines 11-24) I pretty much broke down the simplicity of the lollipop and gave it a bit of a naughty twist to it. The prize in the center part is my favorite in the line so far.

The next line that I like goes like this, “The girl can be as ugly/as sin, but/Give her a lollipop, boys/Turn into/Drooling pit bulls in the high/Summer day/Heat just looking at it. Even/much higher/When A Barbie doll looking/is eating.” (Lines 25-34) I love the image in the lines because you can see the boys drooling over both the ugly girl and the pretty one. The summer part is the best in my opinion. But those lines pale in comparison to my final selection. “Girl with her provocative/message to/Men. Boys watch on like hungry/lions to/A slim grazing deer in the/tall grass to/the very end when the stick/is left and/Thrown away carelessly/like women/Always do with the men they/Do not want/Anymore. Women are such/teases aren’t they?” (Lines 57-70) This is my best line for the reason that I not only described the boys and the girl sucking on her lollipop, but that I snapped the audience back to reality with the ending image as well. All in a nice little pinch.

Ezra Pound would be proud of my images because they draw on the emotional and intellectual part of his definition. My images draw out a lusty tone to them and challenge the mind to think provocatively about the subject of a lollipop.

Over all, I think I did a great job re-working this poem in the end.